Vibe

by Liza James

  “Are you feeling better?” he asks, his sleepy voice low and rough against my skin.

  Something tingles along my arms, something different and eerie.

  “Yes,” I reply quietly, turning my head slightly to look over my shoulder at him. His lips drop to the nape of my neck as he kisses me. “I’m so sorry about earlier, Hawk. So sorry. The nightmare, it just—it took over and that was so reckless. So dangerous. I had no idea what was happening.” My words fall out quickly, my heart rate picking up pace at the mention of what I had almost done. But his hand slides down my thigh, brushing along my skin as if he doesn’t realize how serious that could have been.

  “It’s okay, baby. I know you didn’t mean to. It’s been a long time since you’ve had those dreams. You want to tell me what happened? You ready to talk about it?” His hand clamps down tightly around my thigh for a split second before he releases and trails his fingers higher.

  A red flag is sounding somewhere in my head, far off and hardly noticeable. But something feels off about this, and he’s acting like he cares to talk but his hands and his body are saying something else.

  “No, I don’t want to talk about it,” I say cautiously. Not like this, not while I’m sensing something amiss here.

  Suddenly, Hawk rolls over, forcing me on my stomach. His strong body presses mine into the mattress as he rolls his erection against my ass. His hand slips between us, brushing against my core over my silky shorts. His knee kicks my legs farther apart, giving him more room to move against me.

  “So fucking wet, babe. Were you thinking of me?” He grinds harder, slipping his fingers into the leg of my shorts so he can play with my pussy.

  I’m not turned on, honestly. I’m worried, and afraid because I don’t want him to know the truth. Not yet.

  He isn’t the one I was thinking about when I got hot for someone’s touch. His hands aren’t the ones I wanted on my skin then—they aren’t the hands I want on me now. And that’s what scares me the most. I’m still drunk on the heady touch of Ruby, still clouded with lust for her body and her words.

  But he can’t know that.

  He pushes his fingers inside of me and I instinctually roll my hips away from his touch. I’m still sore from Ruby just minutes ago, and Hawk’s hands are bigger, rougher against my flesh.

  Ruby touched me like she was savoring my skin, experiencing my body moving in sync with hers. I can still feel the way her hands left lingering trails of ecstasy across my arms, my chest, my throat. Her voice breathes through my ears, even while Hawk tears my shorts from my ass in a way he’s never done before. When he moves to immediately push inside of me and I’m forced to spread my legs wider to accommodate him, it’s her filthy words that play on repeat in my head.

  “Hawk, wait—” I try to slow him down, surprised by his sudden change in demeanor. He’s usually so much gentler than this.

  “You fucking owe me.” His voice is deep and sadistic, a threatening tenor laces his words. His lips drop to my ear as his hand holds me down by the base of my neck. I can’t even respond to ask him what the fuck he means by that.

  I owe him? My heart skyrockets and my stomach plummets with the realization that maybe he wasn’t asleep like I thought he was. Maybe he heard me with Ruby, maybe he already knows.

  And he’s pissed. He’s fucking livid as he pulls all the way out to slam back inside of me. I can’t even take a moment to breathe and possibly find my own orgasm in this, because this isn’t what I’m used to. I don’t mind rough, I don’t mind submitting to him. In fact, I think those are things I’d really enjoy if I was given the time to work into them, to feel them in our moments together.

  But the vibe is off in this. He’s taking and taking and refusing to give.

  No, this is a punishment. And I’m afraid he doesn’t even know my greatest crime yet. I don’t know exactly what he’s punishing me for. Is it the gun? I know he said it was okay, but I felt like that wasn’t necessarily true when he spoke the words.

  He continues pounding into me, holding me down by the back of my head so that I can’t move. The sounds of his grunts and the whimpers of my own mouth are drowned out by the creaking of the bed as the headboard slams against the wall.

  Thump. Thump. Thump.

  Suddenly he stills, rolling himself forward as he comes and he’s buried so deeply inside of me that I have to gasp in order to catch a solid breath.

  “Shut the fuck up!” Bethie yells through the thin walls of our apartment. She’s on the other side of us, which means she and Chad can hear everything.

  And so can Ruby.

  Fuck me. What the fuck have I done?

  It shouldn’t have mattered, listening to Hawk fuck Aura in the room next to mine last night.

  I shouldn’t have cared.

  I don’t fucking care.

  He’s her boyfriend, she made a mistake, and I was the faulty wire in that electrical burst of energy between us. Honestly, I got one solid orgasm out of her, one submission and vulnerable moment and I can take off with my own dignity intact. I don’t give a shit what she wants to deny or forget or regrets doing, I’m perfectly happy moving forward on my own without a single thought left to whatever weird fucking night Aura gave me.

  So, when I slowly step out of the small, plain white room I slept in last night, I make my way to the kitchen in order to hopefully find a pot of coffee, or something I can at least fucking brew.

  I walk through the narrow hallway, finally observing and taking in the actual space Hawk and Aura live in. It’s clean, incredibly so. But not in a homey, comfortable sort of way.

  This doesn’t feel lived in. It doesn’t feel like a home.

  Aura’s planters are strewn across eclectically mismatched shelves. Some are white, some are a darker shade of walnut wood. Copper pipes are drilled into the walls in order to accent each shelf while countless different plants rest on the flat surfaces. A few of them hang from the ceiling in macramé planters and I can’t help but love the messy way her refreshing vibes tend to decorate.

  Because this part—the plants—they feel like her.

  My eyes drop to the brown suede couch that rests in the corner of the living room, and then slowly rake over the floor behind the planter. Where I had my hand down Aura’s pants and up her fucking shirt last night.

  My skin tingles, soft reminders of her cautious touch wash over my flesh. Her sounds, those sexy and timid moans that grew more and more confident drift through my mind as my feet stop moving and I become lost in the memory.

  Bitch.

  She doesn’t get to let me touch her like that, fuck her like that and then pretend like every second of it was a mistake.

  But maybe she is right. Mistakes can feel like that—tempting, delicious, enticing. That misstep was intoxicating. It ignited my blood and scorched through my body like a wildfire. It was all consuming, a constant needy throb that begged for my hands, my lips, to be on her skin.

  I couldn’t say no.

  “What are you staring at, Rubes?” Hawk’s voice startles me. It’s quick and loud as he practically shouts from the space in the kitchen where he’s leaning against the counter. He’s holding a mug, hot coffee steams from the lip as he lifts it and takes another sip. His eyes stay on me though, and it’s the first time I notice something dark, something hesitant that sends an uncomfortable flash through my mind. “You enjoying my planter over there?”

  He smirks. A sarcastic, tilt to his lips and I can’t help but feel the need to steel my spine and move towards him. So, I do, taking each step intentionally slowly as I scan the counter for the pot of coffee. Spotting it on the right of him, I step even closer, until my chest is flush against his and I have to reach around his arm for the empty mugs available.

  “Aren’t those Aura’s plants?” I ask, my voice takes on a dangerous lilt that I’m not ashamed of. I don’t know what game he’s playing, but I’m not fucking afraid of whatever it is.

  “Aura and I live here together. We�
�ve been together for the last two years. I would venture to say they’re our plants,” he replies, but his voice is oddly defensive for something as ridiculous as fucking plants.

  “Are you trying to tell me that I can’t steal a plant on my way out the door today?” I let my gaze fall from his as I step to the side and pour myself a cup, making myself at home as I open his fridge and look for the creamer.

  “I’m trying to tell you that you can’t steal anything when you fucking leave here.”

  I turn towards him again, letting my eyes fall to his as I take a slow, languid sip of the hot coffee. I’m silent, deliberately enjoying the few seconds it takes for the hot liquid to slip down my throat and warm my skin.

  “Good news for you, big boy. I have no intentions of stealing your plants.” I turn away, walking back towards the living room before I turn on my heels again and continue speaking to him. “I’ll let Aura take care of those when she dumps your ass and moves in with me.”

  His jaw ticks, and I watch as he swallows slowly before choosing to speak. His eyes narrow and he sets his cup down on the counter before he crosses his thick arms over his strong chest. “How long do you plan on keeping this shit up with my girlfriend?”

  “I’m sorry, what shit are you referring to?” I tilt my head to the side, feigning innocence.

  “I’m not fucking stupid, you know what I’m talking about.”

  “I don’t know, how long do you plan on sneaking into your kitchen in the middle of the night with Aura’s best friend?” I say it, I fucking confront it. Because it wasn’t lost on me last night. Why in the Hell would Bethie and Hawk be together at three in the fucking morning? He’s an idiot if he thinks he can get away with that for long.

  “You don’t know what you’re fucking talking about.” That’s his only answer. A stupid, cliché one for someone who acts so intelligent.

  I laugh, a bitter roll of sad sounds as I shake my head and turn away from him.

  “I get to watch,” he shouts after me and suddenly I’m aware of the entire house waking up to the sound of his heated voice. I halt my steps, immediately turning my gaze to him. Anger flashes through my chest, sending shockwaves of rage and even defense of Aura unfurling through my limbs. How fucking dare he?

  “Excuse me?” I ask incredulously. Because he cannot be saying what I think he’s saying.

  “You heard me. If you fuck her, I get to be there. I get to watch. I’m her fucking boyfriend.” He stands, his voice resonates with confidence of his demands, as if there’s no other option I can take. If I want her, I have to do it his way.

  I step forward and set my mug down on the counter before continuing towards him. My shoulders fall back, my chin tips up, and I let every single ounce of strength and anger release through me. I want him to feel it in my energy, in the space around us and in the tension that’s boiling through the room.

  My chest comes up to his, my fingers trail up his muscular arms while I drop my other hand to the waist band of his grey sweats. I pull, dragging his hips against my own while my hand wraps around the back of his neck in a gentle, seductive touch. He dips his head down and I lift on my toes so that I can brush my lips against his skin.

  He’s already getting hard, and while I’m thoroughly disgusted by his insidious, possessive and borderline misogynist behavior, I grind my hips against his—just to ensnare him a little further into my web.

  I pull him against me, rolling my body against his while his hands fall to my waist and he grips me tightly. Tighter than I expect, honestly, but I’m not thrown off by it. My lips move against his neck, trailing higher until I can whisper in his ear. “When I fuck your girlfriend—because I will fuck Aura…” My fingers bite into the back of his neck and grit my teeth as his hold on my waist tightens as well. “You won’t be anywhere near her. Fuck off, ass wipe.”

  I release my hold and push away roughly, sending him back just a step before he quickly launches forward. He’s big, but because I’m smaller and quicker and I easily step out before he can grip my arm.

  I step to the side, twisting so that my back is to him as I try to round the corner into the hallway but suddenly my head whips back as a harsh pain rips through my scalp and I realize his fist is twisted in my hair.

  “Mother fucker,” I bite out trying to keep my voice down when my back hits his hard chest. His lips dip down to my ear as he yanks my head to the side and holds me against him.

  “Stay the fuck away from my girlfriend. I let you have last night, but that’s all you fucking get. I don’t know who the Hell you are, but I’m done being kind. Aura has work to finish. You stayed in my home last night, get the fuck out this morning. Don’t come back.” His voice is dark and thick as it rakes across my ears.

  I’m silent for a moment, processing exactly what he’s saying and whether I should let this go or not. But even while Aura’s decided to believe what we did was a mistake, I can’t help but feel an even stronger pull to be near her now. To make sure this psychopath doesn’t hurt her like I’m suddenly realizing he can.

  “I’ve known you for twenty-four hours, Hawk. And if I gave you any impression during that short period of time that you could somehow, dictate what I do, then you are sorely fucking mistaken.” I move to shift forward and yank my head out of his grasp, but just as I move, I notice Bethie quickly stepping into the kitchen. Her eyes fall on me, and then dart to Hawk, and then move back towards me as she presses her lips into a tight line across her face.

  I wait, curious as to how she’s going to respond but also not holding any hope for the outcome. Part of me wonders if she’ll take the side she clearly should and tell Hawk to fuck off.

  Another door opens in the hallway, and I hear soft, hurried steps that I can only assume are Aura’s. I think Chad would have heavier footfalls than that and he’s probably still passed out. Bethie’s eyes fly towards the hallway as she yells, “Ruby! What the fuck are you doing?”

  Hawk moves immediately, unfortunately shifting into a place where he looks compromised and I look like the seductress. His back is pressed against the counter and I’m now flipped so quickly that I can’t even begin to stop it before Aura enters the space. My chest is pressed tightly against his, my hands gripping his arms as I try to keep myself upright. But his hands are planted neatly on the counter behind him, as if he wasn’t just holding me against my fucking will.

  Bethie and him are a fucking match made in Heaven, I’ll give them that.

  Aura’s eyes fly to us and I stumble backwards, putting a solid distance between myself and Hawk. I roll my eyes in frustration, because this is seriously fucking ridiculous and hope that Aura can see right through this bullshit.

  “What the fuck is going on?” Aura repeats Bethie’s initial question and her best friend takes a step next to her, crossing her arms over her chest while they both confront us.

  “Ruby propositioned me a few minutes ago, asked me to come to the club tonight and watch her dance.” Hawk’s voice is innocent, and suddenly that kind, sweet nature he’s portrayed all night slips rightfully back in place. Honestly, I’m shocked at the ability he has to switch so easily between his deceptive masks.

  I scoff loudly as I cross my arms over my chest and turn towards Aura. “Seriously, Aura. He’s fucking lying. You know exactly how much I don’t give a shit about him,” I say confidently, but this strange flash of nerves rips through me. Suddenly I’m not so sure Aura will believe me over them. I keep forgetting that I haven’t known her long at all, no matter how different this feels between us.

  I watch as her chest rises and falls in rapid movements. Her thin white tank falls loosely around her waist and her skimpy silk shorts ride way too high on her thighs. Images from last night explode at the front of my mind and at the worst possible timing in all of this. My eyes fall to her chest, watching—fucking appreciating—and lusting already. She’s stunning, in a quiet way. She’s sexual and tempting and exhilarating and my hands ache to be on her skin, on her neck as I
force her to look me in the eyes and know that he’s lying to her goddamn face.

  “But you don’t actually know her,” Bethie admonishes quietly, turning her gaze to face her friend as she places a gentle hand on her shoulder. “It’s hardly been twenty-four hours, Aura.”

  “Exactly. Baby, you know I wouldn’t go for someone like her. She’s a stripper for fuck’s sake. I like my girls a little more modest, a little more wholesome than that.” He steps towards her and pulls her against his chest, embracing her as his arms slip around her small waist.

  “Jesus Christ, you’re kidding me, right? You do realize that thought process is fucking misogynistic and disgusting? Go back to the fucking 1500’s with that bullshit.” I step around them, hoping to catch Aura’s eyes and let her actually see me while I speak in hopes that she can feel my energy, I don’t fucking know. I don’t know what I hope to find, I can’t expect her to trust me over them, not after one night.

  “She’s lying. Why do you think she was out here last night when you had your nightmare?” Bethie starts, stepping behind Aura as she wraps her arms around her from behind, They’re both surrounding her, literal snakes with their fucking lies and deceit and all of a sudden my heart begins racing at their implication. “I came out here because I overheard Hawk telling her to leave him alone, but she wouldn’t. She kept trying to get him to touch her.”

  “Okay, that’s a straight lie,” I bite out, stepping towards them when Aura’s head snaps to me. She puts up a hand, literally halting my movements so that I can’t come closer.

  “Aura, you can’t believe that. Not after last night, I didn’t do fucking shit to Hawk. You know he isn’t the one I want,” I whisper the words, grinding them out through my clenched teeth as rage permeates my skin and envelopes my mind. This is fucking insane. They’re manipulating her and she’s slipping right into it. I don’t get it, don’t understand why she’s so susceptible to their lies and deception.

  But I don’t know her past, and I have the strangest feeling that whatever has happened to her has fucked with her head so disastrously that she can’t help it.