Seth thumped his buddy soundly on the back and turned his eyes back to the mother of his child. Malnourished, weak and body ravaged with an incurable illness, but still beautiful beyond measure. No matter how many women he’d had over the years, he’d never felt anything toward them; nothing that compared to the way he felt about Lucy. The revelation hit him like a lightning bolt.
Had he known they’d had a son, he would’ve dropped everything and ran to her. His big, cushy lifestyle be damned. He’d have given it all up in a New York minute and that thought alone shocked him to his core. When had he gotten so soft? When had he gone from partying all hours of the night to being a responsible adult? How the hell had it happened and when?
Regardless, his heart swelled in his chest and he knew. He’d lied to himself all his life. He did want a family, he did want children. He wanted it all and he wanted it with Lucy and Jacob.
But, in retrospect, had she told him back then, he probably would’ve insisted she had an abortion or put the baby up for adoption. He hadn’t been ready back then, but now he was and it was that knowledge alone that finally made him understand why she’d kept it from him. She’d been mature enough to do the right thing for both of them and even though it cost him and his son four years, it gave them a lifetime to make it up.
If she let him and ‘if’ was a big word. He hadn’t exactly proven to her that he was as changed as he realized he was. Sure, he’d dropped everything and flown into town the moment she called him. But he’d done it thinking they’d rekindle a little romance from years past. Yes, he’d taken care of Jacob for a couple days, but being a dad 24/7 was a different story. He knew he’d have to prove himself far more capable and somewhere deep down, a need to have her approval roared to life.
If it came down to it, he would beg her to have him, flaws and all. And he would refuse to take ‘no’ for an answer. Especially not after seeing the way she looked at him; more correctly, not after understanding the way she looked at him.
Not for the first time since he’d been back in Pennsylvania, he saw the admiration and the love in her eyes and recognized it for what it was. How long had she felt that way for him?
“You should’ve told me,” Seth declared and moved to her side. Since Chris had lowered himself into the visitor’s chair, Seth sat on the edge of Lucy’s bed. Her feeble body didn’t occupy much room, but she moved her legs over anyway to allow him plenty of space.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” he asked even though he knew the answer. He wanted to hear what she had to say.
“Are you kidding me?” Lucy snapped, her face flushing red. “Tell mister-big-league-baseball player; a new woman for every night of the week, that he had a son he repeatedly confirmed he didn’t want? How many times have you mentioned in an interview that a family and children wasn’t in your plans? You dare sit here and ask me why I didn’t tell you?” Her ragged breath rushed in and out and she reached up to place a hand over the center of her chest. He saw just how upset she was and it was that knowledge alone that convinced him to stop nagging her.
Although her words stung him like a stake through the heart, she was right. He was mad as hell at her, but he couldn’t blame her for her decision to keep Jacob safe from his father’s media-crazed life. Hell, even Seth feared what the paparazzi would print about him next. Could he really drag an innocent child into that kind of life?
“Are you going to take him away from me now that you know?” Lucy asked in a small voice.
Chris cursed, lunged to his feet and paced away from them to close the door.
“Of course he’s not,” Chris answered succinctly. “Tell her Seth; tell her you wouldn’t do that.”
Seth shook his head, tears forming in his eyes.
“No,” he admitted softly. “I’d never take that child away from his mother. I’d never take him away from you,” he murmured and reached down to take Lucy’s hand in his. “I’m here now and that’s all that counts.”
Chris reclaimed his seat and reached forward to pat Lucy gently on the arm.
“I’m here until the end of February and Amber will be in a few days before the fourteenth,” her brother informed her and Seth felt fear clench in his gut. Were they going to ask him to leave now that he wasn’t needed anymore?
“It’s my off season,” Seth interrupted, hoping to stave off any suggestions he pack up and head off. “I’d like to stay and get to know Jacob a little better.”
Lucy’s eyes went from Seth’s to her brother. She was silently asking him for his opinion and in the end; Chris must have conveyed something because she turned back to Seth and nodded curtly.
“Of course,” she agreed. “I just have one request,” she informed. “You don’t tell him. I made this mess, it’s mine to clean up,” she said.
“I’ll agree, on one stipulation,” Seth rebounded. “I’m here when you tell him,” he said. “I’ve left him high and dry for too long now, it’s time I make it up to him.”
Lucy didn’t respond, she just merely nodded.
Lucy
Almost three weeks later, February the twelfth, Lucy was released from the hospital. She smiled when the nurse pushed her wheelchair out to the pick-up area. There, standing against her mini-SUV, were her three favorite men.
Over the past few weeks Seth had doted on her like a puppy. He’d brought her flowers, red roses with little Valentine hearts dispersed between the blooms, a giant chocolate kiss and a teddy bear that said “Be Mine” with a mournful expression on his cute face. He’d sat and visited with her and then picked Jacob up from daycare and headed home. Chris had merely moved into the hospital room with her, refusing to leave her side for even an hour.
It hadn’t taken long for her to remember just how deeply her feelings for Seth went. She’d kept them on a tight leash for so long, it was difficult having him in her everyday life.
She wanted to reciprocate his affection, but upon hearing what the doctors said about her prognosis, she was glad she didn’t. They were optimistic that the chemo and radiation worked, but they couldn’t promise anything. A relapse was possible. She couldn’t afford to form any new connections. Her time on this earth was iffy at best.
Of course, Chris hadn’t made things any easier. He’d played his buddy up every chance he’d gotten. She knew what he was up to and a small part of her dared to dream of a life with Seth Landers. They’d get married and finally give Jacob the family he deserved; but another part of her rebelled at the mere idea of letting herself or her precious son care for the frivolous playboy.
Although Seth argued, Lucy had asked for paternity tests in order to prove her claim. She refused to have anyone accuse her of being a gold-digger. She knew Jacob was Seth’s son. Seth had been the only man she’d ever been with, but she’d kept that little gold nugget to herself.
“Ready to go home, Mommy?” Jacob asked, his chubby little face alight with happiness.
Lucy smiled in return and waited for the nurse to lock the wheelchair. Pushing herself to stand, she almost laughed when both Chris and Seth raced to offer her a hand. She waved them both away like buzzing gnats and bent to envelope her baby in a hug so fierce she even surprised herself. All the extra physical therapy was paying off and she had gotten some of her strength back.
“You bet I am,” she whispered in Jacob’s ear. “I’ve missed you so much.” She smiled when his little arms tightened around her neck and he buried his face in the hollow of her throat.
“I’ve missed you too,” Jacob responded and then stepped back and smiled up at Seth.
“But Uncle Seth has taken good care of me,” he announced proudly. “He even made me wash behind my ears.”
All three adults chuckled at the little one’s affirmation and Lucy rose, turning a smile on Seth. He stood proud, chest protruding like he’d pitched a perfect game and won the World Series. She had to admit that he’d certainly changed in the past couple weeks. He’d gone from playboy millionaire to daddy-slash-nanny.
&n
bsp; Trusting him with her precious child was simply the most difficult thing she’d ever done. It had been a risk, but she was glad she’d taken it. On impulse, she turned and moved toward Seth, sliding her arms around his waist for a hug.
Her entire body hummed to life when he wrapped his large arms around her still small frame. She owed him much more than he owed her.
“Thank you,” she murmured against his chest. “Thank you for taking such good care of my baby.”
She inhaled sharply when Seth leaned down and nuzzled her ear with his lips.
“Our baby,” he responded and she shivered when his warm breath brushed across her skin.
Chris cleared his throat, obviously recalling their attention back to the here and now. Lucy’s cheeks heated in a school-girl blush. She extracted herself from Seth’s tight grip and turned, motioning toward the car.
“You guys taking me home or what?” she quipped and winked at Jacob. The little boy squealed and climbed in the backseat, scooting over to allow room for her. Seth closed her door and then folded himself into the passenger seat while Chris took the wheel.
“Seatbelts,” Chris called and waited for everyone to comply before putting the car into gear. Her brother’s eyes met hers in the rearview mirror and she didn’t miss the little wink he gave her. She smiled back and nodded, happy and in the same moment, sad beyond belief. She didn’t know how long she had to live and these men were going to be almost impossible to leave.
She made a mental note to speak with Chris about her Will and let her mind wander to all the things she needed to get done. After that, she started building her bucket list.
Seth
Now that Lucy was coming back home, Seth began making plans to get closer to her. He knew she felt their connection when she’d hugged him but convincing her that he could and would provide a good life for them as a family was going to be difficult. She hadn’t trusted him enough to tell him of their son, so he knew he had a lot to prove and he also knew that he was ready.
Chris pulled the car into Lucy’s parking space and killed the engine. Seth immediately got out and opened the door for Lucy. He smiled when her brown eyes widened in surprise. Score one for the Landers’ team, he mused to himself.
Chris extracted Jacob from his booster seat and the little tornado whirled around, pressing himself between Seth and Lucy.
“We have a surprise for you, Mommy,” Jacob declared and took her hand, pulling her toward the curb and the stairs leading to their apartment.
“You do?” Lucy asked in delight.
“Me and Uncle Seth did it,” Jacob boasted. “It was all his idea!”
Lucy looked at Seth and noticed the light blush creeping across his cheeks. She could only imagine what her creative four year old son and manly-man, Seth Landers had come up with to surprise her. She almost feared what it might be. But she allowed Jacob to slowly lead her up the stairs and once they reached their door, he stopped her and stood between herself and the door.
“You have to close your eyes,” the little boy announced.
Seth moved up behind her and pressed his chest to her back, placing his hands on her shoulders.
“I’ll cover Mommy’s eyes and lead her at the same time, that way she won’t fall,” Seth offered and moved his left hand up to gently cover the top half of her face. He wrapped his right arm around her tiny waist and pulled her even tighter against him. Lucy’s breath caught in her throat as his scent filled her nostrils. A pool of moisture bloomed in her core and she summoned every ounce of strength to quell the urge to turn in his arms and claim his lips as her own.
Her body had never reacted to another man the way it did with Seth and it both frustrated and thrilled her. But quickly on the tail of that thought came the reminder that she didn’t have long and couldn’t wrap Seth in a relationship that was doomed from the beginning. No matter how much she loved him, she wouldn’t condemn him to that kind of pain. Sure, she knew he wanted her, but she wasn’t sure how he felt about her.
She heard keys jingling and the sound of the door opening. Seth gingerly nudged her forward, helping her keep her balance and move forward at the same time. He reminded her of the threshold, told her when to pick her feet up and such until they were well into the living room. She inhaled deeply and her body melted like butter.
Home.
She was home and surrounded by the three most important people in her life. What more could a person ask for? If she died tonight, she’d die happy.
“Ready, Mommy?” Jacob asked, his voice coming from in front of her.
Afraid her voice would betray the touching sentimentality of her mood; she merely nodded her head and giggled when Seth struggled to keep his hand over her eyes.
“She’s trying to peek,” Seth accused and laughed, his chest vibrating against her back. It felt good to be in the comfort of his arms and she could almost allow herself to dream of a lifetime of embraces like this. If only she had the time and Seth loved her like she did him.
“Okay, Uncle Seth,” Jacob said in a serious voice. “She can look now.”
Seth tentatively removed his hand and she slowly opened her eyes. Her mouth gaped open when she took in the scene before her. New furniture and a multitude of flowers and Valentine paraphernalia filled her apartment. A new sofa sat against the wall, recliners built in on both ends and a comfy looking lounge chair sat in the corner heading toward the kitchen.
A brand new wooden dining table with four fancy chairs graced her small eating area and a tiny chandelier dangled above it, little diamonds hanging like unshed teardrops. New carpeting, in a beautiful butternut squash color, covered the floor and several side tables sat against the walls.
Tall, elaborate lamps, decked with ornate carvings of angels wrapping around the post sat in most all the corners of her living room and the shades had the small teardrop diamonds to match the chandelier.
“Want to see my room?” Jacob asked his voice high in delight and Lucy couldn’t help but emit a nervous laugh. Her emotions warred between furious that he’d dared refurnish her home – probably discarding her own possessions – without her knowledge or permission and delight that her home looked so comfy and polished. She’d always dreamed of new furniture, especially when it came to her and Jacob’s bedrooms.
She wanted the best for her son, but second-hand had been all she could ever afford.
Seth must have felt her body stiffen because he released her and moved around to stand in front of her. He took a few moments to study her reaction and then immediately began apologizing.
“I’m sorry,” he rushed out. “I can have it all taken back. I had all your old stuff put in storage. I just wanted to do something nice for you and Jacob. Please don’t be upset, I can fix this,” he rambled, running his fingers through his, now, disheveled hair.
Speechless beyond reason, Lucy reached out and placed her hand on Seth’s forearm, stopping him in his tracks. Worry marred his face like a mask.
“It’s alright,” Lucy admitted. “I’m still processing, don’t panic,” she confessed. “I’m just a little surprised, that’s all.”
“Seriously,” Seth took both her hands in his. “If you don’t like any of it, I’ll have it removed immediately. If you want something else, you name it and I’ll get it,” he offered.
“Maybe Mommy would like to sit down?” Chris looked down at Jacob and nodded toward the lounge chair. “She can always see your room after she rests a bit,” he advised when the little boy’s lower lip protruded slightly.
Lucy almost laughed at her son’s expression. Apparently he was very satisfied with his and Uncle Seth’s presentation and wanted her to take it all in – at once. She was tired but making her son happy was first on her to-do list. So, she shook her head and pulled her hands from Seth’s.
“Why don’t you show me your awesome room?” she asked, offering her son her hand. He grabbed her outstretched arm and tugged her toward his door, which she now noticed had his name painted o
n it in big bold letters. What she saw when she walked past the door flat stole her breath away.
The inside of his room looked like a baseball diamond had exploded. His plain little bed had been replaced by a large rectangular home plate with a wooden headboard. His comforter, pillows, sheets and floor rug were all baseball themed and a large poster adorned his far wall. She grinned as she took in the huge picture of Seth Landers in full-on pitching mode.
His color scheme was all St. Louis Cardinals.
“Look at this, Mommy,” Jacob urged and Lucy turned to take in his new chest-of-drawers. Among his normal contents, a few trophies now stood proudly among various little boy toys. Upon closer inspection, Lucy noticed they were actually Seth’s championship trophies; the newest one dated for the Cardinal’s 2011 World Series win.
“Uncle Seth gave them to me,” Jacob bragged. “Aren’t they cool?”
“Very,” Lucy agreed and turned to see Seth standing in the open doorway. She cocked her head and gave him a smirk and he responded with a shoulder shrug. He knew he’d gone overboard, but in the end she couldn’t deny the man had good taste.
“Thank you,” she murmured. “All of this is great, but Seth you didn’t have to do this,” she said and approached him. “You don’t owe us anything.”
Seth looked down at his feet and stuffed his hands in his pockets. Inhaling deeply, he brought those beautiful blue eyes back to her and finally smiled.
“That’s where you’re wrong,” he responded, his voice low and serious. “I owe you both everything.”
***
Seth waited with bated breath while Lucy walked the rest of her apartment. He knew he’d taken a huge risk by refurnishing her home. But he’d wanted to give her something – hell, anything – to account for all the time he’d missed. He couldn’t express how much he admired her.
She’d experienced being pregnant and childbirth on her own. Chris had told him of how her parents had disowned her upon finding out she was pregnant. He’d gotten so angry at the two people who should’ve have been there for her no matter what. But he now understood her reluctance to involve others in her life.
Daddy’s Fiancée Nanny : A Single Dad & A Virgin Romance Page 23
