by Harper Wylde
The sleeves of the shirt were long enough to cover the bracelet even after I folded them several times. I had been correct in thinking that his shirt would hang to mid-thigh. Taking a deep breath, reminding myself that this choice was mine and I was making it to stay in control of my future, I stepped from the bathroom and headed back into the den. The room was quiet, the guys gathered near the back exit murmuring amongst each other. All eyes turned to me as I said quietly, “Let’s do this.”
Sixteen
Damien
Well, fuck me sideways. I tried to remember how to swallow as I stared at Nix standing just inside the doorway to the hall. Killian’s shirt hung on her, teasing me with the curves that were underneath as it brushed against the golden skin of her thighs. The deep green made her skin even richer and added more of a blue sheen to her hair. Adorably, she still had white cotton socks on her feet. It didn’t detract from her appeal by any means. In fact, it made me want to scoop her up and cuddle her.
Holy shit! Theo breathed in my head.
She’s in my shirt. The redundant statement from Killian was a possessive growl.
She’s fucking gorgeous! For once Ryder didn’t have a quip; I could feel his awe as he studied her.
I wonder if she’ll taste like smoke and honey when I lick across those caramel thighs. I nearly choked as Hiro’s thoughts pounded into my head. I always forgot that he was a kinky asshole until he dropped his guard.
She glanced down, checking to make sure all of her assets were covered, then looked back up at us. “What? Did I put it on backwards or something? So help me God, if you tell me this was all a joke I will kill each of you in your sleep.”
I grinned at that while Killian scoffed and opened the back door, motioning her through. “No, it’s not a joke. Come on. The sooner we get out there, the sooner we can get back in here where it’s warm.”
“Fuck!” Nix’s exclamation at the bite of the wind had me shifting between laughter and groaning as I wondered if she’d be loud in bed. I bit down on that train of thought, focusing on what we were about to do.
We entered the clearing and formed a loose circle around Nix. Technically, Ryder, Hiro and I would probably have enough power to force the shift, but with the amount of power coming from Nix that I could feel sizzling between us, it was better to be safe than sorry. Plus, we were a family and we worked together in everything.
Theo stepped forward, giving instructions. “This would be easiest if we touched bare skin, as I said, but as you aren’t comfortable with that, we’ll all place our hands over the sleeves of the shirt. Does that work for you?”
Nix bit her lip and I could tell the decision was hard for her. She really did not like to be touched. “Yes. What’s going to happen?”
Hiro listed what she could expect, his tone calm and reassuring. “It shouldn’t be painful, though it will be mildly uncomfortable. You’re going to feel your creature awaken. She’s going to take control and shift. You’ll still be there but you’ll feel her separately from yourself. She can talk to you, and you to her. When we know what you are, we’ll tell you. You can shift back by asking her to draw back.”
She nodded, taking a deep breath as she held out her arms. She flinched as each of us reached out a hand to clamp around her from shoulder to just below her elbow, two on each side and me slightly behind her. We were very close. I could feel her shaking slightly, her muscles hard and tense as she fought against our touch.
“Relax,” Killian said softly, “you’re going to feel our energies wrap around you. It will tingle and probably make you feel warm.”
“Ok. Just get it over with.” Her voice was raw and I could see the muscles in her jaw clenched tight as she gritted her teeth.
Now. I sent the command to all of them, wanting to hasten the process. As one, we all called on our energy, pushing it at her in waves. I could feel something in her respond, the scent of smoke getting stronger by the second.
“Oh,” she murmured. Then, out of nowhere, she screamed. Long, loud, and raw, as if her skin was being torn from her body. She shrieked and moaned, pulling against our hands.
We all froze, shocked and horrified. She arched against our hands, shrieking in agony. “No! God, it hurts!” The words were pulled from her throat in a raw rasp. Her eyes opened, blank and terrified, obviously not seeing us beside her. “Michael, stop!”
“Who the fuck is Michael?” Killian growled, his face thunderous with rage.
Theo snapped, the command in his voice a hard whip. “Something’s interfering with the transformation. What else did you give her to wear, Killian?”
“Nothing,” he protested, “she just has her socks and my shirt on!”
Hiro scowled as he looked over Nix. “I don’t want to break her trust, but there’s got to be something on her that’s interfering. We can’t stop while she’s only partially transformed. We need to search her to see if she’s wearing anything that could be obstructing her shift! Do it. Now!”
Hiro ran his free hand down the arm he was holding while Theo reached out and ran his palm lightly but urgently across her stomach. At the same time, I ran my fingertips over her back, not feeling anything but smooth skin through the thin material. Killian quickly skimmed over her other arm and a growl ripped up his throat as he used his free hand to rip the material of the sleeve open from wrist to elbow. Her screams got louder, her body rigid from fighting the pain.
“There!” I snapped, pointing to her exposed arm. Nearly the same color as her vibrant skin, a large golden cuff was wrapped around her wrist, extending nearly halfway up her lower arm.
Theo ripped it from her, dropping it on the ground after a cursory sniff. “What the hell is sensitive to gold?” he muttered, more to himself than anyone else.
Her screaming turned to whimpers and suddenly I was wracked with images, all pouring rapidly into my head. Fists flying at me, pain as bones shattered, the bite of a belt or whip as it ripped my flesh from my skin, fingers grasping and groping in tender, private areas as I struggled to push them away. I moaned, the agony leaking from me. My moans were echoed by my brothers all around me as I fought to put a wall up in my head. What the fuck was going on?
When I could breathe again, I glanced around the circle. Hiro’s eyes were dark and full of pity as he watched Nix. She had begun to shimmer, her skin glowing with golden light. The shift was close now that the bracelet was off her wrist. Killian’s face was dark and pissed, he looked close to murder as he ground his teeth together. Theo’s blue eyes were like ice, his lips pressed into a hard line and Ryder’s skin was pale as snow despite the usual olive tone that covered him. What the hell had this girl been through? I couldn’t see a single scar or blemish on her, yet from the memories that had just burned themselves with far too much reality and pain into my brain, she had been tortured.
With a high, trilling noise the glow around her solidified. I felt the silky brush of feathers against my fingertips and released my hand to allow the shift to finish. The light was so bright it hurt my eyes, causing spots to form in my vision. I blinked rapidly to clear them, desperate to see what our girl had become. We hadn’t been knocked backwards so I doubted she was a dragon. As my vision cleared and I saw her for the first time I nearly staggered from the shock.
“Fuck.” My sentiment was echoed by four other loud, breathless voices from my brothers surrounding me.
“Holy shit!” I whirled toward the unexpected voice, a growl rolling up my throat as I stepped in front of Nix. She was still shaking, confused from the shift.
At the edge of the clearing stood Cayden, Barrett, Donovan, and Rini. Rini stepped closer until Donovan held an arm out to block her way. “We heard her screaming from the house. We wanted to make sure you didn’t need backup.” Her shocked eyes met mine as she glanced from Nix to me.
Killian’s voice was a low rumble behind me. “How is this even possible? I thought all of them died out centuries ago.”
Hiro’s voice was strained and co
ncerned, “I don’t think there’s any way to mistake her. She’s a Phoenix, guys. The Council’s going to lose it.”
Seventeen
Nix
Did Hiro just say Phoenix? I’d heard of those, to be sure. Usually red and gold, they were reborn when they died. Well, that explained a fuckload of my past. What it didn’t explain is why the hell my mother hadn’t been reborn or why I had nearly died during that shift.
A soothing presence in my mind washed over me. My Phoenix? I felt an assent from her. Quickly, I analyzed her as I listened to the guys argue with Rini. My Phoenix was stretching now, enjoying the feel of the wind through her feathers. She radiated strength in a way I had never understood. I felt strong, free, wild, nearly invincible. It was as if I had gained another set of senses I hadn’t realized I’d been missing. I felt complete. She fanned her tail feathers in agreement, sending me her feelings of contentment and pride. Hesitantly, I pushed for dominance, wanting to be human again and sort this all out. Without thought, she ceded to my request, allowing heat to enfold me and my human form to reemerge.
“Fuck! Turn around!” I heard Killian spit the command as I straightened. Glancing down I realized that I had lost the shirt in my shift. Killian tugged his shirt over his head, tossing it to me over his shoulder. I caught the soft fabric that was still warm from his body. Surprisingly, the scent from it was strong. Not bad, no, not at all. He smelled like clover and something else. Something that I couldn’t name. Magic, my Phoenix whispered in my mind. Well, that would take getting used to. I inhaled again, letting the scent fill my nose so I would recognize it when I smelled it again.
Once I was covered and before I could think it through, I walked over and kicked Hiro in the shins. Hard.
“What?” he sputtered out, spinning to look at me as the rest of the guys turned as well. I was fuming. I stuck my hands on my hips, my foot tapping a rapid tattoo on the ground.
“It may be a little uncomfortable? Could that have been any more of a fucking understatement? Dude, I thought I was going to be ripped to shreds!” I screamed this up at him, removing one hand from my hip to poke him repeatedly in the chest as I yelled.
His jaw had dropped and he raised his hands, stepping back from me. My Phoenix rolled under my skin, letting out a hissing sound. She was as angry as I was. That had hurt her as much as it had hurt me.
I spun on my heel, yelling at the group as a whole. “Why the fuck didn’t anyone warn me that’d be like putting my tits through a fucking meat grinder? You guys are all fucking assholes! And you, Rini, you didn’t warn me either! What the hell kind of friend does that make you?” The rage I felt was incalculable. I could still see all of the images running through my head like a morbid movie. I could feel the ghosts of pain and I just wanted it all to disappear again.
Ryder let out a strangled noise, bringing his hands up to his mouth. “Did you seriously just say ‘tits through a meat grinder’?” He lost it at that, leaning down to brace his hands on his knees as he cackled with laughter.
I stomped over and shoved him, being sure to muss up his hair as I did.
“Hey!” He shot upright, his hands going protectively to his hair to smooth the style.
Damien stepped forward warily, lifting his hands to show he didn’t mean me any harm. Well, fuck him. He hadn’t warned me either. “Nix, it shouldn’t have hurt. We have no idea why it did. You were wearing that bracelet under your shirt.” He pointed to the ground near my feet. My bracelet! I had been in so much fucking pain I hadn’t even noticed they had pulled it off. I bent to grab it and for some reason my Phoenix hissed.
I paused, looking up at them in confusion. “Why is my Phoenix hissing? It’s just a bracelet.” I looked to Theo, hoping he’d have an answer.
He knelt, careful to stay out of range of my feet, and picked it up. “What is this, Nix?”
I shrugged, crossing my arms across my chest. “It’s just a bracelet. It was my Mom’s. I’ve worn it every day of my life, pretty much. It’s the only thing of hers I have.”
“I’m going to need to run some tests on this,” he said as he eyed me carefully, “do you mind if I borrow it for a little while?”
Huffing, I reluctantly agreed. I didn’t want to be without it. I didn’t remember much of my mother and I had always felt like having something of hers kept her close, but there was no denying that my Phoenix didn’t want it near us. If she wouldn’t let me wear it then I guess I didn’t see the harm in him borrowing it for a little while. “Nothing better happen to it,” I warned.
“I promise I’ll take good care of it, Nix,” he reassured me, running a hand through his hair as he stood.
Wrapping my arms around myself, I glared at everyone standing among the trees. I wasn’t ready to analyze anything yet. I needed a few minutes to calm down. Shifting had brought me something precious, my Phoenix, but it had also unearthed a slew of feelings, memories, and a lifetime worth of hurt and pain that left me feeling unsettled and upset. I could still feel the echo of the searing pain that had hit me during my shift.
“So… the naked person is going back inside. It’s too cold to be out here sans underwear,” I grumbled as I stormed past the group and headed back indoors.
I needed to get back into my clothing. Being naked around all of these hot men was not good for my self control. I might not like to be touched but that didn’t mean I didn’t want to look at them.
I saw Damien smile as I made my way past him. What was his deal?
As I made it to the doorway, I dared a glance over my shoulder and saw all of the guys with smirks on their faces. Were they laughing at me? Suddenly they sobered and I saw Ryder hide a cough behind a closed fist as he cleared his throat. This day was getting weirder by the second.
Yanking the front door open, I fled to the bathroom. The warm indoor air hit my cold thighs, instantly trying to warm them. This new shirt fell to right under my ass and I knew I was showing off a lot of leg. I tried to console myself with the fact that it was nothing they hadn’t seen before. Hell, girls in bathing suits showed more than I was right now. My Phoenix hissed again in my mind. Yeah, that thought didn’t make me happy either. I couldn’t stomach the thought of them checking out other scantily clad women. Whoa. Yeah. My emotions were all over the place.
Gathering my clothing, I realized that my underwear must have shredded during my shift. Fuck. Oh well, I’d have to go without. Stepping into my jeans, I wiggled them up over my hips, zipping and buttoning them into place. Thank God I still had my bra. I pulled my sweater on before realizing that I didn’t have socks anymore either.
A knock on the door had me jumping; I opened the door with a scowl on my face. Rini was standing on the other side looking sheepish while holding out my two missing white socks. Taking a deep breath I realized I needed to apologize to her. I blamed the guys more than I blamed her. Deep down I knew they hadn’t meant me any harm, that the pain I had experienced was as much of a horrifying shock to them as it was to me.
“Look, I’m sorry I lashed out,” I said while I put my socks on. I didn’t want to look at her. She was the one person out of everyone that I needed to have on my side. I had to live with her after all. If I wanted to leave this house never to return, never to see the guys again, I could. Once more, my Phoenix hissed. Jumping from the suddenness of the noise, I cursed. That really was going to take time to get used to.
“Are you ok?” Rini asked, reaching a hand out to steady me but quickly pulling it back once I was stable.
“I’m just not used to hearing anyone—or anything—else in my head.” I pulled my ponytail out and combed my fingers through my hair. I placed a hand over my chest. “I can feel her now,” I said with a little awe in my voice.
“There will be an adjustment period, but soon she’ll be such a part of you that you won’t know how you ever lived without her.”
I had to smile at the irony. Rini had no idea. I would be dead right now, a thousand times over, if it hadn’t been for my P
hoenix. It was a sobering thought and suddenly tears pricked the corners of my eyes. I was not a crier, far from it, but the gravity of that thought had me reaching out in my mind to thank my Phoenix for saving me.
“Nix, are you alright?” Rini asked, sliding a hand over my back in a soothing gesture that instead made me tense. God, I would never be normal. Forcing myself to relax, I nodded as I tried to swallow down the tightness in my throat. Fuck, I wasn’t sure I would be able to talk yet. Clearing my throat I tried to think of things that would make me feel better. Kraken, and unicorns, and magic rabbits, oh my! The side of my mouth quirked up at that thought. Shit, I probably looked like a crazy person in front of my roommate.
“I’m going to be fine. Thank you, Rini. Really.” I moved past her into the hallway. I wondered if having the others around would help center me. I needed to knock off the emotional shit and get my affairs in order. I had questions, more questions than I’d had when I walked in, and I needed answers. I had suspicions and fears brewing that needed to take precedence over my other emotions and thoughts.
