by Anthology
“Rickie, Chloe!” he called.
When there was no response, he forced himself to put his training into practice and quickly assessed whether the cabinet was supporting the fallen wall. If so, moving it would bring the whole mess down on his wife or daughter—whoever was trapped underneath. After confirming that it was safe to move the cabinet, he lifted it away from the wall very carefully so as not to further destabilize the mound of rubble.
Dani shined her flashlight into the darkness of the void. As Rickie turned her beautiful face toward him, blinking at the light, his heart slammed against his chest like a crazed fly against a bright bulb. Her skin was pale and she had contusions on her face and arms. The rest he’d have to examine once they got her out. The important thing was that they’d found her—alive, but quite clearly trapped.
Lying on her stomach with the wall on her back, she inched a hand out to him. “Jamie,” she whispered. “I knew you’d come.” A tear slid down her cheek.
Love for Rickie welled in his heart until he thought he’d drown in it. He gripped her fingers and squeezed gently. “Always,” he said, his voice gruff.
“Chloe?”
Christ. The hope in her voice pierced his heart. He ran his thumb along her wrist. “We’ll find her. Stay still while I get you out of here.” With that, he turned to Dani and nodded. She rose and set off with Coco to continue the search.
He laid his equipment and SCBA on the ground before searching the debris for materials to build a crib under the wall. All he needed was to clear a few inches so he could pull Rickie out. He’d lift the wall, angling it along the length of her body.
After finding a heavy chunk of cement to use as a fulcrum, a section of two-inch wide metal pipe, and several pieces of wood he could use for cribbing, he returned to Rickie. Kneeling beside her, he explained what he was going to do. Normally, leveraging and cribbing was done with several people, but he couldn’t bring himself to call Dani back. As it was, it was killing him not to be searching for Chloe with her.
Standing at Rickie’s head, he cleared out the loose debris and positioned the fulcrum, centering it on the wall. He placed the wood blocks on either side, ready to be pushed into place. The structure wouldn’t be as stable as if he put the blocks on the edges of the wall, but this was the best he could do on his own. “I’m going to lift the wall and put the first layer of cribbing in place. Don’t move.”
He pushed down on the metal pole and, as the wall began to rise, he kicked one of the blocks into place, then the other. Slowly he released the lever until the wall rested on the blocks. A few more layers and he could pull her out. “It’s going great, Rickie. We’re almost there.”
The second layer of blocks went into place easily. The third and final layer would be more difficult to do alone. He wiped the sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand, then bent to position the final set of blocks. Coco’s loud bark pierced the relative silence. The hairs on his arms rose at the fear evident in her ensuing growls. He grabbed his flashlight and whipped it around in time to see Coco dashing away from the common area. He pressed the button on his two-way. “Dani, what’s wrong with Coco?”
“Last time she did this, the quake hit. Take cover, LJ!”
Fuck! He threw himself on the ground so he could see Rickie. “Cover your head, honey. Something’s happening.”
Eyes unbelievably round and white in her dirty face, she asked, “An aftershock?”
“Maybe.”
The floor began to shake. She swallowed and sucked in a sob. “I’m really scared, Jamie.”
The crack in her voice made his heart break. It went against everything he’d ever been taught, but he inched himself forward until he was half under the wall. He rested his head next to hers and held her hands. “We’ll get through this.” And if they didn’t, at least they’d die in each other’s arms.
When the aftershock ended, Jamie stayed where he was but very carefully pressed the button on his two-way. “Team, report.”
Dani came on first. “Looks like Coco’s a good quake alert, LJ. I rewarded her with a treat, and now we’re going back to the search.”
Hollywood’s deep chuckle filled the line. “Next time give us a little more warning, will ya? We’re okay here too, LJ.”
They waited and the line remained quiet. Fuck. Where was Drew? Working with elevators was always dangerous. Add in an earthquake and it was a recipe for disaster. “Drew? Drew? Come in,” he said into the two-way, forcing his voice to remain calm, professional. The last thing he wanted was for the captain or Hollywood to pull him off the mission because his family was involved. Shit. That’s exactly why he needed to stay.
After endless seconds, he heard the familiar cocky tone of Drew’s voice. “Had a bit of a ride when the elevator dropped two floors, but we’re okay now.”
Blood rushed in his ears as Jamie’s chest seemed to collapse in on itself. Christ. A runaway elevator. He dropped his forehead against the ground so Rickie couldn’t read his reaction. So many people he loved were in this building, their lives and welfare his responsibility. Maybe Hollywood had a point after all.
“Rickie and I are okay, too,” he said, once he’d gotten his racing pulse under control.
“Chloe?” Drew asked.
Dani answered. “Nothing yet.”
Silence filled the air as everyone absorbed that statement.
Jamie clicked off his two-way and turned his head in the tight enclosure to kiss Rickie’s tear-drenched cheeks. “Don’t give up,” he said firmly.
Her lips trembling, she nodded.
Carefully, he slid himself out from under the wall. The sooner he finished with Rickie, the sooner he could go find his baby girl.
Feeling punch-drunk, Erica lifted her head as much as she could to watch Jamie at work. He’d jerry-rigged some sort of contraption he called a crib to lift the wall. Seeing him looking so competent calmed her, gave her a sense of security. How he managed to push up the wall with the metal pipe and position the blocks under it at the same time she had no idea. His sheer strength amazed her. Maybe they would get out of this after all.
“Almost done, Rickie. I’ll have you out in a couple more minutes.”
Thank God. She hated that Jamie was stuck getting her free when they should both be looking for Chloe. But maybe she could help move things along.
She kept watch and when he pushed down on the lever to lift up the wall, she rose on her elbows and tried to wiggle her way out.
“No!” Jamie shouted. “Don’t move!”
Why not? She was doing it. She was getting herself out. Pushing to her knees, she hit the wall with her back and lost her balance. She thrust her body forward and her arms clipped one of the cribbing blocks Jamie had set up. Oh, jeez.
The blocks on one side—the side she’d hit—tumbled. She screamed as the wall crashed down onto her arm. Through her tears, she saw that Jamie had somehow managed to jam the tumbled blocks under the wall. His quick action had probably kept her arm from being severed. She tried to speak, tried to tell him she was sorry, but no words would form. If he didn’t hate her before, he’d hate her now.
“Rickie, are you okay? Talk to me,” he said.
“My…” She cleared her throat and tried again. “My arm…” She couldn’t speak as a sob of frustration shook her body.
“Your arm is pinned,” he finished for her. “Why the fuck did you move?”
“I—I wanted to help.”
“Are you sure that’s it?”
With her free hand, she brushed strands of hair out of her eyes. She got that he was upset, but still. “Of course I’m sure.”
“You know what I think,” he said as he picked up a block of cement and moved to the side of the wall parallel to her body. She couldn’t see him now. But she could hear him just fine. “I think you need to trust me for once in your life. I’ve been rescuing people for twelve years. I know what I’m doing here.”
“I do trust you, Jamie.”
> “No you don’t. Not with this and not with Chloe.” He grunted and the wall lifted off her arm. “Can you move your arm? Pull it in next to your body. Slowly.”
She followed his instructions. The fit was tight, but she managed to wiggle her arm free. It throbbed but she could move her wrist and fingers. “I got it.”
“Good. Stay clear. I’m lowering the wall.”
Except for a few inches of dim light ahead of her, she was back to where she’d been when Jamie had found her—trapped in near darkness. “What are you going to do now?”
“We’re at square one again. Sit tight.” Frustration deepened his voice. Come to think of it, she’d heard that tone more and more over the years. When she’d first met him, Jamie had been so light and carefree. He’d always had a joke to make her smile. She’d been so infatuated with him. Couldn’t believe that such a hunk found her attractive. But after Chloe, things had changed. Only he hadn’t. Except now, she couldn’t remember why his sunny disposition had bothered her so much. She loved his smile. And she missed it.
Jamie cleared his throat. “What were you and Chloe doing here anyways? I was sure you were at home by the time the real quake hit.”
She dropped her head onto her uninjured arm and gritted her teeth. Now she remembered. He was amazingly self-centered. “Jamie, you gave me four minutes’ notice. Do you honestly think I had time to pack up all my things before picking Chloe up from the daycare? I barely made it before closing as it was.”
“Sorry.”
“You’re sorry we got caught in the quake, but you’re not sorry you copped out at the last minute. I’m the one who had to dry our daughter’s tears when she learned you weren’t coming. We’re an inconvenience to you, Jamie. Admit it. Once and for all, just admit that you”—her voice cracked but she pushed the words out—“never wanted us.”
“God, babe. That’s so not true. I wanted you and Chloe from day one.”
She laughed, the sound bitter. “If I hadn’t shown up pregnant, we would never have been together. You’d have been perfectly happy with it being a one-night stand. Too bad I wasn’t one of your fire bunnies.”
“Rickie, I was twenty-eight when we met. I was ready to settle down and have a family. The last thing I wanted was another bunny.”
“And see how well that turned out.”
“Cover your head,” he said before the wall lifted a couple inches.
Jamie slipped another block into place and with each inch closer to freedom, the pressure in her chest eased. “You might not be the best husband, but you’re darn good at rescuing people. Thank you.”
He cursed and she heard him suck in a deep breath. From his reaction, you’d think she’d insulted him.
“Look, when this is all over, let’s go to Disneyland. Chloe will love that.”
What the heck? “What are you talking about?”
“We just need a chance to reconnect. To be a family again.”
“This is exactly the problem with our relationship, Jamie. You’re Peter Pan. Will you ever grow up? We’re in the middle of a divorce, and our daughter could be dead. I don’t want to hear about Disneyland!”
As was usual for him, he didn’t say a word. Whenever they argued, he clammed up. Did they mean so little to him that he couldn’t even be bothered to fight? The wall rose again and Jamie pushed another block under it on each side of the lever.
His continued silence was getting to her. Why hadn’t he disagreed with her comment about Chloe? Since this all began, he’d been a steady stream of reassurances.
Jamie crouched down and gripped her under her armpits. She kept her gaze on his face as he pulled her free, searching—and not finding. When she was kneeling in front of him, she forced herself to put into words the thought that was cutting a hole in her heart. “You think she’s dead.”
His eyes met hers. They gleamed in the soft glow of the emergency lights. He didn’t speak, but his silence told her everything. Everything she’d hoped never to hear. A shudder tore through her. Her teeth started to chatter and great sobs wracked her body. Jamie pulled her against his warm chest and wrapped his strong arms around her, his face buried in her hair.
“She’s not dead,” he murmured. “I’d know if she were. I’d feel it in my heart.”
She wished she could believe him—she needed to believe him. Her heart burned, torn in two. They’d had so little time together, so little time with their daughter. And now it was too late. With that last thought, she slumped against him. She’d have fallen if he hadn’t been holding her so tightly.
Through her cries, she heard his radio crackle and Dani say the three sweetest syllables: “I’ve found her.”
Chapter 4
Jamie leaned back and ducked his head, turning slightly away from Rickie before speaking into the two-way. “Is she…?” His voice broke and he clamped his mouth shut.
“I can’t get to her. I’m sending Coco in with a headset. If she’s conscious, maybe we can talk to her. Let her know we’re coming,” Dani said.
He swallowed and forced himself to keep his hopes in check. “Keep me posted. Rickie’s free now. I’ll be there in a couple minutes.”
Rickie pulled on the sleeve of his turnout coat. “How is Chloe? What did Dani say?”
“She’s located her but can’t reach her yet. Let’s get you outside and then I’ll go help Dani.”
A cloud descended over her features. Her eyes shot sparks and her hands went to her hips. As usual, his beautiful wife was preparing a mutiny. He held up a hand to stop her, but she wasn’t having any of it.
“Jamie Caldwell, you’re crazy if you think I’m leaving without my daughter.”
Christ he missed her, missed the gentleness of her touch, the softness of her skin. His body tightened at the memories. Shit. This was not the time and place to indulge his fantasies.
Just one touch.
Giving in, he stretched out his hand to stroke her face, but she swatted it aside and flinched when her injured arm collided with his wrist. He dropped his hand and shook his head. What had he been thinking? That everything was forgiven and forgotten because he’d pulled her out from under a wall? Well, yeah. “Babe, listen. You’re just going to get in the way.”
She leaned forward, her features hard. “I’m. Not. Leaving.”
“You can trust me with this. I’ll get Chloe out of here even if I die trying.”
Her breasts lifted as she blew out a sigh. “There you go again with this trust thing. What is your problem?”
“I know you don’t trust me, and a part of me doesn’t blame you.” He sat her down on the cement block and opened the small first aid kit he’d brought up.
When he swiped the antiseptic over the cut on her wrist, she winced and rubbed her forehead. “Am I hurting you?”
“Not physically.” He frowned and she waved her words away with a flick of her hand. “Why do you think I don’t trust you?”
He ripped open the packaging of a bandage with a little more force than necessary. The gauze fell to the ground. Cursing, he got another and forced himself to slow down. “Because you never have.” When she opened her mouth to speak, he put his fingers against her lips before continuing, his voice rough with pent-up frustration. “After I got back from Indonesia, you stopped trusting me. You wouldn’t let me give my daughter a bath. When I tried to feed her, you’d take away the spoon. Later, you wouldn’t even let me read her a bedtime story. And now”—he slapped a piece of medical tape over the gauze—“you barely ever let me see her.”
“That’s not it. We just have a different routine now.”
“Now that you’re on your own,” he finished, stepping back.
She pulled her sleeve over the bandage and kept her eyes lowered. “Yes.”
Anger filled his chest. “There isn’t room for me in your lives. You’ve made sure of that.”
She dragged her gaze up to his face. “I didn’t know you felt this way.” She paused and brought a finger to her chin. “W
hy didn’t you ever say anything about it? Oh right.” Her voice hardened and she poked her raised finger into his chest. “Because you were never around long enough.”
Jamie grabbed her hand. When she tried to pull it away, he brought it to his lips and kissed her fingers. Rickie was so strong and independent, but the two traits he loved most about her were the very ones keeping them apart. She was right. He hadn’t resisted her efforts to neatly package their lives, to make him somewhat extraneous. He hadn’t had the heart. He’d watched the worst happen too many times. Watched his fellow firefighters die, and watched their too-dependent wives fall apart and lose themselves, destroying their families. Just like Rickie’s mother had.
“If something happens to me, you and Chloe will be fine.” Business as usual. He took comfort in that. But what if you don’t die, dickhead? You’ve given up your life, your family, for something that might never happen.
As the words bounced around his head, Rickie pounded her free fist on his chest. Tears spilled from her eyes. “Shut up!” she cried. “Just shut up!”
He knew what this was really about—him dying on the job. He let go of the hand he’d been kissing and gripped her arms. “Calm down, Rickie.”
“I don’t want to calm down,” she sobbed as her fists continued to rain down on him. She wasn’t hitting hard enough to hurt him physically, but his heart was breaking.
He pulled her tightly against him, capturing her hands between them. “Shh,” he murmured. “Everything will be all right.”
He continued to rub comforting circles on her back, but with each passing minute, he believed his reassurances less and less. And that’s when he heard the most wonderful sound in the world—his little girl’s voice. “Daddy? Daddy? Are you there?”
His heart thrashing in his chest, he let go of Rickie and stood before he pressed the talk button. His throat constricted and he had to push past the tightness. “Chloe, baby. It’s Daddy. Are you hurt?”
“I-I’m scared,” she hiccupped, her voice raw from crying.
Rickie listened, her face ashen.
