by N. P. Martin
I nodded. "What are they?"
"Case reports." She randomly selected one of the folders, took it out and handed it to me. Inside the folder there appeared to be a typed report of a case that she had worked on in December of ’94. I only briefly scanned the report, but it detailed an account of how Eva had tracked down a demon that was invading the homes of families and getting them to turn against each other…with murderous results. "That demon was responsible for the deaths of seventy-two people, and would’ve claimed more lives had I not stopped it."
I looked at the rows of folders again. "So these are all detailed accounts of the cases you’ve worked on?"
"Yes, every one since I finished my training, and in almost every case, lives were saved, and more death was prevented."
"There must be hundreds of files here," I said in awe.
"Exactly." She was looking at me, clearly waiting on me making the connection.
"I get it. You’ve saved a lot of lives."
"Not just me, but Frank as well, and your mother, and every other Watcher out there, including you, Leia. You helped Frank stop that demon last night, thus preventing the senseless loss of many more lives."
"And all it took was for my best friend to die as well."
Eva nodded like she understood what I was feeling, though I highly doubted she did. "What happened with your friend was unfortunate," she said. "No one could’ve predicted that outcome. This is why Watcher’s in general stick to their own. We can’t afford to be dragging other’s into a war they know nothing about, and aren’t equipped to fight if they did."
"So we just sacrifice everything for the greater good, is that it?"
"It’s not as bad as it sounds. As Nephilim, we have a role to play in making sure the world is safe from evil, so everyone else can live in relative safety and security." Her eyes focused on me, as if she wanted to make sure I understood. "We get to live with a purpose that most people could only dream of. We are servants of the light, and we get to operate at our full potential. How many can say that?"
"I get it," I said, leaning on the edge of the desk. "I really do. I don’t even disagree with you on any of it. Since I’ve come into this life, I’ve started to feel like I’m doing something important, something only I and a small number of others can do. I appreciate the purpose it gives me, but…"
"You miss your friend."
Tears welled up in my eyes as I stared at the floor. "Yes."
Eva came and sat next to me on the desk. "The pain will pass, and your friend will always be with you."
"Yeah, she’ll probably haunt me for being such an asshole."
"Why do you blame yourself? As I understand it, your friend turned up out of the blue."
"She did, but only because she saw me with Frank and followed us into that building." I sighed and shook my head, the guilt still gnawing ceaselessly at me. "If I’d told her about what was going on, and what I was involved with, she would’ve known to stay away. She’d still be alive then."
Eva shook her head as if I was wrong on that. "You don’t know that. You friend sounds very tenacious, she probably would’ve followed you into the building anyway, whether she knew what was happening or not."
I shrugged. "Maybe."
Eva put a hand on my leg. "You just lost your best friend, Leia. Don’t compound matters by blaming yourself. After all, by keeping her in the dark, you were only trying to keep her safe. I would’ve done exactly the same thing."
That didn’t make me feel any better, but I appreciated the sentiment. "Thanks, Eva."
She smiled then as she went around the other side of the desk and opened a drawer. "You might find these interesting," she said, placing what looked like a photo album on top of the desk.
I went around and stood beside her as she opened up the thick photo album to the second or third page. There were three photographs on the page, and they drew my attention immediately. "That’s…my mom," I said, pointing at a photo of my mother, in which she stood with three other people, namely my father, Frank and Eva. All of them seemed very young, maybe my age or a little older. They were all smiling as well, though a little nervously in my father’s case. It had been so long since I’d looked at a photo of him, I was almost shocked to see him. Standing beside Frank, I could see he was a couple of inches taller, and his features were softer than Frank’s, kinder. He never lost that kindness either. As for my mother, only one word described her: hot. Her hair was long and lustrous, her eyes bright and full of confidence.
"I hope you can see now why I give you strange looks from time to time," Eva said. "That might as well be you in that photograph."
"Where was this taken?" I asked her.
"The Warren. It was our first day there."
"My mom didn’t say much about the place in her journal. What was it exactly?"
"What is it, you mean? It still exists, though it isn’t used anymore."
"Where is it?"
"Underneath the Mason Cathedral on James’ Avenue." Eva proceeded to show me various pictures of the Warren, which seemed to consist mostly of large concrete rooms filed with all manner of training equipment. "It’s basically a huge underground bunker, split into five different levels, with corridors branding off everywhere, hence the name, the Warren. It used to be the center of operations for the Watcher High Council, which is no longer in existence."
"Why not?" I asked.
She smiled somewhat and shook her head. "Let’s just say it was corrupted from within. If you want details, ask Frank. He’s the one who brought it down."
I couldn’t help laughing. "Really? That figures."
"I helped him, of course. It had to be done. Much was at stake. You remember the terrorist attack of ’07?"
I nodded. "Vaguely, yeah. Didn’t terrorists poison the city water supply with drugs or something, making everybody see weird shit?"
Eva smiled and shook her head. "That’s not what happened. A giant demon was actually running amok in the city. The government covered it up, as they do with anything relating to the supernatural."
"Doesn’t surprise me. Who stopped the demon? Wait, let me guess…"
"Frank."
"Of course. A regular action hero is my uncle Frank, it seems."
"He believes in what he’s doing, in what we’re doing." She folded her arms and sat on the edge of the desk. "That’s why he was able to take down the Council in the face of stiff opposition, though at the cost of some very dear friends."
"So Watcher’s have no ruling body anymore?"
She shook her head. "No, and that’s the way Frank likes it. He always did have a problem with authority."
"I take it from your tone that you disagree."
"I believe that we’re more effective when we are organized properly. As it stands, our number’s are low and scattered, with every Watcher apparently doing their own thing."
"I’m surprised you haven’t reformed the Council yourself," I said. "You seem like you’d make a good leader."
She smiled. "Thank you. I have tried, but no one appears to be interested, and I can’t do it alone. Most Watchers are stubborn bastards who don’t like being told what to do."
I couldn’t help but laugh. "Well then, I guess that means I’m in good company."
Eva laughed as well. "It would seem so, yes."
"Still," I said. "I’d be happy to help you out, once I get my brother back, that is."
"We’ll get him back. Don’t worry."
"We’ll? Are you helping now?"
"I’ve been helping."
"Oh. Frank didn’t say that you were."
"No, he wouldn’t." She shook her head as if she wasn’t surprised. "Anyway, the demon behind this whole kidnapping ring, or whatever it is, is doing a very good job at staying hidden and covering his tracks. I’m hoping that now that we know his name, that we might be able to find out something about him."
"Frank’s demon friend, Lucas, told us that Abigor is the worst of the worst, even for a
demon," I said. "I’m really not sure if…I’m not sure I’m going to be able to save my brother." It was a sentiment I hadn’t been able to shake since the meeting with Lucas, but this was the first time I’d vocalized it, and it felt awful to do so.
Eva placed her hand over mine on the desk. "I can’t imagine what you’re feeling right now, Leia, especially with everything else that has happened. I can promise you one thing, though."
I looked into her deep green eyes. "What’s that?"
"Frank and I, we won’t stop until we find your brother." She squeezed my hand. "And neither will you."
I nodded as I gave her a darkly serious look. "You’re right about that," I said.
Eva smiled. "Good girl."
24
Before Frank returned, Eva handed me a photo of my parents, taken before they were married, when they were just a few years older than I am now. The photo was taken at some concert, Eva said she couldn’t remember which one. My parents looked happier than I’d ever seen them, both smiling and clearly in love. The picture made me smile, and made me think of better days. "You can keep that," Eva told me.
"Thank you," I said in return. "And thank you for…the talk, I guess. I appreciate it."
Eva smiled as she laid both hands on my shoulders. "You’re a strong girl, Leia, just like your mother was. Whatever happens, you’ll get through it, and Frank and I will be here to help whenever you need it. You’re one of us now, and we look after our own."
I felt like pointing out the irony of that last part, given that no one "looked after" me or Josh before now, but I could see she was trying to be nice, so I kept my mouth shut and gave her a smile.
Frank returned ten minutes later, seemingly happy to see me up and around again. After he thanked Eva for her assistance, we both left for the cabin.
The first thing I did when I got back was grab a shovel, go outside, and start digging a grave for Kasey. It wasn’t something I thought I would ever have to do in my life, but then I’d had to do a lot of things lately that I never thought I would ever have to do, like stab my best friend in the back, literally, and maybe figuratively as well.
It wasn’t my fault.
It didn’t matter how many times I told myself, it wasn’t enough to convince me that I wasn’t to blame for Kasey’s death. I didn’t think I would ever stop blaming myself.
Frank joined me by the edge of the woods with another shovel, offering to help. "No," I said as I dug into the hard ground.
"It’s going to take you a while," Frank said. "It would be quicker if—"
"I said no, Frank!" I stopped digging to stare at him. "I just…I just need to do this by myself, that’s all."
Frank nodded. "Okay, I understand."
I went straight back to digging, using the edge of the shovel to slice through the many tree roots in the ground.
Frank turned and left then, but arrived back a few minutes later carrying what could only be Kasey’s corpse wrapped in a white sheet. I could only stare at the bundle as he carefully placed it on the ground not far from the gravesite.
"I’m going to leave you alone for a while," he said. "I have some business in the city, so I’ll be gone for a few hours, maybe longer. When I get back, we can talk about summoning Abigor."
I nodded, hardly hearing him as I continued to stare at the body of my friend. "Okay," I said in a quiet voice.
Frank went to walk away, then stopped and turned around. "You sure you’re going to be all right? I can stay if you want me to."
"No." I shook my head. "Just go do what you have to do, Frank."
Frank nodded, then walked away, and I went back to digging.
It didn’t take me as long as I thought it would to dig a grave deep enough to put Kasey in. After Frank left, I directed all my anger and other boiling emotions into the shovel. By the time I’d finished digging, my face was flushed and covered in sweat, and I realized my grace was flowing freely through me, which I guess explained why the grave was dug so quickly.
To catch my breath, I sat on the grass for a while, right next to Kasey’s body as I deliberated peeling back the sheet to look at her face. On the one hand, I wanted to properly say goodbye to my best friend. But on the other hand, I knew that if I did, my last memory of her face would most likely crop up in my nightmares forever after, just a dead mask without the life I once knew in it.
In the end, I shook my head and peeled back the sheet, because despite my trepidation, I needed to see her one last time. When I revealed her face, I involuntarily gasped a little, shocked by how different she looked. Her skin was now ashen gray, her once ruby red lips almost blue. Worst of all was her closed eyes, which I knew would never open again. I just couldn’t believe that her spirit had gone, and that I was merely looking at an empty, decaying shell. In life, she was so alive, so full of spunk and spirit.
I sat for a long time—past dark—before I was able to lift Kasey’s body and place it into the grave I had dug. Then I sat for another while, just staring down at the white bundle, wondering how my life had come down to this; to the point where everything was suddenly a matter of life and death; to the point where people I loved and cared about could die so readily, until the blaring indicator present in the loss of my parents reminded me that it had already come down to this, before Kasey came along. Then after a while, I decided it didn’t matter how I got here. What mattered was where I went from here.
Without Kasey.
And possibly without Josh.
Eventually, I forced myself to start filling in the grave, covering Kasey’s wrapped body until it seemed like the ground itself had swallowed up her remains.
Then, as I was scattering the last of the soil over the grave, I heard a voice behind me that made me freeze.
"The things we have to do, eh, Sis?"
No, it can’t be…
But as I slowly turned around, I saw that it was.
"Josh?" I said as I let the shovel fall to the ground, wondering belatedly if it was the wisest thing to do; and then scolding myself for having the thought. Although, I couldn't deny that despite our twin bond, my grace was still reacting to his presence.
He stood there dressed in some sort of black military type uniform. His dark eyes shone nefariously in the moonlight. "Surprised to see me, Sis?"
Once I got over the shock, my surprise turned to suspicion. Without thinking, my hand reached down for the Watcher Knife sheathed to my right leg. I took the knife out and held it with the blade pointing down, ready to use it if I had to. "How do I know its you and not some demon?"
Josh laughed at that as if he found it hilarious. Then he stopped laughing and glared at me with pitch black eyes that caused my grace to intensify within me, even more than it already had. I was gutted to think that over the course of just several weeks, my own brother had become someone (or something) which not only aroused my grace, but on some metaphysical level, caused it to strengthen. How can that be? "Oh, Sis, can’t you see? I’m already a demon."
I shook my head in deep sadness, exasperated that my instincts were now being confirmed by his words, not even sure what to say to him, saddened further that uncomfortable silences would become a part of our relations forevermore. Was this really my brother? I mean, was it really him talking and acting like this, or was it his new demon side? Was it that whatever dark magic Abigor had worked on Josh, was now calling the shots, or was it that Josh was just using his new power to finally be himself? My greatest fears, and my newfound compass for such things, seemed to be in accordance with one another
Then I remembered my mother’s words to me in the video. "Josh will try to run from who he is, which will leave him open to darkness…"
I refused to accept that Josh knew what he was doing, that he was somehow still in control of his actions. My brother just wouldn’t act like this, despite what my mother said.
"You don’t know me, Leia," he said, coming forward slightly. "You think you do, but you don’t. Not really."
I
stared at him as if he had somehow read my mind, and this was his answer to my concerns. "What do you mean, Josh? I know you better than anyone."
"Then why do you seem so rattled?" He smiled, his eyes now back to normal. "I’ll tell you why. It’s because you know what I’m saying is true."
"No," I said, shaking my head, pointing the knife at him. "No! This isn’t you, this—"
"Wake up, Leia!" He almost screamed it at me, and then he rushed in and disarmed me of the knife in the blink of an eye. There was no way I could’ve stopped him even if I’d tried. He had demon speed, which was just one more thing to replace the brother I thought I knew. But the second he touched the knife, it seemed to glow for a second, and he soon dropped it like it was red hot, hissing in pain as he did so.
"It doesn’t like demons," I said sarcastically.
He threw me a look. "Sounds like you have quite the fucking bond, Sis."
I sighed then and shook my head. "The Josh I know wouldn’t act like this."
"You’re right," he said as he kicked the Watcher Knife away with his boot. "The Josh you knew wouldn’t act like this. The Josh you knew would probably still be running after his twin sister, sorting out her messes, fighting her battles, all while she treated him like a kid who needed telling what to do, and all while she remained so wrapped up in herself that she didn’t even see what was right in front of her face all along."
"This isn’t you…"
He shook his head in annoyance. "Jesus, still with the denial. That was always your problem, Leia, you believed your own bullshit in the face of all the evidence to the contrary. For instance, you believed our mother loved us when she didn’t."
"What? Of course she loved us, Josh, she was our mom."
"She loved you, Leia, not me." He sounded bitter when he said it. It was a bitterness I recognized because I’d heard it from him before.
I just didn’t want to admit it to myself.
"She was as much your mom as mine," I said, knowing whatever I said would fall on deaf ears, as he had clearly made his mind up about the matter. A long time ago it seemed.
