by Nhys Glover
Prior staggered like a drunk over to the cushions and collapsed onto one, sloshing wine out of his goblet as he did so. I felt momentarily sorry for him. It had taken me days to get my head around the enormity of what we faced. I was expecting him to do it in moments.
“I would have come back. If necessary, I will be part of your harem. But in name only. I cannot bed you.”
“And why not? Am I so ugly to you?” All right, so my pride was badly dinted. I was a woman, after all. I might dress like a lad, but my feelings were all female.
He laughed. “You may dress like a lad but you are as vain as any lass. Does it have to be all about you? Am I not free to choose who I bed?” That he mirrored my own thoughts at least in part shocked me, and I was momentarily put off.
I drew my scattered thoughts together and pressed on. “Is it because your heart is already given to another? That could–”
“No. No lass has a claim on me. And before you ask, it is not because I prefer men. I love no one and will share my bed with no one. That is my decision. My right!”
I flopped down beside him, sloshing more wine on the richly decorated carpet. I didn’t really notice. “Look, I understand. I do. Before Airsha spoke the Goddess’ Will and told me what I was expected to do, I never planned to have sex. Or if I did, it would only have been with my best friend. Zem. You met him the other night. Do you have any idea how daunting the idea of satisfying four men is? Airsha does it by taking all her men to bed at once. But my mind spins every time I even imagine doing something like that. With strangers!” I shuddered to make my point. “But I’m trying. Because more than my fragile ego or body is at stake here. I don’t think any of us has the option to say no. Airsha said I could, at the start, when I was panicking. But I know now she was only saying that to placate me.”
“You don’t understand. It’s not a preference. I will kill you if I bed you!”
I drew back at his vehemence and was glad Zem wasn’t there. He’d have gone into warrior-mode after hearing that threat. But somehow I didn’t think it was a threat. Why couldn’t I read his thoughts? It would make things a lot easier.
“Look, I think we need to leave this for a better time. We have to find Laric. This is the first sighting there’s been of him in half a sun. Will you stay here while I find Darkin?”
He shrugged and stared into his wine, anger seething just below the surface. “I have nowhere else to go.”
I clambered inelegantly to my feet and hurried to where I knew I’d find Darkin. He’d be at the Command Post. He and the generals were preparing for an all-out attack on the Cliffling settlements in a last ditch effort to find this tunnel into the mountains referred to on the map the Devourers had.
In my head, I wasn’t thinking about that attack or about Prior. I kept seeing the other face that haunted my nightmares. Airshin, the rapist, was one. Laric, the betrayer, was the other. How could the Goddess have chosen that bastard as part of The Five? Was she determined to make this task as hard as it possibly could be for me? Why not bring Airshin back from the dead and make him part of The Five too?
Gods!! I screamed in my head.
By the time I returned to Airsha’s apartments Darkin already had an airling rider in the air, sent to alert the troopers on the ground in Southairshan of the renegade Laric’s sighting.
The troopers already knew to beware of his hands, but now they were being told to bring him in uninjured. I hoped the latter was impossible to obey. Every man and woman who fought for the Goddess knew of the man who tortured her with nightmares that almost drove her mad and nearly succeeded in keeping her from the final battle. No one was sympathetic to him. No one would take special care when taking him into custody.
When Zem and Landor came in a little later, all jokes and back-slapping, they did a double-take at the door. They saw Prior lounging lazily on the cushions, stuffing his mouth with a pile of delicious delicacies. Seeing our missing member so comfortably ensconced would have taken anyone aback.
Though Landor hadn’t met Prior, he’d been given a description of the man. And there weren’t too many men in the Airshan Capital who looked like him—muscular, barrel-chested and black as night.
It was like watching street wadjas taking each other’s measure. Prior saw them, put down his plate and stood, balancing himself squarely on his widely spread legs, his hands swinging loose at his sides. His head was cocked at an odd angle, as if taking in his competition out of the corner of his eye, rather than full on.
“You’re back. Thrown your lass over, have you?” Zem said, by way of introduction.
“There was no lass. I was just not prepared to have sex with your woman. I would think you’d be grateful I did not choose to show her what a real man is like in bed.”
Oh, no. This was not happening!
“Stop this now! May I remind you that we are supposed to be a team. If we end up killing each other we can’t save the world. So put your cocks away and stop measuring their size. I’m sure you are all equally well-endowed. We have far more important things to contend with.”
It surprised me, but my words seemed to have an effect. Zem and Prior visibly shrank. I would never have thought puffed up muscles could make such a difference. Interestingly, Landor had remained an observer through it all, though I didn’t get a sense that he feared Prior. More that he was taking his measure in ways that had nothing to do with male posturing and aggression.
“Like what?” Zem barked at me. Then shook himself, remembering who he was talking to. He was livid that Prior had pranced back into our lives. It was true, he’d hoped he was gone for good.
“Laric is number five.” I said simply.
Zem’s mouth dropped open, and he shook his head from side to side over and over again. “No, absolutely not. That bastard betrayed his brothers and nearly killed our Goddess. He was responsible for Trace’s death! He’s getting nowhere near you! How could we ever trust him to have our backs?”
“Really, I didn’t know that, Zem! Why don’t you tell me again so I can understand exactly why I should hate the man who features so spectacularly in my nightmares! Without him using his magic on me!”
Landor stepped in and placed a calming hand on my shoulder. If it had been anyone else, I would have shaken it off in fury. But Landor had a way of calming me, much as Spot did. It was a little to do with his healing magic and a lot to do with what he’d been through in his life. Nothing got to him, and that made me want to be like him. So I leaned my head against his shoulder and took several deep breaths.
“I heard Trace died. I didn’t know Laric was responsible,” Prior said, almost apologetically.
“Laric turned you all in. We got away but a stray arrow caught Trace during the escape. He died in my arms.” I couldn’t hold back the sob that arose from deep inside me. I thought I had come to terms with Trace’s death. It wasn’t as though I had known him well. But having been inside his mind and understood just how much he loved Airsha... His death had felt unfair. A tragic loss. And something I would never forgive Laric for.
Landor had his arm around me now and Zem had moved in behind me, nuzzling my neck.
“I liked Trace. It surprised me that he shifted so quickly to the enemy’s side. I was ready to do it long before then, but Trace always seemed the loyal type. He believed the Godling would one day make him legitimate. I was never that gullible.”
“How do you know Laric is one of us?” Zem challenged, even as he rubbed against my side like Spot would have done. It surprised me that he didn’t feel the need to break up the embrace I was sharing with Landor. In the last few days these two had become close friends.
“I was following Laric in the marketplace, preparing to take him down. I paid particular notice of his hands, for obvious reasons. That’s how I spotted the mark. I nearly lost him, I was so shocked.”
“And he knows about The Jayger. And the key or circle over the sea.” I filled the other two in as I pulled myself together.
&nbs
p; “He’ll be here soon. They’ll catch him,” I assured them, though it was more to assure myself.
“I think we need to join the search. He might not run from us if he sees our mark,” Landor said thoughtfully.
“He saw mine. It only made him fight harder to break free. I have never seen anyone so scared. And it had nothing to do with facing charges of treason and betrayal. He knows what this Jayger is and what it will do. And he may know his destiny is to fight it.”
“So he’s running like you did,” Zem said, unable to miss shooting another verbal dagger at our fourth.
“Do you want her dead? Are you in such a hurry to lose your pretty woman?” Prior demanded furiously, stepping in so he was in Zem’s face. That placed me in the middle. Prior in front, Zem behind and Landor to one side boxing me in.
It was the oddest sensation. I knew Zem and Prior were close to exploding. I knew I was all that stood between them, literally, and yet I suddenly felt shielded, safe... and aye, aroused by the male bodies pressing in on me.
They must have picked up my change in mood. Does a woman’s scent change when she’s aroused? I didn’t know. But suddenly Prior’s nostrils flared and he looked down at me as if seeing me properly for the first time.
They were such a contrasting bunch. Landor tall and slim and so startlingly white; Zem shorter and slightly more muscled and brown; Prior shorter again and broad across the chest, making him look twice the size of the others, and very black; and me, not a short woman—but still shorter than all of them, even Prior—boyish figured, with bright red hair and freckles. We looked like a handful of the assorted candies childlings got on a godsday.
“No. You cannot consider this. I will kill you.” Prior said on a groan, as if he was physically in pain. I saw his tongue snake out to wet those beautifully formed, full lips.
Oh, that was not what Prior needed to say! I suddenly pulled out of my sexual haze to register his words.
The fist flew so fast I didn’t see it. Prior sure didn’t. He reeled back and took down the trestle table where the food was laid out. The crash was loud enough to have Airsha rushing in from the other end of the apartment.
“Never threaten her again. I will end you if you do!” Zem snarled.
It was my turn to place a calming hand on Zem’s shoulder “He wasn’t threatening me. He means he’s afraid he’ll kill me. During sex? Is that it? Something to do with your fire?” I looked at the fallen man, trying to make sense of what I was seeing.
Prior got slowly to his feet, brushing off the food that stuck to his tunic and breeches. “I do not wish to discuss it. Know only that it is impossible for me to fully participate in this bond.”
When Zem made to say more, I stilled him. I’d got it now, all of it, and I was horrified—sorry for Prior and frightened for myself. He was right, he could kill me. He’d done it before, more than once, and it was a terrible death.
“We need more airlings. If we’re to join the search for this key or circle... all of us... we have to be able to move fast,” I said, suddenly looking at Airsha who was studying the destruction with dismay and a little fatalism.
“I can put out a call. Some of those who fought with us might be willing to join you for a while. The Goddess would certainly approve,” Airsha said only half paying attention.
“You need to rest, Prior. As do we all. I think we’ll be heading south as soon as we get updated information,” I said, taking Prior’s arm and leading him down the hall to the one remaining spare room in the royal apartment.
When I came back my sadness had both Landor and Zem moving in close to soothe me. “I’m all right. But it is tragic.” I wondered briefly if I was invading his privacy by sharing what he was not willing to share. But the other two needed to understand, particularly in light of our bond.
I left the mess and Airsha and led the two men into the room I shared with Zem. We piled onto the bed and sat close, me in the middle. Zem stroked my arm, while Landor stroked my hair. I wasn’t sure why they both felt the need to comfort me. I wasn’t the one who was hurting.
“He was always filled with anger, right from a young age. I don’t know why. I think that’s something he’s locked down pretty tightly. When he was thirteen he fell in love with a girl in his town. He comes from Highlund like you, Zem. You might be related. His father was a magical son. A legitimate one, as your father was. That makes them half-brothers and you and Prior cousins.
I could hear Zem’s impatience and I nodded. “I know, I know. I’m getting to it. Give me time.”
I took a couple of deep breaths. “His magic came in on the night he and his lass made love for the first time. It exploded out of his hands as he touched her naked body and she was incinerated almost instantly. Even though he was so close, he received no burns. He never does from his own fire. Which is typical for fire mages.
“His parents contacted the priests, and of course he was labelled an abomination, a mistake of nature. His parents thought he was being taken away for castration. He wished that had been the case. Instead, he was enlisted into the secret army. At least there he was taught how to control and use his fire. But when he lost his temper or when passion claimed him, so did his fire. Several of his fellow youths-in-training suffered serious burns when sparring with him.
“He met another girl when he was nearly finished his training. He’d become better at control. He was arrogant enough to think he had his fire under his control. And though he tried to warn the girl of the danger she was putting herself in, she was adamant she trusted him. And he did try to control his magic. So much so that at first he couldn’t get an erection. But when she tempted him by dropping to her knees and placing him in her mouth, he quickly got interested. He lost control and he roasted her. Her screams still haunt his dreams.
“It was covered up, of course. As were all his kills for the Godling. He was tasked with killing the Godling’s enemies that way. And every one took a little of his soul. I don’t blame him for not joining the war. We would have had him blasting our enemies just as the Godling had.
“That poor man can’t even pleasure himself without starting a fire. No amount of mental control helps. It’s a physical thing. Arousal heats the fire in his blood. Fury or sexual arousal both do the same thing. We were lucky he was keeping his fury managed in there or the whole place could have gone up when you punched him, Zem. He’s terrified and feels very alone. It’s been better since he was given productive work in Highlund but now he feels... trapped.”
We sat like that for a long time, contemplating Prior’s story and what it meant to our supposed bond. I could see me loving him. It had already started. But would a platonic bond be enough? Would companionship be enough? It might. He was sorely lacking friendship and genuine caring. Not even his family had loved him enough not to abandon him. I often thought the way families betrayed their sons when they found out they were abominations was the cruellest of blows. To be rejected for something they had no control over, something other young men, born to the Godling, were respected and honoured for. It wasn’t fair! There had been so much that was unfair about the old regime. The new one might have its issues, but those cruelties, like castration and human sacrifice, were no longer condoned.
I don’t know when we settled down to sleep, fully clothed and together. But it seemed natural. We had become three, while the other remained so horrifyingly separate from us because of his magic.
Chapter Eighteen
I came to wakefulness the first time, hearing Landor’s deep, smooth voice comforting me. For a moment, I wondered why. He knew it wasn’t me who needed comforting but Prior.
But then the memory surged up and I knew the answer. It was the dream of Airshin, and yet again I was being held down and raped in that back alley. But Landor had cut the dream off before it became too terrifying. So I dozed back to sleep hearing Landor and Zem speaking softly over me.
“Does this happen often?” Landor asked.
“I don’t know. We o
nly started sleeping together since the mark. There were odd nights when we camped in the open, but mostly we slept apart.”
“She seemed so terrified.”
“Thank you. Your touch calmed her. It has before. I’m in your debt.”
“There is no debt. I care for her. Mayhap not as much as you yet, but more than enough that I feel her pain as surely as if it were my own.”
And then there was silence and the two men at my side settled back to sleep.
The second time I came to wakefulness, it was out of a nightmare of a very different experience. Landor’s soothing words couldn’t calm me and my eyes sprang open in shock.
“We have to go. They’re after him. They want him dead. They’re after him!” I cried into the darkness.
“It was a dream,” Zem mumbled sleepily from my left side.
“No! Not a dream! It’s happening now! Just like Landor. Laric is in trouble, bad trouble. We have to get to him before they do.”
I scrambled down the bed between the two men and felt around for my sandals.
“Stop for a moment, Flea. Calm down and explain!” Zem demanded, fully awake and in warrior-mode now.
I could see him and Landor sitting up in bed, both looking delightfully mussed. Had it been any other time, I would have been tempted to climb back into bed and see how Zem would take including Landor in our love-making. I knew I was ready. Somehow, Prior’s situation had brought the three of us closer together. At least in this one instance there were no insurmountable blocks in place to keep us apart. Landor was neither my sworn enemy nor about to set me ablaze. And both Zem and I had come to like and respect the pale man a lot in the last quarter moon.
But this was not the time for sex. Laric, no matter how much I hated him and wished him harm, was about to fall foul of the Devourers. I’d seen their inky blue robes as they hunted him through the dark alleys of the fishing village he’d taken refuge in.
Landor scrambled off the bed and came to my side, placing a hand on either side of my face so I was forced to look at him in the shadowy darkness. “Tell us. We need to know what you know.”
