“Oh God, it’s my fault,” she cried.
“It’s not your fault.” He leaned his forehead against hers. “Don’t cry honey.”
“Detective Knight?” a woman called from the entryway.
“Yeah, down the hall,” he answered and picked his head up. “Relax and this will be over soon.”
Kacy nodded and waited for the investigators to reach them.
“He hit her in the face,” Gulliver told them. “Get what you can from her. He was wearing full clothing, gloves, and ski mask but one of his gloves came off and it’s there on the floor. He escaped through a bedroom window and if we’re lucky, we may get a print from the sill.”
“Hi.” The investigator moved in front of Kacy. “I’m Vanessa. Give me two minutes and then you can wash up.”
Kacy watched the woman scrape under her fingernails in case she had scratched the man. She swabbed the blood on her face. She picked fibers from her clothes, took her prints and swabbed the inside of her mouth.
“Gully, we’re done with her.” Vanessa rubbed his arm. “You’ve not called in a while.”
“Yeah, work has me busy.”
Kacy headed for the bathroom.
“Hey.” Gulliver stood outside in the hall by the doorway a minute later. “You okay?”
“She seems nice.” Kacy lifted her head to look at him in the mirror.
“She’s very nice.” He slipped his hands around her waist. “And yes, I’ve gone out with her, and no, I won’t be going out with her again.”
Kacy didn’t say anything. She had no right to feel jealous. When she removed the elements of her case, his job, and the fact he had to have had a life before her, the relationship she and Gulliver had no longer seemed real.
“Aren’t you going to ask me why I won’t be seeing her again?”
She shook her head and lowered her gaze. The threads of her wishes hung frayed in so many places. For him to take one and begin stitching it to a real hope, unnerved her. His silence went on far too long. She dared a glance into the mirror and his gaze met hers. His scar appeared on the opposite side in the reflection. He smiled sweetly and she reached up and put a hand to the side of his handsome face, pressing his cheek closer. Her pale fingers made a defined contrast to his dark tan. With her pinkie finger, she stroked over the black brow and the small white slash marring his face.
“I’ll tell you anyhow.”
“Okay,” she whispered, watching him in the mirror.
They made an attractive pair and she liked thinking about them being a couple.
“I found someone nicer,” he answered.
Kacy twisted around in his embrace. Gulliver’s hands slid to her back.
“I never meant to get this involved with you, Kacy.” He smoothed back her hair. “It wasn’t supposed to happen. However, I never once did anything with you because of the case.”
Kacy put her head on his shoulder as he drew her to him.
“I tried to tell you in the kitchen that first night we had coffee. I tried repeatedly to explain. I just didn’t think you’d ever believe me.”
“What will happen now?” She didn’t want to know, but had to ask.
“Between us?” He held her tighter. “I don’t know, sweetheart.”
“You joked with Allen about not getting too involved in a relationship.”
“And that was all it was, honey. A joke. You shouldn’t have heard it the way you did and I’m sorry.”
“Then what did Detective Shaw mean when he said you shouldn’t lead me on? He said ‘you of all people’?”
“He was referring to me dating a lot of different women. But I don’t want that anymore.” He continued pressing kisses into her hair. “I’ve never met anyone like you.”
“Crazy? Oh sure you have.”
“I mean someone who makes me feel warm inside. It’s a nice feeling.”
“They call it testosterone.” She was trying to keep him from making frivolous confessions just to make her feel better.
“That’s not the heat I’m talking about, though you do arouse the male part of me equally well.” He cupped her face and rubbed his thumb down her nose. “You make having a relationship something real for me. I made that comment to Allen so I’d have something to fall back on when the dust settles.”
“I don’t understand.” She continued to slide her hands up and down his sides with her usual nervousness.
“I’m afraid to think of what we have as too serious. The case will eventually close, you’ll be more confident than you ever imagined possible, and—” His words trailed off and she dug her fingers into his ribs as he left her hanging between whether he wanted a relationship or not.
“And what?” She tried biting her bottom lip but his thumb caressed it loose from her teeth.
“And then you won’t need me.”
Kacy’s heart flip-flopped excitedly. Everything she wanted stood before her, telling her all she needed to know.
“Gully, we have some prints from the windowsill,” Vanessa interrupted.
Kacy didn’t take her gaze from Gulliver. She didn’t want the woman to intrude on their moment. If Gulliver had anything to declare, she wanted desperately to hear it before words of love came tumbling from her open mouth.
He drew her face up and pressed a kiss on her lips. Not lingering, not brief, nonetheless, a clear statement to Vanessa.
“We’re coming.” He took Kacy’s hand and led her from the bathroom.
An electrifying tingle shot up her arm. She didn’t think there could be any feeling that surpassed falling in love.
* * *
That night, Gulliver sat on her sofa. They hadn’t discussed their future and she refused to rush the topic—it would make her seem like a depraved woman obsessed with having his love. She encouraged him to put his head back while she stood behind him circling her fingers lightly over his temples. She stroked his brow and smoothed out the wrinkles of pain and worry. Another harrowing day and she had survived.
“You should be the one sitting here and letting me pamper you somehow.” He pulled her down so she bent over the sofa. She folded her arms around his neck and kissed the corner of his mouth. “You saved me. The least I can do is help you get your headache under control. Soon the pain relievers will take effect.”
“Then we’ll go out to eat.”
She slid her hand down his chest, rubbed the row of buttons. Gulliver held her face in his hands. His lips brushed over hers and his head angled to deepen the kiss.
“I think I’d rather stay home and fix us dinner,” she said as their mouths parted.
His hand fit to the back of her head and forced her to come to his mouth. Passion took control and before she could stop him, Gulliver tugged her all the way over the back of the sofa. She landed in his lap with their hungering lips still fastened firmly together.
She shivered at the touch of his hand on her breast. He hesitated—she didn’t like when he thought she trembled because of him. She didn’t know how long it would take, but one day Kacy hoped he’d believe she’d never be even a little afraid of him. His touch excited her. His fingers swept a hot fire through her. He aroused every fiber of her being.
“The man that let you get away is a fool,” he remarked, driving her insane with the aggressive way he pursued her pulse down her neck as if he chased the last drop of water on earth.
He shifted and dropped her lightly to the sofa. Her legs parted and he stretched out over her. They kissed and cuddled for a long time. As if they were lost, Gulliver’s fingers never stopped moving. She could hardly breathe each time he caressed her sensitive areas.
“I’m sorry.” He lifted up on his arms. “It’s been a long day and I’m being an animal.”
“A very artful beast.” She caressed his cheek. “With kissing like that, I can hardly think of anything else.”
Her lips tingled and felt delightfully bruised. Gulliver retreated to sit on the end of the sofa. He held his hand out for hers and pulled her up. She b
ent a leg in front and left the other to dangle to the floor.
She felt all right, but he didn’t look very well. She had been the insensitive one, taking for herself and not seeing how much he had emotionally invested into her life.
“It’s getting late. How about a pizza or Chinese takeout?” he suggested.
“No, I’m going to make something tasty, special and hopefully quick.” She leaned to kiss him.
He tugged her close and hugged her so her cheek lay upon his. She loved how his unshaven skin awakened hers. She liked brushing her lips over the coarseness of his flesh.
“I don’t want you to go through any trouble.”
Kacy stood up. “I’ll go see what I have that meets our needs.”
“You need some help?” He started to get up.
“Sit,” she commanded. “I’ll let you know if there’s any reason for you to be underfoot in my kitchen. Besides, I can always resort to serving cake. It’s still in the refrigerator.”
His grin came with a laugh and he sat back down. She liked the idea of making him a meal, waiting on him and doing for herself at the same time.
After studying everything in the kitchen, the best she could come up with was a hearty tuna salad sandwich. The problem arose after she’d prepared the tuna.
“Gulliver, do you have bread at your place?” she asked, walking through the kitchen doorway.
He didn’t move and she went to the couch and saw he’d passed out. Adorably handsome, he slept. She decided to borrow a loaf of bread from Peter. When she touched the doorknob, she wondered what Gulliver would do if he couldn’t find her. She definitely didn’t want him to worry needlessly.
Leaving a note tucked in his hand. Kacy quietly slipped outside and hurried over to Peter’s. It seemed Gulliver’s overwhelming affection had her capable of doing much more than she could a week before, but her heart thumped a little faster than normal as she remembered halfway across the yard that her attacker could lurk behind any bush.
It didn’t make her tap on Peter’s door any lighter. Her knuckles hurt once she finished rapping them on the hardwood with several solid knocks.
She smiled when the door opened. “Hi Peter.”
“Kacy, come in.” He widened the opening and stepped back.
“I’ve come begging for bread. I made tuna salad so Gulliver and I could have sandwiches and there’s not a slice in the house,” she said uncomfortably, mentioning Gulliver only because she wanted Peter to understand how he fit in her life.
“I think I have some. I’ll be right back.”
“Thanks,” Kacy called after him.
She wandered around the foyer and stopped in front of a picture of flowers hanging on the wall. Then she turned and looked in the mirror and brushed at stray wisps of hair the breeze outside had stood up on end. She took a step back to study her reflection.
Once satisfied with her appearance, she went back to examining little objects. The crystal bowl attracted her to the table. Inside with keys and loose change lay a crumpled piece of orange paper identical in color to Gulliver’s notepad. She touched the balled-up scrap with a hesitant finger. When she heard Peter returning before she had time to unfold the note, she stuffed it in her back pocket.
“Here you go. It’s half a loaf and it’s wheat.”
“That’ll…be fine.” She took it with a shaking hand. “I’ll replace this tomorrow.”
Kacy went out the door. She tried to get a goodbye out, but it emerged like the croak of a frog.
Chapter Eighteen
Kacy hurried to her house without looking back. Slamming the door too quick and far too loud, she woke Gulliver.
He rubbed his eyes as he sat up. “Honey, you look as white as ghost.”
She retrieved the piece of paper from her pocket. With nervous fingers, she worked to unfold it. Shaking her hand at the sting of a paper cut, she managed the thing one-handed while sucking on her injury.
“Oh no. Oh God, no.” She held the note out to Gulliver.
He came off the sofa and took the paper.
“Where’d you find it?”
“Crumpled up in a bowl in Peter’s house.” She lifted the loaf of bread. “I went to borrow this and found that.”
Gulliver immediately flipped opened his cell phone. It came from his pocket so quickly, she didn’t think she had time to blink. Her concentration wavered as he made a call to the police.
“Maybe he found it,” she offered as some form of a plausible excuse.
“You have noticed he fits your description—blond curly hair, brown eyes, and if you ask me, he’s a bit obsessed with you.” He opened the door. “Stay here.”
“Where are you going?” She asked the dumb question knowing the answer. “Shouldn’t you wait for backup or something?”
“And let him get away?” He raked a hand through his hair in thought.
She was glad she got him to think beyond storming over to Peter’s house. The scar over his eye seemed more prominent—like a warning beacon.
“Gulliver, don’t go.” She grabbed his arm. “Please, wait until the patrol car comes and let them handle it.”
“Honey, they won’t know how dangerous he is.” He cupped her face and stroked a gentle, reassuring finger down the side of her nose. “I’ve done this before. Now stay in here and lock the door.”
Kacy nodded and watched the door close between them. It separated the good on her side, and the bad on his. Her heart sank with dread and she fought to get the door back open. Her fingers wouldn’t work and she struggled to get a grip.
She saw that Gulliver had already made it to Peter’s house. The light from the foyer spilled onto the porch when Peter answered Gulliver’s knock.
It went rather fast. Peter shouted something as Gulliver led him from the house. At the same time, a police car screeched to a stop in the road. There was no proper parking or even getting out of the middle of the road in case someone wanted to drive by. The two officers sprinted to Peter’s house and Gulliver identified himself.
It took no energy for Kacy to walk across the yard. She looked at Peter and he registered her presence.
“Kacy, you’re not going to let your Neanderthal cop boyfriend really take me to jail. You know me. You know I wouldn’t ever hurt you. Damn, Kacy, I’m not the one that attacked you,” he shouted.
The two officers escorted him to the waiting car. Blue lights, like some disco ball, flashed and flashed and flashed. They held her hypnotized.
“Gulliver did you have to be so rough?” She bit the inside of her lip, feeling they had made an awful mistake.
He didn’t answer and she let the matter drop.
“I have to go to the station and sort things out,” he finally said.
“Then I should go as well.”
“Not tonight. Peter will have to be interrogated and that can take a lot of time—possibly all night. I want you to lock your doors and go to bed early. I’ll be back when I can.”
“Gulliver?”
“We got him, Kacy. You’ve never been more safe.” He smoothed a hand over her hair and gazed at her silently for a long time.
If the ordeal was over, she had a terrific chance at finally getting out of the hellhole her life had become. Yet Gulliver looked at her with the same sad worry he had before—it would end the forced connection between them.
“You haven’t eaten,” she commented, sinking into his gentle tug.
“I’ll find something. There’s usually a stale donut or two hanging around the coffee machine.” He rubbed his cheek against her head. “You know, there is no proof. The fact that the note was in his house is only circumstantial evidence.”
“I know and I’ve already settled on not getting too many hopes up.”
She did want them to catch the man. She needed a sense of closure. However, holding onto Gulliver, she had the same fears he did, or maybe worse. He would find another desperate victim in need of his loving support and Kacy would lose him.
; “Come in the house with me for a minute.” Gulliver’s arm wrapped her waist. His body brought the strength she needed to lean on until her frazzled mind completed a run-through of all the facts. Peter could be a victim of coincidence or a setup. Neither registered well with her.
“I have something for you.” Gulliver’s dead serious tone surprised her.
Thoughts of commitment jumped to mind and faded just as fast when he pulled his gun from the holster on his leg.
“This is my spare. If Peter gets out, I want you to have this handy. The law can only keep a man behind bars for so long without concrete evidence.” He placed the cold steel in her palm.
“I don’t know. A gun? Can’t you just stay with me twenty-four hours a day instead?” she weakly joked.
“Do you really need me to?”
She smiled and threw herself against his hard body. His sincerity was enough to make her strong for his peace of mind.
“Not really. I need you to make sure nothing goes wrong.” She gave him a last squeeze and let go.
“Just keep it in the nightstand drawer.” He grasped her hand and led her to the bedroom.
She gave the gun back to him, not wanting to hold it.
“Don’t take it out. Don’t look at it. Pretend you don’t have it.”
“What if I do take it out and shoot someone by mistake?” She watched the drawer shut. “You know if I had that gun at the drycleaner’s, I might have used it. I was so sure about that man.”
“We’re going to set up a rule, okay?”
He held both her hands and his warmth reaffirmed all her trust in his judgment.
“The gun stays in the drawer unless someone is really threatening your life. Don’t take it out because you suspect the pizza boy. Don’t take it out because the mailman looks funny. Don’t even take it out because you hear a strange noise.”
“Maybe I’d like it better if you did stay with me twenty-four hours a day.” She got up from the bed and walked around the room. “Don’t say ‘yes’. I’m not really changing my mind. It just feels good knowing you would.”
“In a heartbeat, honey, you ask me and I will.”
Kacy shook her head, unable to speak, afraid she would ask when she didn’t want to. Then she sat on the edge of the bed when Gulliver’s cell phone rang. She watched him pace across her silver-carpeted bedroom. He said little and the grunted answers gave her no clue as to what the one-sided conversation was about. He didn’t appear happy and he confirmed as much when he snapped the phone shut so hard it made a loud, echoing sound in the quiet room.
A Desperate Longing Page 18
