by Nella Tyler
Abigail
Monday
The kids were gathered around the reading carpet, sitting crisscross applesauce and watching with rapt attention as I read the latest chapter of our current book. We’d started a new one this afternoon, which was always a crowd pleaser. I loved how excited they got over the books we read. They leaned in as I told the story, absorbing everything like the cute little sponges they were.
After I finished, we moved on to the question and answer portion of the story time.
“Who knows why the princess was sad?” I asked.
Several little hands went up. I called on Daija, who was sitting right in front of me across the carpet.
“She lost her puppy, and no one knows where it is.”
“That’s right, Daija,” I said, and the little girl beamed. “And why did-”
We all turned at a knock on the classroom door. Ms. Marconi, one of the office administrators, poked her head into my classroom.
“I’m sorry to disturb your class time, Miss East,” she said. “But you had a delivery at the front office, and I didn’t want to leave it up there for the rest of the afternoon.”
“Wait here, class,” I said to the children. “Have a quiet discussion about the book and what you think is going to happen next to the princess.” I rose from the carpet and walked across the room to the door, straightening my sweater as I did.
Ms. Marconi opened the door the rest of the way and I could see the bouquet of cream-colored roses she was cradling in one arm as gently as she would a newborn baby. I drew in a sharp breath at the sight of them. They were gorgeous, wrapped in shiny golden paper. I spied a card nestled into the bouquet.
“You must have a secret admirer we don’t know about,” Ms. Marconi said, her voice lowering to keep from reaching the little ears on the carpet.
“Well, it’s a secret even to me, then,” I said with a nervous laugh. “Thank you for bringing those down here.” I took the flowers from her and she left to return to her post in the front office.
I lowered my face to the soft petals and breathed in their sweet scent. I loved flowers, roses especially. I turned back to my too quiet students. At the unobstructed view of the flowers, they all let out a chorus of surprised noises. I smiled, my cheeks turning red at the attention, though I should have been used to it from them. They all started talking at once, asking where the flowers had come from, did I have a boyfriend, were the flowers for everyone, and even more rapid fire questions that I couldn’t hear in the cacophony.
I set the bouquet down on my desk and lifted my hands. The kids quieted down immediately.
“Let’s get into our reading groups now and get started on the afternoon’s work.” I clapped my hands and all the boys and girls sprang to their feet. They hurried into their much smaller groups while I watched. As soon as they were busily working, I plucked the card from its place between the flowers and opened it.
I wanted to send you something as beautiful as you are, but was only able to manage these flowers. I would love to see you again. Give me one more chance to sweep you off of your feet. If you’d like to go out, you only have to wave today in the car loop. Regards, Drew.
I reread the card several times, my heartbeat quickening in my chest. Had I ever mentioned to him how much I loved roses? I couldn’t recall, but we’d talked about so many things on Saturday, that I easily could have mentioned it. I’d been thinking about that pseudo date nonstop from the moment I drove away from his house until now. I still thought it might not be the best idea to date a father of one of my students, but I also couldn’t deny how much I enjoyed his company. He’d managed to win me over even after the mess up from the prior weekend. I’d wanted to say yes when he asked me out in his truck, but I hadn’t allowed myself to do it.
The kids were getting restless. I left the flowers on my desk and went to monitor their reading groups, drifting from one to the other to make sure they were actually working and not just messing around. Once they finished, we returned to the reading carpet and went over our phonics lesson for the day using a series of flashcards.
The end of the day came too quickly, nearly catching me off guard. I suddenly noticed we only had a few short minutes before the final bell rang. Mrs. Wallace would wonder where the hell we were if I didn’t get the kids ready and in line immediately.
“Gather your coats and backpacks,” I called out. I put on my own coat as I watched the kids do the same. We were lined up and ready to go when the bell rang shortly thereafter. I held the door open for the children to flow into the hall single file. We fell in behind Mrs. Wallace’s class and walked outside as one long line of kindergarteners.
Drew was already outside, of course, a big smile on his face that he pointed right at me. I couldn’t deny what seeing him did to my body. It reacted in a primal fashion, the heat cranking up as the pit of my stomach dropped in nervous anticipation. I wanted to see where things went with this man, I realized. I wanted to take the chance.
I made sure each of my kids made it to their parents’ vehicles and held Sophia back until it was safe for her to cross. Drew was just standing there, staring me down with his brown eyes. I took his inventory, relishing every inch of him. He’d come straight from work, as usual, but could dress casually in a pair of jeans and his winter jacket. I realized that I wanted very much to kiss him, to feel his hands exploring the curves and wonders of my body while I did the same to him. I was desperate for it. This friendly offer of accompanying him to the Valentine’s Day lunch had turned into something real more quickly than I’d been able to track. I didn’t want to fight it anymore.
As soon as it was clear, I told Sophia goodbye and let her go. She ran across the parking lot and jumped into her father’s outstretched arms. That was another thing that did me in: how great he was with his daughter.
I watched as he bundled Sophia into the passenger’s side and then walked around to his side of the truck. I smiled as he caught my eye. I made him wait for it and, at the last moment before he climbed into his truck, I lifted my hand in a wave. He smiled and returned the gesture. That warm feeling filled me up, staying long after they drove out of the parking lot.
I went inside, floating on air as I returned to my classroom to pack up for the afternoon.
Chapter 15
Drew
Tuesday
The great date with Abigail had bolstered my flagging spirits. I’d suffered a minor upset when she turned me down flat after I asked her about another date, but I didn’t let that bring me completely down. I’d seen the hesitation in her eyes, and understood that she’d left so quickly to avoid changing her mind. I liked this woman and wanted to see where a few more dates might lead us. She was the first person I’d even considered taking out after losing Chelsea. And she already had Sophia in her corner, so I didn’t need to worry about dating someone, really liking her, and then find out through some cruel twist of fate that she didn’t get along with my daughter.
I showered and dressed that morning with a smile I just couldn’t quite wipe off of my face. Nothing made me happier than seeing Abigail wave at me in the school parking lot during afternoon pick up. The flowers had worked. She liked me back enough to accept my offer to see where the next date might take us. With luck, it would lead to yet another date.
I stopped by Sophia’s room on the way downstairs, flipping on her light and making sure she was up and out of bed before I went to the kitchen. She yawned and stretched her back, rubbing her eyes with her little fists.
“You good, sweetie?” I asked.
She nodded and yawned again, showing off a mouthful of baby teeth. “I’m good, Daddy.” She jumped down from her bed and onto the floor. Once her feet touched the ground, she was good. If I left her sitting on the bed, I was liable to find her still in bed once I came upstairs again to check on her progress.
“I’m making pancakes this morning,” I said, and she gave me a sleepy smile. Pancakes were one of her favorite breakfast dishes.
She came down in less than fifteen minutes, dressed in a pair of blue corduroy pants and a red sweater. We had pancakes and orange juice together at the kitchen table, talking about what we each wanted to happen today. After we finished, I cleaned up the mess while Sophia brushed her teeth. After the last two years of this same schedule — her preschool drop off had been around the same time — we were old pros at this morning routine. By the time I finished cleaning, she was back downstairs again with her coat and backpack.
“Let’s go, kiddo,” I said. I held up my hand, and she slapped me her hardest five. I dropped her off at school with a kiss and a hug — and a wave to her gorgeous teacher who’d popped her head out of the door unexpectedly — and then drove on to work. Karen was in today, which meant we’d be able to have our monthly office meeting this afternoon. The three of us worked together quite well after being together all of these years.
I parked my truck and walked into the office, pausing in the front to chat with Karen for a few minutes before walking back to where the coffeepot was. I’d had some coffee this morning, but Brian and I kept the pot brewing all day while we worked. By the afternoon, I was usually wired and ready to swear off the black demon liquid for life…at least, until the following day when I was right back on the coffee train.
Brian wasn’t here yet — he sometimes got in later than I did since he stayed later in the afternoons — so I settled in at my desk and got started on the day’s work. There were plenty of emails to answer and calls to make to different foremen on the construction projects we had going throughout the region. I also had to follow up on some of the bids Orion had put in for three government jobs.
Brian strolled in about an hour after I did, smiling guiltily at me when I looked up from my desk.
“Nice of you to join us,” I said. “I don’t see you around here much. What was your name again?”
He shook his head. “Very funny. My battery was dead this morning. I had to get a jump from one of my neighbors.” He poured himself some coffee and walked back to his desk. “I need to take it to get a new battery at lunch. I might need another jump, though.”
“I have my jumper cables in the cab of the truck,” I said.
“I appreciate that.” He sat down and took a long sip of his coffee. He smiled gratefully. “I can always tell when Karen makes the coffee. I swear that women is magic.”
I tended to agree with him. Either she was sneaking in some special coffee or we just weren’t brewing it right in her absence.
“I’m going out with Abigail again,” I blurted. I just wanted to get it off of my chest. Brian and I didn’t talk on the phone; we saw each other every damned day and so didn’t really have to. That got Brian’s attention, my announcement tugging his eyes away from his computer screen.
“I thought she told you she wasn’t interested in going out again,” he replied, looking slightly confused. I’d talked briefly with him on Saturday night after Sophia went to bed. He’d ended up spending the rest of the day with us, as he often did on Saturdays when he wasn’t going out.
“She did. But I sent her some flowers yesterday and asked her to reconsider.” I grinned at my ingenuity, quite proud of what I’d come up with on the fly. It’d helped that she briefly mentioned how much she loved roses during our first dinner together. I was the kind of guy who remembered little details like that. It was what had initially gotten me into Chelsea’s good graces, and that woman had been notoriously hard to please.
Brian shook his head as he ran a hand over his close cropped blonde hair. “There’s no disputing that this woman is a knockout, but do you think it’s really the best idea for you to be dating Sophia’s teacher?”
My smile dimmed at this temporary rain on my parade. “What do you mean?”
He shrugged. “Think about it. If something goes south, she’s still teaching your kid. I just don’t think it’s a very good situation to put her or Sophia in if you can avoid it, which you can. There are literally thousands of women in this city, and you set your sights on the only one that sees your kid on a daily basis.”
I hadn’t even really considered the possibility that things might go wrong. To be honest, I was too excited at the feverish thoughts of everything that could go right. I hadn’t felt this way about a woman in a long time. It was thrilling. It felt like anything could happen. I wanted to keep living in that world of endless possibility, not shy away from it in exchange for brutal reality.
“Abigail loves Sophia. It’s one of the reason I think this could work. I don’t have to worry about that aspect. She and Sophia have a relationship that predates the one Abigail and I could have one day. I really couldn’t have asked for anything better than that.”
“I get that,” he allowed. “And, I could see by the way Abigail was looking at Soph that she loves the kid. I’m not sure how you could be around the little girl and not fall in love, but it’s still a cause for concern. What if things go wrong between you?”
“I don’t think Abigail is the kind of person who would take her personal problems with me out on Sophia. I’m not even a little bit worried about that.”
“You’re not worried about Sophia being upset over the fact that Abigail was in her life as your girlfriend and then suddenly goes back to being her teacher and nothing else?” He gave me a critical look, nodding when he saw the expression change on my face, meaning his words had hit their intended target. I hadn’t even considered that. “Think about how upset you were at the thought of having to tell Soph that Abigail wouldn’t be joining the two of you at the Valentine’s Day lunch. This would be a hundred times worse than that. Maybe even a thousand times worse. Sophia wants a mother.”
My face fell at that, but Brian kept right on going.
“That’s not commentary on you as a father. It’s just human nature. She sees other little kids with moms, and she wants one, too. It doesn’t mean she loves you any less. She’s just a normal kid who misses her mom. My worry is that she’ll start to look at Abigail as her mother way earlier than she should because they already have a great relationship. If things don’t work out between the two of you, that leaves Sophia in the lurch. Now, she’s lost Abigail as a mother figure, as well as Chelsea.”
That punched the wind right out of my sails. I never wanted to cause Sophia pain. Making her happy was the thing I wanted most in this world. I’d only looked at this from one side — the side that worked out best for me, I was ashamed to realize — but Brian was absolutely right. What happened if things fell apart between Abigail and me after Sophia began to see her as a mother figure? That would break her heart, which had already been broken once from losing her mother.
“Shit,” I said, finally, rubbing the back of my neck. My thoughts were moving faster than I could track them. “I really like this woman. You know how much I’ve steered clear of dating since Chelsea died.”
Brian nodded, but didn’t respond. He’d been the one pestering me to date, and now here he was telling me not to, at least not with the woman I was interested in.
“It’s more than just liking this woman. I have a feeling about her, you know?” I looked hopefully at him, but he didn’t seem willing to jump in to make this any easier for me. “I just don’t want to leave this avenue unexplored. I love Sophia more than anything in this life. You know that. But it’s been really lonely since Chelsea died.”
That softened him. He took a deep breath and let it out again, his light eyes never leaving mine. “I know it’s been hard. And, I know I’ve tried my damnedest to get you out there and dating again. I just want you to be careful, is all.”
“I plan to,” I said.
He nodded once. “Don’t hurt our girl, okay?”
“That’s the last thing I want to do,” I said.
“Alright.” He shrugged again and went back to reviewing whatever was on his computer screen.
I looked down at my half empty coffee mug. I still wanted to go out with Abigail, but maybe I needed to keep that completely sep
arate from Sophia until I knew for sure how things were likely to go. It was something I’d do with any other woman I decided to date. Why not Abigail, too? Just because she already knew Sophia didn’t mean I should include her in our tiny family. That would just have to work for now.
Sighing, I went back to my own work, pushing my coffee aside. My stomach just wasn’t right at the moment, and I needed a break from the bitter liquid.
Chapter 16
Abigail
Friday
After all of the children were safely on their way home at the end of the school day — and I’d waved at Drew, my stomach doing excited somersaults at the sight of him — I went back to my classroom to finish the last few tasks I had to complete before I could leave. I was going to meet Peyton for dinner tonight, which meant I wouldn’t be able to grade today’s papers at home the way I normally would.
I sat down and went through all the children’s work for the day, finishing the grading in less than an hour. I prepared the rest of the class activities for the Monday and was ready to go just after five. I walked out to my car and drove to our favorite Italian restaurant. My mouth had been watering all day long at the thought of the eggplant parmesan I planned to order once evening came. Not to mention the fresh baked bread and calamari appetizer. I could live off of those three items for the next sixty years of my life without being disappointed at the lack of variety.
Peyton was already sitting at our regular corner booth. She waved at the sight of me, and I waved back, just happy to see my best friend. She’d already ordered me a glass of my favorite white wine and had left the basket of fresh bread sitting untouched. At the sight of me, she tore into it.
“I can’t believe it’s taken us this long to finally get together,” she said as I sat down. She popped some bread into her mouth.
I reached for the loaf of bread and tore off my own warm chunk. I put it into my mouth instead of answering her, just wanting a bite before the heat left it. My eyes rolled back in my head at how great it tasted.
