by Nicole Thorn
A loud knock on something ripped me away from the sleep I almost reached. It was probably a good idea that I didn’t fall asleep, since I hit my head more than a few times. I didn’t want to slip away before I could see Layla again. I had to see her…
I listened hard for what happened upstairs. I heard the front door make that weird sound when it opened, and I waited to hear who was at the door. The voices of at least two men drifted down to me.
“Sorry to disturb you, ma’am,” the first man said. “My name is Officer Bolton; this is Officer Troy. We got a call saying there was some yelling. We need to investigate the domestic disturbance.”
Footsteps told me someone crossed the room, and I assumed it was my father, given how fast they were. “Excuse me,” he said. “Someone reported a domestic disturbance? Who?”
“I’m sorry, sir,” the other officer said. “We can’t tell you that. Would you mind if we took a look around?”
Two beats passed, and my mother said, “We don’t have a choice, do we?”
“I suppose not,” Officer Troy said. “But if you send us away, we’ll assume there’s a reason you don’t want us to look around.”
“Other than a violation of my privacy?” Mom said with a lot of bite.
“Honey,” Dad sighed. “Just let them…”
More footsteps stopped over me, and I strained to hear the whole conversation. The gap in the basement door was the only reason I could hear anything at all, so thank goodness for fire precautions.
“Is it just you two living here?” Officer Bolton said. “Were you two having a fight?”
“No,” my mother said, still snippy. “We didn’t get into a fight, and we live with our son.”
“Is he here right now?”
The sound of something banging closed made me think that they were checking cabinets or doors.
“He’s at his girlfriend’s house,” Dad said. “He left a few hours ago. Do you want me to call and get him home?”
Why was he making that offer? My phone was on silent and in my bedroom. He knew that.
“No, that’s fine,” one of the men said.
I listened as they walked around my house, searching for something to tell them what they wanted to know. Both men sounded bored when they spoke, so I was sure they wanted it to be over already. They probably got all kinds of accidental reports down at the station. They didn’t need to be here.
When I knew they had to be in my room, I waited for them to see what happened to it. So many things were smashed, and my blood was on the carpet. My lamp left a gash in the wall, my nightstand was destroyed, and my desk broken. The nightstand Mom had smashed in her rage, and the bottom drawer now had a hole in it. So I waited… and waited… and there was nothing at all. Not even a moment of them asking what happened.
Mom must have cleaned it up.
I couldn’t tell how much time passed when the men had finished traipsing through my home and questioning my parents. I heard them still in the spot above me.
“Now,” Officer Troy said. “Why would someone call in a domestic disturbance when nothing looks wrong. Not a mark on either of you.”
My mother laughed lightly. “That’s what we get for watching From Dusk ‘Til Dawn too loud. Sorry about that, sir. We’ll be more careful next time.”
“Troy,” the other officer said as he jiggled the handle to the basement door. It made me start. “Did you check in here?”
I heard my mother speak before he could. “Oh, we never go down there. There’s mildew that we’re saving up to get taken care of. Wouldn’t want you to get sick.”
“Sorry, Ma’am,” Officer Bolton said. “We have to check every room. This should only take a couple minutes. You can stay up here if you want to.”
My heart thudded in time with each step I heard coming down to me. I didn’t want to breathe because I thought it would be too loud. Every instinct in my body told me to stay quiet.
My mother didn’t listen to the officer, and she followed them down. I could hear her voice as she got closer to my box. “I’m so sorry that you boys wasted your time,” she said, forcibly casual. “I imagine you had important things to get to tonight.”
The men rummaged around, moving things on shelves. I could hear the wood creaking from the old bookshelves that held so many of my old things. The ones that had survived years of Mom’s spring cleaning but not good enough for her to let me keep in my room. I wondered what these men thought of those silly little objects.
I wished I could see Layla in my head. I’d give anything to have that image of her beside me like the last time I’d been in here.
“Nothing in here, Troy,” the other officer said. “Kitty is about to go into labor. I think we’re safe heading out for the night.”
“Yeah,” his partner sighed.
I listened to them all head upstairs, and I could breathe easy for a while. The officers left, and I shifted onto my side, needing to get a little stretching before my legs went numb. God, I hated being in here. I wanted to be in my bed, being held by the girl that made me love the world and being part of it.
My eyes opened when the box did, and I stared up at my mother, being blinded by the light. She reached a hand out to me and helped me out of my prison. Once I was on my feet, she brushed the dirt off of me, and I tried to find my balance.
“Are you okay?” she asked me.
I nodded.
“Good.” Mom patted my face and sighed. “I’m sorry I got a little upset with you earlier. I just…” Her eyes began brimming with tears, and her voice was weak. “You’re my little boy, and I don’t like the idea of some slut coming along and taking you from me. You understand.”
Fire began in my chest, and I didn’t have any doubt about where it belonged. That same little voice that told me to be quiet before, told me to be quiet now. I listened, not knowing why anymore.
“Promise you won’t see her again,” my mother asked. “Say you won’t see her, and I’ll be very happy.”
I nodded again. “I won’t see her.” The lie slipped through my teeth with ease. It felt like someone else said it.
“Good boy,” she said, smiling. “I know you didn’t mean to tell her that I hurt you. So how about I let you call her one more time to tell her that you’re fine and that you don’t want her in your life anymore. You deserve better than her anyway. Such a mouth on her. She’ll never keep a man that way.”
My tongue ran over my teeth, and I needed a moment to compose myself. What a disgusting thing to say about a person, but the words rolled out of her like it was nothing at all. How could I not see this from her before? Why did it take another person coming in for me to see hate and loathing in my own mother? The woman who used to hold me and kiss me when I cried? Did I check out for a decade or so?
“I’d like to go to bed,” I said, voice raspy. “Is that okay?”
“Of course,” she said, like it was obvious.
I struggled up the stairs and into my bedroom so that I could collapse onto my bed. I looked at the clock, realizing how long I had been in there. Six hours total since Layla left the house. I had to have passed out a couple times since then.
I waited there, having a plan in mind. I wanted to go to Layla because that little twinge told me to leave the house and go to her. I didn’t even care that I had no clue why it said that; I wanted to listen. I wanted to see Layla.
While the night dragged on, I cleaned up as best I could. Mostly bruises and a gash on the side of my head. I had to rinse the blood out of my hair, and the wound didn’t look all that bad after. My hair covered it for the most part.
My mom went to bed early, and I assumed my dad went with her since the house went dead silent. It was more than easy to slip out my window and head for Layla’s house.
I knocked on her door, ignoring the cold bite in the air. Nothing hurt anymore when Layla answered the door.
“Oh, my God,” she said, rushing to hug me. Her arms went around me, holding me tightly and
repeating the phrase over and over again. “You didn’t answer your phone,” she said, tilting her chin up to see me. “What happened?”
“Can… can we go inside?” I asked.
Layla didn’t say anything, but she pulled me into her dark house. A mug sat on her coffee table, and only one dim light was on. The house sounded silent like mine did when I left. Layla sat me on the couch and began looking for wounds. She made a face at every mark on me.
“I didn’t know what to do,” she said, holding my wrist and looking at the yellowing bruise there. “I wanted to call the cops… but I didn’t know if that would make it worse.”
Exhaustion made everything in my head all fuzzy, so my mouth started moving. “Someone else called the police.”
Layla’s blue eyes went wider as she took my hand. “Why? What… what happened?”
I think she knew or she wouldn’t have looked so downcast and full of dread. I was alive and moving around, so that must have served as a comfort to her. She could see me almost undamaged.
“There was yelling,” I said. “Mom found the condoms in my dresser. She wasn’t happy about it.”
Layla covered her face with her hands, sighing into them. “So, she didn’t freak out worse about what I said?”
My silence seemed to answer for her.
“Benny,” she cried, carefully putting her arms around my neck. Her warm breath tickled my skin, making me feel calmer all around. “I am so sorry. I didn’t mean for her to hurt you. What did the police do?”
We separated our bodies, and I leaned against the side of her couch, stopping to catch my breath. “Nothing.”
“Nothing? What the fuck do you mean, nothing?”
“They didn’t see me.”
She rubbed her eyes and tried to comprehend what I said. Maybe in my sleepiness I sounded off. “I don’t get it.” She held her head up in her hand. “How did they not see you?”
I shook my head. “I was… I was in the box.”
It was like watching her heart shatter when she spoke. “What… what’s the box, Benny?” Her voice was a horrified whisper, and she swallowed.
I stared at my knee, picking at the fabric on my jeans. “You know how when you were bad, he would send you to a room? Well, I have something like that… but it’s an old freezer in my basement. She only had me down there for a few hours this time.”
“Hours?” Layla asked, her voice shattering. “She locks you in a freezer?”
“It doesn’t work.”
“It doesn’t matter if it works or not!” She got onto her feet and began to pace, her fingers knotting in her hair as panicked eyes stared at the floor. “Your fucking mother locks you in a freezer… Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I didn’t want to upset you.”
Her body froze, and she looked at me with something akin to betrayal. “Bennett, don’t you ever do that to me again,” she ordered. “Don’t try and spare me at your expense. You were locked in a soundproof box, and you didn’t tell me she did that to you.”
I felt my forehead wrinkle. “It’s not soundproof.”
She looked even more confused than I did. “Then why didn’t the police hear you when you were yelling for them.”
“I… I wasn’t yelling.”
Layla blinked, and her hands fell limply to her sides. “What?” she asked softly.
I shook my head. “I didn’t call for anyone.”
Her mouth hung open as she stared right through me, her eyes looking like they knew far too much and not enough at the same time. “Oh,” she said as she sat down. She rubbed her hands down her thighs, sniffled, and nodded. “I see…” After she cleared her throat, she took my hand. “How about I take you to bed? We can rest, and my mom can look you over in the morning. My dad had a shift he had to pick up for one of the other nurses.”
I let her take me upstairs and bring me to her bed. She took my shoes off and tucked me in like I was a child. That sorrow never left her the whole time, and she refused to meet my eyes as she took care of me. Was she disappointed in something I did? I didn’t understand. There was so much that I just didn’t understand, and I felt like the hope for it was slipping through my fingers.
Layla got into her bed with me and pulled the covers over the both of us. I lay on my side while she lay behind me for once. Carefully, she put her arms around me and put her lips to my shoulder.
“Goodnight, love,” she said, her voice as shattered as it had been the last time she spoke to me.
“Goodnight,” I said back to her. “I love you.”
She didn’t say anything else. All she did was sniffle and cry against me.
was so, so stupid. I thought he came over because he was finally on my side. I thought that he saw the truth and was ready to do the right thing for himself. But… But the idea to scream for help never once crossed his mind while he was in that box. He’d laid in there, hearing cops in his house, and he didn’t try and save himself. After being beaten for the sin of his non-girlfriend’s big fucking mouth and having sex at the age of twenty-one. He didn’t do a single thing wrong, but he wore the guilt on his shoulders like it was a curse. I didn’t know how to make him see the light, and now I wasn’t sure he ever could. Not if he didn’t want to.
I ended up facing away from him some time in the night. I wasn’t holding him anymore, and I felt it like a genuine loss. I needed to reach out and feel him, remember that he was almost fine and with me. Not with his abusive mother or his father who turned the other way. You’d think that one of them would actually care about their son.
“Baby?” I said, groggy as I turned and opened my eyes to a blurry bed. I felt nothing but my blankets as I ran my hand across the bed. His spot was cold, so he hadn’t been with me for a while.
As my vision came back to me, I saw that he wasn’t here at all. Not in my bed and not in my room. I sat up, looking harder at my surroundings. My bathroom was empty, and his shoes were gone.
Fuck.
I launched out of bed and barely had time to put my own shoes on before I was out the door. I had my phone and shot out a quick text to my mom as I ran down the stairs, letting her know I was leaving. After last night, she wouldn’t have reacted well to me vanishing.
I was out of my house and slamming into my car maybe two minutes after opening my eyes. It was probably dangerous to drive, but I had to get to Bennett’s house fast. I didn’t know if he went there for sure, but where else did he have to go? Why would he come to me just to leave?
There was something wrong in his head, and that had to be the answer to all of this. He didn’t understand yet, but I would make him understand. After last night, I couldn’t let him go back there. I didn’t care if the police tried to arrest me for kidnapping or if his mother tried to kill me. Bennett wasn’t staying in that house.
I parked at someone else’s sidewalk since someone else blocked where I usually parked. I was extra-pissed off at them and in a rush or I would have thought about keying the car instead of kicking the tire. I took out some fury and ran to the front door of the house.
I rang the bell three times in a row, having no patience at all. When three seconds passed, I started pounding on the door. Someone was gonna fucking answer for me, or I would find another way in. I wasn’t going home until Bennett was in my car.
No answer, and I turned to notice that the car wasn’t in the driveway. I supposed there was a chance that his parents weren’t home, but where the hell was Bennett?
Fine then, if he wouldn’t let me in his house, I knew how to get in on my own. I went around the house, and full-on broke into the backyard. I didn’t care if a person passing by saw me and called the cops. I would tell them everything and deal with what they did to me after. The punishment I was looking to get Bennett’s mother was far worse than anything I could get for B&E. It was worth it.
When I got around to his window, the blinds were closed. That meant he was hiding from me, and I had to force my way in. I would be sure to scold him
about it later, letting him know that I was trying to help him out. I was always trying to help him.
I pulled his window open because even though Bennett was brilliant, he was a dummy and didn’t lock it.
I tumbled through his curtains and onto his floor, scolding him already. “Answer your fucking door next time.” I pushed up with my hands, my hair falling in my face. “I mean really… I could have broken something…” I trailed off when I looked up and didn’t see him. I didn’t see a soul in the room.
I hauled my ass up, getting to my feet, and dusting myself off. I decided that the house was probably empty, but that didn’t leave me with a lot of options on where he went off to. He had nowhere to go.
With a sigh, I looked around his bedroom. The wall was off, having a huge gash mark on it like it had been stabbed with something. That wasn’t the only thing a little weird, but I knew what made everything wrong. His nightstand was missing, along with his lamp. A smooshed box of condoms was thrown on his dresser, but things were missing everywhere. Little things he had thrown on his floor were gone, and half the clothes in his closet.
I walked over and knelt to examine the damage from his desk. It looked like someone took a hammer to the wood, knocking a hole in it, and making the thing sit crooked. Bennett loved that desk, and it broke my heart to see it all fucked up. Maybe if I messed with the drawer, I could at least get it back in place. I had to wait here for who knows how long anyway.
I cursed when I dug my nails into the edges of the drawer and snapped one in half. This was why Adalyn trimmed hers… I would have to think about that when I wasn’t in such a tense situation. My body felt all jittery as I waited, pulling the desk apart. I was technically breaking the law, but that was at the back of my mind. Bennett’s whereabouts were the most important thing to me. He would want this fixed when he got home.
“Fuck!” I yelled when the drawer came off in my hands. “Oh, fuck fuckity fuck!” I stared at the broken wood in my hands, and then I looked back to the inside of the drawer.
