by Beth Martin
Light still peeked along the edges of the shade, leaving the room not quite dark, even with all the lights off. I turned to the bed and gasped. Lola sat on the edge of the bed wearing a long dress. She stared at me with glossy eyes and bit her lip.
“It’s gone.”
I sighed and sat down on the bed next to her. I was too tired to fight with her and instead asked, “What’s gone?”
“The town I lived in. My home.” She sniffled and wiped her eyes with her hands. “All that’s left is that gigantic crater.”
Had the cliff I had fallen down been the edge of a crater? I hadn’t really checked it out. “You used to live in the barrens?”
“They weren’t always barrens. Zeta used to spin. It had a day and night cycle just like other planets. Ten hours of light followed by ten hours of dark.”
I knew that a planet’s angular velocity and orientation could vary over time, but a drastic change in spin like Lola was describing took thousands of years.
I clutched my head in my hands. First an imaginary subway and now an impossible planetary deceleration. Would my delusions keep ramping up and become more and more unbelievable? Would I start to embrace the fictions my mind came up with? The thought scared me to the core.
Lola scooted to the middle of the bed and hugged her knees to her chest. “I need your help.”
“How so?”
“Go to Chi.”
I stood up and turned to face her. “What? Why? And how? There’s rarely flights that go that far.”
She looked down, then to my face, her icy blue eyes piercing into my soul. “I’m not really here.”
“Fuck,” I said, throwing my hands up in the air. My delusion had finally confessed to being a delusion. I walked over to the covered window and stared at it as if I could see the view behind the blinds.
“I’m real,” she whispered. “I’m not a hallucination. What you see is a projection. I don’t know what happened to my physical body, but the last thing I remember was traveling to Chi. Go there and find out what happened to me. I want to be whole again.”
I heard her footsteps on the plush carpet coming toward me. I must have been psychotic, but for some reason, I turned to face her. There were crystal tears streaking her cheeks. She reached up a hand to brush her fingertips down my cheek. Instead of wincing away from her stony cold touch, I leaned into it.
“I’ll make it worth your while.” I could feel myself get hard as she whispered in my ear. “My body is warm and soft just like yours, not hard like my projection.”
I tried to step back and away from her, but instead stumbled into the window. “No, no. There’s no way to be in one place and project yourself to another.”
“Isn’t there? What about holocomunication? Don’t you see someone who’s not there when you make a call?” She walked back to the bed and sat down. I felt like I could finally breathe now that we had some distance between us.
“Sure, but you can’t feel them or hear them in your head.”
“Why not? Holographs make something appear to your eyes which may not physically be there. Have you considered that the same exists for your ears and tactile receptors?”
I could feel a headache coming on. I pressed my hands against my head and squeezed my eyes shut. If I blocked her out, it would only get worse. “No. I’ve never thought about it.” A sharp pang of lightning flashed behind my eyes.
“There’s a shuttle going to Chi in two days. Make sure you’re on it.” As she walked to the door, my head continued throbbing, but as soon as she left my room, the door shut behind her, and the fog clouding my head began to clear.
I walked over to the bed and fell back into the mattress. It squeaked in protest under my weight. I didn’t want to think about Lola, Paradido, or Chi. I didn’t want to consider projections or holograms versus hallucinations.
My head didn’t feel good when I got back up, but what I really needed was a distraction. I splashed some water on my face then left my room. When I got back to the lobby of the hotel, I asked the receptionist, “Where’s the closest bar?”
My mouth tasted like bitter bile. My head hurt, but not like a typical episode. No, this was a hangover headache. I rolled over, getting caught in the scratchy sheet and finding a strange woman sleeping next to me. She had dark skin speckled with freckles and a head of brown curly hair. I watched her for a while—the gentle rise and fall of her chest felt soothing. Even though I couldn’t remember her, or many other details from the previous day, by the lack of clothing on either of us, I had a good idea of what had happened in my room.
I sat up slowly, my head painfully swirling in protest. I needed to drink some water, but first I needed to put on some clothes. My underwear wasn’t far from the bed, and once I had gotten my shorts and a shirt on I went into the bathroom to get a drink. This cheap room didn’t even have those shitty recycled cups, so I stuck my head under the sink faucet and drank like that.
Once quenched, I splashed water on my face, then looked up at the mirror. I couldn’t make out a whole lot of detail since the mirror was completely fogged up. Still, something seemed off. I held a hand up to my face. The skin at my temple stung when I touched it. I could feel the curves of a gash sliding down to the bridge of my nose and farther down my face along my cheek and finally ending at my earlobe. I looked at my fingers. At least there wasn’t any blood.
The woman in my bed had left her shiny, little black bag on the counter. Curious, I opened it and sifted through the contents. It was mostly cosmetics, a few loose mints, and a couple condoms. I closed her bag and put it back where I found it before returning to the bedroom.
“There you are,” she said in a deep, husky voice. She sounded almost like Adam. “I was beginning to think you had left.”
“I was just in the bathroom.”
She sighed and rolled onto her back, stretching her arms up above her head. She was amazingly beautiful. Her eyes were a light yellow-green, and she had curves in all the right places. I had no idea how I had convinced her to leave with me.
When she rolled away, I saw immediately what must have drawn me to her. On her left shoulder was a tattoo of Orion. The stars were marked in heavy black strokes surrounded by an illustration of the mythical man in delicate blue lines.
I walked over to the bed and sat down, reaching my hand to her shoulder and gingerly touching her tattoo. I traced his belt with my finger.
“Still enamored with the ink?”
“Huh?” I said.
“You were talking about it all night. I’ve never met anyone so fascinated with the stars.”
I let my hand trail down her back. “Really?” I couldn’t recall a single thing from the previous twelve hours. I wished I could remember making love to the beautiful woman lying next to me. At least I could still marvel at her beauty.
She rolled back to face me and pulled me in for a kiss. “That one’s on the house.”
I had no idea what she was talking about, and the confusion must have shown on my face. She got up out of bed and got dressed. The only article of clothing she had other than her shoes was a short little dress. After popping into the bathroom, she reemerged with her black bag tucked under her arm.
“Thanks for the lovely evening and generous tip. If you’re ever in town again, be sure to look me up.” With a wink, she slipped out of my room.
Of course the only way I could have scored someone so beautiful was to pay for her time. I collapsed into the bed and stared at the ceiling. The shuttle was in just 25 hours. Was I really going to Chi? Would I actually find Lola there?
•••
“Let me know if there’s anything I can help you with.”
I nodded at the sales clerk as I continued looking around the store. The bright side of Zeta had a much warmer climate than the barrens, so all the clothing here was lightweight. I needed something warm for Chi. I had never been there before, and had no concept of just how cold the freezing climate would feel.
The only
people who resided on Chi were scientists. And apparently Lola. Maybe she was actually a scientist and had discovered a method to telepathically communicate. I shook my head. It was a ridiculous thought. She was a delusion. I was foolish for even entertaining the idea of venturing to Chi.
But I had nothing to lose. After taking the escape pod off of the now missing Paradido, no other ship would want to employ me. Sole survivors of destructed ships were considered bad luck. If I stayed on Zeta, it was only a matter of time before I’d slip up bad enough to get sent back to the Nazarian and Ryan Institute. If I really thought about it, taking the shuttle to Chi was my only option.
After browsing through a handful of racks, I knew I wasn’t going to find what I needed at this store. I turned and exited, then continued walking along the sidewalk down the line of shops. I breezed past a few more clothing stores. The next storefront was a technology retailer. I chuckled at some of the ridiculous tech displayed in the front: a laser for slicing eggs and gloves which were supposed to train users to play the virtual harp.
Even though they wouldn’t have warm clothing, I felt myself drawn to the store. I stepped inside and looked around.
Aside from a few oddities, the shop was mostly stocked with the usual technology crap you’d give your uncle for his birthday. They had ear-buds which played music, aluminum bracelets which claimed to reduce warp travel nausea, and pocket panels too small to actually be useful.
Something glistened in the corner of my eye. I turned to find a single rack of clothing made of some sort of gold metallic fabric. I felt oddly drawn to them. There was a hooded jacket, pants, gloves, and even socks made out of the stuff, along with what looked like a bandana to cover the nose and mouth.
I held up the hoodie and examined it. The fabric was surprisingly cool to the touch. The inside was such a flat black that no light reflected from it whatsoever.
“That’s the new insulator line,” the woman working at the store said as she walked toward me. She had hot pink lips and her hair was tied up in a high ponytail. A badge on her shirt said her name was Sara.
“Hmm,” I said, returning the hoodie to its rack.
She made a smacking sound with her lips as she earnestly chewed on something. “They’re supposed to keep all of your body heat in and block out extreme temperatures. Honestly, we don’t sell too many of them.”
I raised my brows in surprise as I looked at her. “How extreme?”
“It’s the same material used in the suits for the scientists on Chi, so it must work pretty well.”
“Really?” It was almost too perfect. I wondered if that was the truth, or just something the company manufacturing it claimed.
“Sure. It says right there on the tag.” She pulled out a rectangular card from the front of the garment and turned it to show me. The fine details in the hologram weren’t quite clear, but I could see the outline of a few people wearing similarly shiny clothing surrounded by what appeared to be ice. It must have been a snapshot of the research team sporting their gear on the surface of Chi.
Sara smacked her lips again. “There’s a twenty percent discount when you purchase the whole set.”
“I’ll take it.”
She led me to the register where she scanned and bagged all of the golden outerwear. “That’ll be 700 Teuros.”
I gasped for breath. That was how much I made in a month. “Shit, that’s expensive. These better work.”
“Well, we have a thirty day no-questions-asked return policy.”
I sighed.
“I know, that won’t do you any good somewhere like Chi. But if you do survive the cold, you can bring it back.” She handed me the bag with a huge grin once the transaction was complete. “Thanks for shopping with us.”
I took the bag, but didn’t move from where I stood in front of her. “How did you know I’m going to Chi?” It wasn’t a common destination. There was no way she could have known.
She tilted her head. “Just a lucky guess.”
I looked at Sara for a moment longer, trying to figure her out. The only person who knew I planned on traveling to Chi was Lola, and Lola only existed in my head. It had to be a lucky guess. I sighed and looked into my bag, doing a mental inventory to make sure every item was in there. Satisfied, I looked back up to Sara who was still smacking her lips.
“Safe travels,” she said.
I nodded and walked out of the store.
•••
I knew rubbing my fingers against the smooth film on the surface of my ticket would wear the hologram away, but I couldn’t see much of it to begin with. The slick sensation was calming, and I was a ball of nerves.
I sat at the gate waiting for the small ship to start boarding. I could see it through the wall of windows. Even though the passenger ship was a sub-warp vessel, it was a good bit smaller and lighter than Paradido and moved much faster. This flight would only take 18 hours, as opposed to the two-month trip on a delivery ship.
There was only one other passenger on my flight, a short man who had muscles upon muscles. He had close cropped blond hair and sunken brown eyes. He was also sitting in the waiting area of the gate. I looked around the spaceport at the crowds of people waiting for bigger ships. My sole traveling companion and I were the only ones who weren’t absorbed in a panel.
“Not too often people come to visit the lab.”
It took me a moment to realize he was talking to me. “Oh, uh, yeah. It’s my first visit.”
“I figured. I’ve been working there since they set up the lab. I’m Doron.” He held out his hand and gave me a firm handshake. “So who are you visiting?”
“Uh, no one really. I just thought I’d go check the place out.”
He gave me an inquisitive look. “You know there aren’t any hotels or attractions there—just the lab. Who are you staying with?”
Even though I had been obsessing over this trip to Chi for the last two days, I hadn’t actually thought all the details through. “I… I don’t know.”
“Well, you’re more than welcome to stay with me. I don’t know why anyone would want to check out Chi, but I can show you around the place.”
I was incredibly grateful. “Thank you. That’s a big help.”
We waited in silence for a while, and I started to wonder if our flight had somehow gotten delayed. Then I noticed a team of security personnel jogging through the port while one of them barked orders into a communication device. I watched them run down the wide walkway, then disappear through an unmarked door.
“What’s going on?” I asked, mostly to myself.
I was about to get up when a radio announcement pierced into my ears. “Alert. There is a man on Zeta wanted for impersonating an officer.” An image flickered onto all of the panels dotted throughout the port. All I could see was the outline of a man’s head and some red text at the bottom. “Do not try to approach him. He is considered dangerous and is mentally unstable. If you spot this man, please notify the nearest security agent.”
“Impersonating an officer? What a dumb thing to do,” Doron said.
I nodded at him and could feel a tight knot forming in my stomach. The woman I had spoken with in the security office must have deduced my true identity. “It’s certainly a high level of stupid.” I looked up at Doron, and for a second I could clearly see the red text in the hologram.
It said, “WANTED: Jake Metcalf.”
I could feel my stomach drop and my head felt light. Why was Doron still talking to me instead of turning me in? That’s when I remembered the new gash on my face. I gingerly touched my sore cheek. It must have been enough for Doron not to recognize me as the face in the hologram. I was suddenly grateful for whatever accident or altercation had caused my disfigurement.
My future of getting locked back up at the Institute flashed through my mind. That’s when an agent for the starline announced boarding for my flight. I took a deep, unsteady breath and kept my head down as I followed Doron to the boarding passage.
This was it. My ticket had Officer Cory’s name on it. If the agent noticed it, this would be the end. Instead, she glanced at it and let out a tsk of annoyance. “Next time, don’t scratch away the details from your ticket.”
“Sorry,” I muttered, still keeping my head down so she couldn’t get a good look at my face.
“Well, no one in the right mind would try to sneak onto a ship headed to Chi. Go ahead.” She handed me my ticket, and I raced through the passage and onto the ship.
Aside from the escape pod and rescue craft, I had never been in a vessel this small. The cabin where the pilot and copilot sat was separated from the passengers by only a thin curtain. There was one flight attendant who sat in the main cabin. Doron and I took our seats in the back of the ship, and within ten minutes we lifted off.
I slept through the first part of the flight. But even after getting a full eight hours of sleep, we still had another ten before we’d arrive at Chi. Doron and I exhausted all topics of polite conversation within an hour. With nothing left to do, we sat quietly in our seats, staring out of the small windows of the ship.
Doron reached down under his seat to grab his bag. “Want to play a game of checkers?”
“No thanks.”
“Come on, there’s nothing else to do.” He pulled a pad from his bag, waved his hand over it, then held it out at me.
“I don’t want to play.”
“I’ve got other games.” He swiped his finger through the air above his pad, likely flipping through the applications. “Chess, backgammon, aliens vs vegetables—”
“That’s okay. Just play against the A.I.”
“Oh, this is a good one. Ever play domination? It’s a fabulous game.”
“No, I can’t.”
