by Amy Reece
This Time
By Amy Reece
This Time
Copyright © 2018 by Amy Reece.
All rights reserved.
First Print Edition: June 2018
Limitless Publishing, LLC
Kailua, HI 96734
www.limitlesspublishing.com
Formatting: Limitless Publishing
ISBN-13: 978-1-64034-390-0
ISBN-10: 1-64034-390-3
No part of this book may be reproduced, scanned, or distributed in any printed or electronic form without permission. Please do not participate in or encourage piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to locales, events, business establishments, or actual persons—living or dead—is entirely coincidental.
Dedication
For the first responders who risk their lives on a daily basis. Also, for parents who adopt. Your giant hearts are a blessing and an inspiration.
Table of Contents
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Sixteen
Chapter Seventeen
Chapter Eighteen
Epilogue
Chapter One
Seamus
Late again. Seamus pulled his t-shirt over his head and ran his hands through his hair, setting it on end, then brushed it back into something approximating a style. He and Sloane hadn’t been on time for the weekly family dinner in over six months and they certainly wouldn’t be today. His siblings would razz him mercilessly, of course, but neither of his parents would bring any word of reproach. They would simply claim they were happy he was there, no matter how late. He’d prefer an ass-chewing; the unmistakable look of disappointment in their eyes was hard to swallow. Why do I let her do this to me every week? He would arrange to pick her up with plenty of time to spare—and lately he’d padded the time in an attempt to circumvent her chronic tardiness—but she was never ready. This afternoon he’d arrived at her apartment a full hour before they needed to leave, but she was still in bed when he let himself in.
“Don’t be mad, hon. I was up all night working on the spring lineup.” She was a buyer for Macy’s, currently in charge of junior women’s fashion. Then she smiled in that sultry, seductive way she had and flipped the covers back to reveal her warm, naked body. “Join me.”
His irritation slipped away as other, more primal emotions took over. His big brain ceased to function as his little brain grabbed control of the situation and ordered him to get naked as fast as humanly possible. Within seconds he was pulling Sloane’s gorgeous body against his own and moaning into her mouth.
Forty-five minutes later, he was cursing himself for his inability to resist her. She was now in the shower, which he knew from experience also meant at least an hour extra while she blow-dried her long, blonde hair and applied a crap-ton of makeup. The sex had been great, as always, but was it worth disappointing his family yet again? He used to think so, but lately he wasn’t sure. He sighed and grabbed the remote. I might as well catch part of the game while I wait.
An hour and fifteen minutes later, she finally reappeared from the bathroom, perfectly coiffed, her full lips glistening. “Why don’t I choose a shirt for you from the ones you keep here?” Sloane spritzed perfume as she asked.
“This one’s fine. You ready?” He clicked the television off and stood.
“It’ll just take me a second to get you a different one.” She was already headed toward her closet.
Here we go again. “No, Sloane. The one I’m wearing is perfectly fine.” But she wasn’t listening.
“Here.” She reappeared, a long-sleeved dress shirt in her hands. “This one makes your eyes look so blue.”
“My eyes are blue.” He was not in the mood for this right now. “And I’m wearing this shirt to my parents’ house.” He pointed to his t-shirt, emblazoned with the logo of the Albuquerque Fire Department. “I like it. It’s soft.”
She frowned, reaching out to finger the hem. “But it’s getting really ratty, babe. It’s not something you want to wear out in public.”
“It’s not public! It’s my parents’ house! My folks don’t give a shit what I wear, Sloane! We’re over an hour late, so can we please just go?”
“Fine, Seamus!” She flung the shirt on the bed and crossed her arms. “I guess you don’t care how you present yourself to the world, but have you ever thought about how your appearance reflects upon me?”
He laughed, unable to help himself. “What are you talking about? How does me wearing a t-shirt to my parents’ house for a barbecue reflect on you in any way?”
“In my career, I need to look good all the time. I also need my boyfriend to look good.”
“I wasn’t aware your boss would be there today at our family dinner.” He was so sick of this argument and the variants of it they’d been having for the past few months.
She apparently didn’t care for his snarky comeback. “Well, maybe I should stay home.”
He sighed and tried hard not to roll his eyes. “Could we not do this right now? Let’s just go to the barbecue, okay?” How did they go from heating up the sheets to a stupid fight in just over an hour?
She stared at him through narrowed eyes for a long moment. “Fine. Wear whatever you want.” She turned and stalked out of the bedroom, anger oozing out of every pore.
***
“So, what crawled up the fair Sloane’s ass?” Finn appeared at his elbow and handed him a bottle of beer.
“Thanks.” Seamus glanced to where Sloane was standing—arms crossed and a sour look on her beautiful face—with his sisters and sisters-in-law. The other women were all chatting amiably, laughing and touching Mel’s burgeoning belly, obviously comparing it to Izzy’s smaller baby bump. Mel was due in about a month, Izzy sometime around Christmas. The DeLuca family had gained three new members in the last year alone: Mel, Finn’s wife; Chris, Hugh’s wife; and Mac, Izzy’s husband and the father of their five-year-old daughter, Janey. Seamus liked all his siblings’ new spouses—although at first, he’d deeply mistrusted Mac, who had been conspicuously absent for the first five years of Janey’s life—but he was slightly horrified at how fast things were changing for the DeLuca family. How long would it be before Cara got married? Surely she was next. “Sloane doesn’t like my shirt. We had a fight about it earlier.” He twisted the top off his beer and took a deep, much-needed pull.
“Is that why you were so late?”
He choked slightly and coughed to cover it up. “Yeah, pretty much.”
“Why doesn’t she like your shirt? It looks exactly like what you always wear.”
“Apparently it’s ‘getting really ratty.’ I’m making her look bad.” He took another swig and wished Finn would drop it.
“Nothing could make Sloane look bad.” Finn took a pull from his own beer. “But she does look pissed. Better you than me, bro.”
Seamus grunted and set his beer on the table. “Whatever. You up for some bocce?”
***
“Are you coming in?” Sloane directed the words to the passenger side window, refusing to look his direction. She’d stayed angry throughout the afternoon, making everyone uncomfortable, until h
e’d finally decided he should take her home.
He shook his head but realized she couldn’t see him in the dark. “I don’t think so. It’s probably better if I don’t stay.”
She was silent for a moment. “Fine.” She sniffed and finally turned back to him. “I leave for Chicago in the morning.”
“I know. I’ll be here in time to take you to the airport.”
“Don’t bother. I’ll take an Uber.”
He sighed and ran his hand through his hair. “You don’t have to do that, Sloane.”
She laughed harshly and wiped her eyes. “I want to.”
“How long will you be gone?”
“Um, I’m not really sure. I may stay for a while.” She turned to stare out the window again. “I think we need some time apart, Seamus. I love you, but all we ever do is fight these days.”
He knew she was right but didn’t know how to feel about it. She’d been vocal about saying she loved him for months, and although he’d said it back a few times, he wasn’t so sure anymore. What was ‘love,’ anyway? He loved his family, of course, but loving a woman was obviously different. He’d initially been attracted to her beauty and was thrilled when she gave him her phone number after they were introduced at a friend’s party. When they started dating, he’d loved spending time with her and they quickly became exclusive. She’d invited him into her bed a lot sooner than he’d expected, but he certainly hadn’t objected. Lately, though, there was more arguing than enjoyment. She constantly harped on what he should wear, what he should eat, where he should spend his free time, etcetera. She resented how much time he spent with his family; she’d rather they went to a club or a bar. “Time apart. Yeah, okay.” He stared out the windshield, not seeing anything. “I’ll walk you to your door.”
“No need. I’ll be fine.” She opened her door and got out.
He met her at the front of the car. “I’m walking you to your door, Sloane. I don’t care how mad we are at each other.”
She said nothing until they were on her doorstep. Then she turned to face him. “Thanks. You’re always such a gentleman.” She reached her hands to his shoulders and stood on tip-toe to kiss him softly, her lips barely brushing his. “I’ll see you in a few weeks, okay?”
He nodded, but when she started to step away, he pulled her back and kissed her thoroughly, his tongue sweeping in to meet hers. She complied, but he sensed she wasn’t into it. “Bye, Sloane. Call me when you get back.” He waited until he heard the deadbolt engage, then turned to leave, wondering if their relationship had a future.
***
He was woken before nine the next morning by his phone buzzing insistently on the nightstand. He reached for it, groggy, thinking it must be Sloane wanting to talk before she left town. But the screen showed his brother’s name. Alarm shot through his body as he realized Finn wouldn’t call so early on his day off for something innocuous. “What’s wrong?” He didn’t bother with a greeting. “Is it Sloane?”
“No. It’s Neal.”
Seamus sat up and rubbed his hand over his eyes, trying to understand what his brother was saying. Why would Finn know anything about Neal Braden, his best friend from high school? Before the question could even finish in his mind, the horrible realization of why Finn would be involved hit him, causing him to gasp for breath. “What happened? Is Neal hurt? Is he okay?”
“He’s dead.”
***
Nina
“No, David, I don’t understand. I’m tired of understanding. And I don’t think Lily and Iris are going to understand why you can’t be at their birthday party, either. Dammit, David! This is by far the shittiest thing you’ve done yet!” Besides leaving me and our daughters for another woman. Nina rubbed her temple, behind which a mammoth headache was building. Talking on the phone with her ex-husband was always an ordeal.
“Christ, Nina! You’re making a federal case out of this. The girls don’t care if I’m at their little party. I’ll make it up to them later.”
They would be heartbroken; they adored David and missed him terribly. He would undoubtedly attempt to make it up to them, bringing them extravagant, unnecessary gifts rather than giving them the time and attention they deserved. “Fine, David. Do whatever you want.” He would anyway, no matter how much she nagged or complained; he always did. She never used to consider herself a nag, but she didn’t always recognize the woman she’d become since the divorce. She didn’t always like her, either. The knock on her office door was a welcome reprieve from the irritating conversation. “I have to go. It would be nice if you could make the time to call sometime on Sunday and wish the girls happy birthday.” She hung up before he could find an excuse for not calling. “Come in.” She glanced up, expecting one of her students; she was shocked to see Finn DeLuca at the door. She hadn’t seen any of the DeLucas for over five years. “Finn? Oh, my God! What in the world are you doing here?” She was halfway to him when she saw he wasn’t alone. She stopped in her tracks. His younger brother, Seamus, was with him. Seamus DeLuca, her twin brother’s best friend all through high school and the focus of the most intense crush she’d ever had. Neal and Seamus had drifted apart when they went to different colleges but had reconnected over the last few years. Neal had told her about Seamus, but she hadn’t seen him since graduation. He’d always been good-looking, but he’d matured into an extremely handsome man, with slightly curly brown hair and muscular arms showing beneath the sleeves of his t-shirt. She cringed to remember the ridiculous things she’d done to attract his attention, all to no avail. He’d never shown the slightest interest.
“Nina, hey,” Finn said, looking serious. “I’m afraid I have some bad news.”
Her entire body went cold as she realized a state police detective standing at her office door with bad news meant someone she loved was injured or dead. Names and faces ran through her mind: Lily, Iris, Mom, Dad…Neal. Oh, God! The only reason Seamus would be here was if something had happened to Neal. She crossed the small room to stand in front of them. “Tell me.”
“It’s Neal. He’s dead. He was found early this morning in his office. I’m so sorry, Nina,” Finn said, his demeanor professional, yet sympathetic.
Her knees buckled, and she crumpled to the floor. “No.”
Seamus stepped forward and gently lifted her to her feet. He guided her toward the sofa across from her desk and sat next to her. “God, Nina. I’m so sorry.”
She looked into his handsome, ravaged face and frowned. “I just talked to him yesterday. He can’t be…” She couldn’t say the detestable word. “What happened?”
Finn pulled a chair up and sat. “He was discovered early this morning in his office by one of his employees.”
She barely heard his words through the buzzing in her head. “What do you mean?” She stared between the two men, perplexed and horrified.
Finn sighed heavily. “At this point, it looks like suicide. I’m sorry.”
“Suicide? No, that’s not possible.” Her head shook from side to side and she didn’t seem able to control it. Her hands began to shake, and Seamus reached his over to cover them. “Oh, God, oh, God.” She realized she was whimpering, but she couldn’t stop. She began to rock back and forth, but Seamus slipped his strong arm around her and pulled her against his warmth. She stopped rocking as the sobs racked her body. She had no idea how much time passed, but she finally felt a wad of tissues being stuffed into her hand and saw Finn place a glass of water on the table in front of her. “Thank you.” She sat up, wiped her face, and reached for the water. “Please, Finn. Tell me what happened.”
“The call came in around eight this morning from security at RiskCom.” He referred to the computer security company Neal and his business partner, Gordon Sanderson, had started three years before. “Neal’s secretary arrived at her normal time and was surprised to see Neal’s car already in the parking lot. She said he was in his office when she got to her desk, but his door was locked, and he didn’t answer when she knocked. Appa
rently, he’d been known to spend the night on his couch, so she left him alone. But when he still hadn’t appeared an hour later and didn’t respond to her knocks or calls, she had security open the door.” Finn stood and ran his hands through his hair. “He was slumped over his desk, dead. It looks like he shot himself. He left a note. We tried to contact your parents, but we couldn’t reach them.”
“They’re on a cruise,” she said numbly. “I can’t believe this. Seamus? Neal would never…oh, God!” She took a moment to gather her composure, breathing deeply and clearing her throat. She could fall apart later, when she was alone. “Do I need to go somewhere and, I don’t know, identify him or anything?” She’d never had to deal with death before and had no idea what to do.
“No. Seamus took care of that.”
She leaned into his warmth again. “I’m sorry. That must have been awful.” She felt him nod and swallow hard, and knew this had to be horrible for him too. She slipped her small hand into his much larger, rough palm and squeezed. “Why? Why would Neal do this? I thought he was happy.”
“I don’t know, Nina. I just saw him last week and he seemed fine. If I’d known…ah, Jesus!” He swallowed convulsively, and she knew he was struggling against his own tears.
Finn coughed and stood. “I’m gonna head out. Seamus, can you—”
“Yeah, of course. I got this.”
Finn told her he’d be in touch soon and left, closing her office door quietly behind him.
She and Seamus sat, arms around each other, for endless moments. Finally, she spoke. “I can’t believe this is happening. Please say this isn’t real.”
“I wish it wasn’t.” He stood and grabbed a handful of tissues for himself. “When will your parents be back from their cruise?”
