by Ali Parker
"Please. My Fred's been dead ten years, and there are days when I miss him like crazy, but most days... I'm singing hallelujah for the quiet. The man was a horn-ball and a half." She grunted and walked toward her office, leaving me to stand in shock. She was as unpredictable as the wind.
"More than I needed to know, Eliza."
"Dr. Turner to you, boy."
I chuckled and walked into my office with just enough time to grab my files and march back up to Dean Durham's office. His secretary gave me a curt smile and nodded to the vacant chairs outside of his office.
"He'll be right with you, Dr. Tarrington."
"Great, thanks." I sat down and stifled the desire to tell her that her hair looked nice. It did, but there was no way in hell I was giving out compliments. Everything I said got taken the wrong way, no matter how innocent my words were. Between falling in love with Ana six years before and having one of my junior students allege rape against me two years after that... I was blacklisted. Nothing I did or said was ever taken at face value again, no matter the fact that everything was cleared up and cleaned up in both situations.
"Kendal. Come on in, buddy." Mark leaned out of his open door and extended his hand to me as I walked into his oversized office. The large bull head sitting on the wall never failed to pull a chuckle from me. "You laughing at my talents?" He glanced up at it with pride in his eyes.
"It smells like a goat in here, Mark." I dropped down in the seat in front of his desk and smiled. "You been hunting lately."
"Hell no. My wife is pregnant again. I swear I'm going to have to get both of us fixed to make this shit stop." He snorted and pulled out a file.
"Or stop being so active." I shrugged as he glanced up. He was the only other man in our department and to say we were close would be an understatement. His support was about all I had going for me outside of Eliza's trust and friendship.
"Fuck that." He opened the file. "Speaking of..."
"I'm not talking about my sex life with you. That had to be the most uncomfortable hour of my existence last month. Leave it be." I rolled my eyes as he gave me a quirky smile. The bastard was a Kappa Alpha, and though he was ten years older than me, brothers were brothers for life in the fraternity. He honored that... and I did too.
"Fine, but my wife has a cousin that-"
"No. Let's talk about this new master's class you guys are finally letting me teach."
"Eliza told you? That old goat. I wanted to tell you." He got up and walked toward his bookshelf, pulling something off and handing it to me. "Here is the curriculum. It's electronic too, and I'll have Eliza unlock the files for you, but I know you like the smell of old shit, so there's the book for you to enjoy as well."
I laughed and took the book from him. "What else am I here for?"
A knock at the door resounded behind me, and I stiffened.
"We have a new financial accounting professor joining us seeing that Daisy Jackson decided to up and quit last week."
"Daisy quit? Why?" I turned in my seat as he opened the door and glanced over his shoulder. His thick upper body blocked my view from seeing who was standing on the other side, but the shapely legs I could see had my attention.
"Family problems. You're going to mentor our new professor." He turned and spoke to the woman for a few minutes as I tried to figure out how I was going to nicely tell him no. Where we were close enough to talk sex, women and past failures, he was still my boss.
I stood up and figured I would suck it up and help him out until we found someone else to do it. No reason to deny him my help when I had the time and he'd finally come through on the promise to give me an advanced class to teach. Hopefully the woman's legs were no prediction of her body. I didn't need a fox beside me to tempt me into being the man I was in college. I'd buried him in the sand six years back, and fuck if he didn't try to poke his ugly head up from time to time.
"Kendal, this is Heather Turner. She's from UCLA and has been highly recommended for this new spot with us. You'll be her mentor until she gets her feet wet." He moved back, and I nearly choked. Not only was she ten steps past gorgeous, but I didn't need an introduction at all. Heather was the vice president of the sister-sorority that partied right alongside the Kappa's back in college. The number of times Damon and I had taken turns fucking the woman was embarrassing.
My luck couldn't have gotten any worse.
I extended my hand and gave her a warm smile. Maybe six years of life had forced both of us to grow up and move away from being the sluts we were in college.
"I'm Kendal. Nice to meet you." I'd have to feign ignorance about who she was. Hopefully I'd changed enough to get by on a wing and a prayer.
"Nice to meet you too. I've read up on you and your research on just-in-time inventory. Riveting stuff." Her smile was genuine.
I sighed internally. She didn't remember me, or if she did, she was playing it off really well. Good. Drunk sex in the back of a car or in a laundry mat or... I let my thoughts go. Whatever we'd done in the past was locked back there with every other stupid decision I'd made.
"Thanks." I turned to Mark. "All right, man. I'm off to teach brilliant young minds how to better balance their income statements. Need anything else from me?"
"Just show Heather to her office and we'll be good." He patted my back and smiled at Heather. "Welcome, Dr. Turner. You're in good hands."
She smiled. "Thanks. I'm sure I am."
I held the door for her and moved up beside her as she glanced over at me with a smile on her pretty lips. Dark red hair billowed over her shoulders and down her back, silky hair that I'd gripped tightly too many times to forget.
"So why Dallas? California seems so much better." I pressed the button on the elevator and turned to face her.
"I was ready to come home." She took a step toward me as her eyes narrowed a little. Fuck. She was playing in front of Mark. "I'm quite thrilled to hear I'm not only in good hands, but ones that know exactly where I like to be touched."
I swallowed hard and glanced over my shoulder. "Heather... that was the past. We're grown up now and I'm not interested in-"
"Tough." She smiled and pulled a card from her purse. "You're not married, nor are you dating."
"How do you-"
"I checked." She tucked the card in my clasped hands and leaned in closer, breathing in deeply. "You know how many times I called out your name while I fucked myself?"
"Heather," I whispered, lost to how much I enjoyed being a bastard with the beautiful woman in front of me.
"Right. You know, don't you?" Her dark blue eyes studied me, the look in them leaving my stomach turning. I was in deep shit - Again.
I moved back as she got into the elevator and let the door shut. I'd have to tell Mark that I couldn't mentor her in any way, shape or form. She was the same slutty girl I'd owned all four years of college when Damon wasn't busy owning her. I hated myself for being a part of something so vile - using women for pleasure and making them beg for the next round.
Bile rose in my throat as I walked down the stairs and pulled my phone from my pocket to call my best friend.
"This is Damon."
"Do you not have my name in your phone? What the fuck?" I barked into the phone as I looked for a quiet place to sit.
"Oh wow. Someone's pissed in your cheerios. Let me guess, you're in love with your stepsister, who works for you, is at every fucking family dinner, and she's over you. That your deal? Oh no, wait... that's my dicked up life."
I dropped down on a bench and let out a painful sigh as I pressed my free hand to my face. "I'm sorry. Fucking Heather Turner just walked into the accounting office as the new Accounting professor, and of course I'm assigned to be her fucking mentor. I can't look at her without seeing jizz all over her face and tits. I'm going to hell."
"You're a man. Fuck the woman and make her beg for more, Kendal. She's a grown woman and isn't one of your students. Get laid and call me back."
"You're an asshole, you know
that?" I dropped the call and closed my eyes tightly. Why couldn't something work out? Anything? Fucking Damon. He deserved that shit with Bethany. She was too good of a woman for him anyway.
I should know. Every woman on the fucking planet was too good for me.
"Piece of shit," I mumbled under my breath, hating myself more than I had in a long while.
Funny how the past could remind you of who you were trying not to be in the future.
Chapter 6
Dana
The smell of bacon and eggs woke me up the next morning, my stomach grumbling loudly at the idea of something beyond delicious to start the day. I rolled onto my back and let out a long sigh. Cameron's side of the bed was made already, his pillow in its place. What I wouldn't give to wake up to a man wrapped around me, his body hard and ready for another round of what happened the night before. Where I couldn't help but tease Jackie about everything in her world being about sex, the truth of the matter is that I was hella jealous. Love seemed a far off desire, incapable of being reached by the average commoner, but sex? Lust? They were waiting for a spin around the dance floor of life, and weren't choosy at all about which partners they got.
So why not me? I slid my hands over my breasts and down my stomach to linger at the top of my panties. How nice it would have been to lay there and enjoy the softness of my skin, the tight warmth between my thighs, but by the sound of things down the hall, Cameron was still there. He'd frowned upon the idea of masturbation a hundred times over the last few years, as if he was the only man on the earth that didn't give in to self-love.
"You need to get up," he hollered down the hall. "I'm leaving soon."
"All right. You're right." I groaned as I rolled onto my side and moved to the edge of the bed before sitting up. I pulled on a pair of sleeping pants from the floor and worked my long hair into a ponytail before walking into the kitchen. There was no point in prancing around in my panties. That would only leave me turned on by the possibility of him being turned on, which wasn't going to happen. He was far too much of a practical kind of guy to allow for spontaneous sex.
"I usually am." He smiled over at me and got up with his empty plate in his hands.
I walked into the kitchen, half expecting to see cold eggs and bacon sitting in the pan for me. That would have been upsetting, but seeing nothing on the stove was disturbing.
"Did you not think I would want breakfast?" I turned to face him.
He brushed his napkin by his lips and tossed his trash before moving toward me and sliding his hands over my shoulders.
"You don't need bacon and eggs, baby. You're trying to stick to your diet this time, remember? You asked for my help, so I'm giving it. Don't give me that sad look. I'm here to help you like you requested. If you don't want my help, don't ask for it." He leaned down and kissed my forehead like a brother or father might.
I didn't have words as he released me, picked up a grapefruit and tossed it over his shoulder to me.
He didn't say another word as he grabbed his briefcase and whistled as he walked out of the apartment, leaving me standing there in shock. Where I had most certainly asked for his help in watching what I ate a few months back, he was going overboard with it - so much so that I wanted to crawl back under my covers and hide from the world. Surely it would be better for everyone if I did.
My phone buzzed, saving me from a torrential meltdown. I put the grapefruit back in the fruit basket and picked it up before sitting down on the couch and answering.
"Hi Mom," I mumbled as I leaned back and closed my eyes.
"Hi baby. I haven't talked to you in three days. Tell me everything. How's school? Work? Cameron?"
The negative energy buzzing through me started to dissipate at the sound of my mother's voice. She was a strong Hispanic woman with a hard past and a great love story thanks to my dad. She didn't appreciate drama or too many tears, but then again, she'd been raised by a mother that felt the same way.
"The internship is great, but isn't really a job, Mom."
"I know, but you're still getting paid, right?"
"No, but they are helping to fund the rest of my semester. Being poor helps you get grants. Remember I was telling you about this financial aid stuff."
"Yes, yes. How is your man? Are you cooking more often like I told you to?"
"No, Mom. I'm working at the hospital a lot and trying to do most of my business classes by correspondence. I can't come home and cook a meal for Cameron morning, noon and night. Besides, he's a health nut. He wouldn't like what I know how to cook."
"What?" She huffed. "What's wrong with the food I taught you to cook?"
"It's either Mexican or southern fried food, momma. He's into woks and vegetables right now."
"Did he Asian on you?"
"Mom. Really?" I rolled my eyes and got up from the couch. "How is Kevin?"
"Good. Being an ass. What's new?" She chuckled. My little brother was a big handful and always had been. Little was an understatement seeing that he was twice as big as any of the other men in my extended family.
"And my sister?" I walked to the kitchen and pulled out the bacon. The thought of frying it and pouring the bacon grease on Cameron's perfectly made side of the bed had me second-guessing my thoughts of wanting marriage and kids with the jerk. He hadn't started out so controlling and condescending, but after getting comfortable, it would seem the real him had come shining through.
No thanks.
"How are your classes doing? Are you still thinking of double doing it?"
"Double majoring?" I smiled as my mother cursed me in Spanish. "I'm graduating in May, momma. I'll have both degrees and finally be done."
"And then we'll get married and have some bambinos?"
"Yes, Mom." I turned on the stove and tried not to dive into a conversation over how much my heart hurt. It wouldn't be received well by my strong-willed mother. She was too old-school for talking about feelings. "I gotta go or I'll be late."
"Never be late. It shows your unwillingness to finish anything."
"Okay Mom." I rolled my eyes and dropped the call. There was no way in hell I was going to marry someone like Cameron. "So what are you doing with him now?"
I had no clue. Protection? Apathy? Loneliness?
The image of Amanda's handsome brother rolled through my mind. I couldn't imagine why he was alone, but maybe his story was similar to mine. Maybe he had a girlfriend that took him for granted, treated him like trash, acted as if his feelings didn't matter at all.
"What's your story, Kendal?" I turned to the stove and made a breakfast that would make Cameron cringe.
*
"Why do you let him talk to you like that?" Jackie walked beside me as we finished making our rounds together.
"What exactly am I supposed to say? I did ask for help on watching my weight." I put my hands on my hips and tried to keep my voice down.
"Helping someone with their diet is different than demeaning them. You don't even need to be on a diet. You look great, Dana. So you have curves... kick-ass awesome. Most men would love to latch on to your hips or your ass while fucking you half the night. Don't you know how this works?"
Heat burned my neck and face as a group of doctors walked through the hall, the youngest-looking one turning to look over his shoulder and smile.
"Ahh... you're so fucking embarrassing." I ran my hand over the top of my hair and tried to think of some way to get away from her. I loved Jackie like a sister, but she was far too open for me. My family was close, but we didn't talk about intimate things - ever.
"Dana! They need an extra set of hands in the ER. Go. Now." One of the older nurses, whose name I couldn't remember to save my damn life, yelled from the nurses’ station at me.
I turned and jogged toward the stairs instead of the elevator. Seven flights of stairs later, I was sucking wind like a freight train going uphill. I forced myself to jog toward the ER and swallow my need to lay down and beg for an oxygen mask. Cameron was right about o
ne thing... I did need to get in better shape. Not for the way I looked, but for my job.
"Are you Dana?" A nurse jogged past me, not stopping to confirm the answer to her question.
"Yes." I turned and picked up my walk to a run to keep up with her.
"Good. Second room on the left. Public bus got flipped over in an accident. We have about thirty injured. We just need extra hands on deck. Assist Dr. Parks with anything he needs." She moved down the hall as I stopped and ducked into the OR room.
The handsome young guy washing his hands furiously glanced up and smiled. "Dana?"
"Yes, Sir." I moved up beside him and washed my hands as well. "I'm just an intern."
"Well, today you're going to be just a doctor’s extra hands like any great nurse would be. That sound good?" His smile was contagious, and I could see why Jackie was so ga-ga over him. He was sexy in a playboy way, but his warmth radiated around the room.
"Anything you need." I nodded, washed my hands and helped him with his gloves before we moved into the operating room.
"Great answer." He moved to the other side of the body on the table and started barking out commands. I moved to the sound of his voice, the message in his directives. Everyone did. He worked efficiently, and within a matter of minutes had multiple repairs done to the woman below us.
He glanced up and winked at me. "You ready for the next one?"
"Am I with you for the rest of the day?"
"Yep, and I bite, so watch out, okay?" He chuckled, and I couldn't help but smile. Maybe New York was a good move for Jackie, hell, maybe it was a good move for me.
"Don't make promises you don't keep." I went for ballsy and followed him and two other nurses out into the wash room. After scrubbing down, we reloaded for the next person that got brought in.
"Are you studying to be a nurse or doctor?" He glanced up and lifted his hands toward me. I helped him get into a new pair of gloves and followed him back into the room.
"A nurse for now. I'm graduating with a double major. Two bachelors next May."
