“Real?” I said the word out loud like it was something foreign I couldn’t translate.
“Yeah, fuckin’ real. What we had was real, Mari. Don’t you take that away, not only for us, but for our daughter.”
I paused thinking it over.
“I fuckin’ loved you, Mari. You’re the only woman I ever gave myself to. Yeah, you turned your back on that on the word of your brother. I’m workin’ on comin’ to terms with that. If I never cared, I promise you,” he stopped speaking and really looked deeply at me. “I promise you that you’d be dead. Anyone who crosses me, I end. If I never loved you, Mari, you’d have been dead before Maricio ever put the bullet in our daughter.”
I gasped at his honest admission.
“I’m a lot of things. And ruthless is one of them. If you weren’t the only woman who has ever captured my attention, not just my cock, then I wouldn’t hesitate to end you. So know going in, I plan to end your brother. I will not pause. I will not reconsider. There is no negotiation. Maricio goes down. You’re either in or you’re out.”
I swallowed down the lump building in my throat. “You loved me?”
“With everything I had I fuckin’ loved you.”
“I’m sorry,” I whispered the words trying to absorb the weight of his intense emotions.
“The past is done. We can’t reverse the clock. Some people would walk away from bad shit and say they were a better man from it. I’m not. I’m not a better man in losing you or our daughter getting shot because of me. I’m a fuckin’ monster to let my world touch either of you. I can’t change it, but I can find retribution for you and for me.”
The fierce way he declared everything took some getting used to. Javi was the man in charge now. He didn’t go with the flow;, he set the pattern to which everyone else followed.
“I never knew what to think,” I told him as my mind fought to sort out everything. So much time had passed, so much hurt had been shared between us.
“While Paco was a snake, I do hope he gave you and Yesnia some happiness.”
I raised my eyebrow at him. “Paco? Maricio introduced him as Yesnia’s grandfather when she started to ask questions, but truly he was not involved.”
“You and Paco weren’t a thing? You know he loved you. You didn’t fuck him?”
“No!” I almost jumped out of my skin at the thought. “He tried and I rejected him. I couldn’t trust him.”
Javi laughed. “Well, the information I got was at least incorrect.”
Things between us got quiet and the air intensified between us.
“Javi, there’s been no one for me, but you.”
The words left my lips before his consumed mine in a kiss of passion, fight, and maybe even love.
Chapter Ten
Javier
Backing her to the bed, I laid over her. I gave once again and she took. I had been a walking dead man, for how long now? I was dead inside. Numb. Lost.
Mari gave me life.
Vida.
Within moments she was writhing under me. I pulled back, lifting her shirt. She removed it as I stood to remove my own clothing. She managed to be naked in seconds, as was I. Not wanting to lose this feeling, I began massaging her feet. Using my thumb on the arch and ball, I applied light pressure, her body relaxed in front of me.
Pressing soft kisses to her ankle, I moved up her legs. At her thigh, I grazed the inside sensitive skin with my teeth as I thoroughly rubbed her skin.
I could smell her arousal as I spread her legs and sucked hard on her inner thigh just before her pussy lips. I ran my nose over her dampened pussy, relishing in her desire for me. My rock hard cock begged to slide inside her wet heat, but I continued on.
Her breathing became irregular and I looked up to find her twisting her nipples between her fingers. Lost in lust, we both were consumed in the moment.
I fucking loved it.
She was gone with me into a place where the hurt from the past couldn’t touch us. The tension of our loss didn’t exist. We were in this moment together, closing out the world.
Gripping her hips, I pulled her to my face as I worked my nose between her pussy lips and shook my head. I was diving in like a man starved for this cunt, even though I had already had it once today already.
She rocked into my face seeking the release that we both felt was right there. Her soft curls were coated in her juices and my saliva as I devoured her. I wanted her to come on my face and then on my cock. I couldn’t think of anything else except her losing all control under me.
Tasting, tempting, teasing, and testing, I ravished her pussy. Then, pulling her lips apart, I blew on her swollen nub before sucking hard.
She shuddered under me as I slid one finger into her wet heat and then worked her until I added a second finger, stretching her more. Licking then sucking, I worked her clit as I pumped my fingers in and out of her. It didn’t take long before she cried out as she clenched around my digits, and her legs trembled around my face.
I swallowed down every drop of her essence, only wanting more.
Slowly, I removed my fingers. Placing light kisses over her hips and stomach I worked my way up to her face. She was limp in satisfaction as I found her lips and kissed her.
“Taste yourself. Taste how good we are together,” I growled as my tongue danced with hers.
My cock throbbed, ready to feel what my fingers just experienced. I willed myself to relax. I rolled us over, moving Mari to straddle me.
Her eyes met mine and everything we ever shared flashed before me. Her love was there as bold as mine. I began to tease her pussy with my thumbs as she moved. Propping herself up a little, she slid my large cock inside her. Slowly, inch by inch, she took me in.
With her eyes locked to mine as she joined our bodies, I felt the sparks between us. The air was thick with our desire and something deeper. For a moment, I almost begged her not to move, afraid I might come too quickly.
Her pussy was like a mold made to take my cock.
She began to move slowly up and down. Fluidly she rocked. It was a gentle torture of the very best kind. My cock throbbed and swelled as my orgasm built.
She rolled her hips in a circular fashion as her pussy milked my cock. I pinched her nipples, sending her crying out my name as her pussy clamped down on my dick like a vice.
I shot my seed deep inside her womb as she dropped over me exhausted.
“Fuck,” I roared as she fell over me. “You make me lose my mind.”
She sat up and I could see the concern in her eyes. “Am I not doing something right?”
I looked at her with bewilderment as I watched the insecurities take over.
Mari blew out an exasperated breath. “I haven’t had any lovers but you, and that was so long ago.”
I rolled us over so she was pinned beneath me. “I’ve never tasted someone so sweet and salty. I’ve never had a woman make me forget my business, my vengeance. You make me get so lost in you, Mari, I forget everything, including our pain.”
“We should probably stop doing this,” she muttered shyly.
“Or we should hit the road, find Maricio to make him pay, and celebrate with each other as much as possible.”
She gave me a half smile. “I’m ready when you are.”
I could still sense some hesitation. “I’ve always wrapped up except with you. I’m clean, so if you’re worried about that, no need.”
Some of her tenseness seemed to ease. “Let’s clean up and hit the road. I don’t want to lie here making promises we won’t keep, or even thinking this could be something more than two people who share a past getting lost for a bit together.”
Her dismissal stung, but she was right. We didn’t need to get mixed up in making promises to each other or catching feelings from the past.
Giving her time to clean up, I too cleaned myself in my bathroom and dressed again. In a matter of an hour, we were on the road headed south.
We would find Maricio Dominguez and make
him pay.
The trail he had blazed wasn’t predictable. From what my people could sort out, he went from city to city chasing drugs.
We left Chicago late in the day, so we weren’t on the road too long before I went ahead and made a stop in Indiana for the night.
At the hotel, I checked us in and carried our bags. Mari followed quietly. During the car ride, she hadn’t said much either, which I found a little strange.
“We can keep going,” she told me as we entered the room.
“I have a man on him. We need to rest so that when we find him we aren’t apt to make any mistakes.”
Stepping into the space, she took in the suite. Her eyes grew wide with wonder. She went into the bedroom area where she traced her hand over the king size bed. I moved back into the living area and kitchenette to grab a bottle of water. While I had stayed in larger places in the past, this one was nice for the night.
After a few moments, I went into the bedroom to find Mari had moved into the bathroom. Wanting to check on her, I entered the space to find her bent over the Jacuzzi tub filling it with water.
She looked at me over her shoulder. “Sorry, I couldn’t resist.”
My mind went back to the past.
I entered the bathroom at home to find Mari in the bathtub. “Mi cielo.” My voice made her jump, sloshing water everywhere. “Not a more beautiful sight,” I muttered removing my sunglasses and throwing them to the floor as I closed the distance between us to where she was with her chest out of the water. Her nipples were erect in the cool air and my cock hardened as she covered herself, realizing her exposure.
“Javi.” Her voice was raspy with desire.
“Are you getting ready for your party?” I asked, moving to the side of the tub and reaching in to find her sponge.
She blinked rapidly before getting herself under control. “Yes, just relaxing,” she said, trying to sound casual.
I knew better.
I moved the loofah sponge to her neck where I grazed the skin before massaging her neck with my hands. I worked all her knots out until she was relaxed beneath my fingers. I dropped the loofah and in reaching for it, I touched her tits. Her breathing picked up as her body came alive.
Gently, I pushed her down in the water and moved to grab her foot.
“No!” She panicked. “I have to shave my legs.
I smiled at the memory.
“Would you like me to shave your legs, mi cielo?”
She swallowed hard. I smiled.
“It’s okay, mi cielo. You need to rest. I just saw you, the tub, and well, my mind went back to when things were just beginning.”
“Your sky. It’s been so long since you’ve called me that.”
I shook my head, not really sure what to say. “Like the clouds, you have changed shape, but you still float above me no matter where I go or what I do.”
“You are so many things, Javi. Sometimes you’re hard, sometimes you give me soft. Sometimes you’re deep and I have to read what you’re saying and other times you simply say what you mean and mean what you say.”
“The same could be said for you, Mari,” I replied, leaning against the door jam.
“We can’t get back what we lost.”
I ran my hand over the back of my neck trying to relieve the building tension. “I don’t imagine we could.”
She turned the water off and stood straight up. “So what happens after we find Maricio?”
I pushed away from the door jam and stood with my arms crossed in front of me. “I kill him. We go home.”
“And?”
I shrugged my shoulders.
“I have no home, no daughter. Javi, I have no life.”
“You do what you want. If that means going back to school, I’ll pay for it. If you just want a house in the Hamptons, well, I’ll arrange it, but I’m not visiting.”
Her eyes grew huge. “Javi, until you took me, I didn’t travel except when Maricio made us move. I was quiet the whole car ride because it’s the first time I could sit in a car without worrying about Maricio driving high or worrying over the safety of my daughter. This hotel is the largest hotel room I’ve ever seen. Don’t give me options that are so great when my world has been so small.”
“How ‘bout you climb in that tub and don’t think about what lies ahead? How ‘bout we face each challenge as it comes? Can you just let it all go down the drain with that water tonight and we’ll sort shit as it comes?”
She paused taking in my words. “Can you really forgive what I did in keeping Yesnia from you?”
I nodded. “Yes, I can and I have. While it hurts because I lost so much with her, I can’t be angry with you. You blessed me by giving her life. Maricio took that, not you, not me. He’s to blame for the loss. I wish I could turn back time and we could have raised her together, but I have to believe everything happens for a reason.”
“I’m trying to hold onto the faith that there was a reason for her death.”
“Take your bath, Mari. Relax. We will face Maricio tomorrow and we need to be alert. He’s sneaky and will do anything to stay alive. If he can hurt me in the process, that’s even better for him.”
She approached and wrapped her arms around my waist, pulling me close. “We’re gonna get through this, Javi,” she whispered as she hugged me.
I embraced her close and inhaled the scent of her shampoo, memorizing the moment. We didn’t have many and I wanted to treasure what I could while I had it.
Aurelio was right. It was best Yesnia wasn’t in my world. Even if the sacrifice was the greatest of my life. The same would be best for Mari. While it would hurt, I would have to let her go. She didn’t need to be consumed by the life I chose to lead. One where she would be viewed as a key or the ticket to taking me down. It would put her in constant danger.
That wasn’t the man I was. I would keep her safe, even from me.
Chapter Eleven
Mari Belle
The water engulfed my body. It felt heavenly to sink down in the tub as I tried to push all my worries away. While I couldn’t shake the thoughts flooding my head, my body found comfort submerged in the hot liquid.
Behind us was Chicago, and ahead of us were a road unpaved and a path unknown to find my brother. It felt good not to be confined to Javi’s house sitting and waiting.
We were finally going after Maricio. I wasn’t anxious as in nervous, but rather in a hurry to get to him. I wanted justice for my daughter. There were many times I wanted to question Javi on why he wasn’t tracking Maricio, but I knew better than to push the issue.
In our culture it wasn’t a common thing for a woman to question a man in the first place, much less the completely fucked up situation Javi and I were in.
I also wasn’t sure he would give me an answer if I asked anyway. Mainly because our situation was rocky, at best. It was easy to get lost with him. It was hard to face the thoughts of a future with or without him.
I went into this wanting Javi to hurt. I wanted to inflict as much pain as possible. Except as time passed, I saw he was hurting far more all on his own than he would from anything I was capable of doing. I could sense his struggles. Even after all this time, somehow we were still connected enough that I managed to read some of his emotions.
Like tonight. I could feel his confliction about me, about us, and his pain became my pain about Yesnia. We were both hurting and broken. It was like our souls were scorched, seared, and dying off from sadness.
Javi left me alone after our shared moment. While my body craved more from him, my mind was thankful to have some time to process things. Sometimes everyone just needed time alone. It was a chance to press the reset button on my emotions.
In a matter of time, I would be face to face with my brother again.
The man who took everything from me would be sharing the same space and the very same air as me.
The same man I once looked up to.
Our mother used to tell us, we only had one brother/sist
er. We only had each other and we needed to rely on the other for strength and be encouraging. She didn’t tolerate fighting between us.
When we were kids, Maricio did so much for me. Like teaching me to ride a bike. I remember the times Javi and Maricio spent holding the bike up and running beside me until I got comfortable. They found my bike in a dumpster, so I didn’t have training wheels and we certainly couldn’t afford to buy any. Those two put their heads together to teach me. Maricio always said he didn’t want me missing out on anything because of our situation. If our father wasn’t going to be the man of the house, he would. Since Javi’s dad was gone too, they both took their role as my protectors and teachers seriously.
It wasn’t just because Javi was doing things for me. Sometimes Maricio was there for me all on his own.
There was the time I lost my two front teeth on the same day eating an apple. I was at lunch and some kids were picking on me. Maricio took me to the library after the rumors got to him about his sister crying in the cafeteria. He scanned magazines, showing me pictures of celebrities and telling me when my teeth came in and I grew up I would be more beautiful than anyone.
When everything crashed around us the day my mother died, it was Javi and Maricio who stood up and took care of me. Maricio despite his own sadness, took time to continually check on me for himself even though Javi never left my side. Maricio was someone I once felt had my back no matter what. I used to think there wasn’t anything I couldn’t tell him. We used to be so close I felt like there wasn’t anything I couldn’t face because I had my brother at my side.
Then Maricio changed. I lost my brother years ago, if I ever truly had him. It was like all the years we had were an illusion. I felt like our bond wasn’t even real and maybe I imagined the entire thing. He was so consumed by his envy of Javi. I wondered through the years if anything would have changed Maricio, or if his jealousy drove him beyond the point that anyone or anything could turn him back to the right path.
Cartel Queen (Almanza Crime Family Duet Book 2) Page 8
