I looked away then, backdown at the smear. I heard him sigh.
Then, “I am going to send you home now,” he said. “Saddle your horse and take provisions. Ride to a place outside Amber-any place, fairly isolated.”
“My tomb?”
He snorted and chuckled faintly.
“That will do. Go there and wait my pleasure. I have some thinking to do.”
I stood. He reached out and placed his right hand on my shoulder. The jewel was pulsing. He looked into my eyes.
“No man can have everything he wants the way that he wants it,” he said.
And there was a distancing effect, as of the power of a Trump, only working in reverse. I heard voices, then about me I saw the room I had earlier departed. Benedict, Gerard, Random and Dara were still there. I felt Dad release my shoulder. Then he was gone and I was among them once again.
“What is the story?” Random said. “We saw Dad sending you back. By the way, how did he do that?”
“I do not know,” I said. “But he confirms what Dara has told us. He gave her the signet and the message.”
“Why?” Gerard asked.
“He wanted us to learn to trust her,” I said.
Benedict rose to his feet.
“Then I will go and do as I have been bid.”
“He wants you to attack, then fall back,” Dara said. “After that, it will only be necessary to contain them.”
“For how long?”
“He said only that this will become apparent.”
Benedict gave one of his rare smiles and nodded. He managed his card case with his one hand, removed the deck, thumbed out the special Trump I had given him for the Courts.
“Good luck,” Random said.
“Yes,” Gerard agreed.
I added my wishes and watched him fade. When his rainbow afterimage had vanished I looked away and noticed that Dara was crying silently. I did not remark on it.
“I, too, have orders now-of a sort,” I said. “I had best be moving.”
“And I will get back to the sea,” said Gerard.
“No,” I heard Dara say as I was moving toward the door.
I halted.
“You are to remain here, Gerard, and see to the safety of Amber herself. No attack will come by sea.”
“But I thought Random was in charge of the local defense.”
She shook her head.
“Random is to join Julian in Arden.”
“Are you sure?” Random asked.
“I am certain.”
“Good,” he said. “It is nice to know he at least thought of me. Sorry, Gerard. That's the breaks.”
Gerard simply looked puzzled.
“I hope he knows what he is doing,” he said.
“We have been through that already,” I told him. “Good-bye.”
I heard a footfall as I left the room. Dara was beside me.
“What now?” I asked her.
“I thought I would walk with you, wherever you are going.”
“I am just going up the hall to get some supplies. Then I am heading for the stables.”
“I will go with you.”
“I am riding alone.”
“I could not accompany you, anyway. I still have to speak with your sisters.”
“They're included, huh?”
“Yes.”
We walked in silence for a time, then she said, “The whole business was not so cold-blooded as it seemed, Corwin.”
We entered the supply room.
“What business?”
“You know what I mean.”
“Oh. That. Well, good.”
“I like you. It could be more than that one day, if you feel anything.”
My pride handed me a snappy reply, but I bit it back. One learns a few things over the centuries. She had used me, true, but then it seemed she had not been entirely a free agent at the time. The worst that might be said, I suppose, was that Dad wanted me to want her. But I did not let my resentment on this interfere with what my own feelings really were, or could become.
So, “I like you, too,” I said, and I looked at her. She seemed as if she needed to be kissed just then, so I did.
“I had better get ready now.”
She smiled and squeezed my arm. Then she was gone. I decided not to examine my feelings just then. I got some things together.
I saddled Star and rode back up over the crest of Kolvir until I came to my tomb. Seated outside it, I smoked my pipe and watched the clouds. I felt I had had a very full day, and it was still early afternoon. Premonitions played tag in the grottoes of my mind, none of which I would have cared to take to lunch.
CHAPTER 3
Contact came suddenly as I sat drowsing. I was on my feet in an instant. It was Dad.
“Corwin, I have made my decisions and the time has come,” he said. “Bare your left arm.”
I did this, as his form continued to grow in substantiality, looking more and more regal the while, a strange sadness on his face, of a sort I had never seen there before.
He took hold of my arm with his left hand and drew his dagger with his right.
I watched as he cut my arm, then resheathed his blade. The blood came forth, and he cupped his left hand and caught it. He released my arm, covered his left hand with his right and drew away from me. Raising his hands to his face, he blew his breath into them and drew them quickly apart.
A crested red bird the size of a raven, its feathers all the color of my blood, stood on his hand, moved to his wrist, looked at me. Even its eyes were red, and there was a look of familiarity as it cocked its head and regarded me.
“He is Corwin, the one you must follow,” he told the bird. “Remember him.”
Then he transferred it to his left shoulder, from whence it continued to stare at me, making no effort to depart.
“You must go now, Corwin,” he said, “quickly. Mount your horse and ride south, passing into Shadow as soon as you can. Hellride. Get as far away from here as possible.”
“Where am I going, Father?” I asked him.
“To the Courts of Chaos. You know the way?”
“In theory. I have never ridden the distance.”
He nodded slowly.
“Then get moving,” he said. “I want you to create as great a time differential as you can between this place and yourself.”
“All right,” I said, “but I do not understand.”
“You will, when the time comes.”
“But there is an easier way,” I protested. “I can get there faster and with a lot less bother simply by getting in touch with Benedict with his Trump and having him take me through.”
“No good,” Dad said. “It will be necessary for you to take the longer route because you will be carrying something which will be conveyed to you along the way.”
“Conveyed? How?”
He reached up and stroked the red bird's feathers.
“By your friend here. He could not fly all the way to the Courts-not in time, that is.”
“What will he bring me?”
“The Jewel. I doubt that I will be able to effect the transfer myself when I have finished what I have to do with it. Its powers may be of some benefit to us in that place.”
“I see,” I said. “But I still need not ride the entire distance. I can Trump through after I receive it.”
“I fear not. Once I have done what must be done here, the Trumps will all become inoperative for a period of time.”
“Why?”
“Because the entire fabric of existence will be undergoing an alteration. Move now, damn it! Get on your horse and ride!”
I stood and stared a moment longer.
“Father, is there no other way?”
He simply shook his head and raised his hand. He began to fade.
“Good-bye.”
I turned and mounted. There was more to say, but it was too late. I turned Star toward the trail that would take me southward.
While Da
d was able to play with the stuff of Shadow atop Kolvir, I had never been able to. I required a greater distance from Amber in order to work the shifts.
Still, knowing that it could be done, I felt that I ought to try. So, working my way southward across bare stone and down rocky passes where the wind howled, I sought to warp the fabric or being about me as I headed toward the trail that led to Garnath.
...A small clump of blue flowers as I rounded a stony shoulder.
I grew excited at this, for they were a modest part of my working. I continued to lay my will upon the world to come beyond each twisting of my way.
A shadow from a triangular stone, across my path... A shifting of the wind...
Some of the smaller ones were indeed working. A backward twist to the trail... A crevice... An ancient bird's nest, high on a rocky shelf... More of the blue flowers... Why not? A tree... Another...
I felt the power moving within me. I worked more changes.
A thought came to me then, concerning my newfound strength. It seemed possible that it might have been purely psychological reasons which had barred me from performing such manipulations earlier. Until very recently I had considered Amber herself the single, immutable reality from which all shadows took their form. Now I realized she was but first among shadows, and that the place where my father stood represented the higher reality. Therefore, while the proximity made it difficult it did not make it impossible to effect changes in this place. Yet, under other circumstances I would have saved my strength until I had reached a point where it was easier to shift things about.
Now, now though, the need for haste lay upon me. I would have to exert myself, to rush, to do my father's bidding.
By the time I reached the trail leading down the southern face of Kolvir, the character of the land had already changed. I looked upon a series of gentle slopes, rather than the steep descent which normally marked the way. I was already entering the shadowlands.
The black road still lay like a dark scar to my left as I headed downward, but the Garnath through which it had been cut was in slightly better shape than that which I knew so well. Its lines were softer, from flocks of greenery which lay somewhat nearer the dead swath. It was as though my curse upon the land were slightly mitigated. Illusion of feeling, of course, for this was no longer exactly my Amber. But, I am sorry for my part in this, I addressed everything mentally, half-prayer like. I ride now to try to undo it. Forgive me, O spirit of this place. My eyes moved in the direction of the Grove of the Unicorn, but it was too far to the west, masked by too many trees, for me even to glimpse that sacred glade.
The slope grew more level as I descended, becoming a series of gentle foothills. I let Star move faster as we crossed them, bearing to the southwest, then finally the south. Lower, lower. At a great distance to my left the sea sparkled and shone. Soon the black road would come between us, for I was descending into Garnath in its direction. No matter what I did with Shadow, I would not be able to erase that ominous presence. In fact, the fastest course I could fallow would be one that paralleled it.
We came at last to the floor of the valley. The Forest of Arden towered far to my right, sweeping westward, immense and venerable. I rode on, working what changes I could to bear me even farther from my home.
While keeping the black road on hand, I stayed a good distance from it. I had to, since it was the one thing I could not change. I kept shrubs, trees and low hills between us.
I reached out then, and the texture of the land changed.
Veins of agate... Heaps of schist... A darkening of the greenery...
Clouds swimming– across the sky... The sun shimmering and dancing...
We increased our pace. The land sank lower still. Shadows lengthened, merged. The forest retreated. A rocky wall grew to my right, another to my left... A cold wind pursued me down a rough canyon. Strata streaks-red, gold, yellow and brown-flashed by. The floor of the canyon grew sandy. Dust devils spun about us. I leaned farther forward as the way began to rise once again. The walls slanted inward, grew closer together.
The way narrowed, narrowed. I could almost touch either wall...
Their tops came together. I rode through a shadowy tunnel, slowing as it darkened... Phosphorescent designs burst into being. The wind made a moaning noise. Out then!
The light from the walls was blinding, and giant crystals rose all about us. We plunged past, following an upward trail that led away from this region and through a series of mossy dells where small, perfectly circular pools lay still as green glass.
Tall ferns appeared before us and we made our way among them. I heard a distant trumpeting noise.
Turning, pacing... Red now the ferns, wider and lower... Beyond, a great plain, pinking into evening...
Forward, over pale grasses... The smell of fresh earth... Mountains or dark clouds far ahead... A rush of stars from my left... A quick spray of moisture... A blue moon leaps into the sky... Flickerings among the dark masses... Memories and a rumbling noise... Stormsmell and rushing air...
A strong wind... Clouds across the stars... A bright fork spearing a shattered tree to my right, turning it to flame... A tingling sensation... The smell of ozone... Sheets of water upon me... A row of lights to my left...
Clattering down a cobbled street... A strange vehicle approaching... Cylindrical, chugging... We avoid one another... A shout pursues me... Through a lighted window the face of a child...
Clattering... Splashing... Storefronts and homes... The rain lets up, dies down, is gone... A fog blows by, lingers, deepens, is pearled by a growing light to my left...
The terrain softens, grows red... The light within the mist brightens... A new wind, from behind, a growing warmth... The air breaks apart...
Sky of pale lemon... Orange sun rushing toward noon...
A shudder! A thing not of my doing, totally unanticipated... The ground moves beneath us, but there is more to it than that. The new sky, the new sun, the rusty desert I have just now entered-all of them expand and contract, fade and return. There comes a cracking sound, and with each fading I find Star and myself alone, amid a white nothingness-characters without a setting. We tread upon nothing. The light comes from everywhere and illuminates only ourselves. A steady cracking noise, as of the spring thaw come upon a Russian river I had once ridden beside, fills my ears. Star, who has paced many shadows, emits a frightened sound.
I look all about me. Blurred outlines appear, sharpen, grow clear. My environment is restored, though with a somewhat washed-out look to it. A bit of the pigment has been drained from the world.
We wheel to the left, racing for a low hill, mounting it, halting finally at its summit.
The black road. It too seems denatured-but even more so than the rest. It ripples beneath my gaze, almost seems to undulate as I watch. The cracking noise continues, grows louder...
A wind comes out of the north, gentle at first but increasing in force. Looking in that direction, I see a mass of dark clouds building.
I know that I must move as I have never moved before. Ultimates of destruction and creation are occurring at the place I visited-When? No matter. The waves move outward from Amber and this, too, may pass away-and me along with it. If Dad cannot put it all back together again. I shake the reins. We race southward.
A plain... Trees... Some broken buildings... Faster.. .
The smoke of a forest afire... A wall of flame... Gone...
Yellow sky, blue clouds... An armada of dirigibles crossing...
Faster.. .
The sun drops like a piece of hot iron into a bucket of water, stars become streaks... A pale light upon a straight trail... Sounds dopplered from dark smears, the wailing... Brighter the light, fainter the prospect... Gray, to my right, my left.. . Brighter now... Nothing but the trail my eyes to ride... The wailing heightens to a shriek... Forms run together... We race through a tunnel of Shadow... It begins to revolve...
Turning, turning... Only the road is real... The worlds go by...
I have released my control of the sets and ride now the thrust of the power itself, aimed only to remove me from Amber and hurl me toward Chaos... There is wind upon me and the cry in my ears... Never before have I pushed my power over Shadow to its limit... The tunnel grows as slick and seamless as glass... I feel I am riding down a vortex, a maelstrom, the heart of a tornado... Star and I are drenched with sweat... There is a wild feeling of flight upon me, as though I am pursued... The road is become an abstraction... My eyes sting as I try to blink away the perspiration... I cannot hold this ride much longer... There comes a throbbing at the base of my skull...
I draw back gently upon the reins and Star begins to slow...
The walls of my tunnel of light grow grainy... Blotches of gray, black, white, rather than a uniformity of shading... Brown... A hint of blue... Green... The wailing descends to a hum, a rumble, fading... Gentler the wind... Shapes come and go... Slowing, slowing...
There is no path. I ride on mossy earth. The sky is blue, the clouds are white. I am very light-headed. I draw rein. I—
Tiny.
I was shocked as I lowered my eyes. I stood at the outskirts of a toy village. Houses I could hold in the palm of my hand, miniscule roads, tiny vehicles crawling along them...
I looked back. We had crushed a number of these diminutive residences. I looked all around. There were fewer to the left. I guided Star carefully in that direction, kept moving until we had left that place. I felt bad about it-whatever it was-whoever dwelled there. But there was not a thing that I could do.
I moved again, passing through Shadow, until I came to what seemed a deserted quarry beneath a greenish sky. I felt heavier here. I dismounted, took a drink of water, walked around a bit.
I breathed deeply of the damp air that engulfed me. I was far from Amber now, about as far as one ever need go, and well on my way to Chaos. I had seldom come this far before. While I had chosen this place for a rest stop because it represented the nearest thing to normalcy I could catch hold of, the changes would soon be getting more and more radical.
The Great Book of Amber Page 75
