by Robin Hicks
"Shit, she's here!?" Koty sat straight up and ran her fingers through her hair. "Man, I think I need a drink."
Jamie leaned in a little closer and hugged her. "Take it easy Koty. You going to be all right? You already have half a drink in front of you." She quietly continued so only Koty could hear, "Don't get carried away on the booze Babes just take it easy."
"Shit Jamie, you're not gonna lecture me are you?"
"No, but you're my best friend, and you're hurting pretty badly right now. We are both the same when we're hurting. We tend to hit the alcohol a little too heavily when we need to escape. Right now you are seriously trying to escape."
Jamie made Koty look at her so that she knew she heard her, then stood and patted her on the back. "Just think about what I said. Ok?"
Koty picked up her glass and finished off her drink as she watched Jamie walk away. Laney leaned in and whispered to her.
"One of these days when you feel comfortable enough to talk to me Koty, I hope you can tell me what just happened here and who this Kasey woman is because it's got you as white as a sheet right now."
Laney could sense that Koty probably wanted to be alone right now so she reached over to rub her shoulder, then stood and went to talk to some woman leaning against the wall.
Chapter Forty-Seven
Kasey stepped out of the kitchen just in time to see the woman that Trish had told her was Koty's partner lean in, whisper something to her, then rub her shoulder.
Koty looked up at that time and their eyes locked. Kasey felt something shift in her stomach at the look on Koty's face before she backed herself into the kitchen again. 'This is crazy!'
Koty leaned her elbows on her knees for a few minutes. 'Fuck! We can't keep going on like this, something has gotta give somewhere.' Standing to stretch her tall lean body she then walked to the bathroom.
As she turned to go down the hallway she bumped right into Kasey.
"Um...I'm sorry." Koty just stood there fidgeting. "So how have you been Kasey?"
"I've been...fine Koty. How about you, are you doing alright?"
"Well...yeah, I've been pretty good. Look Kasey..." Then she stopped.
"Yes?"
"Um...I have to go to the bathroom."
Kasey didn't say a word. She slowly stepped aside as Koty brushed by her and closed the bathroom door.
Koty leaned her head against the closed door, and shut her eyes to the tears. All she wanted to do was grab Kasey's hand and take her home. She couldn't believe the amount of tears she had shed in this past month. 'I miss her so much it's tearing me apart.'
When Koty walked back into the living room, Mel was talking to a very somber faced Jamie who turned to look at her as she came up to them. 'Uh oh, wonder what that's all about?'
Mel turned to Koty briefly. "I was just telling Jamie about the application that you put in with the Morgan Sheriffs Department. You had put me down as a personal reference, and Sheriff Abby called me because you forgot to put a contact number. He told me with your qualifications and reputation, he would be crazy not to have you on his team. Anyway, he wants you on board, all you need to do is call him."
Koty had completely forgotten that she even put that application in. She was pretty upset that morning about Kasey, and when she had gotten home the next week, and she and Kasey had gotten together, she totally forgot about it. 'Sonofabitch, no wonder Jamie looks like she wants to kill my dog. She thinks that I wasn't going to tell her.'
"So, they're really interested huh?" Koty asked, then looked at Jamie who still had that, 'I'm gonna kill you' look on her face.
"Look guys, I've had way too much to drink. I'm gonna go find Laney and see if she is ready to go. Great party James." She hugged them goodbye then left them wondering what her plans were.
After Koty had left, Jamie and Mel were telling Trish and Kasey about Koty's offer with the Sheriffs Department. Kasey turned sharply and walked out of the kitchen with Trish hot on her heels.
Jamie slammed her glass down on the counter, nearly breaking it, and followed them into the living room. Kasey looked at her with a stricken look on her face.
"Jamie, what in the hell is she thinking? Is she going to accept it?"
Trish put her arm around Kasey's waist, waiting for Jamie's answer herself.
"I honestly don't know. Ninety percent of the time I can tell you exactly what Koty is thinking, but this time I just don't know. She didn't give any indication as to what she is going to do. Hell, I didn't even know that she applied so this is all news to me too."
Jamie reached for the drink that Mel handed her. "Thanks Mel. I will tell you this Kasey. If Koty feels that it's really over between the two of you, she probably doesn't think there's anything to hold her here. I wish I had a better answer than that for you."
Kasey wanted desperately to talk to Koty. Her mind was racing furiously. 'Why did she just leave out of here without telling me goodbye?' Can I let Koty walk out of my life that easily? Is Jamie right? Would Koty just leave now that we aren't together anymore? What will I do?'
∗ ∗ ∗ ∗
"I can't believe that Koty wouldn't tell me that she was even thinking about leaving." Jamie told Trish as they climbed into bed. "I know she's had a lot on her mind lately, but she always confides in me, why not this time?"
"I don't know Honey, but I do know that this is going to kill Kasey if she does go. I wish they would just stop this crazy argument and make up, because they are both miserable without each other."
"I've never seen Koty this down before over a woman. Kasey is the one for her. We know it, and Koty knows it, now Kasey needs to know it."
"They have both been burned in the past by ex lovers, and that makes them gun shy. I don't know what will happen Jamie, but I hope that Koty doesn't leave."
"Yeah, me too."
Trish growled at Jamie when she put her cold feet on her calve. "Remove them, or lose them." Trish sqeeked.
"Aw but Baby, I want you to warm me up."
"I know of another way to warm you up Honey, but if you don't move those ice cubes, I'm going to roll over and pretend that you're not here."
"Ok, ok. I'll move them. Hee hee, come here Baby."
∗ ∗ ∗ ∗
Sitting in a booth at Captain D's where they had stopped for lunch, Laney told Koty that she had never eaten there before, but she had always wanted to try it.
"I'm sure my ateraries just went into shock, but this is wonderful," Laney moaned after another bite.
"Koty, I know that this is probably none of my business, but you seemed really upset the other night over that Kasey woman. Um...is she your lover?"
Koty regarded her for a moment then sat her drink down. "She was. She basically told me that she didn't want to see me anymore, and to let it go. She thinks that I screwed around on her with my ex girlfriend."
"Did you?"
"No I didn't. I was up at a skiing lodge with my brother and sister-in- law when we got snowed in and they shut the roads down. We had our rooms there already, but those that didn't had to sleep on the floor. Tina was there with some of her friends from the fire station, and I felt bad about her having to sleep down in the lobby with all of those other people, so when she asked if she could stay in my room, I said yes, but she had to pull the cushions off the chairs and sleep on the floor. I went to take a shower, and right before I got out, Kasey called and Tina answered the phone. Needless to say, she freaked out and doesn't seem to want to believe me when I tell her that nothing happened."
"Mmm. Look, I also overheard your friends talking about you taking that job up in Morgan. Are you serious about taking it?"
"I was at the time that I put in the application. My head was pretty screwed up, and I was looking for an escape. I was still recovering from being shot, and trying to ignore my feelings for Kasey."
"Well for what it's worth, I hope you don't take it. I kind of like having you as my partner, so now that I think about it, I will just refuse to let you g
o."
Koty looked her in the eyes, and at that moment, Laney felt a shift in her gut. 'What in the hell is that all about?' Confused, she started laughing, and Koty joined in, unaware of what had just happened.
"Well I must say Koty, that Kasey is really beautiful, but she is also being a fool."
"Thanks."
"By the way," Laney said as she pushed her tray away from her, "I hear that the station has a softball team that's getting ready to start, and that you are one of their best players. I'm not too shabby myself and I signed up this morning."
"Great. We have a really good team, and were undefeated last year. We're supposed to start practicing this weekend. I can use it because I feel so out of shape from the winter. I really need to start using the gym at work again"
"Uh yeah, I can tell because you are soooo flabby."
"Smartass."
"Yeap. You ready to go?"
"Let's roll. Man, I ate too much."
"You say that every time."
They were both quiet as they got in the car and left the restaurant. It was finally starting to warm up a little during the days so Koty cracked her window to get some fresh air.
Chapter Forty-Eight
Kasey and Lee were having dinner at Laces after a long day at work. They had just finished eating, and were having a drink when they saw Tina walking up to their table.
"Oh great," Kasey mumbled.
"Excuse me Kasey, but can I talk to you for a minute?"
Lee told Kasey that she was going to say hi to Linda up at the bar and she'd be back shortly.
Getting an uneasy feeling in the pit of her stomach, Kasey just waved a hand at the seat for Tina to sit down.
"Look, I know I'm the last person on this earth you want to see or talk to, but I'll only take a minute of your time if you will just hear me out."
Kasey didn't say anything, and took a sip of her drink and a drag off of the cigarette that Lee had left burning in the ashtray. She silently waited for Tina to continue, and was sure that she really didn't want to hear anything that she had to say.
"Just for the record Kasey, nothing happened between Koty and me in her room that night. Not that I didn't want it to because I did, but Koty didn't. I would have done just about anything to get her back at the time. I really screwed up when I messed around on her. Koty was the best thing that had ever happened in my life, and I fucked it up. If you are going to push her away, don't do it because of me. Koty will never take me back, and I know that now."
Tina took the drink from the waitress, and paid her for it before she continued her story. 'I don't know why the hell I'm so nervous.'
"I don't even know why I am telling you this because I really hated you for a long time. With you in the picture, I knew there was no chance in hell for me to win her back. No. I'm the one that messed it up between us, so I guess you really didn't have anything to do with it. Anyway, I guess what I am trying to say is...don't let her go Kasey. Dakota Silvers is a very special woman. The kind of woman that only happens once in a lifetime. She needs someone special in her life, and unfortunately that someone isn't me. It's you, so don't throw away your chance with her. Think hard about what it is you are really mad at her about. You can't use me as an excuse because I am out of her life as far as lovers go."
Tina stood to leave then turned around and placed her hands on the table in front of Kasey. "I'll tell you one more thing. Koty is in love with you. She loves you a hell of a lot more than she ever loved me, and we were together for three years. She wasn't even close to being as devastated over me as she is with you."
"Why are you telling me all of this Tina? Did Koty send you here with these words of wisdom?" Kasey asked Tina sarcastically.
"Koty would kill me if she even knew that I was talking to you. Why am I telling you this? Well, because Koty deserves to be happy Kasey, and you are the only one that is going to be able to make her that way. Don't make the same mistake that I did and let her get away from you. You will regret it for the rest of your life."
With that, Tina turned and walked away with Kasey staring dumbfounded at her back. Lee came up to her and placed her hands on her shoulders.
"Everything ok Sweety?"
Kasey looked up at her with tears filling her eyes. "I don't know Lee, I just don't know." She told Lee what Tina had told her.
"Maybe Kase, you might want to listen, even if it did come from Tina.
∗ ∗ ∗ ∗
Koty went over to Chris and Monty's for dinner, not being able to put them off any longer. Chris had called and told her that if she didn't show up, she was going to come find her, and drag her ass over to the house.
She had never heard Chris so upset at her before, and felt really guilty for putting them off for as long as she had. 'What an asshole you've been Koty.'
When she got to the door, it opened up even before she had a chance to knock.
"Get in here, sit down, and tell me what is going on Dakota," Chris said with her hands planted firmly on her hips. "Tell me what is happening with you Koty. Tell me why you have lost so much weight, and why you don't come around to see us anymore. And while you're at it, tell me that you are not taking that job up in Morgan."
"Jesus, word gets around fast. How did you find out about that Chris?"
"Does it matter how I found out? Jesus Honey, everyone is really worried about you! You are drinking like a fish, and working yourself into the ground. How can we help you if you don't tell us what's happening?"
"Chris," Koty said softly. "I'm ok really. I've got a lot going on right now and I'm just trying to sort out my life and get it back on track. I know that I drink too much and I'm sorry if you feel like I'm pushing you guys away."
Koty hung her head and sighed. "It wasn't my intention to hurt you guys."
"So then why are you even thinking about leaving here Koty? Talk to me please."
Koty saw the hurt in Chris's eyes and felt like a heel. All they ever did was care for her and be there anytime that she needed them, and here she was treating them like strangers.
"Chris, I'm not taking that job in Morgan. I'm not leaving here."
"That's not what Kasey says or thinks."
"Kasey? How in the hell does Kasey...God, Jamie has a big fucking mouth. I didn't answer yes or no, because I wanted to get a reaction out of Jamie. You know, just pulling her chain, I didn't think she would take it to heart."
"Watch your language Koty. Look, you need to let Kasey know that you're not leaving."
"Why Chris, she won't even talk to me. She's been avoiding me like the Black Plague! She couldn't give a damn if I left this fucking place or not. Hell, she wouldn't even know that I have gone!" Koty started to get very emotional and started pacing.
"Dakota, watch your language. And you're wrong, she would most definitely notice you were gone. Look Honey, Monty made a great dinner, and I don't want to spoil it any more than I already have. He went to the store to pick up some wine."
Chris pulled Koty into a tight hug. "I'm sorry for upsetting you so much, but we were just worried."
Koty relaxed in Chris's arms. "I'm sorry too Chris. I know that you're just worried, but I really am ok."
Monty showed up with the wine, and they sat down at the table to eat.
Monty was telling them about this real big contract he got for a mini mall on the south side of Suffolk. Monty asked Koty about her new partner. Apparently, he knew of her husband. "I've never met him personally, but I have heard of him. Tommy and Bill Wade went to school with him and said that he was a real jerk."
"He is a jerk. I haven't met him either, but from what Laney has told me I'm glad I haven't had the pleasure. Laney is really cool. She's very smart, and is one hell of a detective, even better than I am. She's quick to figure things out. I never thought that I would want to work beside anyone else since Mike quit, but she's not bad."
Chris arched her eyebrows and looked at Koty.
"No way Chris, it's not what you are think
ing. I'm not interested in her that way, but we are becoming fast friends and I need that right now. She'll put me in my place in a heartbeat though. She's got a lot of spunk and motivation. I think you'll both like her a lot."
Before Koty left that night she promised Chris that she would bring Laney over for dinner one night. She knew that Chris was just curious, but that was ok. Once Chris met her, she would see what Koty meant, and would instantly like her as well.
∗ ∗ ∗ ∗
Koty lay awake that night thinking about Kasey. In such a short amount of time, Kasey had become a monumental part in her life. She never knew that love could feel so good, and hurt so bad at the same time.
She refused to believe that it was over. Somehow she had to find a way to get Kasey back into her life. Somehow she would have her back into her arms again where she belonged.
If everyone else could be happy and with the one that they loved, then why the hell couldn't she? 'I have never really needed much, but I do need her. God I miss her so much.'
Like a video, scenes of them together played over and over in her head. She kept remembering the first night that they were together and made love. Koty had thought she had died and gone to heaven.
One way or another, she would have that heaven again.
Chapter Forty-Nine
"Kasey," Chris said as they were locking up the clinic, "Koty is playing on the squads softball team again this year, and they are having a game this Saturday. Do you want to come with me to watch them? She's really good."
Kasey hesitated for a moment before answering. "Actually Chris, I just might do that, what time is the game? Since the weather has warmed up some I've been dying to get out in the sun."
Saturday afternoon, Chris picked Kasey up from her house, and they drove to the softball field in Chris's Durango. When they arrived at Princess Anne Park, Chris pulled two Coleman folding chairs, and a small cooler out of the back of her S.U.V.. "You can't go to a softball game and not have beer. That would be like going to the movies and not having popcorn. They both just go together."
