by Lisa Kessler
“It’s late, but I need some food.” He handed me a room key. “Probably a substantial amount of food.”
I chuckled in spite of my mood. Jason had a knack for sensing when I needed to get out of my own head or something. Supposedly I was the psychic, but maybe there was more to the mate thing than I realized.
“Is this big appetite a werewolf thing?”
He nodded, leaving our things at the bell desk. “Yeah, our metabolism runs fast, so we need food and plenty of it. The perk is, we never gain a spare tire around our middles.”
“I bet Weight Watchers hates you guys.”
“Now you understand why secrecy is so important for us.”
I laughed and slid my arm around his waist. “What are you in the mood for?”
He glanced down at me with hunger in his eyes, a decidedly sexy hunger that had nothing to do with food. My body warmed. I wet my lips and he tightened his hold around my waist, his voice low, almost a growl.
“Maybe we should go to the room first.”
There was a delicious power in witnessing the effect I had on him, in seeing his desire. He didn’t hide it from me. That honesty turned me on even more than his chiseled body.
“While that’s tempting…” I took his hand. “I’d like to see the water.”
He nodded and kissed my forehead. “Sounds good to me.”
We made our way through the lobby area and outside. The Sheraton was right on the water, and with the bright, nearly full moon, the froth on the waves glowed in the silvery light. My breath caught in my throat as the waves crashed onto the sand.
Home.
I tugged Jason out to the beach. We pulled off our shoes and rolled up our pant legs while the local band playing poolside belted out “Louie Louie.”
“I have shorts in my bag.” Jason laced his fingers with mine. “I should’ve changed.”
I chuckled. “If we’d gone to the room, we would’ve stayed there.”
“Definitely.” He grinned and my blood warmed.
We walked down to the water. The cool water rushed around our ankles and a giggle bubbled up from my throat. “Oh, it’s colder than I remember.”
“You probably splashed around during the day.”
I nodded. “I used to collect sand dollars with my mom. She’d tell me stories about how mermaids used them for money.”
“This must have been a great place to grow up.”
“Yeah. For a while it was…” The moonlight sparkled on the water, and for the first time, I realized thinking about my mom hadn’t made me angry.
Another wave came in hard, splashing up our pant legs. Jason jumped back, laughing. “Shit. That one surprised me.”
Behind us, the band broke into a cover of “Hungry Like the Wolf.” I smiled up at mine. He was sexy even in soaking-wet blue jeans. “Dance with me.”
He chuckled, glancing down the beach. “I’m not much of a dancer.”
“You can’t listen to this song and not move to the beat.” I let my hips sway to the pulsing drumbeat as I took his hand. “There’s no one out here to see. Just feel it.”
He rolled his eyes but gradually started to move with me. The waves crashed and raced toward us, but I barely noticed. I couldn’t take my eyes off of Jason. Once he got over being self-conscious, he could move. I danced around him slowly, enjoying the hunger in his gaze.
As the band finished and started a new song, Jason pulled me close, my breasts pressed tight to his chest. “This wolf is very hungry.”
I ran my hands up his chest. “Dancing can tell you a lot about a person.”
He raised a brow. “I’m afraid of what I just told you.”
I laughed as another wave drenched us. “You like to be in control, but the second you allowed your body to respond to the beat, your instincts took over and you danced. You surrendered.” Kissing his chest, I whispered, “You have an artist’s passion trapped inside your analytical mind.”
Jason lifted me up, and I wrapped my legs around his waist. His forehead rested against mine. “I’ve never liked dancing.” He started to sway with the music and the tide, turning us slowly. “But maybe I just never had the right partner.”
His lips claimed mine as the waves broke around us. My pulse raced, my body warmed, and gradually he broke the kiss. “You make me feel invincible.”
But he wasn’t invincible. None of us were, and my vision of him bleeding from a gunshot wound was never far from my consciousness.
“Tell me what it’s like out here through your eyes and ears, with your wolf senses.”
He slowly lowered me to the ground and took my hand. Together we walked down the shoreline. “We’re walking into the wind, so not only can I smell all the food, but if I concentrate, I can tell you one of the band members forgot deodorant. The waves make it tough to hear conversations.”
“And how do you know they’re not out here watching us right now?”
“After my fight with Damian, I’d recognize his scent in a heartbeat. He’s not on this beach. I didn’t pick up his scent in the airport, either, but with all the people coming and going, his scent was probably gone by the time we got there.”
“So he couldn’t sneak up on you?”
Jason shrugged. “It’d be tough. Maybe if he was downwind he could take a shot?” He looked down at me. “Can I ask you a question now?”
“Sure.”
“Is this about your vision? Because I don’t see it as set in stone. We’re being cautious, and we can change the outcome.”
I sighed and swallowed the lump in my throat. “I made a pact with myself to never get involved with another doctor, but that night at Adam’s ranch, when I found out your first-aid kit was Bactine and Band-Aids and your first love was art, not science…” I shook my head and stared out at the waves. “You’re a good guy, Jason, and all I bring to the table is danger.”
He came around in front of me and lifted my chin to meet his eyes. “Here’s what you bring to the table. You’re smart and strong. I’ve never seen anyone so calm under pressure. The day my dad was attacked, he would’ve died without your help, and when Damian met us in the parking lot, you were cool enough to call my brother for backup. You probably saved us both.” He started to smile. “And you saved me from cracking my head open in my shower even though I’m a terrible patient.”
I laughed, remembering the way he groaned about the Bactine stinging. “You really are a bad patient.”
“And tonight you got me to dance.” He pointed to his chest. “Me. The non-dancer. And you know what?” I shook my head. “I sort of liked it.”
I grinned. “So when this is over, you might take me dancing?”
He kissed my lips. “Definitely.” He pulled back, smile fading. “I need to tell you something.”
My pulse jumped a little. “Okay.”
“If things go bad here, I need you to know that…” His voice was raw with emotion. “Somewhere in this crazy mess, I fell for you. And if that vision you had comes true, I want—”
“I want you to bite me and make me like you.”
His eyes widened at my interruption. “What?”
“It’s the only way I can help you and not be a hindrance. I see that now.”
He frowned. “You don’t have to do that. Not yet.” He took my hand. “Being changed by your mate is a commitment. Lifelong commitment. I’d be lying through my teeth if I told you I didn’t want that with all my being, but before you interrupted I was trying to say…I love you. And I’m willing to wait twenty years if that’s what it takes for you to see that those aren’t empty words like you’ve heard in the past. When you need me, I’ll be there. You don’t need to change a thing.”
A tear spilled down my cheek as I rose up on my toes to kiss him. His strong arms held me tight as our lips parted. My tongue tangled slowly with his while my mind reeled, replaying his words over and over. This wasn’t an “I love you” gasped after sex, or a manipulation. He hadn’t asked for anything in retur
n.
What could I give? All I brought to the table was trouble and danger. Unless he changed me. If I had the senses he did, combined with my visions, I could save him. Was I ready for a lifelong commitment? Was he? Some small part of myself, the little lost girl, reminded me that my own mother walked out on me and never came back. What if Jason discovered the flaw inside me that sent her away?
My chest tightened as I pulled back, aching to escape the doubt and fear roiling inside me. “You’re probably starving.”
He growled against my lips. “Not for food.”
I caught his lower lip with my teeth, whispering into the kiss, “We could order room service.”
“Probably safer to stay inside.” He hummed against my lips.
Oh, he was preaching to the choir.
We both grinned. Jason grabbed my hand and hustled back to the hotel.
I woke in a cold sweat. Jason still slept peacefully beside me. I sat up, rubbing my ankle over my honu tattoo. The sea turtle came to me in my dream. Through his eyes, I saw my grandmother. Her face was in shadows, a bonfire blazing behind her as she danced. Her hands told me a story. A warning.
The men in gray were back. They were on Maui asking about her. She left her home, the one I shared with her so long ago. The turtle turned, offering me a view of the rainforest and the waterfall. The cabin. Grandma Nani was staying in her spiritual getaway. When I was little, I’d go with her, watching her work. The skills of a true Kahuna were passed down to family. No outsiders.
But I left home before she could teach me. Had she taken in another apprentice in my place?
My honu let me see my grandmother one last time. Her dance had changed, slowed. Fire flickered in her dark eyes, her skin gleaming with sweat. I struggled to concentrate, to hold onto the dream. Using her body, she wove an urgent message.
Stay away.
I pulled my knees into my chest. Could she have any idea that we were already on the islands? My grandmother didn’t have visions like I did. She gained information from the winds, the waves, the animals and rocks. Our ancestors lived in these islands, and a Kahuna could sense their presence, receive their messages.
Jason stirred beside me. “Something wrong?”
“My grandmother contacted me in my dream. She wants us to stay away.”
He sat up, running his hand slowly up and down my spine. “She’s trying to protect you.”
“Or I’m not welcome here.”
“No way.” He kissed my shoulder. “I don’t believe that for a second.”
“I wish I shared your conviction.” I grabbed a rubber band from the nightstand and put my hair up. “The Nero team is on Maui. She isn’t at her house.”
“She told you where she was?” He glanced at the turtle on my ankle. “How does this honu thing work exactly?”
“Nothing exact about it.” I shrugged. “He guards my family line, and when we summon him, sometimes he can connect with our bloodline across the miles through dreams and meditations. That’s how I warned her that they were looking for me a few weeks ago.”
“And she got the message?”
“As far as I know. It’s not like sending an email. The meaning isn’t always clear in dreams, and other times it never comes through at all.”
“Gareth has something like that.”
“Really?”
Jason nodded, peering over at the clock. “His mom was part of the Paiute tribe, and while Nadya was fighting for her life, he found out he was a dream walker.”
“Wow. So he doesn’t need a go-between?”
He shrugged. “I’m not clear on how it works, but according to Nadya, he entered her dreams and helped her. He could connect with her wolf, hold her spirit on this side.”
“Our honu delivers warnings and messages. I’m not sure he could physically help us.”
“Getting the message that they’re already on Maui and the location of your grandmother is help enough.” He got out of bed, naked, still bruised but strong. “We should get out of here. The sooner we find her, the sooner we can get back to the Pack.”
“Harvest moon is tomorrow night.”
He nodded and pulled on a pair of underwear. “Yeah.”
“Her cabin is tough to get to. There’s no way we’ll get her and get back to Reno in time.”
“I figured.” He picked up his shirt. “Sounds remote enough that I should be able to shift up there without being seen, right?”
I used to play in the forest while my grandmother held her spiritual retreats. There were places where the vegetation was impenetrable and you couldn’t see farther than a few feet ahead, let alone blaze a trail. What if he wandered off as a wolf and couldn’t find his way back?
“There aren’t many people up there, but it’s not like the woods in Lake Tahoe. The forest on Maui is thick. Hikers get lost all the time.”
He came and sat next to me on the bed. His gaze drifted over my face. “You’re my mate. My other half. Whether you’re ready to believe it or not, it doesn’t change that it’s true. My wolf can track you anywhere. If you stay at your grandmother’s cabin, I’ll find my way back, no matter what.” He ran his fingers along the edge of my jaw. “You’re my north star, Kilani. Being near you makes my heart, my soul, and my wolf whole for the first time in my life.”
My mouth went dry. I cleared my throat, struggling to dislodge the lump of emotion choking me. I leaned in and brushed my lips to his, wishing for the millionth time that we could just hide away. I opened my eyes, losing myself in the intensity of his stare.
“I can’t figure out how to open my heart. I want to, but I’m so terrified that if I did and then I lost you, I’d never recover. It’d probably be easier if you weren’t everything I ever dreamed about. You’re smart, sexy, and a little rough around the edges…”
The corner of his mouth pulled up into a crooked, boyish grin that melted the heart I was so desperate to protect. “You don’t have a monopoly on fear. Until we kick Nero’s asses out of Reno—and trust me, I have every intention of doing that—you’re a target. If anything happened to you…” He shook his head, breaking eye contact. “Can’t even think about it.”
I covered his tight fist and kissed his cheek. “If you make me a wolf like you, I’d be stronger and more help in the ass-kicking department.”
Jason got up from the bed and stalked over to pick up the duffel bag. “You still don’t seem to get it. There’s no turning back. I won’t trap you into loving me. Right now, you still have a choice. You can still walk away. I hate the shit out of the thought, but I care about you, and I’d never want you with me, wondering if it was all a mistake.”
We packed up the room in silence. I chewed on his words. He made it clear, he wanted to change me, to make me his, but this wasn’t a traditional relationship. This was mate for life. Two halves of one soul. The romantic dream I’d carried around most of my life.
But my mother and two different men snubbed out that flame, crushing it into ashes, and I didn’t know how to believe again.
We caught a cab to the airport to grab the flight over to Maui. Jason held my hand, but he kept to himself. Normally silences made me nervous, worried someone was disappointed or angry with me, but with Jason, I could think. He was giving me space.
Giving me a chance to decide what I really wanted. It shouldn’t be that difficult, but this wasn’t deciding between a banana and a pineapple. The only thing that was certain was my desire to keep my vision from coming true. Jason would not end up shot, lying in a pool of his own blood. Not while I was still alive.
Was that love? Maybe.
I had today to figure it out. Tomorrow night was the full moon.
Chapter Twenty-One
JASON
While Kilani sat at the gate, I gave Adam a call. He answered on the first ring. “Everything all right?”
“For now. We’re waiting for our flight over to Maui.” I lowered my voice. “I figured something out last night and it involves your family.”
His tone sobered. “I’m listening.”
I took a deep breath. “Sebastian’s motives for stopping his brother have been bothering me.”
“Yeah, me, too.”
I nodded even though he’d never see me. “I think Damian is hoping to win favor with their father, maybe bump Sebastian out of line to inherit the company.”
“You could be on to something.”
I clenched my fist. Adam wasn’t going to be as calm about the next part. I cleared my throat. “This affects us because ever since Damian came at me with a knife, something about him seemed familiar, and yesterday when Sebastian got pissy about Damian’s age, it confirmed the last piece of this puzzle.”
“You lost me.”
“When Lana smiled last night, I realized why Damian looked so familiar.” I paused, but he didn’t reply. “Adam, I think Damian is Lana’s fraternal twin.”
“Holy shit.” Adam groaned under his breath.
“Yeah.” I glanced over at Kilani. “I think that’s why Sebastian never took Lana to his father. He brought me a flash drive with the breeding experiment data but no mention of the father’s identity. Because he realized he’s Lana’s older brother and that makes Severino—”
“Fuck,” Adam interrupted, his breath puffing into the phone. “You’re telling me that my kids have Nero blood.”
“Yeah.”
“Their grandfather is the lunatic who ordered the hit on your mate.”
“And I’m guessing Sebastian hasn’t told him or they’d have a much bigger force beating on our back door.”
“Damian must not know…”
“I have no idea, but you and your family need to have backup at all times until we can nail Sebastian down on this.”
“And you need to grab Kilani’s grandmother and get your ass home. We need to circle the wagons. Splitting up the Pack leaves us vulnerable.”
“I know. We’ll be back soon.”
“Thanks for the information. Not what I wanted to hear, but I’ll protect them.”
