“Don’t you all have women and children waiting for you?” she yelled. “Return home to your lodges. This celebration must end now.”
A few of the men stared open-mouthed at her, swaying on their feet. Two of the dancers had stopped. The other one continued his wild body movements. Sarah stepped closer. Chase and the other warrior stared at her.
“I said, it’s time to go home,” she repeated herself. She raised her rifle slightly for emphasis. The men started to laugh. Suddenly, without warning, someone grabbed her from behind around the waist. Sarah gasped. She hadn’t noticed anyone moving behind her. The stench of alcohol wafted to her nose. Her assailant spun her around, and she faced a leering Crow warrior, his red face paint contorting his features in an evil-looking twist.
She struggled for release, but the man only held on to her with greater force. An instant later, his arms were torn away from her. Her head spun around. Chase was there, towering over her assailant. He had a hold of the front of the man’s shirt with both fists, and almost lifted him off the ground.
“If you touch her again, I’ll kill you,” Chase growled in a menacing tone. He threw the warrior away from him. The drunk Indian fell to the ground. Silence ensued, the only sound coming from the crackling of the fire. Sarah spun around and ran to the safety of the cabin, her heart beating wildly in her chest. Her breaths came in short quick gasps. She slammed the door shut, darting to the back of the room. Leaning over the workbench, she braced her hands against the counter for support. Tears ran down her face.
How long she stood there, she didn’t know. The touch of a warm hand on her shoulder startled her. She’d forgotten to bolt the door!
“Sarah.” Chase’s voice was close to her ear, sending shivers of apprehension down her spine.
“Please leave,” she whispered, trying to control her erratic breathing.
“They left. I sent them away.”
“You should have gone with them,” she said, her tone bitter.
“I didn’t drink, Sarah.” Both his hands were on her shoulder now. He slid them slowly down her arms, and applied pressure to turn her around.
She looked up at him through blurry eyes, trying to make out his features in the darkness. “You could have fooled me,” she spat.
“I didn’t touch a drop, I swear, angel.” The hands caressing her arms sent renewed shivers through her body.
“Can you smell any alcohol on my breath?” He leaned in closer. Sarah forgot to breathe. She tried to back up, but her backside bumped into the workbench. Chase slid his hands to her shoulders, then up her neck, his thumbs caressing her cheeks, swiping away her tears. Her knees went weak at his touch.
“Sarah…” he whispered, then covered her mouth with his. Lightning currents swept through her system. The slow movement of his lips against hers melted her resolve. Her arms reached up of their own will, sliding around his waist and up his back, until she gripped his shoulders. His kiss grew more demanding, and he pressed his body to hers with a throaty moan.
Sarah’s head spun in a dizzying spiral. It felt so natural, so right, and so good to be in this man’s arms. His hands seemed to be everywhere. She hadn’t even realized his arm had gone around her waist, until he pulled her tightly to him. He abandoned her mouth to trail kisses down her face. He nuzzled her neck, rooting with his face in her hair. Sarah gasped. She shuddered at the delicious chills that shot up and down her spine.
His hands trembled as they traveled up along her waist and arms, cupping her face again. He leaned into her, pressing her back against the workbench. Her own hands had somehow moved up along his chest, and his heart drummed strong and fast against her right hand. His mouth claimed hers again, and his hands slid down her front. She gasped a second time and stiffened when he covered her breasts, his palms hot to the touch through the fabric of her shirt.
His hands continued their exploration of her body, traveling down along her ribcage and settled at her waist, and he pulled his head back. In the darkness of the cabin, Sarah couldn’t see his face, but his breathing was as shallow and sporadic as her own.
“Now do you believe me? I only drank water,” he whispered.
Sarah couldn’t speak. She only nodded, not sure if he could even see her.
“I’m sorry I broke my promise,” he cleared his throat.
“Promise?” she managed to utter.
“That I wouldn’t kiss you again,” Chase reminded her. “You’re the one who kissed me when I was tied up, remember?”
Sarah sniffed, and laughed nervously.
“It’s a lot better when I can put my arms around you,” he said, his voice deeper than usual, and pulled her close to him. Her hands were still pressed to his chest, and she sighed at the multitude of feelings that assaulted her. She wished she could hold on to this moment forever. “Angel? Say something. I can’t see your face.”
“Please….will you……would you kiss me again, Chase?” Had she actually spoken the words or only thought them? Chase hadn’t moved. She shifted her weight from foot to foot, suddenly embarrassed by her bold request. She pushed against him, intending to scurry out of his embrace before she humiliated herself any more.
His hold around her waist tightened. “How would you like me to kiss you, angel? Like this?” He brushed his lips across hers lightly. “Or like this?” His mouth crushed down on hers, one hand behind her head, holding her to him, his other arm pulling her tightly against his lower half. Sarah moaned. Adrenaline rushed through her, and she thought she would melt. The world spiraled out of control. Her arms crept up around his neck, her hands entwining behind his head. Her own mouth parted, and she moved her lips in response to his assault.
Chase raked his fingers through her hair, then his hand caressed her cheek. The next moment, it slid down along her ribcage, and back up again. Abruptly, he broke away.
“If we don’t stop now, angel,” he panted, “I’m going to do something you’ll regret in the morning.” His hands lifted away from her. She tightened her hold around his neck, leaning into him, and put her head against his chest. He drew in a deep breath, and his arms wrapped around her waist again.
“Sarah, you have no idea what you’re doing to me,” he whispered. Sarah listened to his rapid heartbeat, relishing the feel of his solid strength.
“Will you please just hold me?” she asked into his shirt. Her face flamed, both from the rush of feelings flooding her, and from embarrassment at her boldness. His chest expanded in a long sigh. He stepped away from the workbench, pulling her along with him. He stroked her back, lightly kissed the top of her head, and caressed her cheek with his warm hand.
“Anything you want, angel.”
She raised her head from his chest, looking up in the direction of his face. “I’m ashamed of my behavior,” she said slowly. His hand tightened at her waist. “I have no right to ask you these things, and I’m sorry. I know about the woman you’re in love with.”
Chase stiffened. He released her waist and drew away from her. Sarah’s eyes burned, and her heart rate accelerated. Here it comes, Sarah.
He chuckled.
“I need to light the lantern, angel. I need to see you.” He released her completely and moved away. Sarah heard him shuffling around in the darkness, until the soft glow of the lantern on the table illuminated the center of the room. He turned and met her eyes.
“Come here, angel.” He held out his hand to her. She took a hesitant step forward, then another. He took hold of her hand and pulled her to him.
“What do you know about the woman I’m in love with?” he asked, staring intently down at her, stroking the palm of her hand with his thumb.
“You were talking in your sleep when you were feverish.”
“And what did I say?”
“You kept saying you were sorry for the drinking, and begged her not to leave you, and that you loved her.” Sarah couldn’t help the tears from flowing. The words were painful enough to say.
“Did I mention a name
?” Why was he smiling at her like that? Couldn’t he see this was tearing her apart?
“No.” She shook her head, lowering her gaze to the ground.
“Look at me, Sarah,” he commanded softly. She didn’t comply. “Look at me,” he repeated. Slowly, she forced her head up.
“Sarah, the woman I’m in love with,” he paused and his left hand came up to caress her cheek, “is you.”
Chapter 24
Sarah stared at him in stunned silence. Her heart pounded in her ears.
“Angel?” Chase’s hands cupped her face, tilting her head up. His image became a blur as her eyes filled with new tears. “Sarah, I love you.” She heard the words again. “Can you please say something?” He laughed nervously. “I’ve never said those words to anyone before.” He ran a trembling hand through his hair.
“You…you love me?” She barely managed to produce the sounds. She wanted to hear it again, to make sure she hadn’t misunderstood. Chase loved her. Her mind reeled. She dared not believe it was actually true.
“Come here, you silly woman. Yes, I love you.” His smile lit up his face, and he pulled her into a tight embrace.
Sarah’s arms wrapped around his back, and she sobbed into his chest. “I love you, too, Chase.” His hold tightened until she could barely breathe. His arms trembled. The sensation of weightlessness, of floating through the air swept over her. Chase pulled back abruptly.
“Why are you crying, angel?” His hand swept loose stands of hair from her face. She saw his expression grow serious. “It’s Hawk, isn’t it? You have to marry him, don’t you?”
Sarah shook her head. “No, I told him that I needed more time to think.”
Chase stepped away and rested his backside against the table. He pulled her to stand in front of him, his fingers entwined with hers. “What about your father? Does he decide whether you marry Hawk or not?”
“I believe he will let me have my say,” Sarah answered. “If another man asks for me, he may have to make a decision, but I’m certain he will let me choose. I won’t know until I speak to him. I still don’t understand why he didn’t tell me before rendezvous that Hawk Soaring came to him. ” She looked hopefully into his eyes. She saw his jaw tighten, and his hands loosened around hers. Her heart sank to her stomach. Chase had no intention of asking for her.
“You still want to go home. You still believe you come from the future, don’t you?” She stepped away from him.
He reached for her hand again, holding her fingers lightly. “I do come from the future, Sarah,” he said solemnly. “This world here, it’s not what I’m used to.”
“But you can learn, can’t you? You have proven yourself over and over again since you came here.” Sarah cringed at the sound of her pleading voice. He’d just told her he loved her, yet he wanted to leave. She looked up at him suddenly. “Take me with you when you find your way home.”
Chase let out a short laugh. “You don’t belong in my world any more than I belong in yours, angel.”
“At least I would be willing to learn, Chase Russell.” Anger welled up inside her, concealing her anguish. “You say you love me, but you don’t want to be with me.” She pulled away from him and spun around. Taking a deep breath, she squeezed her eyes together. Perhaps it would have been easier on her heart if he’d never told her of his feelings for her.
“I’m still trying to figure out what it is I want, angel.” His warm breath against her neck sent chills down her spine. His hands slid around her waist from behind, and he pulled her up against him. She felt his chin rest on top of her head. “Let’s just go one day at a time, okay?”
******
His eyes followed her as she climbed the ladder up to the loft. Chase still couldn’t believe how easy it had been to say those words to her. He couldn’t even describe the feeling that came over him when she told him she loved him, too. He had no right to ask her about Hawk. The guy was in love with her, and no doubt he would make a good husband. Chase wanted to see her well taken care of. Leaving would be much easier, knowing she’d be protected.
After everything he’d experienced so far, he knew that this wilderness was a harsh place to carve out a living. A woman could not survive here without a man. Sarah was highly capable at finding food and shelter, and all the basics needed to live in the woods so far away from civilization. But she was still a woman in a man’s world, and she had no defenses against a stronger, determined man. It was a husband’s job to protect his wife and family.
He was not that kind of man. How could he possibly offer her his protection, if he couldn’t protect himself? Why couldn’t she understand that? He ran a frustrated hand through his hair. Why did everything have to be so complicated? For the first time in his life, he found someone he truly cared about. Sarah brought out the best in him. How could he let her go? But he couldn’t take her home with him. That was out of the question.
Russell, how do you know you can even get home? Maybe Aimee Osborne had faced the same dilemma, and was stuck here for good, and married a man who offered protection. That thought had occurred to him more than once. But it was different for her. She married a woodsman, one who already knew how to survive here. Chase could not offer that to Sarah.
With a heavy sigh, he turned down the lantern, and shuffled to the bedroom.
He pulled his shirt off over his head and sank down onto the mattress. Sarah had insisted he remain in her room, even though he’d told her days ago that his injuries were all healed and he experienced no more pain when walking. He could easily climb up that ladder and sleep in one of her brothers’ beds. That way she could have her room again.
He lay on his back, his hands behind his head, staring at the dark ceiling.
“One day at a time, Chase,” she’d agreed before he sent her off to bed. Turning her around in his arms, he’d kissed her again, struggling to maintain control. He couldn’t get enough of holding her, of feeling her cling to him. He grinned and shook his head. He’d never stopped at just a kiss before. Kissing a woman had always ended with both of them in the bedroom.
He wanted Sarah that way, too. God, how he wanted her. She was like butter in his arms. It would have been easy to just sweep her up and carry her to her bed, and make love to her. But he had more respect for her than that, and he knew she’d regret her actions the next day.
“When did you turn into such a noble soul, Russell,” he wondered aloud. He knew the answer to that. The day a dark-haired blue-eyed angel stood over him when he was frozen half to death, and claimed his heart.
******
He woke to the delicious smells of fresh baked bread, and the sizzling sound of meat cooking in the skillet. With a groan, he forced himself out of bed. He’d lain awake through the long hours of the night, thinking about Sarah and his ultimate dilemma. He must have dozed off some time before dawn. His head felt like it would split open any second.
Chase stretched, and rubbed the back of his neck. The door to the room creaked open slowly. He smiled when Sarah’s head poked through the crack.
“I’m decent, angel. Come on in.”
Sarah’s bright smile when she stepped into the room caused his heart to skip a beat. His gut tightened. Her hair spilled loose around her face, falling down her shoulders in wavy cascades.
“I have coffee waiting for you,” she said tentatively. “Breakfast is almost ready.”
He stepped up to her, and wrapped his arms around her waist. Why did this feel so natural, so right? Her big blue eyes gazed up at him, and her hands rested against his bare chest. He groaned at the ripples of pleasure her touch created. He raked his hands through her hair, tucking long strands behind her ears. His head bent and he kissed her neck where her pulse throbbed strong. She inhaled sharply, and shuddered. Her hands wrapped around his neck.
“Good morning, angel,” he whispered and pulled back.
“Good morning.” Her soft voice resonated through his system, dousing him in hot liquid.
Chase relea
sed her. He didn’t know how long he’d be able to maintain his self-control before his resolve at nobility crumbled. “I could sure go for some coffee,” he said, and led her out into the main room. That bed was much too close and tempting.
He rubbed at his temples, hoping some caffeine would take care of the pounding in his head. Sarah brought him a steaming cup, and motioned for him to sit at the table.
“You are in pain?”
He smiled at the concerned look on her face. “Just a headache. I didn’t sleep well.”
“I could make you some willow bark tea,” she offered.
“I think coffee will take care of it. I might just lay back down for a while, unless there’s something you need me to do today.”
Sarah set a plate of fried meat and bread in front of him. “I was going to dig for camas roots today. You should take the time and rest. You’ve done way too much work as it is. Your body is still recovering.”
“I think my body’s just fine, Sarah,” he said huskily. He chuckled when her face turned crimson. She’d obviously understood his implied double meaning. She smiled, and turned away from him, finding something to do at the workbench while he ate. He hadn’t teased or antagonized her since his ordeal with the Blackfoot, since he realized he was in love with her. A little teasing right now seemed appropriate. She didn’t appear to be too flustered over his remark.
Chase stood after finishing his meal, and swallowed the last of his coffee. He carried his dishes to the workbench.
“That table looks mighty clean,” he said, inspecting the smooth wooded surface that Sarah was busily scrubbing with a rag. He stopped her motion with his hand, and tugged on her arm, turning her to face him.
Their eyes met.
“I will be gone a few hours,” Sarah said, her voice unsteady. “You get your rest. I will wake you when I return.”
“Not before I do this,” he murmured, and stepped up close to her, bending his head towards her. He claimed her mouth, and his hands settled at her waist. Her response was immediate. She wrapped her arms around his neck and leaned into him. Chase kissed her long and slow. His insides were on fire. He’d never get tired of holding her.
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