Tyler has some shit in his life to work out. He can sometimes look like a brooding angel, while at other times he’ll be rude to everyone. Not to the women who belong to the Shadow Wolves MC though.
“We’re gonna have supper now,” I say to Star.
She nods at me as her hand tangles with mine. Tyler tosses her hair and kisses the top of her head.
“Welcome to our family,” Tyler says. “You’ll love this circus.”
Normally I’d smash a guy’s face if they dared touch my Star, but that’s how Tyler is. He likes women, because they are women, but he’d never lay his hands on Star. The Shadow Wolves don’t do such things to one another. I’m one of them now so Star has their protection like she’s their little sister.
Tyler hugs us both, and Star erupts into laughter as she is pressed against me. Yep, Tyler can be very friendly in his unique way. Nothing wrong with that and he’s my best friend apart from Takis and Gunner Junior because of how he is.
We spread among our bikes as Athena and Brianna tear Star away from me and take her to the car. We go to Brianna’s apartment. As far as I know, Zane built it for Brianna when they were younger—their perfect little nest. Brianna is very attached to it so they live in it, not in Chaviva.
As I enter the apartment, the smell of food hits my nostrils and makes my mouth water. Zane emerges from the kitchen, a ladle in his one hand and a tea towel in the other.
“Supper is almost ready,” Zane says. “How… how…” He blinks a few times as his jaw muscles twitch.
“Everything’s going to be alright,” Brianna says. “The kids are going to stay in Chaviva for half a year so we can watch over them.” She winks at me, and my jaw drops.
We sit in the dining room around the table.
“Any good news from Jax?” Brianna asks.
Athena winces. “No.”
“He’ll find Tete,” Brianna says. “Don’t worry.”
“She doesn’t want to be found,” Athena says. “She wants to be far from us and far from everything that reminds her of the Shadow Wolves.”
“It’s always a tough choice to make,” Brianna says. “I once struggled to choose.”
“So did I,” Athena says, “but for Tete there’s only one choice. There has always been only one choice for her. It was different for me. Here, I can be a doctor for someone. My whole knowledge would have died otherwise.”
“What happened?” It just pours out of me.
“Too much stress happened,” Athena said. “I killed a patient because I didn’t deliver the correct dose of her anaesthetic. She was only twenty.”
“People make mistakes and other people die,” I say. “I know something about it.”
My dad, Thunder, died because I was not careful enough.
Star nods at me several times like I’ve done something noble.
Athena flashes me a warm smile, and I feel like we’ve been friends since forever. Her eyes wander off, and she seems to sink into her private nightmares.
Brianna and Zane start delivering the food to the table.
We focus on eating. I see that Star is kind of uncomfortable. Too many people are around her, I guess.
I lean towards her. “You okay?”
She nods, but says nothing. Her eyes are glassy like she’s bathing in her own scary thoughts. She will sometimes be like this—unavailable, lost some place nobody can reach her. It scares me and worries me. I stroke the back of her hand, and she shudders.
Athena rises to her feet and moves closer to us. “You need rest, sweetie.”
Star shakes her head.
“A walk?” Athena asks. “Let’s go for a walk. A fifteen minute walk will do you good.”
Star nods. “Okay.”
“Let’s go then,” Athena says and waves her hand to Star.
They leave the room, and I feel like my heart is dying. Even one second without her by my side is like agony.
“Buy a house in the mountains,” Takis says. “The air and the wildness would do her good.”
“That’s not a bad idea actually,” I say.
“Why buy a house?” Tyler says. “Buy some land and we’ll build a house for you and Star.” He juts his chin out towards Zane. “We could do that, Dad.”
“Ask your president,” Zane says, “and if he agrees I’ll send Hawk and Gunner Senior with you.”
Tyler takes his phone out. I can hear him talking to my dad. Ten minutes later, he disconnects.
“How much money do you need, Rebel?” Tyler asks. “I can give you ten grand.”
“Ten grand?” I explode. “Why—“
“Fifteen?” Tyler says. “Alright. Fifteen.”
“I’ll give you ten more,” Takis says.
“We’ll give you fifty grand,” Zane says.
I’m speechless. My throat feels like a piece of rope is strangling it. Something good and unexpected is happening.
“I have some savings in my bank account,” I rasp, but nobody pays attention.
Brianna puts a laptop on the table and starts typing. “I’m going to find something in a nice quiet area.”
Takis and Tyler surround her and they start talking like some fucking sellers in a market.
“Here,” Brianna says. “End of discussion.”
“You’re always right, Mom,” Tyler says and exchanges glances with Zane.
“Why are you doing this?” I rasp at last.
“You’re family,” Takis says and looks at me as though I’m a lunatic.
They start talking, arguing even—Brianna changes her mind and chooses another place then she calls Sive so her sister-in-law will do all the paperwork. From the scraps of the conversation, I learn that Axel is going to give me fifty grand and Gunner Senior calls five minutes later to give me fifty more.
They talk, shout and plan everything, while I’m sitting, mute, overwhelmed by emotions. Stiff like some fucking mop.
“Let’s go to the Jilly Jet,” Tyler finally rumbles.
Takis howls like a real wolf, and Brianna raises her finger in a warning gesture.
Star
Athena and I pass a chapel with a graveyard around it. An old metal fence encircles it. I see old gravestones, stone angels with outspread wings, patches of sand, and a few tumbleweeds. The sun’s rays burn the nape of my neck. I feel like I’ve gone back in time. There’s a mysterious harshness in the air, eternal heat, the memories of all the people who walked along the pavement before me. Yes, this is what I feel like in here.
“Eerie, isn’t it?” Athena says.
“Yes.”
My phone rings, and I shudder. Athena smiles at me and nods so I take it out of my clutch bag. It’s my dad.
“Hi, sweetheart,” he says. “How are you?”
“Fine, thank you.” I inhale deeply. “Rebel—“
“Yeah,” my dad says. “Mike and I have talked about it a few times, and we think Rebel is your best chance for…” His voice cracks.
“Don’t worry, Dad.”
I hear a baby cry in the background. A female’s impatient voice follows.
“Daisy will help you,” my dad says. “Just ask her.”
“I will, Dad. Don’t worry.”
“I’ll visit one day.”
“When my brother is older.”
“Yes, when he’s older.” He takes a wheezy breath and coughs. “Mike and Daisy will always be there for you.”
“I know.”
“Rebel is a good kid. You like him, right?”
“Yes. Very much.”
He clears his throat, emitting a raspy sound. “Just do what you always do. You can cook and clean. You’re good at cleaning. Everything will be alright.”
Yes, our house has always been very clean. Daisy is like me. We love cleaning together.
Fatigue clouds my brain. “I need silence, Dad.”
“Sure, speak to you soon, sweetheart. Love you.”
“Speak to you soon. Love you. Bye.”
I put my phone back i
nto my bag, and Athena leads me back to Brianna’s place.
My dad sounded like he was happy with his life in Tibet.
I miss him, but I know his wife and son need him more than I do.
I’m a wife. I’m an adult.
But, I don’t know what to do.
Rebel
The boys grab my arms and haul me out of the chair. We tumble outside the apartment and I see Star sitting on the bench. She smiles at me, her hands placed neatly on her lap.
I move closer to her and kneel down. “Star, baby, how are you?”
“Fine.”
“I’m going to the Jilly Jet with the boys.”
Her face stiffens then she blinks a few times and her lower lip quivers.
I stroke her outer thigh. “But if you want me to stay with you, I’ll stay.”
“Can I go with you?” she shrieks as she clenches her hands in front of her stomach.
“You want to go?” Right. I am an idiot.
She nods. “I want to go with you.”
I hold her hand gently in mine and rise to my feet. “Let’s go then.”
Star rises from the bench and clings to me. I throw my arm around her back and Tyler leads us to the bar. We pass Gunner Senior’s place then go across the town’s centre and stop in front of Sive’s art gallery for five minutes. It’s closed so Star just plasters her face against the window and admires the drawings from outside the building. Tyler waves his hand. We pull forward; we pass a graveyard and Axel’s place. Hawk and his old lady, Christa, join us. Blaze greets us in front of the Jilly Jet. He gives me a bear-like hug as his long beard scratches my face, and we step inside the bar. A homey atmosphere engulfs me. I’ve never seen a clubhouse like this one. Two kids are playing in the corner and Blaze’s old lady, Maria, is standing behind the bar.
“Nikko,” Tyler growls and they hug each other.
I see a woman who’s wearing a police uniform. She stands beside Nikko and Tyler’s eyes darken at the sight of her.
“Sheriff Ashley,” Tyler says. “Meet my brother, Rebel.”
Ashley extends her arm and we shake hands. I’ve never shaken hands with any sheriff before, but this one looks like she belongs to the family.
“Your kids, Ashley?” Tyler asks as his face softens.
“Mine,” she says.
Right. There are the women and other women in men’s life. Ashley is this one unique woman in Tyler’s life. He’ll sometimes mumble something about her when he’s very drunk.
We spread out, and I drop into a booth with Star beside me. Maria brings us two glasses of orange juice and Blaze slams a bottle of moonshine on the table. Music starts playing. Billiard balls bang and the sound of laughter wafts through the air.
It’s nice.
My little bird is with me. I’ve never been this happy in my life.
I see Ashley grab her kids and exchange a few sharp sentences with Tyler. I can’t discern the words, but the sheriff sounds like she’s pissed off and Tyler sounds like he wants to threaten her. She points her finger to her kids and Tyler’s arms collapse as he steps back. Ashley exits the bar and Tyler freezes in the middle of the chequered dance floor under the crystal chandelier. He shakes his head and joins us, sitting in the booth opposite Star and me.
“To Star and Rebel,” Tyler says and we clink glasses.
His face is devoid of emotions, but I’m sure maggots are eating his stomach now.
I take three gulps. Tears prick my eyes as a sweet burning sensation layers my throat.
This homemade alcohol is strong as fuck, and my mind clouds after just two glasses. I pull Star closer to me and bury my face into her neck. She smells like spring. She feels like heaven.
I fucking love being her husband.
I want to do so many things with her.
No, I want to do so many horrible things to her.
“Star, baby, let’s dance.” I grab her hand and tug her towards the dance floor.
She giggles as I pull her into my embrace and kiss the top of her head.
“You are my wife,” I say.
“I know,” Star whispers.
“My little wife.”
“I know.”
“Married couples should dance and embrace.”
Her thick eyebrows arch. “I know.”
“And you know we’re gonna sleep in one bed tonight? Like husband and wife.”
“Yes, I know.”
I take her wrists and put her arms around my neck, my body pressed against hers. She shivers against me and blinks nervously. I know the reason for her nervousness. I’m hard and my dick’s rubbing against her tummy.
I plant a kiss on her forehead then slide my cheek against hers. It feels so good.
We sway, enveloped by slow romantic music, and I grip her slender waist. She’s so slim I can easily brace her with my hands.
My mind is intoxicated with her closeness. I kiss her cheek then the corner of her mouth. She stiffens, her wide eyes shifting to mine.
“Kiss me,” I rasp.
“I don’t know how.” Her porcelain face turns red.
A delicate pain squeezes my heart then a ravenous animal wakes inside me. I sink my fingers into her thick hair and slam my lips on hers. Star yelps into my mouth.
She tastes like spring. Her lips are so plump, so soft to touch. I feel her fingers sink into my hair. My arms wrap around her as I gently suck on her lower lip then thrust my tongue in. My whole yearning for her centres on that kiss. I kiss her deeper. I kiss her harder. She puts her fists on my chest and turns her face away from mine.
“You don’t like it?” I rasp.
I see her face sharpen then stiffen, and I know she’s far away from me.
I stroke her back up and down. “Slowly, okay?” My throat tightens and my heart sinks like it’s a piece of rock falling to the bottom of the dark sea.
She doesn’t respond, but her body shakes and I know I have to act. I shove her gently towards the exit, saluting towards the boys. They salute me back, no words necessary.
I go back to Zane’s place and ask Brianna to give us a lift, because I don’t want to ride my bike after I’ve drunk alcohol. Brianna agrees and takes us to Chaviva. The drive lasts half an hour, but it feels like ten hours. Star is here with me, and she isn’t. Brianna doesn’t comment, but her forehead wrinkles. I want to punch myself in the face.
Star is my responsibility now so I have to act as a mature man would. One thing at a time. A lot of patience. Good communication. Yeah, that’s a good plan.
My dick is so hard my mind clouds though.
Chapter 5
Rebel
We stop and get off. Star walks slowly as I push her gently forward with my palm against her lower back. We pass the reception desk and the restaurant. Three couples are sitting inside. Candles are burning on the tables and red wine in elegant glasses is sparkling. Star and I step into the elevator—mortal silence is creeping to every cell of my body. Then we enter our room. It has a modern décor—nautical blues, a bit of a bloody redness and white walls. A perfect room to spend our honeymoon here.
Star perches on the king-sized bed, her hands neatly on her lap. “I’m sorry.”
“No, sweetheart. Everything is fine. Don’t worry.” I kneel down on the wooden floor in front of her. “Are you hungry, darling?”
“No.”
“Thirsty?”
“No.”
“You want a shower?”
“I don’t know. Maybe.”
Okay. Be straight and precise. Star needs clear information on everything.
I huff out. “I want to have a shower.”
Her chin trembles. “What should I do?” Her hands start shaking.
“You want to join me?”
“I don’t know. Maybe.” Her head drops.
I rise to my feet and grab her wrist. “We’re gonna have a shower together.”
“I don’t know what to do, Rebel.”
“I know what to do. Don’t worry. I�
��ll take care of you.”
We should do things slowly and something tells me that the shower cabin is a perfect place where we could start getting to know each other intimately. We don’t need to fuck. I want to, but Star may prefer snuggling to proper fucking. We’ll see.
We enter the bathroom. I switch on the light and all the marble and ceramic surfaces reflect it, shining cream white and delicate pink.
I turn Star round so we stand opposite each other, an enormous mirror in a brown frame behind us. Her head drops. I hold her chin and tip her face up to mine.
“I’m gonna take your clothes off, Star.”
“Why?”
“Because I want to see how beautiful you are.”
“You think I’m beautiful?” Her eyes plead silently as her lower lip quivers.
“You are very beautiful to me.”
Her eyes shine and her lips curl into a smile. I love making my girl feel happy.
“Your hair is beautiful,” I continue. “Your eyes are beautiful. Your lips are…” I growl. “Perfect.” I kiss her softly. “I want to kiss your lips.” I kiss her again, longer, my teeth scratching her lower lip. “I want to kiss your tits and your pussy.”
There’s silence then Star takes a sharp breath.
“Okay.” She bobs her head at me. “Kiss… me.”
Good. I’m on the right track.
I gather her dress up to her waist and pull it over her head. My eyes roam over her white plain bra lifting her large tits and then I sweep my eyes over her cotton pink panties. Star hugs herself.
I remove my cut and t-shirt then slide my trousers down, leaving my pants on. A pile of clothes forms in the corner of the bathroom.
I pull Star to me. “You okay?”
She shivers against me. “I love you.”
“I love you more.”
She chuckles. “Will you love me forever?”
“Of course, my little bird.”
“And you won’t have any girlfriend except me?”
“Star…” I kiss the top of her head. “You’ve always been my girlfriend. And now you’re my wife. I want only you. I’ve always wanted only you.”
Her palms rest against my back, velvety soft against my skin, and she looks up at me. I’m so fucking hard it hurts, but I know I have to be gentle with her, one step at a time.
A sarcastic voice in my head tells me we’re doing a few steps in one go, but I ignore it.
Rebel (Devil's Tears MC Book 3) Page 4
