He walked with me, knowing we were the two people in the world she would want to see the most.
Tubes were everywhere, a machine was breathing for her, and she looked paler than I’d ever seen her. This strong and unbreakable woman had been desecrated by that madman. He tried to take her life, but he only took her strength—for a short time.
It was hard to look at her.
I should have protected her.
I stayed at her bedside in the hospital gown they gave me. Gloves were on my hands, and Thorn was dressed in the same ensemble.
Thorn and I still didn’t talk. We both stared at Titan.
“I owe you an apology.”
I turned to Thorn, unsure if I’d heard him speak because he hadn’t said anything in so long.
“I should have believed you,” he continued, his eyes on Titan. “If we’d both believed you from the beginning, this may never have happened.”
“You don’t owe me an apology, Thorn.” The only person who should be apologizing was me. It was my job to protect Titan, but I didn’t. I failed her.
I fucking failed her.
“I’m sorry anyway,” he whispered.
I watched her breathe into the tube, her chest rising and falling. She looked so small in the bed. She wasn’t in her stilettos and her designer clothes. She didn’t have her usual elegance and poise. She was a woman fighting to stay alive.
As if Thorn could feel my pain, he comforted me. “She’s going to be alright. The hardest part is over.”
“You think?” I stared at her small hand as it rested beside her.
“I do.”
I stared at my hands, feeling my breath come out shaky. “I keep telling myself that…because I couldn’t bear it if…” I refused to finish the sentence, to say the horrific words out loud. It was a fate I couldn’t contemplate. I’d rather die than live in a world where she didn’t exist.
“She’s the strongest person I’ve ever known. She’ll make it.”
I nodded in agreement. “She is a badass.”
“Yes, she is. She’d been shot in the chest, but she still kicked his ass. She’ll pull through.”
“You’re right.” It was the first time I felt slightly better. But until her eyes opened and she gripped my hand, I would still be uneasy.
I would be uneasy until I could tell her I loved her—and she could say it back.
Thorn drifted off to sleep in the chair, unable to keep his eyes open after being awake for thirty-six hours.
I hardly closed my eyes unless it was to blink.
Maybe I was delirious with exhaustion, or maybe I was energized by hope. Whatever the reason, my eyes hadn’t left her face as I kept waiting—kept hoping.
Finally, her feet moved. Her hand gripped the sheets. She took a deeper breath than usual.
“Tatum.” My hand moved to hers on the bed. The latex glove separated my skin from hers, but it was better than nothing. “Baby, I’m here.” I didn’t need to tell her it was me. She would always recognize my voice.
Her eyes opened, and she looked at me.
She couldn’t speak because of the tube in her mouth, but her eyes said everything she couldn’t. She squeezed my hand back, tears welled in her eyes, and she reached for me with her other hand.
I hit the button for the nurse and grabbed her other hand as I stood at the bedside.
The nurse came in a moment later, and they worked with the doctor to remove the tube down her throat. The machine was turned off now that she was breathing on her own. They examined her before they left the room again, giving us some privacy.
She cleared her throat several times, unable to speak.
I sat at the edge of the bed and grabbed both of her hands. I wanted to touch more of her, but out of fear for her injuries, I didn’t get too close to her. “How are you feeling?”
“I…I don’t know.” Her thumbs gently grazed over my knuckles. “I guess I feel good.”
My natural instinct was to squeeze her hands in relief, to feel her pulse strong against my skin. But I refrained from doing all the things I wanted to do. I wanted to crawl into that bed beside her and wrap my arms around her. “The doctor said you’re doing well. They just want to keep you for a while and make sure things continue to improve.”
Her eyes were heavy-lidded with fatigue, and she looked weak despite all the sleeping she’d done. “Diesel…I died.”
My hands went cold, my features frozen. The doctor had never mentioned to her that she’d flatlined during the surgery. “No, you’re here. You’re here with me, Tatum.” I squeezed her hands gently.
“No…I slipped away. I don’t know how long it lasted, but I was gone.”
I still hadn’t taken a breath, too tense to do anything.
“And I saw my father.”
She was on a lot of medication, including the aftereffects of anesthesia. So I didn’t contradict her or doubt what she’d seen.
“He told me he was proud of me…that he loved me.”
I held her gaze, my fingers caressing her.
“I know that’s crazy. I know how I must sound…but it happened. When he grabbed me, I felt him. I felt his spirit, and I think he felt mine. He told me I could fight and come back to this side…if I had something to live for. He told me that you have his blessing…and that you should forgive yourself.”
“Forgive myself?” I whispered.
“He said you felt guilty for not protecting me…”
I did feel guilty—and that sent shivers down my spine. It was something I’d been thinking about in the waiting room, had been thinking about since the moment she’d been shot. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you, baby.”
“Don’t apologize, Diesel.”
“I should have waited for you.”
“No, don’t do that…”
I took a deep breath and closed my eyes, stilling the emotion that had built up in my chest. I felt the tears before they started, felt the anguish before it truly emerged. Now that she was okay, I could finally let the dam open. I couldn’t keep the pain bottled up inside anymore. The tears formed in my eyes.
Two drops dripped down my cheeks.
“Diesel…” She squeezed my hands with her limited strength.
I took a deep breath and stopped the emotion in its tracks, swallowing it so it wouldn’t come back. That was the only vulnerability I was going to show. I never showed weakness in front of anyone. She was the one who’d almost died. Everything should be about her, not me. “I should have protected you, Tatum. I should have been standing beside you. I should have taken that bullet. This shouldn’t have happened.”
“But it did happen, Diesel. And I’m okay. That’s all that matters.”
She could say whatever she wanted to make me feel better, but it wouldn’t change my perspective. I asked her to be my wife, and that meant she was the single most important thing in my life. I’d have to do better now, to commit myself to her well-being every single day. “It won’t happen again.” I brought her hands to my lips and kissed them. “I promise.”
She squeezed my hands. “I know.”
I sat beside her and held her hands in silence. I savored the feel of her pulse against my fingertips, the sign of life underneath her skin. She was still with me. She was still right beside me. And she would still spend her life with me.
“Is he dead?” she whispered.
I nodded. “You killed him.”
“Good.”
I was glad she didn’t feel any remorse for it. Even if she took a life, it was in self-defense. It was her or him—and she’d made the right decision. “You never have to worry about him again.”
“I’m sorry I didn’t believe you in the first place, Diesel. Now I know I was wrong…and I paid the price.”
“Please forget about it.” We’d lost some time together, but we found each other again anyway. It didn’t matter what had happened in the past. Only the future mattered, and that future included both of us.
&nbs
p; “I’m still sorry, Diesel. I know how much I hurt you.”
“And you made up for it by asking me to marry you.”
She smiled. “I thought you asked me.”
“I did. We both did.” My large hands covered most of hers. I was twice her size, overshadowing her in every way. I knew that made her feel safe, and as long as I sat there, she would never have to worry about anything again.
Thorn stirred from his chair in the corner, and after wiping the sleep from his eyes, he looked at Titan. The last thought he had disappeared because Titan was the only thing in his mind. He left the chair and walked to the other side of the bed, his eyes trained exclusively on her. Love and fear were heavy in his eyes. The corporate executive who never showed a single expression was reduced to an emotional man. He stopped beside her and stared down at her, seeing the paleness I noticed the second I looked at her. His eyes roamed over her body, seeing the gauze poke out from underneath her gown. His hands rested at the edge of the bed. “I was so fucking scared, Titan.” He released a deep breath, as if he’d been holding it since the moment she’d been shot.
I released one of her hands, knowing I couldn’t hog both.
She grabbed his hand and held it tightly. “I’m okay, Thorn.”
He pulled up a chair and sat directly beside her, his hand still in hers. “I wouldn’t know what to do without you…you’re my best friend. You’re the only person who really knows me…” When his voice shook, he stopped speaking. He hid the emotion as quickly as it came, forcing his expression to return to masculine stoicism. Maybe it was because I was sitting there. Or maybe he just didn’t wear his heart on his sleeve.
I’d have offered to leave, but I refused to walk away from her.
“You’re my best friend too,” she said quietly. “And I’m not going anywhere. I’m right here, Thorn. I’ll be here every day to tell you when you’re being an ass and set you straight…”
He cracked a smile.
“This is just a bump in the road. I’ll recover and be back to normal soon.”
“I know you will.” His fingers interlocked with hers. “I’m so proud of you. That asshole had a gun pointed at your face, and you didn’t even flinch.”
“Like I’d give him the satisfaction.” Her voice was still gentle but full of hatred.
“You didn’t give up,” he continued. “You’d been shot in the chest, but that didn’t stop you. There are no words to describe that kind of strength…that kind of bravery.”
“It wasn’t either one.” She squeezed both of our hands. “I just had so much to live for.”
Once the staff no longer deemed her critical, they moved her to a new floor. She had a private room with her own living room and kitchen, and her hospital room looked nice enough to be a hotel suite. She was allowed to have more visitors, but I kept everyone away for the next day or two.
I wanted her to rest.
I was starting to get delirious from not sleeping. I hardly ate anything either. I knew she would be alright at that point, but I couldn’t leave her. My clothes started to feel uncomfortable, and my hair started to build up too much oil.
But I wasn’t leaving.
“Diesel.”
I was sitting on the couch near her bed, watching the mute TV while she slept. I turned my gaze to her. “Yes, baby?”
“Go home and get some sleep.” She looked small in the large bed, wires still hooked up to her body. Her hands rested on either side of her, and the engagement ring sat on her left hand. She still hadn’t taken it off—just as she promised me.
“When you go home, I’ll go home.” I turned back to the TV.
“Diesel,” she repeated. “You’re exhausted. Please go get some sleep.”
“This couch is perfectly fine.”
She sighed under her breath, her patience waning. “Thorn left.”
“He’s not your fiancé.” We weren’t married yet, but I already saw myself as her husband. If she was bedridden in the hospital, so was I. “I am.”
She rolled her eyes.
I caught it in my periphery, so I turned back to her, my eyes narrowed on her face. “Don’t test me, baby.” She might be on her way to recovery, but I was still on edge. Until I saw her strength returned to her and she was walking around on her stilettos, I would constantly be concerned.
A knock sounded on the open door. “Can I come in?” My father stood in black jeans and a long-sleeve dark blue shirt. It was a Tuesday, so he’d obviously skipped the office that afternoon.
Titan sat up higher in bed and smiled. “Please.”
I’d asked my family to stay away so Titan wouldn’t be overwhelmed. They’d done as I asked, but they couldn’t do it forever.
My father walked into the room and stopped at her bedside. “You look good, Tatum.”
“Thanks, Vincent.”
He leaned down and kissed her on the cheek.
If he’d done that a month ago, I would have punched him in the face. But I knew he saw her as a daughter, and she saw him as a father.
He rested his hand on hers. “How are you feeling?”
“Good,” Titan answered. “With every passing day, I feel a little stronger. The doctors said my tests are looking good, and I’m on my way to a full recovery. It’ll just take me some time to get there.”
“Knowing you, you’ll do it in half the time.” He squeezed her hand as he gave her a smile.
She smiled back. “I hope so.”
He pulled his hand away and placed it in his pocket. He turned his gaze to me. “You look tired, son.”
He called me that every chance he got. It was starting to become a habit I was getting used to remarkably fast. We went from not speaking for a decade to finding a relationship almost instantly. It was strange how normal it felt. “I’m fine.”
Titan shook her hand. “I’ve asked him to go home and get some sleep, but he’s very stubborn.”
My father chuckled. “He’s definitely the most stubborn son of the three.”
I liked how he referred to Brett as one of us.
“I could have told you that,” Titan said. “He hasn’t eaten or showered.”
“I’m fine,” I repeated, annoyed that this was still a conversation.
Titan rolled her eyes at my father.
“I saw that,” I said threateningly.
“Well, I made it pretty obvious,” Titan countered.
My father chuckled at our banter. “Diesel, go home and get some sleep. I’ll stay with Titan until you come back.”
I stared at my father, unsure what to say.
He slid his hands into his pockets. “I’ll watch her like a guard dog. I promise.”
“Go, Diesel,” Titan said. “I’m in good hands.”
I rose from the couch and stood over Titan, my eyes on my father. “You would do that?”
“Of course.” He wore a soft expression, but he still looked powerful in the way he held his thick frame.
“I know you’re busy, Dad,” I said. “You’ve got more important things to do.”
He shook his head. “Nothing is more important than family, Diesel. I’d love to spend time with my future daughter-in-law.”
My father was one of the most powerful men in this city—and the world. He could make anything happen with the snap of his fingers. He was frighteningly intelligent and built like an ox. No one would cross him—so they wouldn’t cross her. There was no better company she could have. The only other person I would leave her with was Thorn, but he was catching up on missed sleep. I turned back to Titan. “Are you okay with that, baby?”
“Yes,” she said irritably. “Now, go. I’ll see you later.”
“I’ll be back in a few hours.” I leaned down and kissed her.
She kissed me back longer than I expected, her kiss slightly sensual. “You’d better not be back in less than twelve hours. Otherwise, I won’t let you through the door.” She kissed the corner of my mouth before she let me pull away.
I r
ested my hand on hers, my thumb touching her ring. “Then I’ll be back in twelve hours and one minute.”
“And not a second sooner.” She gave me that look of love I adored, the one that said I was the only man in the world that mattered. I’d never seen her look at anyone that way. Even when she was engaged to Thorn and putting on a show, she never gave him that expression. Only me. “I love you.”
“I love you too.” I’d never appreciated that exchange more. I had been afraid I would never get the chance to tell her those three little words again. Now I got to say them, and I had the rest of our lives to say them. “Call me if you need anything.”
“Okay.”
I walked around the bed then stopped in front of my father. “Don’t leave her side, alright?”
He could have made a joke about my ridiculous protectiveness, but he didn’t. Bruce was gone and she had no other enemies out there, but that didn’t mean she was safe. I wanted someone to watch her at all times until she was healthy enough to look after herself again. “You have my word, son.”
4
Titan
The TV played on the wall, but I didn’t spend any time watching it. I wanted to ask someone to retrieve my laptop so I could get some work done, but I knew if Diesel found out, he would flip. He’d been through a lot, and I didn’t want to push him.
Vincent sat on the couch next to my bedside, his arm resting over the back of it. His eyes were on the TV most of the time, and the comfortable silence stretched between us just the way it did between Thorn and me.
Diesel had been gone for about five hours, and I knew he’d fallen asleep the second his head hit the pillow. He hid exhaustion from me well, but I knew he was slowly falling apart. He hadn’t eaten or showered since I’d been admitted to the hospital four days ago. He slept on and off when I slept during the night, but that would make even the strongest man buckle under the stress.
I was glad he finally took some time for himself.
“Need anything, Tatum?” Vincent asked.
“No, thank you. I’m fine.” I was still propped up in bed, a large window to my right. I could see the whole city from my floor. It was a nice view, reminding me of the view from my penthouse.
Boss Games Page 2
