And she was trying. Although she admitted to being nervous about riding a horse, she’d worn cowgirl boots and jeans, with a long-sleeved button down shirt and leather jacket. Of course, she looked as if she’d stepped out of a Ralph Lauren ad. But he wasn’t about to complain. She was making an effort for him and he appreciated it.
“You look great.” He took her hand and kissed the top of it. Their fingers intertwined and rested on the console between them.
“Thanks. You know I’m not a country girl, but for you, I’ll try anything.”
“And I love you for it.”
She gave him a big smile then looked out the window. “I’m eager to see how the barn looks. I didn’t realize you were going to be the one doing the painting. I told Cynthia to hire people for that.”
“It was tough to find someone over Thanksgiving weekend.” He shrugged. “And I didn’t mind. It was good to be working outside for a change, and it was nice to catch up with the Tanners.”
He may have imagined it, but her body tensed a little. “They seem like nice people. How well do you know them?”
“McKenna and I would go out and ride horses when we were kids and visiting Marietta in the summer.”
“So, McKenna was always with you?”
“No. She liked riding horses and all, but I liked to stay and help with chores, run around the ranch. Clayton was always happy to have an extra hand and I think Erin was, too.”
Vanessa slipped her hands from his and looked out the window again. “Well, it’s kind of them to let us use the property on such short notice. Of course, I’m sure what we’re paying them is helpful to their situation.”
“What situation?”
“It doesn’t take a genius to see that ranch is lacking funds, Lucas. Between what we’re paying them and the publicity this wedding will bring, they’ll be fine.”
“Are we there yet, Uncle Lucas?”
Lucas turned his truck into the driveway of Tanner Ranch, happy to be able to tell his niece that, yes, they had arrived at their destination. He’d barely brought the truck to a stop before Annalise unbuckled herself and crawled down from her seat.
“Where are the horses? Can we see them first, can we? Can we?”
Lucas had to laugh. Annalise was now standing, her tiny hands holding onto the back of the front seats as she hopped up and down.
“Sure. Let’s go find Erin so we can see the horses.”
They all climbed out the truck as Clayton came out of the barn. Lucas didn’t see Erin anyway, but she’d be there. They’d texted that morning, verifying plans.
“Hello there!”
Lucas took Annalise’s hand in his and did the same with Vanessa on his other side. They walked the path to the barn, meeting Clayton halfway. “Good morning, Clayton. Thanks again for letting us do this.”
“Thanks, Mr. Tanner. Your horses are the bestest in town.”
Clayton chuckled at Annalise. “Well, thank you kindly, young miss. I’m so glad you could come and visit. I hear you’re wanting to pick out a Christmas tree as well.”
The excitement that buzzed through his niece was palpable. Clayton looked at Vanessa, who smiled at him.
“It’s good to see you again, Clayton. Would you mind if I take a look at the barn? I’d love to see the work that’s been done.”
“Of course. Help yourself.” He pointed a thumb over his shoulder. “Take your time. Erin is saddling Hemingway for a ride.”
“Sounds great.” Lucas watched Vanessa disappear around the side of the barn. “You okay if we go say hi to the horses?”
Clayton nodded. “Yep. I’ll go grab the saws you’ll need for the trees.”
Lucas picked up Annalise and carried her to the stables. He found Erin inside, adjusting the straps of the saddle on Hemingway’s back. Lost in thought, she didn’t hear them come in. He was still getting used to seeing her with her hair down. Always in a ponytail or braid before, the loose waves that framed her face brought a soft, feminine glow to her skin. His fingers twitched at the memory of running them through the peach-scented strands as he’d kissed her. Thinking he was over it, that the one kiss would be enough, was a lie and he knew it. The longing he had for her overwhelmed him, he almost dropped Annalise from his arms.
“Airwin!”
Erin looked up and smiled. “Annalise!”
Her eyes met his and like a punch to the gut, the truth hit him. He had feelings for Erin Tanner and was engaged to someone else. And he had no idea in hell what to do about it.
*
It had been three days since Erin and Lucas had kissed and she was grateful the rest had gone by in a blur. Lucas had come back out to Tanner Ranch to help finish painting, but Erin was able to keep her distance. Having Tucker there helped. He and Lucas had chatted about life and work and school for Tucker. He’d love to ride in the rodeo circuit like Erin’s dad had, but his family needed him in Marietta so he was sticking around, thinking of taking a few classes in Bozeman if possible.
Erin had listened to the two men, relaxed by their conversation and relieved she didn’t have to be a part of it. There was something about working outdoors that soothed her soul. Lucas’s presence was also a bonus, but she couldn’t deny a bit of tension between them since they’d kissed.
She’d cried herself to sleep that night, but woke up the next day determined to move forward. He was marrying someone else. The sooner she accepted that, the better. He’d made his choice. It was time for her to make hers, one that involved a future without Lucas St. Claire.
As she moved around the stable, prepping the horses to ride that day, she let those tapes play over and over in her head. Move on. Don’t look back. Besides, they hardly knew each other now, right? She was going on feelings she’d had for so long. What if things had changed on a deeper level between them? The way he’d kissed her made her think otherwise, but even that wasn’t enough to build a relationship on. There were sparks between them, yes. But could their friendship be as close as it once was?
She moved the flap on Hemingway’s saddle to get to the strap that run under his belly. With a yank, she tightened it another notch. Deep breaths had gotten her through the past few days. They could get her through today. And Vanessa would be there. A stark reminder that there really was nothing between Erin and Lucas. There couldn’t be.
“Airwin!”
She looked up to find Lucas in the doorway, his niece propped up on one arm. “Annalise!”
Erin’s eyes met Lucas’s and all previous thoughts evaporated. There wasn’t a spark between them, there were all out fireworks. God, help her. When she’d had to let him go before, there’d been teenage stars in her eyes. Now there was a heat and desire that was all grown-up. She blinked, if only to keep tears from falling, aware her heart would always be his, but his would forever belong to someone else.
He set down his niece who ran to Erin and wrapped her little arms around Erin’s legs. “We’re so excited, Airwin! I love horses.”
Erin hugged back, marveling at the joy that radiated from the girl. She understood. Any time she battled sadness or these days, when she was worried about the ranch, she’d go for a ride and all of it blew away in the wind.
“I’m so glad you’re here. I love horses, too.”
“Can I pet him?”
“Of course.”
Most children were afraid of horses, their size alone intimidating. Which wasn’t a bad thing. They were powerful animals. Annalise had a healthy respect for their size, but not fear. She rubbed her hand along Hemingway’s side.
“He’s so soft.”
“He is. Do you want to feed him an apple slice?”
Annalise’s eyes grew wide. “Can I?”
Erin nodded. “Here.” She pulled a piece of apple from her coat pocket and placed it in Annalise’s hand. “Stand right in front of him and hold your hand out flat. He’ll sniff around and grab it with his lips.”
Annalise obeyed and Hemingway did just as Erin said he would. �
��It tickles!” The child’s giggle echoed in the stable.
Lucas had come up beside them, Erin aware of his presence, every move he made. “Thank you,” he whispered to her.
“Anytime.” She smiled at him then turned her attention to Annalise. “What do you say we get going on choosing a Christmas tree?”
“Yes!” Annalise hopped in the air with a fist raised. “Let’s do this!”
The three of them went out to the yard to find Vanessa coming around the back of the barn. Her smile faded when she saw them. “Well, where have you three been?”
It sounded accusatory to Erin, but Lucas moved next his fiancée, unaware of anything in her tone. “Annalise wanted to say hi to the horses.”
“I even got to give one of them a snack!”
“Hmm.” Vanessa glanced at Annalise but then turned her attention to the barn. “Now, Lucas. I love how the color has come out, but do you think that paint really will suffice in the weather? It’s due to snow this week. I want to be sure nothing fades or looks patchy.”
“It’ll be fine. Don’t worry.” He put an arm around her and gave her a quick kiss.
The intimate moment made Erin’s stomach turn and she looked away. Any fireworks that had been going off in the stables a few moments ago between her and Lucas washed away. The truth stared her right in the face.
Grateful to her father for showing up at that moment, Erin followed them as they made their way to the Christmas trees. Clayton stayed behind, his wheelchair able to go so far, but he’d handed off saws to them and had told Erin to pick a good one for their living room. Lucas was letting Annalise choose one for their house.
“Okay, squirt. Which one do you want?” Lucas swept his arm out wide.
“I can choose any one of these?”
“Yep.”
She hopped up and down as she clapped her hands. “Let’s see…” As she made her way through the trees, she commented to Lucas. “This one is too tiny. That one looks too big. Although Grandfather said to pick the biggest, bestest tree and our roof would be okay.”
“It’s your call.”
Lucas followed Annalise, chatting with her until she’d dwindled her choice down to two trees. Erin watched as the two of them looked back and forth from one tree to the other. Annalise tapped her finger on her chin. The sight of them made Erin’s heart ache for a whole other reason. Lucas was going to be a fantastic father. Always patient with his niece, he played with her and drew so much joy from being with her. His children would be lucky to have him, his wife even more so.
Erin looked at Vanessa who was a few steps away. Her head was buried in her cell phone though, none of her attention on Lucas or Annalise. Did she have any idea of what she had?
Frustration burned in Erin. She walked about ten yards away to a tree she’d had her eye on. She pulled her work gloves from her back pocket and put them on. Kneeling down, she took the saw and began working on the trunk. The energy it took to cut down the tree helped her work off some of her angst, but she questioned how she’d get through this holiday season.
Watching Lucas get married would be the toughest thing she’d ever have to do. Watching him marry someone who had no clue the ideal man she was getting might rip Erin’s heart to a point where she feared it might never recover.
Chapter Fifteen
Once Lucas, Vanessa, and Annalise had chosen a Christmas tree for the St. Claire house, Mike had texted saying he wanted them to ride another day. It had taken longer than they’d originally thought and the family wanted time to put up the tree and decorate it.
Erin had watched them drive away, waving and smiling at Annalise. Disappointed at first, the child had accepted her father’s decision and embraced the excitement of riding horses sometime soon. Erin’s heart had ached in her chest as they drove away. Drove away to their home filled with a big family, music, and laughter as they decorated their tree. Sure, she enjoyed doing the same with her dad, but there was one main difference. Lucas wasn’t a part of her Christmas merriment.
She wasn’t unhappy. She wasn’t. Once it was just the two of them, they’d put on some Christmas music, make hot chocolate, and enjoy taking time to decorate the tree and house for the holiday. Erin appreciated how her dad was intentional about honoring Thanksgiving. A man who had every right to complain about things found it better to look at all he had instead of all he didn’t. And Christmas was Erin’s favorite holiday.
Eric hadn’t called or come over though. He used to come over on the evening they decorated, but hadn’t the past few years. Her dad was sad about that, Erin could tell. But he hid it well for her sake. Although Eric had called her dad and said he was busy with work, Erin had a funny feeling he was lying. Her brother had trouble holding down a job because of his drinking. She hated doubting her brother like that, but history had proven it to be true.
For once, the weatherman had been right. A snowstorm had blown in the week after Thanksgiving. She’d woken up the morning after they’d put up the tree to a fresh layer of snow on the ground. The ranch looked like a winter wonderland found in a Christmas book. She couldn’t think of a better way to begin the holiday season.
Erin wrapped her scarf around her neck and tied it. As much as she’d loved taking time to decorate with her dad and enjoy the freshly fallen snow, they’d gotten back to work as usual, something Erin was grateful for. She hadn’t seen Lucas in over a week and although her heart was far from mending, at least it didn’t have to be reminded every day of what was missing.
There had been crews coming and going to the ranch though, Vanessa’s to-do list for the wedding getting items checked off each day. Cynthia had stopped by a few times to make sure all was well, sometimes with Vanessa, sometimes without. But Erin was busy with ranch chores so she was able to stay out of the way.
After getting supplies at Big Z Hardware and Lumber, she decided to stop into the Main Street Diner for lunch. She’d brought with her some paperwork she wanted to go over and a hamburger with fries sounded like the perfect thing to have while working.
Although it was cold, she decided to walk down Main Street, Big Z’s on one end and the diner on the other. She passed the Java Café, the scent of coffee tickling her senses.
The lampposts along Main Street held big red bows with garland wound around from top to bottom. Erin smiled. The Christmas spirit began to sink in. Her heart would mend. Like her dad always told her, she’d focus on what she had, not what she didn’t. And she had a father who loved her, a warm house, and life on the ranch. Marietta was her home full of friends and memories. It was where she belonged.
The Main Street Diner was almost full with the daily lunch crowd so Erin chose to sit on one of the red leather-covered stools and eat at the counter. That way she didn’t take up an entire table for only herself. She took a file from her bag and settled in to work.
As she looked over the spreadsheets and numbers concerning the ranch, she added all her years in college to her list of things to be thankful for. Math was not her strong suit, but those classes had helped prepare her to do what was needed to keep the ranch running.
However, even though the money they were receiving from the St. Claire wedding was a big chunk of change, it wasn’t going to get her and her dad out of the hole they were in. Almost, but not quite. She had to think of a plan moving forward. The conversation she’d had with Lucas about a Christmas tree farm came to mind. It would only bring in revenue during the holidays, of course, but maybe it would be worth looking at it in more detail. She’d told him they didn’t have the money or time, but maybe they did.
With her focus on the paperwork before her, she startled when a hand reached in front of her to grab a French fry off her plate and dip it into ketchup. She turned to watch as her brother shoved the food in his mouth and chewed.
“Hey, sis.”
“Eric.” One look and one whiff of him was all it took for her to know he was drunk.
“These fries are still some of the best around.” H
e swiped a few more from her plate and ate them.
Erin looked around. No one seemed to be paying any attention to them. It was loud, the lunch crowd in full force now. People with shopping bags sitting beside them having spent the morning getting a jump on purchasing Christmas gifts.
“I’d be happy to treat you to lunch if you’d like your own burger and plate of fries.”
She was irritated with him for not having made the time to see their dad at all lately, but she knew better than anyone that getting in Eric’s face would only lead him to cause a scene. Maybe a meal would do him some good.
“I can buy my own damn lunch.” He waved the waitress over and placed an order.
“I wasn’t trying to insult you, Eric. I’m happy to see you.”
“You sure about that?” He took a sip of water from a glass the waitress had set before him.
“You’re my brother. Of course I’m happy to see you.” She wanted to say that it would make her happy to see him more often, but he’d take that as an insult as well.
“You think Dad would say the same?”
“Yes. He misses you.”
Her brother scoffed then took another fry from her plate and ate it.
They sat in silence, Erin afraid to ask any questions that would get him worked up, Eric content to sit and eat the rest of her meal before his arrived. Once it did, he dove into it with vigor. Erin’s heart clenched at the thought of her brother not having anyone to cook for him. No one to have meals with. She had only visited Eric once at his apartment in Bozeman. With only a couch, a coffee table, refrigerator, and bed, it was downright depressing. He kept saying he didn’t need more than the bare necessities, but she wasn’t fooled. Any money he had or made from the various jobs he jumped to and from was spent on liquor.
His Christmas Bride Page 11
