“I’m done talking about this with you.”
“I only want to help you.”
The silence turned deafening. The only interruption for the remainder of the drive was the monotone voice on her GPS giving directions.
By the time they pulled into the hospital lot, he was eager for escape. “I’ll drop you at the door and find a parking spot.”
“You can go on home. Lexie will probably be here. I can catch a ride with her or somebody else later.”
“I’m not leaving until I know you have a ride.”
“Fine.”
As soon as he stopped the truck, she bailed out. Without so much as a thank-you. He was tempted to leave her to it. But as he watched her disappear through the door, with a pile of hurt and a heap of responsibility on her slight shoulders, he couldn’t do it.
Instead, he pulled into the parking garage and drove the aisles until he found an open spot. He drew in a steadying breath and got out of the truck. Ready to be there if she needed a ride home.
Why did he care if she held everything inside until she blew or fell apart? The only things he knew for certain—she didn’t trust him and he couldn’t afford to care about her.
* * *
Stacia stepped in the waiting room to find Lexie in a chair with Jayda in her lap looking at something on her phone. Lexie’s fiancé, Clint, sat beside her along with Lexie’s parents, Stella and Denny. Her vision blurred and she blinked several times to keep the moisture at bay.
After Larae’s mom died and then Stacia’s, Stella had become like a second mom to both of them. The need to share her burden balled up in her chest.
“Any news?”
All eyes met hers.
“Everything’s progressing just fine.” Stella patted the empty seat beside her. “Did you drive here alone? We should have swung by to get you.”
“I had to get the twins settled and Daddy thought I was too nervous to drive, so Ross brought me.”
Lexie’s eyebrows went up. “Where is he?”
“Parking the car. Can I catch a ride home with someone, so he can leave? He really needs to be manning the workshop, so Daddy can focus on the twins.”
“Sure.” Lexie squelched a yawn. “Clint and I will have to go home at a decent hour since I have to work tomorrow.”
“But I don’t want to leave.” Jayda groaned. “Daddy said I could stay until my baby brother is born.”
“Then you certainly will.” Stella clapped her hands. “Denny and I are here for the long run.”
“That is if you think your folks will let us shirk our ranch duties tomorrow.” Denny winked at the little girl.
“He’s here.” Rance stepped into the doorway, grinning from ear to ear.
“Already?” Lexie jumped up as Jayda scampered off her lap and ran to her father.
Rance knelt to scoop her up. “Raymond Laurance Shepherd made his appearance at 5:15. Mommy and baby are both fine. He’s twenty-two inches long and eight pounds, fourteen ounces. We’re gonna call him Rand.”
“Is Mommy okay?”
“Maybe a little tired, but other than that, she’s just fine as fine can be. Wanna see your baby brother and then Mommy?”
Jayda clung to him. “Can we?”
“This way, everybody.”
“We can all go?” Denny picked his cowboy hat up from the end table.
“For a few minutes.”
“That was so fast.” Lexie checked her watch. “I figured it would be hours.”
“Second babies often come in a hurry.” Stella stood. “Let’s go see the little darlin’.”
Stacia hung back, not trusting her emotions.
But Stella waved her on. The small crowd followed Rance with Stacia making up the tail.
A very tired Larae sat propped up in the bed holding a newborn. A thatch of dark hair, a tiny red face, screaming his lungs out.
“Why’s he crying, Daddy? Is he okay?” Jayda asked.
“He’s just mad cause Mommy’s tummy was warm and dark and cozy and he’s not sure he’s ready to be out here in the big, bright world.” Rance scooped the baby up as Larae motioned their daughter over. Jayda carefully snuggled into the bed with her mom.
A hand landed on Stacia’s shoulder. “You okay?” Stella’s kind chocolate eyes inspected her.
Only then did she realize she was crying. She swiped at her cheeks. “Just happy for them.”
“Me too.” Stella hugged her.
“He’s beautiful.” Stacia kissed her friend’s cheek, then stepped back so others could give their congrats. With no one paying attention, she eased out of the room. Needing air and time to compose herself, she made her way back to the waiting room.
Ross was there, flipping through a glossy magazine.
“You’re still here.”
He set the periodical aside. “I told you I wouldn’t leave until I knew you had a ride. Everybody okay?”
“They’re great. She had a boy, Raymond Laurance Shepherd. Rand for short, after Larae’s dad, and Rance. And Laurance after Larae’s mom, Laura, and Rance since his name is really Terrance.” She was rambling. “Can we get out of here?”
“Sure.”
He stood, followed her to the elevator. Three hospital staff members got on with them. As the doors slid closed, she texted Lexie that she’d forgotten to tell Ross he could go, so he was taking her home.
Once on the main floor, they made their way outside. “You could wait here while I get the truck.”
“I’m fine.”
“We’re in the parking garage over there.” He pointed and they headed in that direction.
She should thank him for waiting. But at the moment, if she said anything, she’d start blubbering. Instead they trudged to the cement structure and entered.
Seemingly miles later, she spotted his truck. It beeped when he clicked the fob.
Once inside, she buckled her seatbelt, leaned her head back, closed her eyes, and took deep breaths.
His hand covered hers.
But this time, she didn’t pull away. “I was standing in Larae’s room bawling my eyes out. How can I be so happy for my friend and so sad at the same time? I’m a horrible person.”
“You’re not. You’re a person who’s unable to have something you badly want.”
“I don’t know if I can do this. How can I hold her baby and act like I’m okay?”
“You have to tell her.”
“But I don’t want to put a damper on her happiness.”
“If you don’t tell her, she’ll wonder why you cry every time you see her.”
“I’ve held it together so far.”
“But you can’t keep bottling your feelings up.”
“I don’t. I pray about them.”
“And that’s great. But you’re not being honest with your friends. And from what I’ve seen y’all are really close. How do you think they’d feel if they knew you were keeping this from them?”
“But I can’t talk about it without crying.” She clasped her hand to her mouth, but a little moan slipped out as tears coursed down her cheeks.
“I think they can handle it. And so can I.” Ross leaned toward her, and strong arms came around her. “Stupid console.”
But she was glad it was there. He was way too close as it was as she soaked his shoulder and he awkwardly patted her hair.
* * *
How could Stacia act like nothing happened last night, while all Ross wanted to do was touch her hair again? It had been just as silky as he’d imagined and he’d had to force himself not to run his fingers through it all day.
She finished painting the coffee bar, pulled her mask down to under her chin and caught him staring. “What?”
“Um. I was, um, just thinking.” He pulled his mask down as well, trying despera
tely to come up with something other than the truth. “Wondering if you’re still sore.”
“A little.” She stretched her back. “But much better than it was.”
Stop staring. “Isn’t it about time for the twins to come home?” He checked his watch.
“It is. Mind if I open the doors, to help with the fumes?”
“Not at all.”
“At least it’s a little windy today. I’ll be glad when October comes. But then this is Texas, it may not really cool off during the day until November. Or January.” She opened the double doors and the breeze played with her hair.
“I wish—”
“What do you wish?”
That they could explore whatever made the air crackle between them. Was it them? Or just him? Think fast. Something to cover.
“That we all lived closer. It’s all so complicated. My parents aren’t the type to be long-distance grands. Especially since they’ve already missed five years of Mason and Madison’s lives.”
Something in her eyes softened. “You really don’t want to hurt anyone involved, do you?”
“Nope. Especially not the kids.”
“And you weren’t trying to manipulate me with the whole Adrian happily-ever-after offer, were you?”
“Nope.” In fact, he was pretty pumped that she didn’t love Adrian. Even if he couldn’t allow himself to fall for her. And she was making it tougher by going all soft, like she might could trust him.
“I’m sorry I’m so gun-shy. After my mom died, her sister came to stay with us and help Daddy. But it turned out, she wasn’t anything like Mom. Aunt Eleanor was very manipulative and my experience with her makes it hard for me to trust people. But I’m trying.”
Her phone made a sound and she checked it. “Looks like your background check came back clean.”
“Just like I said it would.” Could she find it in her heart to trust him now?
A knock sounded at the door from the store.
“That’ll be the twins. Do you think it’s okay for them to come in? I get so used to paint fumes, I can’t tell.”
How would he know? She made it hard for him to breathe.
He forced his focus from her and inhaled. “I think it’s okay.”
“Come in.”
Mason burst through. “Look at the picture I drew. My teacher gave me a gold star.”
They both met the boy as Madison followed him inside.
“That’s Uncle Ross and that’s you, Aunt Stacia, with me and Madison in the middle.”
“This is really good.” Ross inspected the drawing, typical stick figures in crayon. But the figures were all holding hands looking like a happy family. Just like he was beginning to wish they could be.
“Grandpa said Bluebell had her calf. Can we go see it now?” Madison asked.
“Let’s go.” Stacia took off her smock.
“Yay.” Mason scurried for the open door.
Stacia followed with Madison, then stopped and turned back. “Want to join us?”
“More than anything. But what about the workshop?”
“It won’t take long and we both could use a break.”
“Come on, Uncle Ross,” Madison called over her shoulder.
He followed the threesome, who’d become so important to him in such a short time. All three of them. But what could he do about that? He’d figure something out for him and his folks to be family with the twins. Stacia was a different subject. Could she ever trust him enough to explore a relationship with him? Or if he gave in to his developing feelings for her, would his heart get broken?
No. No. No. He’d been through this with Nora. Constantly trying to prove himself. Constantly trying to gain her trust. Constantly realizing he hadn’t when she did a one-eighty on him. He couldn’t go through that again. And besides that, he had to go back to Houston and help his folks with the store.
The part of the day when he was in the workshop with Maverick was beginning to be his favorite. They’d developed an easy rapport. So much easier than the constant tension between him and Stacia as he tried his best to guard his heart.
They stopped at the rail fence, where the cow grazed in the pasture with the calf close by.
“Can’t we see him up close? Pleeeease,” Mason begged.
“I don’t know.” Ross put plenty of caution in his tone. “Some mama cows are pretty protective. She might not like us getting any closer than this.”
“Uncle Ross has a point.” Stacia shrugged. “But I bottle-fed Bluebell after her mama died. This is her third calf and she hasn’t minded us getting close so far.”
“Just in case she has a change of heart, let me go first.” Ross held his hands up, motioning for the twins to stay put. “I’ll make sure it’s safe.” He climbed the fence, jumped down on the pasture side and slowly approached the cow. “Easy girl, we just want to see that fine baby you’ve got there.”
“Uncle Ross loves us, doesn’t he?” Madison said.
“He does.” Stacia’s agreement warmed his heart. “What makes you say that?”
“Because he wants to keep us safe, just like you do.”
“You’re very astute.”
“What does that mean?” Mason asked.
Ross inwardly chuckled, then continued sweet-talking the cow. No show of aggression and he was almost on them.
“You should be able to pet her,” Stacia coached from the sidelines.
“Hey pretty mama.” Ross set his hand on the cow’s back. She didn’t stiffen or twitch. “You’re just a big softy, huh?” He motioned for the twins. “She’s calm, cool and collected.”
The twins climbed over the fence and scampered toward him.
“We got a couple more coming to see your handsome fella.”
Stacia stayed put. The farthest she’d been from him when he was with the twins.
Were they finally getting somewhere? But he couldn’t let it go to his head. Or his heart.
Chapter Seven
It had been hard for Stacia watching from a distance as Ross and the twins interacted with the calf yesterday. But he was their uncle, and she needed to work at giving him free access to the twins, even if it killed her.
With the coffee bar she’d stayed to finish freshly painted, Ross still at the workshop and Daddy on twin duty, Stacia drove to Larae’s.
Since her friend had been home from the hospital for a day, Stacia really should stop in and see the new baby. She wanted to. Just didn’t trust her emotions, as she turned down the long drive. Hopefully, she’d cried all her tears out the night of little Rand’s birth.
Stella’s and Lexie’s cars were parked by the house. Gripping the steering wheel, she drew in a deep breath and killed the engine.
Rance met her at the door, wearing an apron. “Hey Stacia. Come on in.”
“I’m cooking supper with Daddy.” Wearing a matching apron, Jayda squeezed around him.
“I see that.”
“They’re in the bedroom.” Rance ushered her in. “You can go on up.”
“And stay for supper.” Jayda wiped her hands on her apron.
“I don’t think so. We’re going to Bible study and I promised the twins we’d eat at Dairy Queen in Bandera afterward. Maybe you could go with us.”
The longing was there in Jayda’s pale blue eyes. “No, I have to help Daddy with supper and Mama with the baby.”
“If you’re sure you don’t mind, Stacia, we’re good here. Jayda loves her Wednesday night class and there’s no need for her to miss church. Or anything else.”
“Mason and Madison would love for her to join us.” As much as Larae had helped out with the twins, it felt good to return the favor.
“Good idea.” Rance squeezed Jayda’s shoulder. “Your mama and Rand will be here when you get back.”
“Yes plea
se.” Jayda smiled.
“It’s settled then.” Rance ushered Jayda toward the kitchen.
“I’ll come get you before I leave.”
Stacia closed her eyes, drew in a calming breath and headed up the stairs. By the time she approached the open door of the master bedroom, she was all smiles.
“Hey everybody.”
Larae reclined in the bed, propped on pillows, with Lexie holding little Rand and Stella sitting on a loveseat nearby.
“Hey.” Larae reached for her hand.
“You doing okay?” She clasped her friend’s fingers.
“Just sore and tired. But good. Really happy.”
“I told her we don’t care if she sleeps, since we didn’t come to see her.” Stella chuckled.
“Want to hold him?” Lexie asked.
“That’s what I came for.” She took the warm bundle from her friend, wrapped in blue with a little face peeking out. His eyes, framed by inky hair, matched his blanket. Would little Rand keep Larae’s eyes or would they change to green like his dad’s? Baby shampoo and sweetness wrapped up in tiny innocence.
She’d never have this. Never have a child to wonder if he or she would look like her or her husband. Since most men probably wanted kids eventually, she’d likely never have a husband, even if she eventually found a man she could trust.
“Are you okay, darlin’?” Stella handed her a tissue.
Oh dear. She dabbed her eyes. “I need to tell y’all something.”
“What is it?” Stella patted the loveseat beside her. Always on alert at mothering all three of them, even though Lexie was her only child.
“I have the same heart defect that my mom and my sister had. My doctor recommended that I don’t have children.”
“Oh hon.” Stella put an arm around her.
Stacia leaned on her stand-in mom’s shoulder and let the tears come as Lexie swooped in to reclaim Rand.
“We suspected,” Larae said.
“You did?” Her voice came out wobbly.
“Well with what happened to your mom and Callista. Childbirth was the common denominator.”
A Texas Bond Page 10
