And Those Who Trespass Against Us

by Helen M MacPherson

  Me Lin gave Susan a soft kiss and left the two women.

  Susan closed the back door. "What's going on, and how is it Adele's found her way back into your life after so many years?"

  Catriona baulked at Susan's question, and she searched the room as if looking for something, or someone.

  Susan reached across and lightly took hold of Catriona's chin. She turned Catriona's face to her own. "There's no need to worry. Katherine set out very early this morning for the Connor farm. I don't expect her home for a while yet."

  Catriona's brows furrowed. "I didn't see her on my way into town." She contemplatively pursed her lips. "We should have passed each other, given the Connor property is next to mine."

  "She left early, and you're unusually late this morning," Susan said, a twinkle in her eye.

  Catriona flushed again. Susan snorted and she reached across and grasped Catriona's hand. "If you could only see the look on your face--it's precious. I'm sorry. I shouldn't be teasing you. Why don't you start from the beginning?"

  Catriona relayed to her how, by sheer luck, Adele was once again back in the Australian countryside. Catriona shyly told her of the rekindling of a relationship she thought was lost. Susan smiled at her fortune and, yet, at the same time Catriona sensed Susan was worried about something.

  "What are Adele's long term plans?" Susan casually asked.

  Catriona shifted in her seat. As she contemplated the idea of Adele staying, she couldn't help but hear a tiny voice in the recesses of her mind asking if that was what she wanted?

  She looked up and realised Susan was still patiently waiting for an answer. "We haven't discussed her plans. I'm fairly sure if I asked her she'd be more than willing to stay. Her tenure as governess to the family she was with is complete. I get the feeling she's a free soul."

  Susan raised both eyebrows, as if to silently state the obvious question.

  "I don't know. It's like for the first time in my life I have within my grasp what I want. Adele knows me. She's warm, humorous, exceptionally good looking, well educated, and an extremely sensual woman. As for her staying on a more permanent basis, I haven't thought about it." She realised that this was a lie, knowing a great deal of her time since Adele's arrival had been spent pondering just that prospect.

  Susan sat back and intently studied at Catriona. "Where does that leave Katherine?"

  Catriona's head jerked up as if struck. Was she so transparent? Angry at Susan's apparent ease in reading her thoughts, she retaliated. "She knows all too well how I feel, and she still left Gleneagle. Of course she figures in my daily thoughts. How could she not be there? But hell Susan, what else can I hope for between us? At least with Adele my feelings are reciprocated. I could spend the rest of my bloody life pining after Katherine, and she may never bloody well know what she wants. What I have now may be as good as it gets."

  "Are you sure Katherine doesn't know what she wants?" Susan continued in a level tone.

  "For Christ's sake!" Catriona pushed the chair out from under her. "What's that supposed to mean? She's here. I'm there. I truly don't think I can expect any more."

  "If you're so damned sure, then why does she spend the evenings here boring me to bloody distraction waxing lyrical about you? And how is it despite living here she spends an inordinate amount of time out at your property? Don't tell me it's got something to do with those damn books. They're a smokescreen, at best." Susan's nostrils flared and she gripped the edge of the table, in an obvious attempt to rein in her temper. "Answer me this if you dare. Have you spoken to Adele about Katherine yet?" She grunted. "I can see by the look on your face you haven't."

  Both turned when the door to the upper floor opened, admitting a concerned Me Lin. "What's the matter? I'm upstairs with the bedroom door closed and yet I can hear you both as if you were standing beside me."

  Susan stood and fiercely hugged Me Lin. After reassuring her everything was fine, Me Lin again left the two, but not before she cast a warning glance at Catriona.

  "I'm sorry, I didn't mean for my words to be so harsh or so loud."

  Catriona pinched the bridge of her nose and closed her eyes. "No, I'm the one who should be apologising." She sank back into her seat. "You're right about Katherine and it's driving me crazy. She does come and visit, and we talk about all number of things but it's like she's walking on coals. She begins to bring barriers down between us. But, when I move closer she puts them back up again. It's like she's afraid of herself and her own feelings." Catriona crookedly smiled. "And you're right--I haven't spoken to Adele about Katherine. Well, not in that sense anyway."

  "I think Katherine's feelings are confused by what her religious teachings say regarding what you shared, and she's as scared as hell. Not from eternal damnation but how to deal with the emotions which are pulling her apart.

  "I don't think she's ever been with anyone, man or woman. In matters of the heart, I'd hazard she's relatively naive. As for telling Adele, it's up to you. But is that fair?" Susan moved around the table and crouched by Catriona. "Can you truly be happy with what you have with Adele? If you can, that's all good and fine. Just don't end up despising her for something you never gave yourself the chance to have."

  Catriona scrubbed her face and neck. "You say Katherine speaks a lot about me and yet she doesn't know what she wants. I don't know what to do. Believe me, I've thought long and hard, and I still can't find a way forward. I'd appreciate any ideas you might have."

  "I do have one. I can't guarantee it'll bring her any closer to reconciling her feelings one way or another." Catriona nodded, encouraging Susan to continue. "I expect a large part of her problem may be coming to grips with the notion of a relationship between two women. So why don't we show her there's nothing wrong with this?" Susan held up her hands. "Don't look so shocked. I'm not suggesting you fall into Adele's arms in Katherine's presence. Remember I mentioned the idea of a dinner party a while ago? Have you given it any further thought? I believe it would be an excellent opportunity for Katherine to witness social interaction between women. Maybe it will set her thinking."

  Catriona pondered the idea, playing the evening through in her mind. Her heart missed a beat when she realised she'd have two women she had a deep emotional attachment to under her roof at the same time. Regardless, the risk was one she was willing to take.

  "Given the current circumstances, I suppose things can't get any worse. I'll approach Mrs. Johnston again about preparing us a meal. I'd approached her about such a possibility back when we first discussed a soiree. I'm afraid if you allow me to prepare dinner then the result may be unusual, to say the least."

  Susan looked at Catriona, eyebrows creased. "I think it would be a good idea if you spoke with Katherine first and made her aware of your visitor. I'm not saying tell her everything, but at least prepare her for Adele's presence."

  Catriona was rapidly warming to the idea of a dinner party. "I'll speak with her next time she's out at the house. After all, as you say she always incorporates a trip to the farm whenever she's out that way."

  Catriona's eyes searched Susan's. "Shit," they said in unison, simultaneously realising Katherine's homeward trip would undoubtedly bring her past the Pelham homestead.

  Chapter Thirteen

  KATHERINE BEGAN HER journey home, her thoughts dwelling on the smiles that had lit up the Connor children's faces when she gave them their books. It had certainly been a long time between drinks since they'd last received books.

  She smiled at her use of the colloquialism, recognising it as one of Catriona's favourites. A picture of her appeared in her mind's eye and Katherine sighed. Despite the contact she maintained with Catriona, she did miss their evening discussions and the humour Catriona managed to inject into a story about the day's events. That wasn't to say she was uncomfortable staying with Susan and Me Lin. They were perfect hosts. On three separate occasions, she'd managed to hold a conversation with the exceptionally serene Me Lin. During one such discussion they'd spoken a
bout the different philosophies of religion existing between western and eastern societies. Katherine was surprised at the contrast, with the west having a proportion of its foundations in fear and damnation and the east on peace and acceptance. Despite her western-based religious upbringing, she was deeply touched by the calming spirituality of Me Lin and her teachings, and she resolved to learn more.

  Although her friendship with Susan and Me Lin was one she treasured, in the quiet moments Katherine's thoughts strayed to Catriona. Their connection was nothing physical--it was moreso an invisible link between the two which made her feel at home in Catriona's presence. With her, she never felt that she had to conform to what everyone expected of her.

  She wondered how Catriona was faring. Her evenings had to be terribly quiet all by herself, not to mention her days. Resolute, Katherine clicked the reins. "In fact why don't I pay her a visit? After all, I do need to pick up some more books." She giggled, thinking what excuse she would have used to validate her visits if the books had been held at the store.

  After tethering the horse in the shade of the trees by the barn, she made her way to the back of the house and opened the unlocked door. She never ceased to be amazed at that. In Ireland, no family would entertain being away all day and leave the house unsecured. Out here it was the norm.

  She made her way to the study where the books had been relocated after her departure. She made herself comfortable on the floor and sorted through the books she'd need for the next few days. At the sound of footfall, a smile rose to her face. "I didn't expect to find you at home at this time of the day."

  She looked over her shoulder and her happiness turned to surprise. A tall, slightly Rubenesque figure covered by a light yellow blouse and skirt stood in the doorway. Her face had a paleness about it which hinted at a more genteel life. What struck Katherine most were her inquisitive violet eyes. "Who are you?" Katherine blurted out and scrambled to her feet.

  Adele's eyes crinkled, making her appear younger than she was. "I must unashamedly admit to having an advantage over you. You're obviously Sister Flynn." Stepping through the doorway, Adele extended her hand. "It's nice to meet you, Sister. My name is Adele Cooper."

  Catriona's last governess? she thought. The one who had gone to England? "Pleased to meet you." She took the proffered hand and quickly let go. "I'm sorry, if I'd known Catriona had guests I wouldn't have barged through the house like I did."

  "There's no harm done. In fact she's told me of your arrangement."

  Katherine's eyes widened slightly, and despite her best attempts she fidgeted, something she hadn't done since she was a teenager. Gripping one hand in the other, she at last managed to get her nervousness under control.

  Katherine cleared her throat. "She told me all about you as well."

  Miss Cooper raised a hand to her throat, as if to conceal the colour rising there.

  "She told me you were the one who taught her how to paint the lovely watercolours around the house. She has a real eye for detail. Her mixing of colours makes the paintings come alive. They're truly wonderful."

  Miss Cooper released a breath. "She was a good student with an eagerness to learn. I don't think anything I taught her about painting helped her though. Her talent was always there. It would have been uncovered sooner or later at an opportune moment in time."

  "That may be so, Miss Cooper, but it's certainly not how Catriona tells it. When I was living here she spent many an evening discussing your influence." Katherine motioned toward a chair.

  Miss Cooper took time to smooth her skirt and then met Katherine's enquiring gaze. "I thought Susan mentioned you were living at the store. I didn't realise you've also lived here. It's a shame you're still not out here, Sister Flynn. I'm sure we could have had some wonderful discussions during the course of an evening. Between the two of us we may have even convinced that stubborn woman to paint again."

  "Miss Cooper, I'd feel a lot more comfortable if you'd call me Katherine. Sister Flynn is so out of place out here, don't you think?"

  Miss Cooper nodded. "And you must call me Adele," she said, a smile lighting her features. "I believe there's enough formality in the world without imposing it where it needn't be."

  Katherine felt herself warm to Adele. Given her previous employment, it would be very interesting to spend the rest of the afternoon speaking with her. She was sure Adele would have some wise words on the ways of teaching children. "I'm sorry that I have to head off so abruptly, especially since we've only just started to get to know each other. But if I'm to get to town before dark, it's best I leave now." She stooped and picked up the books she needed for the coming day.

  "That's a shame. I'm sure we would have had a lot to talk about." Both women walked out through the kitchen to where Katherine's wagon was tethered.

  "If you find yourself out this way in the near future, Katherine, I'd really love it if you would call again. Maybe I could share some stories with you about Catriona."

  Katherine was grateful her back was to Adele when those last words were spoken. She felt her features change to petulance, somewhat annoyed that Adele had taken her place in Catriona's household. She seated herself and reined in her emotions. "That would be wonderful. Although I don't think I'll be out here in the next week or so. Thank you for the offer all the same."

  ADELE WAVED AS the wagon pulled away from her. She lowered her arm and frowned. "That was an interesting turn of events," she murmured. "I'm sure Susan didn't mention you had lived out here. And why hasn't Catriona said anything?" She headed back to the house wondering why Katherine was so nervous and uncomfortable in her presence.

  AS KATHERINE NEARED the entrance to the property, she took stock of her meeting with Adele.

  For all intents and purposes Adele was a lovely woman. Yet, despite this Katherine had a niggling feeling. Was it because she'd usurped Katherine's position? Or because she resented the fact that Catriona now had a guest and no longer needed her company? What makes me think I have sole ownership over Catriona? Those are selfish thoughts.

  They're more than that, a voice inside her intoned. They're the words of a jealous woman. Angry at the stupidity of such introspection, she urged the horse into a canter, nearly causing it to collide with a rider coming toward her.

  Catriona struggled to rein in her horse. "Slow down! You'll do yourself some damage, knock someone over or both."

  "I'm sorry. I'm in a hurry to get home before dark and wasn't looking where I was going. How are you?"

  Catriona finally managed to get her horse under control and reined in next to the wagon. "I'm not too bad. I'm keeping busy with the current crops and new planting at the moment. Between that and going into town there just aren't enough hours in the day."

  Katherine made pretence of wiping dust from the front of her habit. "It must be a relief to have someone in the house then."

  "Er, yes. Adele's visit was unplanned. I'm thankful for her company all the same."

  Katherine tried to judge whether Catriona's last comment was related to her exit and dismissed the thought. "She's a lovely woman. She was your last governess, wasn't she?" Catriona nodded. "It's a shame I had to leave so soon for I'm sure we could have found a number of things to talk about."

  "I suppose so," Catriona noncommittally replied. "By the way, I was speaking with Susan this afternoon and she mentioned a wonderful idea. She suggested we all get together for a dinner party. I've organised the meal preparation side of things with Mrs.Johnston."

  "That's a relief." Katherine smirked. "The idea of you serving steak and eggs to your guests is probably not what they had in mind for a dinner party."

  "Thank you very much for your vote of confidence," Catriona humorously chided. "Will you come?" she asked, her tone somewhat subdued.

  Katherine looked into Catriona's pleading eyes, and she reached across and gently touched Catriona's leg. "Of course I will. Just because I no longer live here doesn't mean we can't be friends." Despite her words, the feelings welli
ng inside her at their sudden contact felt like something more than friendship. She removed her hand as inconspicuously as possible. "It'll give me an opportunity to get to know Adele."

  Catriona sat back on her horse, suddenly distant. "I expect it will. Could you tell Susan I've scheduled the dinner to be next Friday--that's if it suits you all? If not then let me know and we'll arrange it for another time." Drawing the reins of her horse toward her, Catriona nodded and continued up the drive.

  Katherine shook her head at Catriona's sudden distance and, at a loss to find a root cause for it, turned horse and wagon for home.

  CATRIONA WASHED HER hands at the kitchen sink and gathered her thoughts. Having Katherine out for dinner had been a wonderful concept when Susan had raised the idea. But where did it leave her and Adele?

  She sat and rested her chin on her hand. Am I chasing something I'll never have, when what I want is with me now? A soft pair of hands affectionately kneaded the knotted muscles of Catriona's shoulders.

  Adele leant down and gently kissed her cheek. "Hello, stranger. You've been gone a fair while. I had a visitor while you were away."

  Turning around, Catriona placed her hands on Adele's waist. Her hands traced a lazy path up to the fullness of Adele's breasts. Catriona pulled Adele to her and rested the side of her face on her soft stomach. She relished the feel of the smooth fabric on her skin. "I know. I saw Katherine on her way home."

  Adele idly traced a pattern in Catriona's hair. "She's quite a nice woman, a bit nervous though. She acted surprised to find anyone out here. She mentioned you had told her all about us. I trust you weren't altogether candid about our relationship?"