by Ramona Gray
“Shut up,” Luke said. “Shut the fuck up.”
“Ooh, hit a nerve there, did I?” Jeremy said. “Listen, man, it’s better for you that you know how Jane really is. She’s got that sweet girl act down to perfection but she’s using you for your money. It’s what she fucking does. She don’t care about anyone but herself. She’s a snake who hides in the grass and bites you when you least expect it.”
Luke stared at him and Jeremy shrugged. “Keep dating her – you’ll find out. I was smart enough to kick her ass out of my bed before she got too much of my hard-earned money but you don’t strike me as that smart. Jane’s got a tight little pussy, I’ll give her that, and men like you are always blinded by pussy.”
Rage pulsing through him, Luke punched Jeremy in the face. The smaller man fell off the stool, landing on his back with a harsh thud as his bottle of beer smashed on the floor and splattered him with liquid.
“You fucking asshole!” Jeremy gasped as blood poured from his nose.
Luke bent over and grabbed the collar of his shirt. He lifted him until their faces were inches apart and said, “Go anywhere near Jane and I’ll kill you.”
“Get off me,” Jeremy said as fear flashed in his eyes. “Get off me or I – I’ll call Tony.”
Luke barked harsh laughter and dropped him. Jeremy’s head bounced off the floor and he winced before scrambling away from him. “Fucking asshole! Get out of my club!”
“Gladly,” Luke snarled. He turned and stalked out of the club.
* * *
Jane knocked on Luke’s office door. Today was her first day back in Mark’s department and even though Maria was obviously curious about why she was no longer working with Luke, she hadn’t pushed too much for the reason. Kyra had welcomed her back with no questions asked and Jane was thrilled to discover that Mark was arranging to have her take some accounting classes. She was still worried about losing her second job but she’d hidden it from Luke when he’d popped by before lunch to ask her to type a quick document for her.
Right before the end of the day, he’d sent her an email asking her to come see him. She smiled happily to herself. Maybe he would go with her to see Mama J tonight and then spend the rest of the evening with her. It was worrisome not to have the extra money from the club and she knew she would have to find another second job, but she’d maybe take a week or two and enjoy her extra time with Luke.
“Come in.”
She opened the doors and stepped into Luke’s office, closing them behind her. Luke was sitting at his desk and he didn’t look up as she approached his desk.
“Hi,” she said.
“Hello, Jane.”
Her smile faltered as he looked at her. She sank into the leather chair in front of his desk. “Is there something wrong?”
He sat back in his chair and folded his hands across his lean abdomen. He was acting so strangely – stiff and cold – and apprehension trickled down her spine.
“I went to see your old boss at the club today.”
“What?” Her mouth dropped open. “Why – why would you do that?”
“I went to apologize and ask him to give you your job back.”
Warmth flooded through her and she smiled at him. “You did? That’s really nice of you, Luke. Thank you.”
“It didn’t work,” he said.
“I’m not surprised. Jeremy isn’t - ”
“Did you fuck him?” Luke interrupted.
The colour drained from her face and she said, “Wh-what?”
“Did you fuck your boss at the club?”
She swallowed and nodded. “Yes. I dated Jeremy for a while.”
Anger flashed in his eyes and he looked away from her before standing and pacing back and forth in front of the window. “I didn’t want to believe him.”
“What did he tell you?” She asked cautiously as she stood.
“Did he help you with money?” He asked.
“I – well, he bought me some groceries once or twice when I was really low on food,” she said.
He laughed bitterly and she gave him a defensive look. “I didn’t ask him to do it. He offered.”
“Of course,” Luke said. “So, is this what you do, Jane? You sleep with your boss? It’s some kind of game to you?”
“No!” Jane said. “Luke, I tried not to sleep with you because of what happened with Jeremy. I realized it was - ”
“Tried not to sleep with me, huh?” Luke said. “Guess that didn’t work out so well for you. Although, I’ll admit you put on a good show for quite a while. You did an amazing job of getting me all hot and bothered for you and worried that you were going to starve because of me. Getting your heat and electricity cut off because I forced you to buy better clothes was a nice touch. Very convincing.”
“What are you talking about?” She whispered as Luke turned and glared at her.
“How did you manage the rent thing? Hmm? Or was that a lucky coincidence that you used to your advantage?”
“I don’t know what you mean,” she said. “Luke, calm down and tell me exactly what Jeremy said to you.”
“It doesn’t matter,” he said. “It’s over, Jane.”
“What do you mean?”
“It’s over between us. We’re done,” Luke said coldly.
“You’re firing me?” She whispered as fear stabbed at her heart. How would she care for Mama J?
More bitter laughter exploded from his mouth. “Right, it’s the money you worry about most isn’t it?”
She chewed at her bottom lip and didn’t say anything as Luke gave her a disgusted look. “No, I’m not firing you, Ms. Smith. But what’s happening between us is finished. Don’t contact me outside of work. Do I make myself clear?”
“Perfectly,” she whispered.
“Good.” He turned and stared out the window.
Her throat aching and tears sliding down her cheeks, Jane left his office and hurried away.
* * *
Jane ignored the knocking on her bedroom door and continued to scroll through her phone. She wrote down a phone number before clicking on the next listing. She frowned. The apartment was in the Badlands and she had hoped to avoid that area but based on her budget, she didn’t think she had much choice. She had applied for a few part time waitress jobs tonight but she didn’t expect to hear back from them for at least a week and didn’t know for sure that she would even get an interview. She needed to find a place to live that she could afford on her current salary. With the cost of Mama J’s care, that meant the Badlands.
“Jane?” Amy knocked again. “Please let me in.”
She sighed and rubbed at her forehead. “Come in, Amy.”
Amy opened the door and peeked into her room before holding out the mug she carried in her right hand. “I brought you tea.”
“Thank you.” She scrolled through her phone again as Amy set the mug of tea on her nightstand and sat beside her on the bed.
“How was Mama J tonight?” Amy asked.
“Not great,” Jane said. “She didn’t remember who I was and she was very upset because she couldn’t find Walter.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Me too,” Jane said as she wrote a phone number down on her pad of paper.
“What are you doing?”
“Looking for a new place to live,” Jane said absently.
“What?”
Amy’s outraged tone had her looking up in a hurry.
“Why the hell are you doing that?”
Jane set her phone down and sipped at her tea. “Your brother broke up with me yesterday.”
“I know that,” Amy said. “He was in a foul mood this morning and he said you had broken up. I’m sorry, honey.”
“Thanks,” Jane said.
“I know it isn’t any of my business but,” Amy paused, “what happened? You two seemed perfect together.”
“He didn’t tell you?” Jane asked.
“He wouldn’t give me any details. He just said that you wer
e no longer together. What happened, honey?”
Jane sipped at her tea again, grateful that Luke hadn’t told Amy that she was a whore who slept with her bosses on the regular. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Jane - ”
“I respected your privacy when you said you didn’t want to talk about Mark,” Jane said gently.
Amy pressed her lips together. “You’re right. I’m sorry and I won’t pry again. But I don’t understand why you’re looking for a new place to live.”
“I can’t live with you anymore.”
“Why not?” Amy said.
“Because your brother hates me and he’s your brother.” Jane wondered if Amy was being deliberately obtuse.
“I don’t care,” Amy said. “You’re my friend and I like having you live with me. You don’t have to move out. Yeah, Luke’s my brother but it doesn’t mean that I’m going to automatically agree with all of his choices. I don’t know why he broke up with you but whatever it was, he’s stupid for doing it.”
Tears welled up in Jane’s eyes. “I don’t want to come between you and your brother. Family is what’s important.”
“You won’t,” Amy said. “I love Luke and I love you, and you being my roommate won’t be a problem. I promise.”
“It might be,” Jane said. “If it does, I’ll move out. Okay?”
Amy rolled her eyes. “Yeah, okay, but it won’t be a problem.”
Jane didn’t reply and Amy rested her head on her shoulder. “I’m sorry it didn’t work out with my brother, Janie. He’s an idiot.”
“He isn’t,” Jane said. “Besides, it’s better this way. It would never have worked out between us – we’re too different. I was a fun distraction for him and he just got swept up in the moment.”
She forced herself to smile at Amy. “It’s good that he realized how he really felt.”
“Honey, did you tell him that you loved him?” Amy asked.
“No, and it’s good that I didn’t,” Jane said. “I’m embarrassed enough and it would have been much worse if he had realized that I fell in love with him. I was an idiot to think I could have a relationship with him.”
She wiped briskly at the tears that were sliding down her cheeks before sipping at her tea. “This is really good. Thanks, Ames.”
“You’re welcome, honey.”
* * *
“Mama J?” Adrenaline pulsed through Jane’s body as she hurried into Mama J’s room. It was Thursday evening, she had come straight from work to see her foster mother. It was just after dinner and it was unusual to find Mama J in bed rather than her chair by the window.
“Mama J? Are you all right?”
She breathed a sigh of relief when the old woman looked over her shoulder and smiled at her. “Hello, my Janie.”
“Hi. Why are you in bed?” She asked as she dragged the chair over and sat down. “Are you not feeling well?”
“I’m feeling a little tired today,” Mama J said.
“Do you want me to come back tomorrow?” Jane asked.
“No,” Mama J said. “It’s been so long since I’ve seen you, Janie. Why didn’t you visit me last night?”
Jane smiled at her. She had visited but wasn’t surprised that she didn’t remember. “I’m sorry. I was a little busy last night.”
“Of course you were,” Mama J said. “You have a new boyfriend. How is he? Did you bring him to visit me?”
Jane froze. She hadn’t really expected Mama J to remember Luke without seeing him and sharp pain stabbed her in the chest. She had kept her emotions under control today – it had helped that she was on a different floor and didn’t have to worry about running into Luke – but she was suddenly very close to crying. Luke had been so kind and sweet to Mama J and knowing that she would never see that side of him again made her want to burst into tears.
“Janie?” Mama J touched her hand and at the look of love and sympathy on her face, Jane began to cry.
“Oh, my Janie,” Mama J said. She shifted over in the bed and patted the empty space. “Climb into bed with me, sweetheart. Come on now.”
Blubbering like an idiot, Janie climbed into the bed next to Mama J and buried her face in her throat. She clung to her foster mother as Mama J stroked her hair and murmured soft words of comfort.
After a while, her sobbing eased to the occasional sniff and she took the tissue Mama J handed to her. She wiped her eyes and blew her nose before resting her head on Mama J’s thin chest.
“Better, Janie?”
“Yes,” she whispered.
“Did you and your man have a fight?”
“Yeah. He’s really angry with me over something I did in the past.”
Mama J snorted. “Men can be so foolish about things sometimes. He’ll come around, Janie, I promise you.”
“I don’t think he will,” Jane said.
“He will. I’ve seen the way he looks at you. He loves you.”
Jane didn’t reply and Mama J put one finger under her chin and tipped her face up. “He loves you. He looks at you like Walter looked at me and if there was one thing I knew for certain about my Walter – it was that he loved me.”
“I wish I could have met him,” Jane said.
“Me too. He would have loved you,” Mama J replied. She stroked Jane’s hair as Jane rested her head on her chest again.
“Listen, sweetheart, your man will realize the error of his way and come back to you begging for your forgiveness. I guarantee it. I know I’m old and getting forgetful but I haven’t forgotten what I’ve learned about relationships. Will you take a bit of advice?”
“Yes,” Jane said.
“When he comes around asking for forgiveness, don’t make him grovel too much. It can be hard for some men to admit when they’re wrong. If he says he’s sorry, if he asks you for your forgiveness, give it to him without much fuss. Love grows sweeter when you forgive easily. All right?”
“Okay,” Jane whispered. It was easy to tell Mama J what she wanted to hear. Luke would never ask for her forgiveness. She had fooled herself into thinking that he might care for her despite who she was and what she had done. Men like Luke didn’t fall for women like her.
“That’s my good girl, Janie,” Mama J said. She ran her fingers through Jane’s soft hair. “Don’t tell my other kids this but you were always my favourite. I remember the first day I met you. The last few years had been difficult ones for you – your social worker had told me all about it – but I could see the goodness and the sweetness on your face. I knew you were something special right away.”
Jane smiled at her. “I’m not the special one. You are. You saved my life, and I will never be able to repay you for that.”
Mama J kissed her forehead. “I love you, sweetheart.”
“I love you too, Mama J,” Jane said. “Always.”
* * *
Luke leaned back in his chair and rubbed at his eyes. They were burning and itching from lack of sleep and he stared blearily at his watch. It was the longest goddamn Friday of his life and he wanted to get the hell out of the office and go home. He planned on spending the weekend getting very drunk. Maybe then he would sleep. Maybe then he would stop thinking that he’d made the biggest fucking mistake of his life.
He closed his eyes and then popped them open almost immediately. Fuck, would he ever have a moment where he closed his eyes and didn’t see Jane’s face? He had promised her that he would always take care of her and instead, he’d ended it. God, the look of hurt and betrayal on her face when he had told her they were finished. It had nearly killed him.
So then why did you end it? His inner voice complained. You miss Jane, I miss Jane – talk to her.
There was a knock on the doors to his office before they opened and Mark walked in. He sat in the chair across from him and stared at him.
“What?” Luke said irritably.
“You look like shit.”
“Unless you have something work related to talk about, I’m not i
nterested in chatting.”
Mark didn’t reply and they sat in silence for a few minutes before Luke blurted out, “I broke it off with Jane.”
“What? Why?” Mark said. “I thought you moved her to my department so you could date her.”
“I did, but then I found out something…”
Luke trailed off and stared miserably at Mark. His best friend leaned forward and said, “Tell me what happened.”
* * *
Half an hour and a shot glass full of whiskey later, Mark put his feet up on Luke’s desk and leaned back in his chair. “You’re an idiot. You know that, right?”
“You’re not helping,” Luke said.
“I am,” Mark insisted. “You need someone to be straight with you and I’m the asshole who’s gonna give it to you straight.”
“Fine,” Luke said. “Get it over with.”
“You’re in love with Jane Smith. That’s fucking easy to see and you went and screwed it up because you hate that she fucked that wanker from the club. You hate the fact that Jane had sex with someone you think is beneath her.”
“That’s not it at all,” Luke retorted. “She sleeps with her bosses, Mark. That’s what she does. She sleeps with them for their fucking money. I was just another boss for her to fuck and take advantage of.”
“You asshole,” Mark said. “Did you even listen to her side of the story?”
“No,” Luke admitted.
“So, you’re taking the word of that scumbag at the club over the word of the woman you love. A woman who is ridiculously sweet, who went so long without food that she passed out in your goddamn office. A woman who has worked two jobs for how fucking long to pay for the care of an old woman who isn’t even her family. She lived in the fucking Badlands with no heat and no electricity in the middle of the goddamn winter. She bought clothes instead of food when you made fun of her wardrobe.”
