by Cee Smith
“It doesn’t matter, does it?”
“It does to me. I want to know.”
“What if I told you I had imagined marrying you, making you the mother of my children, spending the rest of my days here, in this house, with you?”
“I would say you were delusional,” she responded quietly, without so much as a trace of anger or spite in her words. She continued before I had a chance to respond, “But I don’t think you did think that. In fact, I would go so far as to say taking me was the most impulsive thing you’ve ever done in your life. Which scares me because that means you never had a plan or thought as to what my life would look like long term. Everything comes to an end, Dominic—even us.”
A sort of panic gripped my chest, and I felt like she could hear the frenetic scatting of my heart hammering through my ribs. She was right, of course. Besides helping me with my medical condition, I didn’t really think about what our day-to-day lives would look like together. I was too gripped by having her. That was all I cared about then, and it was all I thought about now. I got out of the tub before I let her ominous words sink in.
The limo stopped on the tarmac just outside a small plane with three little windows reflecting the pale blue sky. I’d never been nervous about flying, but as I sat staring at the sleek jet, I felt a slight tremor roll through my stomach. I didn’t know what made me more nervous: being on the plane with Dominic for three hours, or that this was the first time in weeks that I’d been beyond thirty feet of the house, and he was taking me somewhere extremely public. I would be seeing Dominic in his natural setting, amongst people that were his friends and colleagues. As usual, when it came to Dominic, I had no idea what to expect.
Silence hung like a thick curtain between us. Aside from sleeping in the same bed, this was the longest we’d been in the same room together since last Wednesday, since I called him out on our future, since he hightailed it out of the tub like hell hounds were after him.
I’d spent the previous week seriously analyzing the extent of this fucked-up relationship we were in, and all I could come up with was that we’d changed each other. Like chemicals mixing to create a new compound, we were still figuring out what we were. In the short time that I’d known him, I didn’t know who I was anymore. I wondered if he did.
What he said was true. I had no idea what I would do with my time now that school was finished. My life had become so thoroughly entwined in his. I didn’t know what prompted me to ask him about our future, except maybe I was scared by the idea of having nothing to do besides waiting around to be fucked by him. I had my suspicions that he took me somewhat impulsively, but seeing the expression that passed his face when I pointed it out to him was devastating. He looked crushed.
I felt awful because more than trying to convince him that what we had wasn’t real, I was trying to convince myself. This world he had created for us wasn’t real. The feelings this man made me feel for him weren’t real. All of this was fabricated by him. Every touch, every kiss, every word just added to the delusion that I was falling for this man. Sex with him was an emotional overdose fueled by our conflicted emotions, and the comedown was tragic—for both of us. While I internalized my confusion over my feelings for my captor, Dominic used sex as a way to distance himself from what he was feeling.
I tried pushing aside thoughts of my feelings for him so I could focus on more important things, like putting together a possible plan of escape. I wasn’t stupid. I knew this could be my only shot at freedom and I had no intentions of missing the opportunity if one should present itself, but I was also terrified of what Dominic was capable of. How far was he willing to go to keep me silenced?
“Are you ready?” His grumbly voice broke through my train of thought as I realized he was already outside the door with a waiting hand. I scooted across the soft leather seats, and his hand reached out for mine as I maneuvered out of the car in the mint green dress that fit my body like a glove. I held the bottom of my dress in one hand while holding onto Dominic’s elbow with the other, trying as gracefully as possible to walk up the flight of stairs. Once inside, Scout closed the door before vanishing in the cockpit.
“We’re over here.” I followed the motion of his cocked head. The airplane was the perfect picture of luxury with soft cream leather and gold-piped seams. On the left was a table with a surrounding leather booth. Behind the booth, underneath a row of windows, was a small couch where Dominic had motioned. I followed him to the couch, taking a seat and buckling in, while the captain reminded us of our flight time and existing weather conditions.
“Are you nervous?” He asked as the jet started rolling down the tarmac.
“A little.”
“Don’t be. John’s a great pilot. You have nothing to worry about.”
“I’m actually a little more nervous about this event you’re taking me to. It’s the first time I’ll be around other people, and I’m scared. What if someone recognizes me?”
“I’ll be with you the entire time. Just remember what I said, and you’ll do fine.”
“Can I ask you something?” He nodded his head prompting me to continue, “Why are we going? Don’t get me wrong—you look very handsome in your tux, and I feel like an old Hollywood glamazon, but it seems like it’s not worth the risk.”
“Before I took leave, we were working on a deal with a man—some would consider a liability—and we’ve hit some snags in the deal. I need to show my face to smooth things over. I’m sure having you on my arm won’t hurt.”
“So am I playing the role of ‘arm candy’?”
“Well, it’s not like it would be hard. If I haven’t already told you, you look fucking stunning tonight. I’m sure this deal isn’t the only one we’ll be closing because of you.”
“Thank you, I guess?”
“You’re welcome.”
It was on the tip of my tongue, and instead of waiting for him to ask me what was on my mind like he usually did with his telepathic ways, I rushed out, “You know, this is the most you’ve talked to me since the other night.”
His hands immediately crushed against his slicked back hair, mussing it up slightly as they fell back against the seat.
“It’s my fault that you feel comfortable enough to talk to me like you do. You forget your role in all this, but let me make it perfectly clear: I own you. I can and will do anything I want with you, and you should be worried about me getting tired of putting up with your bullshit because you’re not some rescued animal that will be freed back into society. No, me getting rid of you wouldn’t mean your freedom.”
His eyes were empty and cold, and I shivered as I looked into their depths. This was the most hurtful thing he’d ever said to me, and I felt tears beat against the back of my eyes. I sniffled them back, subsequently failing in my attempt to keep from ruining my heavily made-up face. Hopefully, there would be time to fix my makeup in the car, because I was sure that despite Dominic’s sour mood, he wouldn’t change his mind about attending.
“Believe me when I say there isn’t a day that goes by that I forget my role. Save your threats before I beat you to the punch and decide to off myself instead.”
His hands trembled as he fumbled with his belt. The metal made a small clicking sound before he jolted up from his seat. His fingers crushed my upper arms as he yelled, “Don’t you ever fucking say shit like that to me again!” His tanned face burned bright red as he continued yelling.
“You think you’ve had things fucking hard? I could keep you chained 24 hours a day with only a bucket to piss in. Keep talking like that, and I’ll make it a fucking reality. Fuck!” He dropped into the seat next to me, righting himself before he continued, “I swear to god you’re doing this shit on purpose. Are you trying to fuck this up? Don’t answer that. You’d probably lie anyway.” I couldn’t tell whether he was talking to me or himself at this point, but I suddenly wished I were sitting in the booth at the table.
The flight attendant chose the worst possible time to ma
ke an appearance, asking if we would like anything to drink. My eyes were large as I frantically nodded my head, trying to save her from the madman to my left. She barely met my eyes when he barked out, “Leave us the fuck alone! For the rest of the flight, I don’t want to see anyone else back here. Got it?” She nodded erratically, her eyes trailing from his to mine, before finally escaping back to the cockpit.
“Get up.”
My hands were shaking as I moved to unbuckle the belt. As soon as he heard the click of the belt separating, he pulled me up against him, whipping me around so my back was to him. The sound of the zipper whizzing down my dress was like hearing a knife being sheathed. I knew where his mind had turned. Emotions were too high. He was frantic, with pupils so big his eyes looked like black holes. His movements were fragmented, and air huffed from his mouth like an asthmatic running a marathon.
“Don’t leave your dress on the floor like a fucking dishrag. Pick it the fuck up.”
Meekly, I stepped out of the dress and carried it to the table, laying it out across the flat surface. His jaw was steel. With his nostrils flaring and fists clenching, he was hardly the man I had come to know. It seemed that the beast was never very far away as he so comfortably morphed into a monster. Like a snake shedding its skin, I was seeing the real Dominic beneath.
“Take it off.”
“Dominic, plea—”
“Are you defying me?” He moved to unlatch his belt. I frantically unclasped my bra and let my underwear fall down around my ankles before stepping out. With hands held high, I dropped down to my knees, hoping my show of submission would appeal to him. A brooding, fully-dressed Dominic, standing over me while I was naked fucked with me psychologically. Making me strip was always Dominic’s favorite way of showing dominance over me, but I had never felt as lowly as I did in that moment. I had never been at the foot of a man, much less one as temperamental as Dominic.
“Please. You know I’ll do whatever you want to do, but please not like this.” My words had no effect on him. He didn’t move, didn’t speak. There was nothing to suggest that he could hear me, let alone understand the language I was speaking. His eyes continued to stare into mine, but it was like he was looking through me.
“Just wait a minute. Breathe. Take a seat. Breeeathe. Please.” I had never really challenged him before this, and I wasn’t too sure that reasoning with him would do anything to change my circumstances, but what was the alternative?
It was absurd, but every time Dominic and I had had sex, I had been a willing participant, wanting everything he offered me. He’d never been especially cruel—not even that first night when he smeared his come across my face. But this, this would hurt me, and I was surprised to see how nonchalant he seemed about the whole thing.
He took a step back, followed by another until he was falling into the seat at his back. He continued looking at me—lost, broken, empty—I couldn’t grasp which look resonated with me most as he raked over my quivering breasts.
When his breathing had returned to normal, I found myself crawling over to where he sat. My movements caught his attention, and he looked down at me, still at knee level. I swallowed, and it was like shuffling sand around my mouth. Moving between his legs, I reached over his lap to unzip him and his hand slapped out, stopping my motion.
“Please. Let me do this for you.” Dominic used sex like a soothing balm for his brokenness, and it was the one thing that I knew could calm his thunderous thoughts. He gave me an infinitesimal nod and I took him in my mouth, closing my lips around him. The soft sigh that passed his lips sounded a lot like resignation as I licked him into oblivion.
The limo pulled up outside of the side entrance to the theatre housing the ball. I hated these things. The original purpose was for like-minded people to be able to mingle in an informal setting so bastards already rich could become even richer. Most of the time, it ended up being the lesser rich just kissing the asses of those richer than them.
It didn’t help that this night was ruined the moment we stepped on the plane. Or had it been ruined ever since our conversation in the tub? I couldn’t determine, but I was in no mood to mingle or have my ass kissed.
Hailey sat huddled against the door on the opposite end of the car, looking towards the theatre that was lit up like a Christmas tree and decorated with hoards of ostentatious people. I watched the reflection of her face in the window. Her mouth was slack, and her eyes shone with wonder. The car stopped and her legs started bouncing. I reached out to ease her discomfort, but pulled back at the last minute. My touch would only be more unsettling, and I couldn’t bear to watch her cringe away from my touch.
I knew that all eyes would be on Hailey—not just because she was gorgeous, but because she was magnetic and simply vibrant. She was the real reason I decided to go to this thing. Fuck Sampson. Sure I would have lost time and money if the deal fell through, but there was never a deal I couldn't walk away from.
“Scout, can you give us a moment?” I asked before he exited the vehicle. The silence was unbearable. She hadn't said more than two words since dropping to her knees in the plane, and I knew I had set us back. When I thought about it, it had all been my fault. Everything. Hailey wouldn’t feel comfortable saying things that got under my skin, if she had never felt comfortable speaking that way to me.
Since she’d arrived, I’d grappled with how far to push Hailey outside of her comfort zone while still keeping her under my thumb. It was a fine line I walked. As she was finding her voice, she continued pushing boundaries, and I only had myself to blame when she went too far. I didn’t want to silence Hailey. She wasn’t some blow-up doll just to be fucked for my amusement. She was fast becoming a piece of me, as essential as an arm or a leg, but I wasn’t ready to admit that I needed her.
“Dominic?” My name was a touch above a whisper as she questioned the dismissal of Scout and the subsequent silence that stretched time until I could practically hear the pendulum swinging between us. Or, was that just the monotonous beat of my heart?
“Hailey, about ear—”
“It's behind us. Nothing happened, right?” I looked at her hands tightly folded in her lap and watched as her eyes flitted from my eyes back to her hands. She couldn't even look at me longer than a minute, but her voice was light and airy like the girl I watched walk between classes with her friends. Back then, watching her left me seething, brimming with an unexplained anger. I didn’t understand it at the time, but I wanted to be the reason for every emotion that she felt—happiness, sadness, rage, frustration. I wanted to own them all.
“You make me fe—” No, I couldn't tell her that. I couldn't let her know any more of my feelings. She already knew more than I wanted her to. My feelings were the catalyst for the plane incident. “I went too far. I know that. You look beautiful tonight, and I just want to be able to enjoy our night together, outside of the house.”
“Of course, Dominic.” She didn't exactly say she forgave me, but then again, I didn't exactly apologize.
“Are you ready then?” She nodded her head, and I tapped the darkened window, alerting Scout that we were ready. I looked back at Hailey and her halo of golden hair dancing around her shoulders in loose waves. I heard the door open, but I was too mesmerized by the way her plump little lips parted in the center to let air escape her mouth. I took one last look at her before exiting, and her lips spread into a thin smile. It wasn't real. Was any of it?
***
“Callas, long time no see. What have you been up to? Robert tells me you’ve taken some time off,” Winston shook my hand while patting me on the back like we we’re long lost friends. My grip tightened while watching as he visually raped Hailey right in front of me. “Oh, I see why the need for time off. Who is your friend?”
I dropped his hand, grasping Hailey’s hip and pulling her closer until our bodies aligned from shoulders to knees. Her hand moved to the front of my chest as she dipped her head to Winston, acknowledging his guarded compliment.
When I looked down into her eyes, it was like it was just the two of us again, back at the house, lost in our thoughts together. She gave me a small smile, oblivious to the discomfort Winston expressed in the moment we were having. He looked from my face to hers and back to mine, shifting his feet.
I noticed the faint taste of her cherry lip balm as I captured her mouth. Her lips parted allowing my tongue to slip in partially, and I relished the soft touch of her lips and her forgiving tongue as she reached out to meet me.
Winston cleared his throat and Hailey clamped her lips shut, ending our kiss. “This is my Hailey,” I said still looking into Hailey’s eyes, trying to read her reaction to my words. She looked unaffected, and I couldn’t tell whether that was a good thing or a bad thing.
“You’re a lucky man. I’m sure you’ve noticed she’s definitely captured most everyone’s attention, but then again maybe that was your intention.” Hailey peered over my shoulder, her eyes dancing across the room, before she turned back to Winston. “You flatter me too much. Most of the men and women here, I’m sure, are far more captivating,” she replied.
“Oh, don’t kid yourself. They may be worth bundles of money, but they’re far from ‘captivating.’ Besides, your man here has money that could buy these people out of the room.” She looked at me, her head tilted slightly, as if she’d worked out another piece of my puzzle.
“Would you excuse us?” I didn’t wait for a response before turning to leave; Hailey was stiff, but she didn’t say anything as I pulled her away. That was Hailey’s first time seeing me around other people, and I wondered if she considered me brash. What she didn’t know was that Winston was a bottom feeder who thought he could get in my good graces by tossing a few compliments to my companion.
We worked our way through throngs of people milling about. Winston was right about one thing—Hailey did stand out. Most of the women in the room were either successful in their own right or were trophy wives and only worth as much as their husbands. Either way, all of those women were hungry for more—more beauty, more money, more men. Hailey, on the other hand, was worth millions, but you wouldn't know it by being around her. That was another thing I admired about her—both she and her sister had inherited their parent’s money when they died, but they lived simple lives. They were humble.
