by R. Linda
“Want me to go in first?” he asked. Geez, I felt like such a wimp. Man up, Nate, and get in there. It can’t be that bad.
“Nah, I’ll go.”
Taking a deep breath, I followed Brody into the room and stopped at the edge of the bed. The first thing I noticed wasn’t the girl completely covered in bandages. It wasn’t the machines, or the tubes attached to her. It was the emptiness of the room. No flowers. No teddy bears. No balloons. Not even a single get well card.
I rubbed a hand over my chest to ease the ache that occurred the moment I realised this girl truly had no one. Where was her family? The aunts and uncles? Grandparents? Cousins? Her friends? Why hadn’t anyone been to visit? Not even a god damn neighbour? No…but they were all out on the street watching as the house burnt down around her.
Brody was silent as he pulled up a chair and sat beside the bed. His head in his hands, he whispered, “I feel helpless.”
I nodded. There were no words for this situation. This girl was all alone. She had nothing.
“I’ll be back,” I said, taking a step back and almost tripping on my own feet.
“Where—” I was out of there and running down the hall before Brody could finish asking his question.
I wasn’t losing the plot. I wasn’t running from the room, or my fear, or my guilt. I was on a mission. I needed to do something for this girl. For Audrey. I needed to show her it would be okay, and she wouldn’t be alone.
I followed the blue signs on the walls until I came across the gift shop. The woman behind the counter stared at me in shock when I asked for the teddy bear behind her. It was four feet tall and about two feet wide. I grabbed flowers, not knowing anything about Audrey. I just picked four bunches of the most colourful flowers in the store. Balloons, two more small teddy bears, and a pink and purple blanket—not that she needed it, but it would make the room feel less like a hospital when she woke up.
I could barely carry it all back to the room, needing to stop every so often to readjust everything in my arms so I didn’t drop it.
I finally made it back to Audrey’s room and nudged the door open with my foot. Brody almost fell off his chair when he saw me walk in with my arms loaded.
“What are you doing?”
“Look at this room. It’s empty.” I shook my head sadly and handed Brody the flowers so I could put the bears down. “I can’t let her wake up alone and in pain to nothing.”
Brody clenched his jaw and swallowed. If I wasn’t mistaken, I’d have even said his eyes glazed over before he cleared his throat and stood. “Right. Good. I’ll just go and find something to put these in.”
He walked out and left me alone to stare at the girl. She was asleep. On so many medications. They didn’t want her to wake, not until she started healing. I wondered what would happen when she woke. Would she remember what happened? Would she block it out like Harper had? Did she have any family anywhere? Where would she go? The thought of her having absolutely no one and getting lost in the system didn’t sit well with me. It wasn’t fair.
Brody returned a few minutes later with four jugs of water to put the flowers in.
“Where is everyone?” I asked him.
“What do you mean?”
“Her friends and family.”
Brody tucked his hands into his pockets and dropped his head. “As far as they know, there is no one. She has no other family. They have no one to contact.”
“How can that be?”
“I don’t know.”
We sat silently for a few minutes just watching her sleep. At least her room finally looked as though someone cared and wanted to be there for her. I’d hate for her to wake up to an empty room and realise no one had been to see her.
“Ready to go?” Brody asked.
“Yeah.” It was getting to me then. I couldn’t get out of there fast enough. She was consuming my thoughts, and that was the last thing I needed, since she already plagued my dreams so much I couldn’t sleep.
We didn’t speak much on the way home. The weight of what we’d seen settled on our shoulders.
“We have to help her,” Brody said.
“How?”
“I don’t know, but like you said, the thought of the girl waking up alone and scared and in pain isn’t right…I’m going back. I’ll keep visiting her and try to find out whatever I can about her situation, see if there’s anything we could do.” He nodded as though he was talking himself into it.
I wasn’t sure I could handle seeing her all the time. The guilt would gnaw away at me and destroy me.
“Hungry?”
I shook my head, the same time my stomach rumbled.
“I’ll take that as a yes.” He laughed, and against my weak protests, pulled into the roadhouse. The last place I wanted to visit.
It was late. We’d been gone most of the afternoon, and the sun had well and truly set. I hesitated, not wanting to get out of the car in case I saw Harper. The chances were pretty high. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to see her. I did. I just didn’t want to see her around Brody. Things were awkward enough as it was after last week.
“Dude?” Brody called to me when I sat frozen in the front seat.
Rolling my eyes, I got out and followed him inside the empty diner. Julie was behind the counter like always.
“You boys take a seat. Food won’t be long.”
“Thanks, Julie,” I said and wandered over to a booth. It was pretty bad that we didn’t even have to order anymore. We walked in, and she fed us.
“How’d you go with the ice machine?” Brody asked, spinning the salt shaker on the table.
“What?” I frowned in confusion.
“Julie wanted you to look at the ice machine last week.”
“Oh, yeah…” I snapped my fingers and pointed at him. “That’s right. Uh, nothing. False alarm. It was fine.”
Brody narrowed his eyes at me. I thought it was a good lie.
“What?”
“Nothing.” He smiled up at Julie when she delivered our food.
Halfway through eating, Brody’s phone rang.
“Damn. I gotta get this…Hello? Yeah. Really?” He listened as the caller spoke. “Okay. No, that’s great.” Another pause. “Yeah, I’ll bring her down. Thanks, man.” He hung up and wiped his mouth clean before standing up.
I raised my eyebrows in question. Where was he going halfway through a meal?
“I, ah, gotta go. That was a buddy of mine at the police station.”
“The police station?”
“I had him check into Chace after he showed up at the uni last week to harass Kenzie, and he’s got some info. I’m going to take her in to chat with him.”
“Okay, sure.” I took a sip of my chocolate milkshake that only Julie knew how to make.
“You coming?”
I went to stand but thought better of it. “No. I’m still eating.”
“You right for a lift home?”
“Yeah, I’ll be fine. I’ll call Linc.”
“All right,” he said and walked off.
I finished my meal and leaned my head against the back of the booth.
“You look like shit.” I peeled my eyes open to see Johnny standing above me with the elastic from his hairnet cutting into one eye.
“Thanks,” I grumbled and yawned. And before I could stop myself, I asked, “Harper upstairs?”
“Depends.”
“On what?”
“Whether you’re going to go up there only to tell her you can’t be friends or something stupid like that again.”
“No. I…” I couldn’t argue with him or tell him I’d never do that, because I basically told her that last week, that we needed to keep our distance. But right then, I really needed a friend, and not just any friend. I needed Harper.
“You’ve been warned.” He pulled his spatula out from nowhere and put it against my neck like a knife.
“Got it.” I raised my hands in surrender.
Johnny grunted a
nd walked off, so I dragged my feet to the stairs that led to Harper’s room.
Chapter Twelve
Harper
The words were blurring together. Stretched out on my stomach on my bed, I’d been reading this stupid text for so long, I was sure my eyes would be permanently crossed. Earphones in my ears, my entire playlist had repeated twice. It was almost the end of the semester, and I had an exam on Friday to study for. I didn’t understand why our uni ran on a different schedule to most that had already finished for the year, but it did. Country towns, I guessed. I was looking forward to the break.
A song I really enjoyed came on, and once again I began tapping my highlighter on my book while simultaneously kicking my feet and nodding to the beat. Multitasking at its finest.
Something brushed against my ankle and jerked my foot. Must have been a blanket or something. Then it happened again, only it wasn’t brushing. It was grabbing. Wrapping its warm fingers around my leg. I froze. Someone was in my room and touching me.
Heart pounding in my chest, and my breaths coming hard and fast, I yanked the earphones out of my ears and twisted to look.
Nate.
I breathed out a sigh and slumped back onto the mattress.
“Sorry.” He shifted my feet and sat on the edge of my bed. “I knocked, but you didn’t hear.”
“Music.” I held up my headphones in response.
His warm hands lifted my legs and placed them in his lap. He didn’t bat an eye at the fact I was only wearing a tank top and underwear.
“What are you doing here?” I asked after a while of silence. He looked broken. His normally styled hair was a mess. His eyes had lost their sparkle. They were red and puffy and had bigger black bags beneath them than I had in my closet.
His fingers began kneading the muscles in my calves, starting just above my Achilles and inching slowly up my leg. I bit my lip to stop from moaning. I’d never had a leg massage before, and it was amazing.
“I could do with a friend.”
“And everyone else is busy?” I couldn’t stop the bitterness in my voice even though his hands on my skin were making me feel everything but bitter.
“No. I don’t know. I didn’t try them. I wanted to see you.”
“Why?”
He didn’t answer. He concentrated on the movements of his hands, the pressure he applied.
“I haven’t slept,” he murmured.
“Since when?”
“The fire.”
“Nate…”
“I know. I just can’t sleep. Every time I close my eyes, I’m back there.”
I pushed myself to a sitting position and picked up all my books, papers, pens, and highlighters and dumped them on the floor.
“You can’t go on not sleeping. Come here.” I grabbed his hands and pulled him toward me.
He let me, climbing onto the bed beside me. “I shouldn’t stay long, you know…” he said as he settled his head into my pillow.
All resentment I’d been feeling for the past week gone. It didn’t matter that he made me share my darkest secret. It didn’t matter that he told me we were only friends. It didn’t matter that he hadn’t bothered to visit or talk to me, his friend, for the last week. All that mattered was that he was here, and he needed me. He wanted to see me.
“You should…stay. Just to sleep.”
“I can’t sleep. I don’t want to.”
“With me. I’ll be right here. You’re going to hurt yourself if you don’t get some rest soon.”
“Harper.”
“I’m not taking no for answer.” I sat up and crawled to the end of the bed to remove his shoes. Pointing my finger toward the roof I said, “Up.”
Nate sat, so I removed his shirt and threw it on the chair in the corner of my room. Then I thought better of it and grabbed it for myself instead.
Nate groaned.
“What?” I turned to face him after I’d pulled his shirt on and removed my tank from underneath.
“You in my shirt.” He flopped back onto the pillow and covered his face with his hands.
“You don’t want me to wear it?” I looked down and fiddled with the hem.
“No. I mean…” He dragged his hands over his face and lifted them behind his head before nailing me with a gaze that made my knees tremble. “I just like you in it too much.”
“Well, that’s perfect,” I said, moving to lie beside him.
“Why?”
“Because I like wearing them.” I lifted my head when he shifted his arm to wrap it around me and rested it on his chest. Friends didn’t lie together like this. “And I like you better out of them.” I placed my hand on his chest and tapped my fingers in time with his heartbeat.
He cursed. “You can’t say that sort of thing, friend.”
We weren’t friends. When was he going to give up the charade? We couldn’t stay away from each other. We’d proven that time and time again. A three-month-long secret affair followed by a three-month-long break from spending time together in any way. And it all came undone when Indie returned, forcing us back together. The pull was so much stronger this time. It was undeniable. Tangible. Strong. There was no fighting it.
His lips pressed against the top of my head, and his fingers found their way under his shirt to trace small circles on my hip bone, searing my skin with his touch. Friends definitely didn’t lie together like this.
I fell asleep with my hand on his heart and his lips in my hair. But that wasn’t the best part. The best part was he fell asleep too.
Sometime through the night he became restless, tossed and turned. Shook his head and muttered incoherently while still asleep. The moonlight cast shadows on his face, outlining the pained expression, and I knew he was having a bad dream. Not wanting to wake him because he was finally sleeping, and he needed it more than anything else, I whispered, “It’s okay. It’s just a dream,” over and over while gently smoothing the creases on his forehead. He calmed down after a while, and I was able to drift back to sleep.
I woke in the morning to find myself completely tangled with Nate. Our bare legs were woven together, and I was practically lying on top of him. My arms were wrapped around his waist, my chest pressed to his, and his hands…
His hands.
I felt them everywhere.
My skin tingled from his touch. One hand twisted firmly into my hair, cradling the back of my head and holding me against him while the other dragged leisurely circles under my shirt…his shirt. Up and down my back, over my hips, down my thighs, up my inner thighs, dangerously close to the territory friends did not enter, across my stomach, and around my ribs.
He was awake.
I twisted my neck to look at him and was met by his dark blue eyes shining back at me. The bags under his eyes had faded, the redness almost gone.
“Good morning.” I bit my lip to hide my smile. His hair was a mess, worse than it was last night, but he had some colour back in his cheeks and didn’t appear as drained.
“Hi, friend.” He gave me a lazy half smile.
“Still going with that name, are you?”
“Of course. We’re friends.” He wiggled beneath me and closed his eyes. Getting comfortable again, he adjusted his hold on me so both hands were clasped behind my back.
“Friends don’t get this close.”
“Friends who snuggle do. We’re friends who snuggle.” His voice was tired and thick with sleep, so I didn’t say anything else. He needed to rest.
We didn’t snuggle. It was so much more than snuggling.
As much as I didn’t want to move, I had a lot of studying to do. So, once Nate had fallen asleep again, I reluctantly unwrapped my body from his and moved to the floor. I immediately missed the warmth of his skin against mine. Sticking the tip of my pen in my mouth, I chewed on it as I contemplated getting back in bed and “snuggling,” as Nate put it.
Common sense prevailed, and I turned away from the bed and attempted to concentrate on what I was reading. But it
was useless. I couldn’t stop myself from sneaking glances at Nate every few seconds. He was beautiful when he slept. So peaceful. Innocent. Not a worry in the world. It was when he woke up fully that I feared. I just hoped the night’s sleep he had was enough to get him back to normal.
My bedroom door opened, and I whipped my head around to see who it was. Uncle Johnny and Aunt Julie always knocked, so I knew it wouldn’t be them.
“Hey,” Kenzie greeted when she stepped into the room before stopping short, her mouth hanging open and her eyes wide.
“It’s not what it looks like.” I raised my hands in defence.
“It looks like Nate is sleeping half naked in your bed.” She crept over to the bed and tilted her head as she inspected him.
“Okay. It is what it looks like. Sort of. He’s sleeping. Nothing else. That’s all that happened.” I didn’t know why I was explaining myself to her. Maybe because she’d likely ask a trillion questions later. But I knew why I lied.
I couldn’t tell her that sometime through the night, I woke up to find Nate’s hand under my shirt, cupping my breast. And I couldn’t tell her that his hand drifted south. Just like I couldn’t tell her that he removed my underwear and his boxer shorts. I also couldn’t tell her that he set every nerve ending in my body alight with only a few touches, a few kisses, and a few strokes of his…
“How could you let nothing happen? Have you had a look at this man?” She waved her hands over his body and interrupted my memories of the night before.
Nate groaned and rolled onto his back.
“For the love of…look at that,” she huffed and pointed to his…hips? Abs? Crotch? I wasn’t sure. “How could you pass up an opportunity to lick that body?”
“Will you keep your voice down?” I tried to shush her and purposely ignored her previous question. Because I didn’t pass up any opportunity to lick that body. My lips were rather well acquainted with the fine specimen that was Nate. “He’s sleeping.”
“I can see that.” She stretched out her fingers and lowered them toward Nate.
“What are you doing? Stop.” I grabbed her hand and pulled it back before she could touch him.
“I just want to feel. See if it’s as hard as it looks.” She winked and yanked her hand out of mine, slowly lowering it until she hovered just over his shorts.
