Take care,
Peter
Tessa impatiently brushed tears away as she read Peter’s email over a second time. She knew it wasn’t his fault, of course, knew that he’d be flying home tonight as scheduled if things were up to him. But this news was the absolute last thing she needed after the truly awful day she’d had, and the urge to break down and weep – or curl up in a little ball – was becoming very hard to resist.
She’d woken up early this morning after a restless night to find that her period had started. Her cycles were always difficult, due in large part to the IUD device she used for birth control. She’d been cautioned by the nurse at the free clinic about the various side effects of the device – heavy bleeding, painful cramps, unpredictable cycles, headaches – but had opted to have the thing inserted anyway. She had developed severe allergies to three different brands of birth control pills – migraines, rashes, nausea – and had consulted with the clinic nurse for alternatives. The IUD had seemed the least complicated at the time, despite all of the unpleasant side effects.
Tessa hadn’t been in the least surprised to realize that today was a Wednesday, and as the day unfolded her misfortunes continued to pile up. The bus she’d caught to work had broken down, and by the time another one drove by it was packed with other riders and she’d had to squeeze herself in. She had been ten minutes late for work by then – though Kevin had still arrived a few minutes after she had – and while Andrew hadn’t chastised her, she knew he’d been displeased by her tardiness.
She’d spilled hot tea on her hand, causing a painful little blister to form. The assignment she was working on for another of the managers had baffled her, and she’d been forced to ask his very haughty PA several questions about the project. Tessa had been made to feel like an idiot after the condescending way the PA had spoken to her, but at least she had managed to complete the assignment after that.
After arriving in late, she hadn’t dared take more than a few minutes for her lunch break, and when she’d returned to her cubicle she had overheard Gina and Alicia making snide comments about her – more specifically, about what she was wearing today.
“I asked her where she bought that sweater, and she was actually naïve enough to admit it was from Ross Dress for Less,” Alicia had sniffed in disdain. “I wouldn’t dream of setting foot in a place like that, much less buying anything there.”
“Her tights have a bunch of little snags in them, too,” chimed in Gina. “And don’t get me started on those shoes. I’m surprised the heel hasn’t fallen off yet they’re so worn down.”
“That ugly sweater looks like it’s a size too small for her. But maybe she likes it that way, so that she can show off those big boobs. Ugh, it’s rather vulgar, don’t you think?”
Tessa had forced herself to bite her tongue, though it had been mighty tempting to let both of the gossipy bitches know that she’d heard every hurtful word out of their spiteful mouths. She’d given a little cough as she approached so that they were aware of her presence, and it had made her stomach churn a little in revolt as the two-faced cats smiled at her with almost sickening sweetness.
The rest of the work day had passed with relative calm, except for the fact that she felt awful from her period. The heavy bleeding made her feel lightheaded and chilled, and the painful cramps were nauseating. No matter how much herbal tea she sipped it did little to ease her distress, and for once she left the office on time, longing to curl up on the sofa, watch TV, and eat comfort food.
The bus, of course, was late and it had begun to rain hard, so that by the time she stumbled into her drafty apartment she was cold, exhausted, and hungry. She took a shower, hoping it would penetrate her chilled bones, but the tepid water and barely existent flow only made her feel colder. Tessa bundled into her warmest sweats, turned up the heat – though the ancient radiator didn’t do a whole lot to raise the temperature in the apartment – and heated up some leftover white cheddar macaroni and cheese.
She was beginning to feel a little bit better until she opened up her email and read the message from Peter. And what had already been a rotten day became that much worse, as she realized she would be alone for two or three more days.
Peter had been gone for weeks already, and she knew he would only be back home for barely a week before he had to leave on a new assignment. At least, she consoled herself, he would be in town for Thanksgiving – a week from tomorrow – and they had been invited to celebrate the holiday with one of Peter’s co-workers. But right now that was of precious little solace to Tessa, who’d been struggling mightily with loneliness and depression for days now, and there had been several occasions when she’d had to drag herself out of bed and go to the office. The urge to simply curl up in a little ball, pull the covers up over her head, and sleep the day away had been strong, and it terrified her that all the signs were beginning to point to her succumbing to the throes of depression.
She longed to discuss her situation with Peter, but knew that it would only worry him to realize how sad she was when he wasn’t around. And the last thing she wanted to do was give him cause for concern or make him feel guilty. Tessa reminded herself yet again how much her husband had sacrificed for her over the years, how he was finally getting the opportunity to live out his dream, and no matter what the cost to her might be she wasn’t going to spoil that for him.
She typed out a brief reply to his email, wishing him a safe flight home and assuring him that everything was fine – even though it really wasn’t. She brushed away tears impatiently, scolding herself for being a weepy, emotional basket case, and found a sitcom to watch that put her in a better mood for a short while.
There was half a pint of ice cream left in the freezer, but she shuddered at the thought of eating anything cold, and instead made herself a cup of herbal tea and dug out her “emergency” stash of chocolate. Her period was making her feel bloated and achy and downright miserable, but even half a bar of her favorite mint chocolate didn’t do a whole lot to make her feel better. Her breasts were swollen and tender, and she was more on edge than normal. The hormonal fluctuations she always experienced during her cycles seemed more intense than ever before, and Tessa somewhat ashamedly realized that she was – well, horny.
It had been longer than she could remember since the last time she and Peter had been together – weeks, maybe even months – and the experience had been as brief and unfulfilling as always for her. She wanted – needed – something she couldn’t even put into words, but just knew that her young, healthy body was practically screaming for physical contact, for affection, for release.
Tessa tossed and turned in her lonely bed as she struggled to fall asleep, gasping as the ultra-sensitive point of her nipple made contact with the mattress. Her hand drifted up to cup the heavy weight of her breast, her fingers plucking at the hardened peak in a desperate attempt to find some sort of relief. The pleasurable sensations rippled through her body until her other hand was cupping her sex. Her eyes were tightly shut as she rubbed a thumb over her clit through her nightgown, whimpering softly as her hips began to move in sync with her hand. She imagined a larger, masculine hand between her legs, stimulating her towards orgasm; pretended that it was his hand at her breast now, his thumb rasping over the nipple. And as she felt the orgasm begin to peak, she could almost picture his darkly handsome face in front of her, could practically hear his deep, arousing voice whispering words of passion in her ear.
Her eyes flew open as the pleasure took over her body, and she felt an almost instantaneous sense of relief as she came back down to earth. And even the guilty realization that the face and voice of the man she’d fantasized about belonged to Ian Gregson - and not her own husband - didn’t prevent her from finally falling into a deep and dreamless sleep.
Ian nodded at the various items that had been carefully arranged for his inspection. “Yes, all of these will do nicely, Mrs. Brennan. Excellent choices, as usual.”
Marlene Brennan gave her c
ustomer a satisfied smile. “I’m glad they all meet with your approval, Mr. Gregson. And I’m certain that your family members will love them, as well as appreciate the effort you made to select something special for all of them.”
Ian smiled back at the personal shopper who had helped him on several occasions to select gifts for his female relatives. “I couldn’t do it without your help. Now, you have the address in England to ship all these to, correct?”
“Yes, Mr. Gregson.” Marlene nodded. “We’ll have them all wrapped with holiday paper, and make sure they arrive well before Christmas. They’re all being sent to the one address?”
“Yes, to my parents’ home in Kent. Everyone in the family will be at their house at least once over the holidays, so it makes sense to just ship everything there.”
It was two days before Thanksgiving, and Ian knew that every department store in the city would become a madhouse within the next few days. He’d made sure, therefore, to schedule this appointment with Marlene in advance of the holiday rush so that he could select gifts for his mother, aunts, and sisters-in-law.
He had made Marlene’s acquaintance soon after moving to San Francisco when he had needed to buy a gift for his mother’s birthday. Neiman Marcus was the top luxury department store in the city, and Marlene had been recommended to him by a mutual acquaintance. She was a slim, well-groomed woman in her early fifties, and he appreciated both her efficiency and her professionalism. She didn’t fuss or gush, and had quickly learned his likes and dislikes. The array of items she’d produced today – including a Hermes scarf for his Aunt Helen; a Prada handbag for his sister-in-law Victoria; a pair of diamond and ruby earrings for his mother – were all tasteful and refined, and he knew that the gifts would be well received by each of his family members.
After settling the bill for his purchases, Ian made his way towards the elevator at a leisurely pace. Things were relatively slow at work this week, with more than half of the staff taking some time off for the holiday. He of course didn’t really celebrate Thanksgiving since it was very much an American holiday, but he’d nonetheless accepted an invitation to dinner at the home of friends here in the city. It would be a pleasant way to fill the otherwise lonely hours of his bachelor existence. And, fortunately, these particular friends were not the sort who would ever attempt to fix him up with someone, unlike other well-meaning but irritating acquaintances in his social circle.
His last couple of dates had been as equally unsatisfactory as the previous ones, and Ian had temporarily sworn off on any future such engagements. He felt guilty about giving his dates any false hopes that the evening would actually develop into anything, or that he would feel the need to see them again. And perhaps if he gave himself a bit of a break, he wouldn’t feel so bloody frustrated about the fact that no one seemed to interest him even a bit, that they all paled badly when compared to – her.
As he passed through the dress department, Ian’s sharp eye landed on a beautiful garment of dove gray cashmere. He ran a finger over the long sleeve of the dress, appreciating the fine quality of the fabric. It would, he thought, look beautiful on Tessa’s tall, shapely figure, the soft wool hugging her curves without being too tight or revealing, while the color would flatter her ivory skin and golden hair. His imagination filled in the rest of the outfit – sexy gray stiletto pumps, sheer stockings, a strand of pearls around her throat. It would be an ensemble befitting of her beauty, an outfit that would shriek class and money, and no one would dare to laugh behind her back if she were to wear a dress like this.
His fists clenched in anger as he recalled overhearing those two nasty witches Gina and Alicia a few days ago. He knew they both tended to gossip a great deal, and as such he normally never paid them any attention. But even though her name wasn’t mentioned, it was very obvious that Tessa was the object of their derision, and he’d found himself listening rather unwillingly to the nasty, unpleasant things being said.
“Her hair color can’t possibly be natural,” Alicia had scoffed. “I don’t care what you say, Gina, she has to be bleaching it on a regular basis.”
“No, hard as it is to believe, she’s definitely a natural blonde,” Gina had insisted. “I’ve never even seen a glimpse of a dark root, and her hair would be fried if she bleached it that often. Besides, how could she afford to keep touching her color up all the time? You’ve seen for yourself how she brown bags it every day. And she takes the bus to work, for God’s sake. Who does that?
“Eew, not me,” Alicia had declared in distaste. “Everyone packed in like a sardine, pushing and shoving and probably sneezing on each other. And I heard her telling Kevin that she and her husband live in the south of Market area, so whatever bus she takes must really be filled with weirdos. Ugh, how do people live like that anyway?”
“Well, then, that settles it,” Gina had replied smugly. “She definitely can’t afford to dye her hair if they have to live in a place like that so she must be a natural blonde. She looks sort of Scandinavian to me, Swedish maybe, so that makes sense.”
Alicia had given a haughty little sniff. “Maybe. I’m still not a hundred percent convinced that color doesn’t come out of a bottle, though. I guess if she’s that poor, though, that those big boobs of her must be real. Anyone who buys their clothes in a place like Forever 21 isn’t going to shell out a few grand for implants.”
Gina had laughed. “Come on, just admit it. You’re jealous of her. Cheap clothes or not you can’t deny that she’s got great hair and a banging body. I’d kill to have those legs. And her boobs. And her eyes.”
“I am definitely not jealous of her,” Alicia had protested. “Why in the world would you even suggest that, Gina? She’s just a little nobody with awful taste in clothes, no education, no background. I never even give her a second thought.”
Gina had snickered. “Yeah, okay. Keep telling yourself that. But you were the one to bring up the subject of her hair color, don’t forget. And – oh, crap, look at the time. I need to finish getting these copies made or Andrew’s going to rip me a new one.”
Ian had continued walking down the hallway after that, not trusting himself to encounter one or both of the gossipy little bitches and be able to keep his simmering temper from boiling over. How dared they belittle his sweet, lovely Tessa, laugh about her behind her back, or speculate whether parts of her were real or artificial. She was a hundred times more beautiful than either of them, a hundred times more beautiful than any other woman he’d ever met. He for one didn’t give a damn what she wore or what store she’d purchased it at, because whatever she wore flattered that incredibly sensual body.
As his gaze switched to an equally stunning dress of a slinky red jersey, Ian longed to buy it for Tessa – along with half a dozen others – and have it delivered to her home anonymously. His heart ached a bit at the very thought of her living in a rundown section of town, or of having to bring her lunch to work every day to save money. If she was his, he thought again, he would pamper and indulge her as though she were the princess of a European monarchy. She would be dressed in beautiful, classy clothes like the red Donna Karan dress he was still studying, and no one – especially not those two jealous cats Gina and Alicia – would ever dare to mock her again.
Ian slowly released the sleeve of the red dress and continued walking toward the elevators. His path took him past the lingerie department, and here again his attention was caught and held – and once again it was his golden girl he was imagining in several of the items on display. Bras, panties, thongs, camisoles made of silk and lace and satin, in a wide array of colors – cream, blush pink, pale blue, lavender, black. His fingers brushed ever so lightly against a sexy La Perla bra of black lace, envisioning how it would look against Tessa’s smooth ivory skin, or how the shallow cups would barely contain the sumptuous swell of her breasts.
“May I help you with something, sir?”
The voice of the sales clerk was polite but also unmistakably interested, and Ian gave the pretty,
dark haired woman a brief shake of his head. “No, thank you,” he replied rather curtly before striding over to the bank of elevators at a brisk pace.
When he reached the ground floor, Ian steadfastly kept his attention straight in front of him, resisting the urge to glance sideways as he passed the ladies shoe department, or walked past the perfume counter, or glimpsed the jewelry cases from the corner of his eye. He’d wasted quite enough time this afternoon fantasizing about all of the things he would buy for Tessa if she was his, and had no desire to torment himself further. It wasn’t until he was comfortably ensconced in the back seat of his Town Car, and his chauffer Simon had pulled out into traffic, that he emitted a long, low sigh of frustration.
‘Christ, mate, you have got to get this situation under control immediately,’ he scolded himself. ‘You’re turning into some sort of pervert now, touching women’s underthings as though they were actually on her body. Remember that you’re a thirty-seven year old man, that you’re the bloody director of an entire region of luxury hotels, that you can have most any woman you fancy just by blinking an eye. Your obsession with this girl is damned unhealthy, and it’s going to drive you mad if you don’t get over it right away. She’s a married woman, and Tessa is never, ever going to belong to you. The sooner you accept that the sooner you can get on with the rest of your life.’
But Ian feared that no matter how many mental pep talks he gave himself, no matter how many other women he dated, or how much time eventually passed, that his fixation with his golden girl wasn’t going to go away anytime soon.
“I’m afraid that isn’t an acceptable choice. You’ll need to have one of the others fill in while you’re on vacation.”
Andrew blinked a couple of times in surprise at the vehement tone in Ian’s voice. “I’m not sure I understand, Mr. Gregson. I would have thought you’d be pleased at the idea of Tessa filling in at my desk. She’s the hardest worker among the team, sir, and she’s doing all of the spreadsheets now along with several other reports. I just assumed - “
Covet (Splendor Book 1) Page 21
