“He’s a troubled child,” Mrs. McKenzie said, though it sounded more like he’s trouble. Mia frowned. “My husband is in the car. We’ll get out of your hair. Come along, Damien, I think you’ve caused quite enough drama for one night.”
Damien clenched his fists for a moment before shuffling out into the night air. Dread was an open wound inside him. He looked back at Mia as Mrs. McKenzie grabbed his arm, pulling him along as she apologized again. Mia’s expression was as cold as stone.
He looked away, keeping his eyes down for the green mile up to the rumbling car. The headlights blinded him for a second as they crossed in front of it and Damien’s breath stuttered, overwhelmed.
He couldn’t, he just couldn’t—
He climbed into the back of the car. It was warm inside, stuffy, smelling of Mr. McKenzie who turned around with a piercing glower. As soon as Mrs. McKenzie shut the door she twisted, pointing a finger at him.
“What the hell were you thinking? Running away…making us get you in the middle of the night. As if we don’t have to deal with enough of your nonsense on a daily basis. You just wait until we get home,” she hissed. Damien shrunk away, saying nothing. There was a pressure at the base of his throat, behind his eyes, filling his head, but nothing was coming out.
As the car was put into gear and turned around, Damien looked back one more time. Mia’s silhouette stood on the porch, still and dark, the last thing he saw before driving away.
CHAPTER TWO
Nicola had been his social worker for two years. She was pretty nice, even if Damien knew all her tricks. She had a tendency to speak quickly and cheerfully and would sometimes get stuff out of Damien with a persistent smile. She wore round glasses that she intermittently pushed up to her head, getting them caught in her ponytailed hair. The strands would pull out of the rubber band slightly every time she pushed the glasses back down, causing them to wobble over her head in a peculiar halo. She was thin, athletic, and could go on forever about netball. It made Damien smile. He liked when people talked about the things they loved.
Nicola was currently driving him around in her car, supposedly to find somewhere good to eat, even though they always ended up at a diner they both loved. Damien knew it was one of her tricks. She liked talking to him in the car so he wouldn’t feel pressured by her stare. He didn’t mind. Nicola’s car was familiar now. It was old and spluttery and he liked the noises it made, as if it were trying with all its might to get them to their destination.
“So…” Nicola started. Damien tensed, knowing that Nicola had been told about him running away and that she would want to talk about it. “How you doing, Damien? Has there been anything going on?”
“Not really,” Damien said, looking out the window.
“You sure? How’s it going with Barbara and Rob?” She asked. Damien shrugged. “ ’Cause they’re first time carers, so if there’s something in particular they’re doing that’s not so good we can talk about it and sort it out.”
Damien thought about opening his mouth and letting everything spill out. Telling her about the ropes, about the sick, bottomless feeling they caused inside his stomach. About the nightmares, how he would miss his mom and dad so much that thinking about them ate him up inside. Thought about telling her about school, how the teachers would shout at him, how the kids didn’t like him. Thought about how he wanted to disappear, wanted to just stop.
“I’m okay. Everything’s okay,” Damien said. There was a pause.
“You sure?”
“Yeah.”
“Okay. But…if there’s ever anything, Damien…I’m here to help, okay?”
“Okay,” he said quietly.
Some things were best left in the dark.
**********
Damien would see the Salgados around school. He recognized their dad, once, picking them up from school when Nadie had practice. He was a large, African American man with eyes that were soft and expressive. He’d smiled wide at Koko and Hakan, slinging his trunk arms around them as they tried to wriggle away.
He’d always been aware of Koko, being in the same year as her since he arrived at the school when the McKenzies took him in. All Damien knew of her was that she had a bit of a reputation for being a hard-ass. She didn’t go out of her way to put people down, but she could be waspish and defensive when she felt attacked.
Knowing now what Damien did about her, he wasn’t surprised. Keeping secrets, especially those made to protect you, change the way you see the world. They can make monsters out of shadows if you’re not careful.
Since the night of the forest, he’d caught her staring at him in class. Her wide eyes would be still and blank as they stared from her oval face. Her skin was lighter than her brother’s, matching her Native American mom, but her hair was a curly afro around her head. She had a strange, deer-like beauty to her, which was ironic given the circumstances.
He’d see Hakan and Nadie looking at him in the cafeteria sometimes, too. Hakan was two years older and was neither popular nor a loser like Damien. He had his father’s broadness and nose, but his hair was straight, cow-licked on his head as if he didn’t brush it. He was much less expressive than the rest of his family, his face the still surface of a frozen river.
Nadie was the only Salgado who could really be called popular. She was a cheerleader and top of her class. She was a year older than Hakan, and Damien barely ever saw her alone.
He tried not to think about what it would be like to be part of a family like that.
Damien was glaring at the piece of paper in front of him during history class, doodling moodily as everybody around him chose partners for the project the teacher had just explained. He wished teachers would simply choose partners for them instead of subjecting them to this routine of social humiliation. He tuned out the chatter as he waited for the teacher to notice he was too much of a loser to be willingly chosen and either force him to be the third wheel of a ready-made pair or lump him with whoever was sick today.
For the first time in years, however, neither of those things happened. All the warning he got was one of the girls hissing, “Koko, what are you doing?” before he looked up to see Koko Salgado standing beside his desk, arms crossed.
“Um…hi?” Damien said awkwardly. Koko rolled her eyes a little, although the look seemed more teasing than malicious.
“You wanna be partners, or what?” she asked, raising an eyebrow in a way that looked far too adult for her face. Damien gaped at her. For a wonderful moment, excitement shot through him. Had Mia told her about his interest in comic books? Was she taking this opportunity to get to know him? Did she want Damien to be her friend?
“Uh—yeah! That’d be, like, awesome,” Damien said, stopping himself from saying more.
It was the look she gave him then—unexcited, almost annoyed—that made Damien realize the only reason Koko could possibly have to be doing this was for insurance. She was making sure Damien kept quiet. Damien would bet his measly but precious comic book collection that Mia had put Koko up to this.
“Okay. You can come to mine tomorrow after school,” she said in a tone that was more order than suggestion.
Damien opened his mouth, hesitating. He’d never been invited to somebody else’s house whilst at the McKenzies’. He had no idea how they would react to the suggestion. On top of that, Damien wasn’t sure how he felt about going to the Salgado household. Mia had been so nice, had reminded him so much of his own mom, that having her see what he was really like and throwing him out—or worse, tying him up—would be crushing. The very thought of it had his heart racing and he realized he’d been gaping dumbly at Koko for way too long.
“Okay,” he choked out. Koko’s frown deepened, but she nodded as the teacher instructed them to settle down so she could explain more in depth about the project.
For a moment, Damien hoped Koko would sit next to him to discuss their options together, but she returned to her friends. A ball of dread settled low in his stomach, but for on
ce a shard of light shone through it. Damien could do this. He could go to the Salgados’ and make a good impression, prove to them and the McKenzies that he could be good. For once.
**********
Damien was freaking out.
The McKenzies had given Damien permission to go to Koko’s with a sigh and a long monologue about behaving. Damien had done little else but catastrophize since. He had to defrost his limbs one by one to walk towards the school exit as the final bell rang. He let the current of the student body take him outside mindlessly.
This was his chance to be someone else.
He walked slowly towards the mom car Nadie drove to school. The three siblings, Koko, Hakan, and Nadie, were already waiting for Damien beside the car. Koko and Hakan were dressed in their usual monochromatic clothes, but Nadie was the complete opposite. Her style was soft sweaters, flowery dresses, and colourful tights. They looked almost idyllic. Damien was so intimidated he had swung right around and was almost numb to their presence, although his rabbiting heart would suggest otherwise.
“There you are! We don’t have all day! Jeez,” Koko complained when she spotted Damien, who was dragging his feet.
“Koko, we’ve been here for like three minutes. Chill,” Nadie said, offering Damien a smile as she opened the driver’s seat door.
“Shotgun!” Koko shouted, lunging for the passenger door only to be yanked to a stop by her backpack.
“I don’t think so,” Hakan said, a slight smirk on his face.
“You guys suck,” Koko said, although her tone suggested this was routine. “Come on, then,” she directed at Damien as she got into the back seat.
Damien took a fortifying breath and followed, but it turned out that being stuck in an enclosed space with them wasn’t any less painful than seeing their easy banter out in the open. He tried not to be obvious as he watched them squabble. It was the first time in a while he’d seen family members interact with each other. Nadie seemed to be a tempering force to Koko’s quick temper, each as animated and verbose as the other. Hakan, on the other hand, stayed mostly silent.
Damien was so distracted by their interactions that it took him by surprise when the road they were on turned rocky as they were swallowed by the forest. Damien looked into the trees until they thinned out and the Salgado house appeared. The panic that had been suspicious in its absence hit Damien all at once as they parked. He clenched his teeth tight and turned away from the window to see three similar frowns directed his way.
“What,” he snapped irritably, tumbling out of the car before they could make him regret the slip more than he already did.
The house looked different in the sunlight. It was big, with three stories and an attic, painted a soft white and dotted with wide windows. A wraparound porch circled the house, large and slightly cluttered with toys and furniture. The whole structure was cradled by the encroaching trees on the land he was pretty sure belonged to them.
For a moment, Damien wondered what it would have been like to grow up there. To have had a simple, straightforward childhood—or as simple and straightforward as a werewolf’s childhood could be in a world dominated by humans. Damien walked closer tentatively, watching in amazement as the twins he had seen that first night came careening from the side of the house, squealing with laughter and covered in dirt. A moment later, a dishevelled man came after them, growling in a way that was playful but far from human.
Damien was suddenly struck with the memory of his own mom playing with him, jumping in puddles and getting soaked in the aftermath of a spring rain. He felt as if he were observing the scene before him from far away, his body becoming tight and small and distant and scared, but the moment only lasted a second before Koko knocked his shoulder with hers as she passed.
“What’s wrong with you?” Koko muttered angrily.
“What?” Damien asked dumbly, trying to catch his breath as Mia descended the front stairs and moved towards them.
“You stink like fear!” she accused, glaring. Even Nadie and Hakan were looking at him, frowns still on their faces. Damien hunched into himself, gripping the straps of his backpack.
“Koko,” Mia admonished sharply. Koko huffed and moved towards the house, which seemed to break the spell for her siblings as they followed. Mia let them go, remaining with Damien before signalling to follow her with a smile. He lagged after her towards the house, the dread growing until the moment he stepped through the front door.
The anxiety burst like a bubble without even a sound. Damien could not have imagined a better home. It was wide and airy, suffused with warmth. He trailed after Mia, looking at the rooms he had barely been able to process during the night he had been there.
A foyer greeted them as they stepped inside, though the room could more aptly be called a mud-room. It was littered with semi-neat lines of shoes, coats, and keys hanging from hooks that had personalized nameplates above them, from childishly scribbled names to stylish, bronze plaques. A wide hallway could take you either towards what looked like a vast library on the left, or the living room to the right, which Mia led him to.
That was the room he had waited in last time, but it looked even more amazing in the daytime. A humongous, round window dominated the longest wall. The window was panelled by several sheets of glass and the whole thing was framed by a brick edging. The actual room was large and filled with a massive, U-shaped couch, several armchairs, and a large collection of pillows and bean bags in one corner, away from the TV that dominated the far wall. Another door led them to the kitchen, equipped with enough counter and cupboard space to sustain a family of this size, as well as a large wooden table to seat them all. The room was light and bright, boasting wooden furniture and creamy walls.
Damien felt the fear drain away as he took in the bustling warmth, the light streaming through the windows, the voices and music that came at him from different directions. It might have seemed counterintuitive to be relaxed by such a boisterous atmosphere, but Damien felt something settle inside him. His chest loosened, hands regaining their feeling as his heartbeat slowed down. He breathed.
When he looked up at Mia, she was smiling. Damien found himself simply smiling back.
Koko was not yet appeased. He followed her huffing form into the kitchen, settling at the wooden dining table.
The study session that followed was both amazing and terrifying. Everything about the household seemed to sing to Damien as if their energies were on the same wavelength. There, his swinging legs and tendency to talk in bursts weren’t so out of place. With this much noise, he could hardly hear his thoughts.
Koko was more easily won over than she would probably like to believe. It took Damien mentioning a comic character that resembled the person they were doing the project on to make her start to melt. The defensive tilt to her body disappeared the more they talked. Before Damien knew it, they were laughing and bickering over the DC universe. Mia didn’t seem to really mind, leaving them to it for a while before turning them back to their homework with a smile on her face.
Damien couldn’t remember the last time he felt like that. Like he was being filled up with something crystalline. Even the odd moments of self-awareness, of suddenly feeling like an intruder in a kind land, couldn’t keep the smile off his face.
Damien tried not to feel too disappointed when Koko declared she couldn’t do any more homework. He got up from the chair, wondering if the McKenzies would pick him up or if the Salgados would take him home.
“Um, hello?” Koko’s voice snapped him out of the trance he had been put in as he started clearing the table. He looked up only to see Koko flap a hand at him to follow as she moved towards the living room.
He couldn’t breathe for a moment.
He followed her slowly. He was instantly distracted by the sight of the trees through the large, round window, but jumped as the twins suddenly latched onto each of his legs. He looked down and saw that one was a boy and the other a girl. They both looked like frizzy-haired cheru
bs sent from a mischievous version of heaven. The girl had paint over the dark skin of her face, apple-cheeked with a wide smile.
“Play Legos with us!” she demanded.
“Uh…okay,” Damien said. The girl cheered loudly and pulled him towards a corner filled with toys. She immediately up-ended a barrel of Legos on the floor. Damien gaped. He was amazed they were allowed to do that in the living room, but nobody stopped her.
Damien tried to follow their disorganized conversation as they played. He found out they were four, were called Lallo and Diana respectively, although the latter was almost exclusively referred to as “Dee.” It surprised Damien how different they were from each other. From afar, they seemed to have the same high level of enthusiasm and energy. When observed more closely, however, Damien could clearly see how Lallo would more easily play alone and quietly, concentrating for long periods of times on one set of toys. Despite it being obvious that he couldn’t understand everything that was going on around him, he seemed to like simply observing other people with his wide, dark eyes, making Damien wonder what was going on inside that round little head of his.
Dee, on the other hand, seemed to have a gravitational pull of her own, a bright spark of movement and laughter that even her twin brother seemed to get caught up in. The combination could have been catastrophic, but Damien would bet they would feed off each other as they grew up and learn perspectives that would have taken just one of them far longer to acquire.
They seemed to be in a world of their own a lot of the time, but it was a welcoming one—or at least Damien seemed to fit in. Before he knew it, he was sinking into a beanbag in the pillow corner, reading out a story that he would have thought was a bit advanced for their age, but they were swallowing it up.
In This Iron Ground (Natural Magic) Page 3
