At hearing Mom’s voice, Jemma came bounding for the door. She leaped at our mother, landing in her arms and getting wrapped up into a hug.
The fallout was going to be massive when she decided to leave again.
When she decided she didn’t want to be a mother once more.
I looked at Dad for some help, somebody reasonable to say Jemma couldn’t go. Any time those two spent together would just hurt the little girl so much more when the time came.
And it would.
Our mother hadn’t proven anything to me yet.
Dad just stood beside me, placing an arm around my shoulder. “I hope you have a good time at the movies. Try not to stay out too late.”
“Dad, it’s vacation time. I can stay up all night,” Jemma insisted. Mom had placed her back on the floor and they were holding hands. Just that simple act made me so angry I wanted to scream.
“We’ll be home after the movie,” Mom said. “Or maybe after we get ice cream. We’ll see how we go.”
“Have fun,” Dad said as he watched them go and then closed the door. I heard Mom’s vehicle start up a few minutes later and then it was too late to stop them. Dad leaned against the door and looked at me. “She’s your mother, Mel. Jemma is really enjoying getting to know her.”
“Jemma is just being set up for heartbreak. She is going to be an inconsolable mess when Mom leaves again.”
“She’s serious about sticking around.”
“How can you be so sure? She has a history of this, Dad. She takes off when she’s sick of us.”
“I’ve been meeting with her,” Dad said and it felt like a dark confession, like he knew he was doing the wrong thing. The one act that would feel like a betrayal. “We’ve spoken long and hard about her return. She was sick the first time, Mel. She’s better now, she’s over all that and she got help just so she could come back and get to know you girls.”
“Until the next time, Dad.”
“There won’t be a next time.”
“I don’t believe her.”
Dad wiped at his forehead as if the conversation was giving him a headache and he was trying to relieve the tension. “Do you really think I would have allowed her to speak with either of you if I thought she hadn’t changed? I love you girls more than anything, I would not let anyone hurt you.”
I had opened my mouth to argue but his words silenced me. Dad did love us, I knew that unequivocally. He was with us through everything, trying to raise two small children and suffer the heartbreak of losing his wife. He’d done it all alone and he’d done it all marvelously.
All the fight left me, leaving me deflated. “I’m just scared of everyone getting hurt again,” I said quietly.
Dad left the safety of the door and swept me up into a hug. He kissed my forehead. “I am too. But just think how wonderful it will be to have your mother back again. If we can get over the fear and let her in, she can only add to our lives.”
I tried to imagine what it would be like to have two parents again. I pictured Dallas and her mother, the way their close relationship had always made me jealous. I doubted whether we could have that same level of closeness, but perhaps we could have some version of it.
It would be nice to have a female parent to talk to about some stuff. As I got older, I had more and more questions that I didn’t want to talk to Dad about. Nothing against him, I just didn’t think he would want to talk about my monthly caller or anything like that.
Dad and I sat down with a cup of tea and really talked about Mom after that. He told me stories about how excited she was when I was born and how she would take me out on walks around town just to show me off. “She’d tell everyone you were already a genius, said she could tell. We didn’t have much money so she would make most of your clothes. You were the best dressed baby in the world and it was all because of the hours she spent on the sewing machine while you were asleep next to her.”
It was stories like that which started to melt the wall I’d built around myself. I never thought I’d actually start to consider being nice to her and give her a chance to prove herself.
Maybe I needed to let her in.
Maybe it was time.
Every time you loved someone, it was a risk. Only those you loved could hurt you the most. I’d taken that risk with Cole and he had given me so much happiness that I couldn’t describe it. Sure, he could hurt me at any time with just a few simple words too. But the risk was worth it.
I waited up for Jemma to come home. Our mother walked her to the front door and I took it from there. I helped the girl into her pajamas and tucked her into bed.
“Did you have a nice time tonight?” I asked as I sat on the edge of her pink bed. She looked tired, there was no doubt she would have a good sleep tonight. At least she didn’t have to get up early and go to school in the morning.
“The movie was so funny.”
“What about Mom? Did you enjoy spending time with her?”
“She bought me an ice cream and popcorn. She was really nice to me,” Jemma said excitedly. Even through her fatigue, she could still summon up happy energy.
“That’s good. I’m glad you enjoyed yourself.”
“Why don’t you like her?” she asked me quietly, as if I might get angry at her for asking.
How did I explain such complicated emotions to my little sister? I couldn’t fully understand them, there wasn’t a way for me to completely put them into words.
It was too late at night to come up with anything eloquent. “It’s not that I don’t like her, I’m just scared she’ll disappear again. I don’t want her to hurt you or Dad or me.”
“Will she leave again?”
“I really don’t know.” I pulled the sheet up to her chin and gave her a kiss on the forehead. “Just try to be careful, okay? You can still enjoy being with her, just don’t get too attached.”
“Okay, Melly.”
“Goodnight.”
Her eyes were already closed by the time I turned off the light. I regretted saying anything to her about Mom but she had to know something. I didn’t want her thinking I didn’t like her. That wasn’t the truth, but it was close.
I went to bed myself, thinking about everything that had happened that day. I’d gone from being excited about going to Hawaii to the anger of seeing my mother, to then understanding more about her from my father.
It was a whirlwind inside my mind.
All I knew was that I was going to be getting away from it all for a while. And that I needed to give my mother a break, for everyone’s sake. I couldn’t tear apart my family like she did. I wouldn’t be that person.
In the morning, I was awoken by my phone going off with messages. Cole had sent through all the details of our travels so I could pass them onto Dad. I had about two hours to get to the airport where I would be meeting Cole. He’d fly in just so we could catch the same plane to Hawaii.
We weren’t flying in the private jet this time, it was busy with official duties. Still, the airplane ticket he sent through was for first class seats.
Cole Newton spoiled me.
The two hours flew past so quickly I was running late to the airport. I’d said all my goodbyes back home before the car picked me up so there was nothing more to do than hurry to find Cole.
I flashed my tickets at the barrier and hurried through to the boarding area. Cole was in the first class lounge, sitting in the corner and facing out onto the tarmac to minimize the chance of being recognized.
But I could recognize him anywhere.
I hurried over and tapped him on the shoulder. His head snapped around and he smiled when he saw me. “I have been waiting forever for you.”
His arms were open for me and I ran into them. Cole’s hugs were so warm and wonderful I could have stayed in them forever. If there was ever a place on earth that was my favorite, it was in his arms.
“Sorry I’m late,” I said when we’d released our hug-hold on one another.
“I would
never let the plane take off without you. But we really should get on it.”
We boarded together, hand in hand. I couldn’t believe I was going to get him to myself for a whole week. No other band members, no manager, no family. It was just Cole and me, enjoying our alone time in paradise.
What could possibly go wrong?
Chapter Three
Somebody had tipped off the media. They were there when we landed and when we left the airport. The whole time we moved it was to the soundtrack of camera shutters and people calling out Cole’s name.
We had to get through them with the help of airport security to reach our car. They were crazy with the way they didn’t care if we were hurt or couldn’t move. How many pictures did they need, anyway? By the time we left they had to have had thousands of them. All of us waiting for our luggage and then getting into the car.
How exciting.
I tried to shake off the rocky start as we drove to the hotel. I thought the paparazzi couldn’t have followed us there. After all, the airport was a public place, but surely they couldn’t know where we were staying?
I was wrong.
Another set of photographers were waiting at the hotel. The driver had to move extra slowly to get through them. Thankfully, the hotel security had kept them out of the foyer so we were alone again once we were inside.
Our hotel room was amazing. It was a little bungalow set apart from the rest of the hotel. There were only about a dozen of them and we were fortunate enough to snag one.
All the windows of the bungalow faced the ocean as if we were surrounded by it. The water was crystal blue and looked as peaceful as a dove out there. The air was warm, making it even more inviting to go out and bask in the beauty of the island.
“Can we go swimming?” I asked.
Cole came to stand beside me, rubbing my back with his hand in the way I loved. “Of course we can. It looks amazing out there. Let’s change and go straight away.”
I changed in the bathroom quickly, so eager to see the beaches I’d seen in photographs for so long. They were calling to me, beckoning me to hurry up and soak up the paradise.
We left the hotel room and made a beeline for the beach. Cole was wearing board shorts, his chest gloriously bare for the world to see. I wanted to snuggled into that chest, but that could wait.
Right now, we had to swim.
The white sand of the beach was soft under my feet. The tiny grains slipped between my toes. We dropped our towels under an umbrella and kept going. The sand grew harder as we approached the water. It was just as beautiful up close.
The water was warm as it sloshed around my feet. There was no need to hesitate at the edge, I ran for the waves as the water climbed higher. My knees were wet, and then my hips, waist, chest, and then I was neck deep in the amazing water.
Cole stayed with me as we splashed and swam, playing in the aqua water like we didn’t have a care in the world. There was absolutely nothing that could have spoiled our fun while we played in the waves. The rest of the world was placed on hold for the entire duration of our time at the beach.
When we were tired and ready to relax, we retreated to the umbrella. We stretched out our towels on the warm sand and laid down. The sun was hanging high in the sky and drying the salty water from our skin.
I got Cole to help me reapply my sunscreen. He rubbed the lotion over my back, giving me a relaxing back massage in the process. “Hmm. You can rub my back any time.”
“You like it?” Cole asked. I could hear the smile in his voice without having to see it.
“I do. Anytime you want me to do something, just promise me a back rub and I will do it.”
“I’ll have to remember that.”
We spent the rest of the afternoon relaxing on the beach. Sometimes we ran for the water again, but we’d always come back to our towels and dry off under the sun.
It was paradise.
Our paradise.
Until the paparazzi found us. It was the click of their cameras that gave them away. Their shutters were too noisy against the gentle rush of the waves and the birds chirping overhead. It was easy to spot them hiding in the bushes.
Cole tried to angle the large umbrella to block their view from us but they just moved to get a better shot. We were exposed on the beach, unable to hide from their imposing lenses.
The beach didn’t seem as fun after that. All I could think about were the cameras and the pictures being splashed across the magazines and internet. The whole world would be able to see me in my bikini and I wasn’t comfortable with that.
Since the Major Music Awards, I had been in the spotlight just as much as Cole and the band were. The media kept debating my choice of dress, trying to decide if I did the right thing wearing a Walmart dress to the big event. I didn’t need their affirmation, I knew I did the right thing.
If Leyla Fast agreed with me, that was all the confirmation I needed.
Considering the media were so wrapped up in what I was wearing, they would probably pick my bikini apart – which also, coincidently, came from Walmart.
“I think we should go,” I said, not wanting to break the spell but unable to enjoy our surroundings anymore.
Cole sat up with a sad look on his face. “We’ll go then. I’m sorry about all these cameras.”
“It’s not your fault.”
“I know, but we can’t ignore the fact they wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for me.”
“Still not your fault,” I assured him. I had known what I was getting into when I first started dating Cole. I knew he came with special problems of being a celebrity and I’d accepted that. It was stupid now to blame him for our special problems.
We packed up our things quickly and went back to the room. We ordered room service for dinner and ate out on the back deck as the sun went down.
I fell asleep in his arms later on and I stayed that way all night.
In the morning, Cole was already up and dressed before I awoke. He looked like a dream as I opened my eyes and blinked a few times to make sure what I was seeing wasn’t just a dream.
“Good morning,” he said, grinning. “We have an awesome day ahead of us. Breakfast should be here in a minute, would you like to join me?”
I sat up and rubbed my eyes. “I would love that. Just give me a minute to wake up, okay?”
He hurried over to the bed to give me a kiss. “You’ve got one minute.”
I grabbed some clothes and dragged myself into the bathroom to shower and dress. The hot water always helped to wake me up. I was excited about this awesome day Cole promised me so it was easy to get ready quickly.
We ate fruit on the outside deck. Cole kept checking his watch, making me nervous. “Are we on a strict schedule today?” I asked, unable to watch him for a moment longer.
“Just for the first thing. We need to be there by nine.”
I checked my own watch, we had half an hour. “I’m ready to leave whenever you are.”
Cole didn’t waste any time. We left our hotel room and headed for the main lobby. It was a ten-minute walk just getting there and Cole was nervous with each step. He was highly strung today and he normally wasn’t like that.
We had to meet a car outside at nine. Cole poked his head out the main door and spotted it. “Damn it, they’ve parked all the way down the drive. We’re going to have to walk to it.”
“Okay.”
It didn’t sound like much of a big deal, until we stepped outside. There was a hoard of paparazzi and fans at the end of the drive. They were a human barrier between us and the car we needed.
Cole held my hand as we approached. I felt like running in the opposite direction. “Just keep walking and get in the car as quickly as you can. Don’t say anything to them and you’ll be fine.”
It was still a wall of people, I wasn’t sure exactly how I was supposed to get through them. But it wasn’t my first time for encountering something like this, either. I could do it, they would part for me eventuall
y.
Cole went first, striding confidently to them and just daring them not to move for him. They did, the crowd parting like the Red Sea. His grip on my hand was steadfast, there was no way we were going to lose one another in the crowd.
With the amount of people in such a small space around us, the heat was unbearable. All of us were fighting for the same oxygen, squeezing together like there wasn’t enough room in the world for all of us.
I focused on Cole’s hand as he went before me, making them move so we could get to the car. That was the only way I could keep the air in my lungs and not run out of breath. If I thought about it too much, it was overwhelming.
We were right in the thick of things when a leg shot out quickly. I had no warning and no chance to stop. I tripped over the leg and started to fall to the ground. All to the sound of people calling our names and cameras’ clicking with a copious amount of pictures being taken.
Cole realized I was falling when I tugged on his hand. He quickly turned around and caught me just before my face planted firmly on the ground. He stabilized me and helped me to stand on my own two feet again.
“Are you alright?” he asked. At least, I thought that was what he said. It was too noisy to really hear. I nodded in response and we kept walking – this time, side by side.
Cole shoved me into the car first when we finally reached it. He slammed the door and stood in front of it – on the outside. Was he crazy?
I opened the window a smidge so I could hear what he was saying to everyone. “Thank you for coming out today to see us. I appreciate the fans who took the time. However, this is my vacation. I’m here with my girlfriend to have some quiet time together. We rarely get to see each other so this time is really precious to us. Please respect our privacy and let us have this vacation. I plead with you to keep your distance.”
He ducked into the car and slid in beside me. The driver was given the okay to leave. “Do you think that will work?” I asked, curious. His fans were intense, and the paparazzi even more so. I doubted they would listen to anything.
Cole shook his head. “Probably not. But I had to say something. They tripped you over, Mel. I can’t have them doing that just to get better pictures.”
Star Crossed Collection Page 10
