by Jace, Alex
“I wasn’t finished,” Arjen said, still in that deadly voice. “You are pitiful, Tyler. You are worthless. Everyone can see that you’re nothing, that you use threats to cover up that cringing place inside you where you keep your fear. You’ll never be worth anything. And in a few years when I’m still happy with Max, I won’t remember your name.” Tyler was rapidly turning a dark red. Arjen faced him with all the icy sureness of a man with several generations of adoring family behind him. “I suggest you scuttle back to your hole before I call the police.”
“Nobody talks to me that way,” Tyler bit out. “I’ll come back. I’ll hurt you. I’ll—”
“Out. Now.”
They glared at each other. Tyler was taking sharp breaths, fists clenched. The colour was high in his face. He jerked his gaze away and stalked out.
Max could not believe his eyes. Nobody had ever stood up to his brother before. The relief as the front door slammed was intense and yet he could not relax; he feared the worst was yet to come.
Arjen turned on him already storming. “Your family is appalling!”
Max flinched. He knew exactly how appalling his family was. Arjen had seen his true colours now: Arjen understood what type of man he was, what kind of background he came from. Max began to plead. “I can fix this. I can fix everything. I can do whatever you want. Please don’t leave me, I love you, I—”
“For Christ’s sake!” Arjen nearly snarled. Max wondered numbly if Arjen was about to hit him. Max was twice his size and yet Max could not even attempt to defend himself against this man. “How can you say that? What are you thinking? Have you not listened to a single word I’ve ever said?” Arjen was getting steadily louder. “Did you not hear me when I said I’d never let you go? What, do you think I was lying? What did I ever say to make you doubt me?”
Max shrank. “I don’t…”
“Let me spell this out for you again. In simple words this time.” Arjen prodded him in the chest with each sentence. Hard. “I’m in love with you, you idiot. I’m absolutely, totally, helplessly in love with you and I plan to spend the rest of my life with you. You need to get this through your thick skull, because you don’t seem to be listening to me. I want to marry you. And in my family we marry for life.”
It hit Max suddenly that Arjen was proposing to him. Max sputtered. “Are you—is that—”
“Just give me a sign and I will. I’ll give you a ring, I’ll do it by candlelight, the whole nine yards. I’ll marry you and I’ll keep you forever. But you’d better be sure, because I’m only asking you once.”
“I don’t… I…” Max swallowed hard, trying not to crack. “I’m—I’m not sure.” He forced out the word that mattered. “Yet. I’m not sure yet.”
Arjen reached up and took his face in his hands, looking at him in a way that killed Max a little bit with how intensely Max loved him. “Then I’ll wait. I’ll wait, Max. I’ll wait as long as it takes for you to be sure.”
“What if I’m never sure?” Max whispered.
Arjen melted Max immediately with his smile. Arjen really was adorable. “I think you will be. Some day.” Arjen took his hand, fingers twining through his. “Now come back to bed. I’m not finished with you.”
Max’s relief burst out of him. Thank God he was forgiven. He let Arjen lead him upstairs to bed by the hand, then Arjen took his time undressing him lovingly before Max slipped back into the reassuring warmth of their bed. “You’re not mad at me?” Max asked him, just checking.
“Of course not.” Arjen smiled up at him as he slid under the duvet to join him. “I said I’ll wait. For you to be sure. And I meant it.”
Arjen promptly slid down his body and licked his cock. Max caught his breath at the jolt of lust that hit him. He shifted under Arjen’s weight and his hands clenched into fists as he tried to hold still. Arjen licked him again, a hot swipe of his tongue, tantalising him with the promise of more.
Fuck it. Max took a firm grip on his hair. “Stop teasing and suck me.”
Arjen did not need persuading. He went down on Max immediately, engulfing Max in his hot mouth. It felt amazing; Max gasped for breath as he tried to resist that wicked tongue. Arjen made a contented hum in his throat as he plunged deep, then pulled off, the suction intense. Max groaned aloud, already close to the edge. Max took control, rocking into his mouth, controlling the depth and rhythm of his thrusts, but he could only stand it a minute before the urge to come got too fierce and he had to pull out.
“I could finish you off,” Arjen murmured against his thigh, the picture of temptation.
Max growled, but managed to resist. “Come here.” He got Arjen nice and slippery, and Arjen began to slowly, slowly ride his cock, clinging to him, stifling his whimpers against his shoulder. Arjen’s body squeezed him so tight it wasn’t fair, no man could hold back long. “I love you,” Arjen whispered to him, his voice cracking under the strain. “I can wait.”
They came together, shuddering, their shared pleasure intense.
Max lay awake in bed the night before his father’s funeral, Arjen asleep beside him. He was deciding the way he wanted to spend the rest of his life.
At seven Max got up, leaving Arjen sleeping trustingly in his bed. His arm lay outflung across the warm place where Max had been, fingers curled into his palm. There was no more beautiful sight.
Silence ruled the house. It was still dark outside, and when Max drew back one corner of a curtain, the muted inside light caught delicate feathers of frost etched into the window glass. A deep chill had set in overnight. Nothing stirred.
Max tried not to disturb his sleepy Arjen as he dressed, putting on the only suit he owned: black shirt, black jacket, black tie. His shoes gleamed, polished and shined the previous night by Arjen, who had been endlessly supportive and loving. Arjen had brought him cup after cup of coffee, kissed him and whispered to him, sneaked under his arm and laid his head on his shoulder. Max would never have coped without him.
Arjen had offered to come to the funeral, but Max had asked him not to. Max did not want these two worlds to collide for a single second. He could not risk his old family ruining what he had.
Arjen still slumbered on. Max reached out and gently smoothed the duvet that covered him. Arjen stirred sleepily at the dip of Max’s weight against the bed; his dark lashes fluttered against his cheekbones as he dreamed.
Max dipped his head to kiss his cheek. “I love you,” Max whispered against his warm skin. “I’ll come back.” He kissed Arjen’s fingertips as well, then uncurled his fingers to kiss his palm. A sudden surge of tenderness tightened his throat; he worried that no whispers, no kisses would convey the depth of his feelings.
“I’ll fix this,” Max promised him, running his fingers through his dark hair. “I’ll fix everything.”
Nothing. Max shut his eyes. Swallowed hard. Then got up and left his beloved behind.
His father’s funeral was held in a little stone church in a churchyard white with frost. Houses clustered around it with tiles shining in the sunlight. Threads of smoke curled up from chimneys into a pale sky. Max crunched through the frozen grass of the churchyard, hopped down onto the path and let himself into the back of the hall just as the funeral service was rising to a crescendo. The priest’s voice echoed and resounded through the deep cold silence.
Only a few dozen mourners had come to the service. Once the last shovelful of earth hit the coffin in the open grave, they started to leave in ones and twos.
Max did not linger in the crisp air at his father’s grave. He had nothing to say to the old man.
He went to the wake, quite sure that this would only take ten minutes. The moment he entered the crowded hall, Tyler threw his arm around his shoulders with a grin, ruffling his hair. “It’s great to see you, baby brother. I didn’t think you’d come. Hey, you should give a speech.” Tyler’s smirk got even bigger. He clearly thought that by forcing Max off guard like this he could reassert his old power.
Max stepped out e
asily from under his arm. “Yeah, I’ll give a speech.” Somebody poured him a drink, which Max accepted. He took a quick gulp.
“My father was an asshole,” Max announced to the gathering. Loudly.
Silence fell. Then the whispering started. Max raised his voice still further. “My father was the most fucked-up part of a truly fucked-up family. He was a disaster as a father and a disaster as a man. None of you are my real family. You just share my DNA. And I’m not going to see a single one of you ever again.”
He turned away from the crowd feeling a thousand times lighter. “Hey, Tyler,” Max said, and while his brother stared at him in surprise, Max sucker-punched him.
His fist hit his brother’s jaw with all the force of thirty-five years’ pent-up fury behind it. It felt fantastic. Tyler hit the floor and actually skidded. Max shook out his stinging hand with a broad grin. He couldn’t understand why he’d waited so many years for that.
Then Max downed his drink and walked out into the sunshine with a smile. He felt on top of the world. Finally free.
Max whistled all the way home. It was a perfect day. Stunning sunlight filtered through the trees overhead, casting a pale new light on everything. Frozen leaves crunched underfoot. A spectacular frost glittered on every surface. It was a day for new beginnings, new families.
Max turned into his street, where he lived with the most amazing man in the world, and his smile escaped all by itself. Arjen was waiting fidgeting outside in the cold, clearly worried about him.
Max caught him by the front of his coat and kissed him soundly. Kissed away his questions, his concern. Kissed him into breathless silence until Arjen was clinging to him helplessly. Then Max just leaned his forehead against his, so close he could feel the brush of their lashes together. “Marry me.” At the end, in this winter moment, it was so easy to say. “Marry me.”
“What?” Arjen sounded dazed with happiness. “I—what?”
Max was grinning like an idiot, so happy it burst out of him in words. “I’m crazy about you. I always have been. I’m so in love with you that it’s terrifying. You are perfect for me. And I get it now. You’re the one who’ll always keep me, you’ll be my family if I let you. You are my test of faith. Let’s get married.”
It was absolutely heart-melting to watch Arjen light up into pure joy. “Are you sure? You really want to—?”
“I’ve never been so sure in my life.”
Arjen was smiling up at him, his face alight. “When do you want to get married?”
“Right now. This second.”
“I don’t think that’s allowed.”
“As soon as possible,” Max amended. Max tugged him closer still, so that Arjen wound his arms around his neck and glowed up at him, all his. Max dipped his head and whispered in the last moment before they kissed, “Whenever you want.”
*
Alex Jace is a UK erotic romance writer.
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Falling
#1—LOSS OF CONTROL
#2—EDGE OF DANGER
#3—FEAR OF FALLING
#4—MOMENT OF TRUTH
#5—LEAP OF FAITH
#6—LIGHT OF DAWN
#7—DEPTH OF FEELING
#8—PROOF OF POSSESSION
#9—BATTLE OF WILLS
#10—DAY OF REST
#11—TEST OF FAITH
Jem & Carlton
#1—THE STRANGER
#2—THE MORNING AFTER
#3—PLAYING NICELY
#4—PUBLIC INDECENCY
#5—WAIT FOR IT
#6—COMING HOME
#7—NEVER LEAVE
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