by J. C. Wilder
The signature of a madman.
Horrified, she jerked from his touch, her breath coming in shallow pants. She risked a glance at the handsome face of the man who’d kissed her so completely. Shadowed eyes stared at her, his expression hard. A low, almost feral growl sounded from those perfectly sculpted lips.
Shocked, she dropped her gaze and stared hard at his throat.
One perfect kiss.
She couldn’t look at him, couldn’t risk finding revulsion and pity in those miraculous eyes. Panic set in, tearing at her composure. She darted to the left when the stranger reached for her again and jumped off the stage. Whispers broke behind her as she ran up the aisle and out of the coffeehouse, desperate to escape her imperfection.
Chapter Two
Avon, Colorado
“So what did you think of him?” Shai asked.
From the tone of her voice, Erihn knew her friend was smiling. “Who?” She shifted the phone into a more comfortable position.
Shai snorted. “You know darn good and well what I’m talking about. Fayne, the handsome rogue who kissed you right out of your shoes last night in front of two hundred complete strangers.”
“You’re exaggerating.”
“Am not! He marched right up there in front of everyone in that room and staked his claim.”
“Shai,” Erihn squeaked, her cheeks heated with embarrassment. “He did nothing of the sort. I think he liked my poem and was just… just…caught up in the moment.”
“Ha! If he’d been any more caught up in the moment, you’d have been stripped bare on stage and he’d have taken you then and there.”
She hunched her shoulder as her body heated with remembrance. “He was a bit intense…”
“The mistress of understatement,” Shai drawled. “You were lucky to escape with your panties intact, my dear.”
“Oh, please…”
“So, what are you going to do now?”
Erihn stifled a sigh of relief at the abrupt change of subject. “Well, I’m going to start organizing my research for the next book.”
“No, I didn’t mean that,” Shai interrupted. “I meant, what are you going to do about Fayne?”
She frowned. “What are you talking about? I don’t have to do anything about Fayne. I won’t be seeing him again.”
“Think so? I have a feeling he might make an appearance sooner than you think,” Shai answered in a singsong voice.
Erihn pulled the handset away from her ear and scowled at it before tucking it into her shoulder again. “What are you going on about? This friend of yours walked into The Brew House and, for some reason, possibly demon possession, he ventured forth across a crowded room and kissed me. What’s the big deal?”
“Sounds like Fayne’s slipping. This isn’t like him at all. He is rather well-known for his…um…technique. Are you telling me his kiss was no big deal?” Shai sounded doubtful.
“It was…okay.” Erihn squirmed.
“Not good enough, Erihn. Keep in mind that I know him. Not well, mind you, and certainly not in the biblical sense, but I’ve heard many stories about him and the word ‘okay’ was never mentioned. Spectacular or stupendous is more in line with his particular abilities, or so I’ve been told.”
“Well, maybe he was a little better than okay…”
“How much better?” Shai pounced.
Erihn shook her head, a smile curving her lips. As an inquisitor, Shai was like a cat with a mouse. Her victims either gave in or died from exhaustion. “Well, maybe he was a little better than just okay.”
“You’re so hopeless!” Shai sighed in exasperation. “On a scale of one to five, where one is mildly amused by his technique and five is wanting to throw him on the floor and nail him, where did Fayne’s kiss fall?”
“I don’t believe in kissing and telling,” she responded primly.
“You haven’t been properly kissed before.” Shai’s patience was nearing an end and the tension sounded in her voice. “Now, spill the beans or I’ll come to Avon and pour champagne down your throat until you admit it!”
“Okay, he was at least a four.” Exhausted, Erihn collapsed on the couch.
“Finally!” Shai yelled and Erihn winced, pulling the phone away from her tortured eardrum. Cautiously, she brought the phone back into place.
“Will you shut up? Val will hear you!”
“I don’t have to yell for that, he’s sitting right here.”
“What!” Erihn sat up sharply, mortification sending ribbons of heat directly to her cheeks. “Don’t you dare let him know—”
“She said he kisses like a bandit.” Shai wasn’t speaking into the receiver.
“No!” Erihn yelled as she heard Val’s throaty laughter. “Darn it, Shai!”
“He already figured it out.” She sounded smug. “He knew something was up when you ran out of The Brew House.”
“I’m going to kill you.” Erihn sagged against the couch and groaned. “I’ll never be able to look Val in the face again.”
“Darling, don’t be that way,” Shai purred. “Val adores you and he only wants what’s best for you. He’d never think about embarrassing you over this.”
“Unlike some people I know,” Erihn grumbled.
“I love you, Erihn, and I’m delighted Fayne has awakened the woman who was sleeping beneath those hideous clothes. Now, we just need to find you a nice man who’ll understand and love you.”
“Shai, I was never asleep.” Erihn lunged to her feet. “I was just—”
“Hiding. Erihn, hold on. I’m going to shoo Val from the room so we can have some frank girl talk.” She heard Shai pull away from the phone and say something to Val. He rumbled in response and then, a few seconds later, she heard the sound of a door closing. “I’m back. Now, admit it, darling, you’ve been hiding for the better part of the past eighteen years.”
“You don’t understand.” Pain twisted Erihn’s stomach. Her friends couldn’t understand what it was like to be at the mercy of a madman for days on end. While the physical damage had been excruciating, the mental damage that’d been inflicted was far more devastating and harder to heal.
“You’re right. I don’t know what it’s like to be raped. But I know how it is to be terrorized. I also know what it’s like to try to hide from the world. There comes a time when you have to put the darkness behind you and step into the light. I want you to step into the light, darling. It’s time.”
Tears stung Erihn’s eyes. “There are those of us who prefer the darkness and I’m one of them,” she said stiffly. “We don’t need to stand in the light when we’re better suited to the dark.”
“Bull-hockey.”
She pressed her lips together to control the trembling even as tears spilled over. She felt as if she were teetering on a precipice with two possible fates before her. One was to step back onto the safe and familiar ground, and the other was to leap into the unknown and see if she could fly. While a part of her wanted to step into the abyss, a larger part of her soul wanted to fall back to the solid earth and remain there, safe and secure.
Coward.
“Pish tosh! You’re the least cowardly person I know.”
Erihn started. She wasn’t even aware she’d spoken out loud. She walked over to the stereo, shoved a CD into the player and pushed the play button.
“Oh, Erihn, you don’t have to jump into anything,” Shai continued. “I want you to think about it. Think about getting out with people other than us, maybe dating a nice gentleman who’ll understand what you’ve been through.” Shai paused, sounding a bit unsure. “I only want you to be happy.”
“I know, Shai, I know. But I want you to understand that I am happy.” Erihn frowned as the opening strains of Mozart’s Requiem poured from the speakers. She pushed the power button again to silence the melancholy music.
“And lonely,” Shai interrupted. “You’re lonely, even if you won’t admit it to me. You and I both know it.”
Erihn gave a fain
t laugh. “How can I be lonely when my head is filled with strangers clamoring for me to write their stories?”
“That isn’t the same at all and you know it. You need interaction with other people. You’re alone far too much.” Shai sighed. “Erihn, I just want you to think about expanding your horizons a bit. After you finish this book maybe? Val and I can double date with you or something.”
She couldn’t prevent the bark of laughter that escaped her lips. Somehow, she couldn’t see Val sitting around, making guy talk with a reserved man of any type. “I don’t think so.”
“Well, think about it. I know a lot of very nice men…”
“Okay, conversation over. The last thing I need is a blind date,” Erihn interrupted. “Truly, Shai, I appreciate your concern. I’m not sure why one little kiss brought on this tangent of yours.”
“It wasn’t the kiss, Erihn, it was your response to it. You’ve never responded to a man like that,” Shai pointed out.
“You make it sound like droves of men have been turned from my door, and that isn’t the case at all. I haven’t had the opportunity to date. You know I’ve been busy.”
“For eighteen years?”
“Shai.”
“No one is that busy.”
“Shai!”
“Not even the Queen is that busy…”
“SHAI!”
“Please, just think about it while you’re working at Jennifer’s.”
“Oh, look, someone’s knocking at the door,” Erihn lied in frustration. “I think it’s the pizza guy.”
“Erihn, there’s no pizza place in the valley that’ll deliver all the way up the mountain,” Shai ground out.
“New place,” Erihn lied swiftly. “Gotta go, love ya!”
Wincing when she heard Shai’s growl of displeasure, she hit the disconnect button and sighed with relief. Blessed silence. Shai would get her later for hanging up like that. Erihn dropped the phone into the cradle. She felt like she’d spent fifteen rounds in the ring with a heavyweight.
Mentally and physically exhausted, she walked to the open French doors. The late afternoon air was warm and the scent of pine and the rattle of the aspen leaves were endearing and familiar. Surrounded by lush plants and a view that staggered the imagination, the hot tub beckoned.
A trill of anticipation ran through her. She stepped onto the deck and into the brilliant Colorado sunshine. She scanned the thick trees and dense undergrowth for any sign of movement.
No neighbors for miles around.
She was alone.
Really alone.
Smiling, Erihn walked to the hot tub and her snack, abandoned when the phone had rung. A tray loaded with a wineglass and two cellophane-wrapped plates sat on the ledge of the hot tub. One plate contained cheese cubes, chunks of summer sausage, Greek olives and pâté while the other contained a selection of pita triangles and crackers. A bottle of Kendall-Jackson Chardonnay sat beside the tray, condensation forming on the bottle.
Mac, darling man that he was, had left a welcoming note on the fridge inviting her to partake of the food he’d prepared for her. The only confusing part was that there was two of everything—two steaks marinating in fresh herbs, two prepared salads and two potatoes, scrubbed and ready for baking. Maybe he’d assumed she’d bring a friend?
This would be an excellent place for a lovers’ rendezvous. A beautiful house nestled in the mountains. No neighbors for miles to break the solitude. Perfect for two lovers wanting time away from the world.
For her, it was the flawless place to get some serious plotting and writing done. Her briefcase, filled with notebooks and research material, lay within easy reach of the tray. It was time to get to work.
She eyed the bubbling, steamy water. This new diversion had been added since she’d last visited and she’d never been in a hot tub in her life. She dipped her fingers into the crystal blue water. It wrapped around her hand like a lover’s caress, soothing her skin and urging her to partake of its delicious warmth.
Dizzy with anticipation, Erihn cast a wary glance around the deck and surrounding wilderness. Spying no movement, save that of the breeze in the trees, she reached for her cardigan and slid it off her shoulders. Tossing the bulky garment on the nearest chair, she unbuttoned her ivory cotton camp shirt. The sun was warm on her skin, bordering on decadent as she slid the shirt off her body, tossing it onto the sweater before reaching for her skirt. One button and a quick zipper later, she stepped out of the denim garment, letting it slide to a heap on the deck. Clad in serviceable white cotton panties and bra, she sidled to the steps leading into the hot tub.
Taking a deep breath, she squared her shoulders and shucked her underclothes in record time. Naked and feeling defenseless, she scrambled up the short steps into the warm oasis. She exhaled loudly when the water surrounded her, welcoming her into its embrace.
She settled into the seat nearest the tray with a groan of delight. Reaching over, she poured herself a glass of wine, the lovely golden color shimmering in the sunlight. Raising the glass in a silent toast, she took a sip of the nectar. This was heaven. No doubt about it, the first thing she’d do when she got home would be to purchase a hot tub. Maybe she could squeeze it onto her tiny porch if she got rid of the rack of neglected plants.
Warm water seduced her bare skin in silken waves and she stretched to turn off the jets. The only sounds were the birds and the rustle of leaves as she settled against the backrest to enjoy the view.
Jennifer’s house was perched high on Red Mountain on the edge of a jagged peak. Her land dropped away just beyond the deck, and Vail Valley lay below. The tiny ribbon of Interstate 70 looked insubstantial from this distance. The Eagle River bubbled through the valley to twine intimately with a small rural road on its journey from the mighty Colorado River.
Snow-capped mountain peaks pushed at the blinding blue sky and nary a cloud was in sight. Summer in the Rockies was as close to heaven as one could get here on earth.
She yawned. Soaking in the hot tub while watching the sunset was just the ticket for her hangover. That’s what she got for drinking too much champagne last night. Hopefully, her new friend Kendall-Jackson would take care of the rest of her headache. According to Vivian, the best cure for a hangover was a shot of the hair of the dog that bit you. And if there were anyone who’d know a good hangover cure, it would be Vivian.
Erihn was more than ready to enjoy her month of solitude before diving into her new book, and she loved coming out for her yearly visit. Several years ago, Jennifer extended an open invitation to use the house anytime she wished. Now, it had become a tradition that, with each new book, she came to stay while putting her thoughts in order.
A month of quiet was what she needed to organize her notes and plot out her book, and this year was no different. Her latest novel had been released almost two months ago, and Velvet Lover still hovered near the top of the bestseller lists. Her beloved little were-cats were a success.
Who would have thought the mythical were-cat—a man who turned into a panther at the full moon—would catch the hearts and fantasies of a million romance readers?
Then, there were his nocturnal proclivities…
Erihn cringed at the thought of the steamy love scenes she’d written. The graphic scenes had startled even her. Velvet Lover was a radical departure from her usual style and her readers were eating it up.
Most of them anyway.
She frowned. Someone out there didn’t like her were-cats and they weren’t very shy about telling her so. At first, the letters had been innocuous, commenting upon her talent before suggesting she return to writing about “normal” subjects. But, after the news release that a sequel called Velvet Rhapsody was in the works, the notes had taken a more sinister tone. The latest accused her of being a pervert and a poor moral influence on her readers.
In general, she discounted the letters. After all, it wasn’t as if the writer knew where she lived. All of the letters were sent to her editor and that mail
ing information was in the back of her books.
But a woman with her history couldn’t be too careful.
Erihn sank lower in the water until it reached her chin. She didn’t want to think about that. Unbidden, his name popped into her mind.
Richard Michael Chapman.
Despite the warmth of the water, she shivered. Darkness beckoned at the edge of her consciousness and she pushed it away. No way would she go back there, not now, not ever. The view was beautiful, the water was warm, the wine was crisp and it was time to concentrate on other things.
Maybe she should allow herself to think about last night’s adventures?
Unbidden, a smile curved her lips. Color scorched her cheeks as fragmented visions of the handsome Fayne danced through her mind. He was…something else. Meow! A giggle escaped her before she could prevent it. Startled, Erihn sat up and clamped a hand over her mouth. Look at her, acting like a giddy schoolgirl! She was thirty-five years old, too old for a handsome rogue to set her mind to flight.
It’d never happened with anyone else.
Her hand dropped to the water with a slap. That was true. When she was kidnapped, she’d been a seventeen-year-old girl, too young and busy to date. After that, she’d never wanted a man near her, not that they’d come running. Not with a face like hers.
It was dark in the club last night…
But he’d touched her and traced her scar with his fingers. Unbidden, she raised her hand to follow the scar’s path down her cheek.
Maybe he didn’t care.
Erihn frowned and forced her hand away from her face. Men liked women who were beautiful, witty, and secure in their sexuality. She wasn’t any of those things, and she had enough emotional baggage for a fully loaded 747.
You can still dream.
Yes, that she could still do and do well. She could dream her life away. There were times when all she had were her secret dreams, the ones she never released into the light of day.
