by Gina Wilkins
“And I was one of the ones out playing while you were working,” he muttered. “Now you and the others who went straight through in school are settled into jobs and have the means to make plans for your future, and even take some time off occasionally.”
She understood a little what he was trying to say, so she didn’t bother to point out that this was the first weekend she had taken off in quite some time. She was still young, she still worked very hard, and she still had quite a way to go before she could consider herself secure and settled in her profession. But thinking of herself completely starting over again from early undergraduate studies was enough to make her almost shudder. Still…
“So what are you going to do if you quit?” she asked. “Will you continue to do maintenance work?”
“There’s nothing wrong with maintenance work,” he said defensively. “It’s an honest living.”
“And you do it very well,” she responded mildly. “I didn’t say there was anything wrong with your job—if it makes you feel fulfilled and content.”
His silence made her suspect that he couldn’t say either of those things. She remembered how happy his friend Bob seemed to be in his delivery job. Bob was doing exactly what he wanted to do, enjoying both his work and his life away from the job. Mike didn’t seem to have that same satisfaction, which bothered her a great deal, because she wanted him to be happy.
He seemed to become aware of the lengthening silence between them. “I can’t stay in this job indefinitely, of course. It doesn’t pay much more than rent and necessities. It seemed like a good idea at the time, since it gave me time to take classes, but I need to find something with more chance for advancement. Something that doesn’t require a master’s degree,” he added in a low voice.
She cocked her head, hearing more, perhaps, than he had intended to reveal in his words. “Was there something you were considering that does require a master’s degree?”
“I thought maybe— But it doesn’t matter. I’ve pretty much changed my mind.”
It wasn’t her business, she reminded herself. She shouldn’t press him to talk. But, darn it, it wasn’t as if they were just casual acquaintances. Surely they had progressed to a point where they could express genuine concern about each other. “What were you considering?”
He hesitated so long that she had begun to wonder if he was going to ignore her. Finally he said, “I thought about going into coaching and teaching at a middle school level. I mean, I like sports and kids, and my mom was a teacher for years, so I know what the job entails. But you really have to have a master’s degree to get a good job in education.”
“You would be a great teacher and coach,” she said, struck by the image.
“Like I said, I’ve pretty much changed my mind.”
“You’re sure you want to do that? If it’s just the time involved, you’re only twenty-eight. You’d still be quite young by the time you finished your training. You’d have years to work before retirement. Do you want to reach that age and regret that you didn’t pursue your dreams?”
“I never said it was my dream. It was just a passing thought. But really, Catherine, me as a teacher? Heck, I barely made it through high school, and pretty much flunked out of college the first time. It’s kind of a joke, when you think about it.”
“I’m not laughing,” she said.
He fell silent.
There were so many more things she wanted to say. So many arguments she could make about why he should persevere. But maybe she had reached the limit of how much she could meddle.
The flames in the fire bowl were dying down, and neither of them moved to put in more wood. The formerly comfortable, lazy air of companionship had been altered, leaving a subtle edge of tension between them. She regretted the change, and wondered if it was her fault.
“It’s getting kind of cold out here,” Mike said finally. “Ready to go in for hot chocolate?”
It was apparent that he didn’t want to talk about his plans anymore just then. Catherine nodded obligingly, pushing herself out of her chair. They went inside together. Mike locked the door while she moved into the kitchen to heat water for the packets of instant cocoa they had brought with them.
She had just stirred the mix into two mugs of steaming water when Mike slipped his arms around her from behind. “Will you still go out with me even if I don’t have a college degree?” he asked in her ear.
“You didn’t have a college degree when I started seeing you,” she replied matter-of-factly.
He chuckled. “You always have a candid answer for everything, don’t you?”
“I try. Too bad we forgot marshmallows. We could have had some on our hot chocolate.”
His voice was suddenly gruff as he turned her in his arms and lowered his head. “I don’t want marshmallows. I want you.”
“Then there’s no problem, is there?” she responded, lifting her arms around his neck. “I’m right here.”
Two mugs of cocoa grew cold on the counter, completely forgotten.
Chapter Fifteen
Catherine had mixed emotions when Mike turned into the parking lot of their apartment complex early Sunday evening. She was glad to be home, of course, and looking forward to seeing Norman again. And yet her weekend with Mike had been so nice, for the most part, that she almost regretted returning to their real lives and the problems that faced them.
And there were still problems. They could not keep avoiding their friends and his family. His indecision about what to do with his future was a bit of a sore point between them, one she felt compelled to discuss more intensely and which he had studiously avoided ever since their conversation by the fire last night.
“I’m sure Norman’s going to be glad to see you,” Mike said, turning off his truck engine.
“Are you kidding? He’ll give me the cold shoulder. I’ll have to grovel and apologize repeatedly, then give him double his usual salmon treats before he’ll even acknowledge my presence. And then, after he has decided I’m properly chastened for daring to leave him overnight, even though I left him plenty of food and water and fresh litter and kitty toys, he’ll deign to let me give him a tummy rub.”
Mike laughed. “Norman has a way of making his feelings known, doesn’t he?”
“Oh, yes. Norman communicates better than some people I know.”
Mike helped her out of the truck, then carried her bag for her, waiting close behind her as she unlocked the door to her apartment. “Do you think Norman would let me say hi to him?”
She opened the door with a smile. “You can try.”
Grinning, he accompanied her inside.
True to her prediction, Norman gave them one disdainful look, then sneered and pointedly turned his back to them, making Mike laugh again. “Oh, man, you are really going to have to crawl.”
“Tell me about it.” Smiling, she walked straight to the pantry for the salmon snacks.
Mike leaned a shoulder against a wall and watched as she coaxed Norman into a better mood. The cat was purring by the time she rose and went back into the kitchen to refill his food and water bowls. There was still a little dry kitty kibble in the food bowl, but she refilled it, anyway, just to keep him happy.
Hearing a sound behind her, she turned to see Mike standing in the doorway with Norman lying contently in his arms. “I apologized to him for taking you away for the weekend.”
“I see he’s forgiven you.”
“Provisionally.”
“You’re lucky he made it so easy for you. Can I get you anything?”
“No, I’m good. Thanks.” With a final pat to Norman’s head, he set the cat on the floor, then straightened.
Something about his expression caught Catherine’s attention. She sensed that he was about to say something momentous, and a moment later he proved her right. “Catherine, will you come with me to my parents’ house for Thanksgiving dinner?”
Startled, she said, “I, uh—what?”
“I know it’s r
eally short notice and maybe you already have other plans. We haven’t talked about Thanksgiving because I wasn’t sure how you would feel about me asking you. I know your first impression of my sisters wasn’t very positive, but they really are nicer than they acted that night. I had a pretty good talk with both of them after the Halloween party, and they both admitted they didn’t behave very well. I promise they’ll be nice to you Thursday or red heads will roll.”
While she was touched that he had asked, she had to shake her head. She would decide later whether she was relieved or disappointed that she had a legitimate reason to decline. “I’m sorry, Mike, but I’ve already told Karen I would join her dinner party for Thanksgiving. It would be rude to rescind my acceptance at this late date.”
He allowed his own disappointment to show on his face. “I’m sorry to hear that. I guess I should have risked asking you earlier.”
“I really do appreciate the invitation.”
“So Karen invited you to join her and Wayne for Thanksgiving?”
“Yes. She’s having a, um, few people over for the holiday.”
He must have noticed her slight hesitation. Or perhaps he read her expression a bit too well. “Who all will be there?”
She swallowed a sigh, suspecting he wasn’t going to like her answer. “Karen and Wayne, of course. Bonnie and Chris. And Bill James.”
Mike’s eyes narrowed. “Bill James?”
“His mother died recently, and he has no other family in this area. Karen didn’t want him to be alone for Thanksgiving.”
“So she set him up with you?”
“It isn’t a setup. She invited us both as friends and colleagues who had no other plans for the holiday. There’s nothing more to it.”
“Does he know that?”
“I’m sure he does,” she said, though she couldn’t speak with the certainty he might have liked.
“Look, can’t you get out of this? You could tell Karen that I’ve asked you to join my family for dinner. I’m sure she would understand.”
Catherine lifted an eyebrow. “You think she would understand if I told her I’d changed my mind about joining them because I received a last-minute invitation from someone else?”
“Not just anyone else,” he said defensively. “You and I are—well, you know.”
“We’re sleeping together. That doesn’t change my obligation to my friend.”
He didn’t like that. His shoulders stiffened. “That’s all this is between us? All it means to you?”
“I don’t know what it is, exactly. We’ve had a good time together, but we’ve never discussed anything more. We haven’t even known each other all that long, really.”
“I thought we had progressed beyond counting the days since we met,” he said stiffly.
“Mike, we haven’t even been able to share our regular lives with each other. Your sisters don’t approve of me for you, and you were bored half-senseless by my friends. It’s entirely too soon for us to start defining a relationship.”
“I’m sure Dr. Bill has much more in common with your friends.”
Catherine’s rare temper began to simmer. “Don’t even go there.”
“I can’t help noticing that you’ve started hedging about our relationship since I told you I was thinking about dropping out of college again.”
The simmer became a slow boil. “You are really starting to make me angry. I accepted this invitation days before I knew you were even considering not returning to school. You haven’t even mentioned Thanksgiving until today. So you have absolutely no right to be annoyed that I’ve made other plans.”
“You’re correct, of course. I have no rights at all where you’re concerned.”
“Look, we’ve had a very nice weekend together. Let’s not spoil it with a quarrel now.”
“No, we wouldn’t want to spoil anything, would we? Especially since we’re only sleeping together.”
She almost flinched. Instead, she lifted her chin and said, “Maybe we’re both just tired. Or maybe you’re under stress because you’re having trouble deciding what you want to do with your life. But you have no reason to take that stress out on me.”
“You know, maybe I should just take my tired, indecisive, stressed-out self out of your apartment before this turns ugly.”
As far as she was concerned, it had already turned ugly. “Maybe you should go for tonight,” she agreed. “We can talk again when we’ve both cooled off.”
“Right.” He turned on one heel to stalk toward the door. Throwing one last look back at her, he said, “Give my regards to all your doctor friends.”
“I’ll be sure and do that.”
But he wasn’t quite finished. “Is Dr. Bill picking you up here? Maybe I should be here when he arrives, just to say hello.”
One eyebrow rising, she responded in a chilly tone, “I don’t think there’s any chance of you running into him. That would involve you being somewhere on time for a change.”
He spun on one heel and let himself out, leaving Catherine to indulge in a very rare bout of angry tears, followed by a restless night wondering how a perfect weekend could descend into such a stupid, bitter argument.
Mike shoved a forkful of turkey and dressing into his mouth and tried very hard to be thankful for it. No doubt about it, his mom was a great cook.
He wondered if Catherine was enjoying the meal Karen had prepared for her and Dr. Bill.
His family surrounded him. His parents, four sisters, two brothers-in-law, four children and two boyfriends. So it made no sense at all that what he seemed to be feeling was lonely.
His mother and sisters chattered like magpies while the kids babbled and the men concentrated primarily on the food. If anyone had noticed that Mike was more subdued than usual, no one had commented as of yet.
Trust Laurie to bring up the one subject guaranteed to make his mood even darker. “I’m surprised you didn’t bring your professor friend today. I thought you and she were pretty much joined at the hip lately.”
“I told him he was welcome to bring a guest,” Alice said when he didn’t immediately respond. “I assume his friend had plans with her own family.”
“Something like that,” Mike muttered, jabbing his fork into a candied sweet potato.
“I would like to meet her,” Alice added. “She sounds like an interesting woman.”
“She seemed nice enough, once I spent a little time with her,” Charlie conceded with a wary glance at her brother. She hadn’t forgotten the heated conversation they’d had the day after the Halloween party. “She’s a little reserved—almost intimidating at first—but I guess that’s because she’s a scientist with such a serious job.”
Her boyfriend, Drew, gave her a look of approval that showed he, too, had given her some advice about Catherine.
“I think it’s great that Mike’s seeing a scientist,” Amy said loyally. “I always thought he needed more of a challenge than those party girls you and Laurie kept introducing him to.”
“Weren’t you the one who nagged him at Easter about settling down with some nice young woman and starting a family?” Laurie challenged in return. “I’m not sure Dr. Travis is interested in taking time out of her career to raise children.”
“And why would she have to choose one or the other?” Gretchen demanded. “I’m raising children and pursuing my career quite successfully, thank you.”
Mick spoke up before an all-too-familiar squabble broke out among the four outspoken and opinionated sisters. “Did you do something different to the green beans this year, Alice?” he asked loudly, holding up a forkful to study it. “They don’t taste quite the same as usual.”
“I brought the green beans, Dad,” Charlie—who cooked only when absolutely necessary—said. “I just seasoned them a little differently, that’s all. Cut out the fat.”
“They taste pretty good,” her father conceded. “I kind of miss the ham hock, though.”
His daughters immediately began to chide him
about eating a more healthy diet. Knowing exactly what had brought about that change of subject, Mike gave his father a grateful look that was returned with a wry smile.
Though she made a point of smiling and nodding, Catherine had no clue what was being said around her as she plowed determinedly through a Thanksgiving dinner she barely tasted. Everyone around her seemed to be in a festive spirit, which made her own somber mood even more difficult to hide.
“Isn’t that right, Catherine?” Bill asked from beside her.
She started. “I’m sorry. What did you say?”
The expressions around her told her she had not been doing as good a job as she had hoped of in pretending to be participating. Avoiding Karen’s too-perceptive gaze, she made more of an effort to pay attention.
She didn’t want to be ungracious. Already she was wondering if she should have canceled—not to accompany Mike, she assured herself, but to stay home alone with her cat and her bruised feelings.
She hadn’t heard from Mike since he had stormed out of her apartment. And she had missed him. She was still angry with him, still convinced that he had been a total jerk about her turning down his last-minute invitation to Thanksgiving dinner, but she missed him, anyway. Even more than she would have expected.
It was probably over between them. Mike would move on, going back to his more-fun friends. It was likely that he would find some young, adoring woman who wouldn’t ask him questions he didn’t want to answer, or challenge him to pursue dreams he seemed hesitant to acknowledge. Maybe his sister’s perky blond friend, she thought, trying very hard not to be catty. Knowing she failed.
As for herself, she had her work and her friends. Her cat. Her parents, who would be back in the country in only a few weeks. A good life.
Bill was making it plain that he was still open to seeing her, if she was interested. Wasn’t that what she had wished for only a few months earlier? Someone to share her life with? Someone who understood her work and her obligations, who had enough in common with her to form a solid, mutually supportive partnership.
