Taking my bag, I walk down the pavement back to my home and swing into a bakery. Staring at all the goodies in the glass case, I pick out two gorgeous cupcakes- a double chocolate for Madeleine and a Boston cream for me. Both look divine. I pay for my treats as the clerk wraps them up. Maddie will be over the moon when she finds out that Dev is taking us to dinner. I laugh to myself as I anticipate her reaction.
I walk up to my building and climb the steps. Moments later, I open the door to my apartment, only to find Madeleine still sound asleep on the sofa.
“Oh, dear God! Are you ever going to get up today?” I say loudly, startling my friend awake.
She rolls over quickly, glaring at me, before sitting up and scratching her head through the tangled mess of hair. “You’d be sleeping too if you had my night.”
“It would be pretty difficult to get a job if I slept all day after partying all night, don’t you think?”
“You don’t even need a job. I don’t know why you are so insistent on this point.”
“Because,” I say as I set the food on the small, white wooden dining table, “I don’t intend to live off my parents the rest of my life. I want my own career and my own money.”
“Pshhh, overrated.” Madeleine giggles and shuffles over to the table, plopping herself down in front of the bags. “Smells like chips.”
I watch as she peers inside one of the oil stained bags of food and pulls out a fry.
“Your place on campus wasn’t open so I brought this.”
“Mmm, perfect.” She shoves several more chips in her mouth then looks up at me. “Dessert, too?”
“Yes. It’s a celebration.”
“Did the interview go well, then?”
I wiggle my eyebrows and grin. “I think so. He hired me.”
“Seriously? Oh, Londyn, I’m so happy for you!”
Smiling, I reply. “Thanks. I’m pleased.”
“Absolutely! We need to do more than this lunch to celebrate.”
“We’re going to. Dev is taking us to dinner in the North End tonight.”
“Oh my God! Dev!” Madeleine pops up from her seat and runs her hands over her hair as though my brother just walked in the room. “Dinner with the Stunner! This day just keeps getting better and better.”
“Stunner?” I repeat, laughing.
“Oh, yes, Devon is truly worthy of the term!”
“I’m glad you’re happy.” I laugh at her dramatic display of excitement.
“So, tell me about the interview,” she says, settling back into her seat.
I sit down at the table and begin unwrapping my lunch, thinking back on my morning. “The professor is definitely intimidating. I actually thought I blew the whole thing because he had me so jumbled about. I must have said something right, though. I start Monday.” I take a bite of my sandwich, enjoying the sharp taste of the sauerkraut and the richness of the rye bread. It’s very good.
“He must have seen how wonderful and smart you are. I’m so happy for you.”
“Thanks, Maddie.”
We eat together whilst Madeleine fills me in on her escapades from the night before. It amazes me how she is so fearless and vibrant. She views life completely differently than I do. I see it as something you do. She sees it as something to conquer. Every day for Madeleine is a chance to push the boundaries and to experience new things. Me? I’d rather sit quietly with my thoughts and a cup of tea, gazing outside as life goes on around me. How I wish to be more like Madeleine. Even just a bit.
“What are you thinking about?” my friend asks as we finish lunch.
“Nothing much.” I smile. “Just hoping I have what it takes to be successful in this role.”
Madeleine reaches over and squeezes my hand. “You do. I just know it. Everything you’ve ever put your mind to, you’ve achieved. Even getting a job from this man. You’re going to be absolutely fabulous.”
“Thanks.”
“Now. Enough chitchat. Let’s discuss your wardrobe.”
“What about it?”
“You need new clothes for your new job.”
“I hate clothes shopping and you know it.”
“Yes, I do know it, but you need to feel confident and look professional. You’ve been a student for ages and it’s time to get yourself some smart outfits to wear. I’ll help you.”
The very thought of trying on clothes makes me cringe. I know I’ve put on weight these past few months, I just don’t know how much. I can’t deny that everything in my closet is getting tight. I hate to admit it, but Madeleine is right.
I sigh in defeat. “Alright.”
“Perfect! I’ll wash up a bit then we’ll go out. There are some wicked shops up on Newberry Street. We’ll have fun.”
“If you say so.”
“I say so.”
I watch Madeleine disappear down the hall as I finish my sandwich. The last thing I want to do today is shove my body into new clothes. I sigh heavily. I already know Madeleine will push me to clothes like she wears, which are far too flashy for my taste. I’ve always preferred to be conservative in my choices.
She reappears quickly, wearing a pair of white shorts and a black wrap top. Her style is so effortless. I envy her fashion sense. That and her incredible legs.
Sliding her feet into black sandals, she looks up at me with her toothy grin. “Shall I buy a new dress for dinner with Dev?”
“If you’d like to.”
“Maybe he would notice me.”
“Maybe.” I shrug my shoulders then stand and head back to my bedroom. I want to put something more comfortable on. I choose a pink linen skirt and a white blouse. It’ll do.
Standing in the foyer, Madeleine waits impatiently for me. When she sees me, she smiles. “You look great in pastels.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah. Let’s go.”
We head outside and grab a cab to take us on our shopping adventure.
Hours later, we finish shopping and begin to head home. Madeleine must have at least ten bags whilst I am pleased with my purchases that fill up three. I bought several skirts, a couple of dresses, a pair of trousers, even though I hate wearing them, and two pairs of shoes. I vowed to myself as I stuffed my body into numerous outfits in the fitting room that I would lose weight. Of course, I would have to go shopping again, but it should be less torturous than this outing was.
Walking up the steps to the brownstone where we live, Madeleine talks a mile a minute about Devon and our plans tonight. As boy crazy as the girl is, her heart has always been set on my brother since we were children.
“Do you think he’ll like the dress I bought?” Madeleine asks as she throws down her packages on our vibrant red chenille sofa.
“You look spectacular in it. I imagine most men would admire the dress.”
“But will Devon like it?” she asks again, whilst fluffing her hair.
“I believe he will, yes.” Kicking off my shoes, I shove her packages over and sit down. “He is a red-blooded male after all.”
“That he is!” Madeleine giggles and sits down on the cream armchair beside me. “I just want to look nice,” she adds, softly.
“You will. I hope he takes us to Strega. I love the lobster ravioli there.”
“Ooh, yes. The Carbonara there is totes amazeballs.”
I giggle at her response. You can take the girl out of Essex…
“I’m going to go freshen up.”
“Me, too.” Madeleine bounces out of her chair and heads to her bedroom. I swear that girl has more energy than she knows what to do with.
I FINISH THE RISOTTO just as I hear the buzz of my doorbell. Wiping my hands on my apron, I turn down my music on the way, and then open the door for my friends.
“Hey, hey, Luca,” Jake says, slapping me on the shoulder as he enters my foyer. His wife Priscilla walks in behind him, smiling, and hands me a bottle of wine.
“We didn’t know what we were having for dinner. Hope Pinot Grigio works,” she says.
“Perfectly.” I smile and accept the wine, gazing for a moment at the label. “We’re having grilled shrimp and Parmesan Risotto.”
“Mmm. I’m starving,” Priscilla says. “I always look forward to your meals.”
“I appreciate that,” I say, bowing slightly. “Come on in.”
“How was work today? Did you find an assistant yet?” Jakes asks as we make our way to the kitchen.
“I did. Hired a girl named Londyn.”
“Londyn?” Jakes asks as he leans against the counter.
“Yes.” I chuckle. “She’s actually from England and her parents named her after the place where they planted the seed.”
“Planted the seed?” Priscilla asks.
“Yes, to hear her tell it, they went on a vacation and got pregnant with her.”
“She told you that?” Priscilla asks. “Odd to discuss during an interview.”
“She did. Admittedly, I pushed her a bit.”
“Why doesn’t that surprise me?” Jake asks.
Laughing, I begin opening the wine. “She was very jumpy, but I think she’ll work out. She is very smart and determined. I could tell that about her right away.”
“Good,” Jake says. “Don’t send her home in tears the first day, huh?”
“I’ll do my best,” I say. “Shall we eat?”
“Please,” Priscilla says.
I finish the risotto by stirring just a bit of butter and mascarpone cheese into it, giving it a silky finish. I sprinkle some chopped Italian parsley on it and scoop a bit onto each dish. I add four large grilled prawns, then drizzle a bit of olive oil over the top, with just a squeeze of fresh lemon. Carrying the dishes to the table, I set each down, as Priscilla and Jake follow with our wine glasses. Entertaining feels good and gives me something to do other than be alone with my thoughts.
Priscilla leans over her plate and inhales the scented steam rising from it. “It smells so good, Luca.”
“I hope it tastes good too,” I reply.
“Everything you make does.” She looks up and smiles. “When you finally pick a woman, she’s going to be one lucky lady.”
Jake nudges her arm. “Don’t start already.”
“What?” she asks. “I just don’t get it. You’re such a catch. I don’t understand why you never go out with anyone.”
“We’ve been over this, Priscilla,” I say, as Jake rolls his eyes. “I’m not interested in dating.”
“But why?” she presses.
“It’s none of your business, Pris,” Jake scolds.
“I just don’t want you to be alone. You have a lot to offer a woman,” she adds, pushing her fork through her rice to cool it. “This girl I work with, Jordan, she would be perfect for you. She’s really smart, too.”
“I appreciate your concern for me, but I have my reasons. Perhaps someday I will change my mind, but not today.” I hope that my tone is enough of an indicator to her that we are done discussing this. “Love and relationships are not for everyone.”
Priscilla frowns and takes a bite of risotto. “Gah, this is amazing!”
“Thank you.” I take a sip of wine, thankful for the opportunity to change the topic. “How is work at the hospital going?” I ask her.
She chats for a while and then Jake fills me in on his latest buy out merger. These two are complete opposites, seemingly having nothing in common, but obviously, it works. They are one of the happiest couples I’ve ever seen.
“Are you planning to buy out every struggling company in New England?” I ask Jake.
“If I can. In a few years’ time, Priscilla can stop working and stay home.”
“Yeah,” she smiles. “It’ll be time for babies soon.”
“I look forward to meeting your children someday,” I say.
As we finish our meal, I remind myself that I am lucky to have these two. Lucky to have anyone who cares about me at all. I’ve pushed so many people away over the years, but these two have stayed. I should tell them I don’t date because there is no way I could hope to find a love like theirs. I blew my only chance.
“Let me help with the dishes,” Priscilla offers as we finish eating.
“No, no. That’s not necessary. I’ll do them later. Coffee?”
“I insist. You make the coffee, I’ll wash up.”
Jake just shrugs and carries his dish to the kitchen, following behind his headstrong but well-meaning wife. I do the same, realizing I won’t win this battle. Priscilla washes our plates, while I start the espresso machine.
“Cappuccino or espresso?” I ask.
“Cappuccino for me,” Priscilla says.
“I’ll take an espresso,” Jake adds.
“Perfect.” I make the drinks and we all retire to the living room.
“Is this new?” Priscilla asks as she runs her hand over the arm of my couch.
“It is.”
She plops down on it then frowns. “It’s beautiful, but it’s hard.”
“It’s for looks more than comfort.”
“Yeah, obviously.” She takes a sip of her drink. “So, are you sure I can’t get you to just meet Jordan? We could double date.”
Grimacing, I do my best to ignore her question and become suddenly very interested in my coffee. It won’t work, but I have to try. I absolutely hate being set up.
“Luca?” she asks.
“Why should I? Other than being smart, why should I meet her?”
“She isn’t just smart. She’s really pretty. Look.” She pulls her phone from her purse and scrolls to a picture of a pretty blond with delicate features, a big smile, and a petite frame. I notice she is quite thin with a nice shape. The green dress she wears highlights the fact that she has rather large breasts. She is very attractive. I feel a slight twinge between my legs I can only assume is my long neglected libido screaming for attention.
“She is pretty. It takes more than that, though.”
“Of course it does,” Priscilla says. “How would you know, though, if you don’t even meet her? All you have to do is eat dinner.”
Priscilla is right. I haven’t been on a date in ages. Part of me desires the company of a woman while the other part is terrified of getting to know someone again. My past always comes up and I back away. I’m just not ready to let anyone in. I sigh. What harm could dinner do, though?
“I’ll do it.” Both Jake’s and Priscilla’s eyes open wide. “It’s just dinner.”
“Seriously?” Priscilla asks.
“Yes. Assuming she wants to meet me.”
“She does! I showed her a picture of you and Jake after your boxing workout. She thinks you’re hot. Which you are, by the way.”
Smiling, I take another sip of coffee. “Thank you. It takes more than that, though,” I repeat.
“Yep. I’m proud of you. You’re an awesome guy.”
“Thank you,” I repeat.
After coffee, I walk my friends to the door. Jake puts his hand on my shoulder. “I’m surprised, but proud of you, man.”
“It’s just dinner,” I say, laughing. “Man’s gotta eat.”
Jake laughs. “Yeah. Just stay open-minded.”
“I’ll do my best.”
After showing my friends out, I decide to take a shower before I sit down to plan my class. As the water falls over me, I have to admit to myself that I’m just as surprised I agreed to meet Jordan. I must be lonelier than I thought.
I dry myself and put on my worn but comfortable Harvard sweatpants and a t-shirt. Sitting down at my desk, I throw myself into my work, distracting myself once again from the unpleasant thoughts that appear as soon as the silence comes. Will there ever be a day when I will be free from this emotional prison? It doesn’t feel like it.
IN MY ROOM, I finish brushing my hair and clip it off my face. Staring at my reflection, I notice how plain I’ve become. My eyes are dry after wearing my contacts all day, so I reluctantly take them out and put my glasses on instead. My mum says they highlight my eyes, but
I think they scream bookworm.
I know Madeleine will have full makeup, lashes, and lipstick on. She’ll be wearing flashy jewelry and perfume. She exudes sex appeal and confidence. Meanwhile, I look like the school librarian. Part of me wishes I could adopt Madeleine’s sexy style, but I know I just don’t have what it takes to pull it off. I let out a heavy sigh.
I put on my favorite dress. It’s flattering in the sense that it highlights what is good about my figure and downplays what isn’t. I like the tan color of it and the simple v-shaped neckline. Sliding my feet into brown, leather flats, I gaze at my reflection once more. Yep. Librarian.
Out in the living room, I wait for Madeleine to make her appearance. Moments later, she breezes into the room, her blond hair flat ironed into obedience. As predicted, she looks fantastic.
“Ready to go?” Madeleine asks.
“I am. You look lovely, Maddie.”
“Must impress big brother.” She giggles. “Sure you won’t let me put a bit of makeup on you?”
“I don’t need it. I’m not trying to impress anyone.”
“I know. It’s just that…”
“What?”
“You’re so pretty and you hide it.”
“I’m not hiding. I just don’t need to be flashy.”
“You’re calling me flashy?” As she speaks, the bangle bracelets on her wrists jingle around. She laughs. “Okay, I may be a bit.”
“I wouldn’t change a thing about you.” I put my arm around her shoulder. “Devon should be here any minute.”
Just as I finish speaking, a knock on the door alerts us to my brother’s arrival. Madeleine runs her tongue over her top teeth and flips her hair off her shoulder. I just smile and get my handbag off the dining room table.
Londyn Falls Page 3
