She was moving, rocking on him, grinding on him. He held on to her hips and let her set the pace, take her own pleasure from him.
She started riding him, her hips pumping, and he held her hips, moving her faster, harder.
Birdie’s eyes were on his, as she rode him, harder, faster. Their bodies were sweaty with passion and with the effort as they reached for more with every move. Her hands were in her hair, her head back, her back arched as she rode him, her muscles pulling and clenching at him, taking him further than he had gone before.
Adam had never seen a sight more beautiful than Birdie, riding him, her breasts moving with every thrust, lost in the heat of the moment. Her rich, dark skin was bathed in the dusk sunlight. He looked down to see his cock sliding in and out of her pussy, and he could see that his need was matched by hers.
“Adam,” whispered Birdie, urgently, and he moved her faster. She braced herself on his chest and bent down to take his lips in a long, hard kiss as she moved harder, faster, until she took herself over the edge and screamed his name, her body shuddering as she climaxed.
Adam held her hips and raised her, his hips bucking as he thrust into her, over and over again, until he joined her in that mad tumble that left them breathless and sated.
Birdie melted onto him, but she couldn’t find that peace she’d been looking for as she rode him.
The words were out in that unguarded moment, before she could stop them.
“Was it true?”
Adam knew. He knew what she meant.
But still…
“Was what true?”
“What Richard told Marley. What he told me. Was it all true?”
Her eyes were on his, damp, large, and so trusting. Adam wanted to lie. But in that moment, their bodies still joined, he trusted that they would find their way through it.
“Birdie… Birdie it wasn’t like that. It was true, then, but it’s not true anymore.”
Birdie felt her heart break, just a bit, as she drew away from him and got up. She could hardly feel her legs. It didn’t matter.
She picked up her clothes.
“Birdie, please, give me a chance to explain.”
Birdie turned around, her eyes full, her heartbreak so plain to see in their stormy depths.
“Not now, Adam. I’m going home.”
Adam got up now, urgently, as Birdie got dressed.
“Birdie, you’re home. You’re here. You’re home.”
“No, I’m not,” said Birdie, and she left, taking her shattered trust and her broken heart with her.
Birdie went where she always did when she was sad. She went home, and found Marley.
Marley read what had happened in her eyes, and said nothing. He simply opened his arms to her. Birdie walked into them, and all the tears she has held inside until she got home spilled out. Wracking sobs were wrenched from her until Marley thought they might break her apart. Helpless, he held her and said nothing, and felt his heart breaking a little, too.
Because Birdie might have come to him, but he knew this grief. He knew her. He knew that she loved Adam, beyond any doubt. Even if, in time, she accepted him as a lover, and accepted his love for her, she would never love him this way. She would never again love this way.
Adam had her heart, whether either of them liked it or not. All he could do was hold her, and offer what comfort he could, as he always had.
In that moment, as he held his crying love, he accepted that she would never be his. She deserved to be loved. She deserved to let herself love without hurting.
The only way he could let that happen would be if he let her go. So, he absorbed her pain into himself and let himself feel it all, and shed the tears for both of them, for what would never be.
He let himself cry it out, too. He needed to.
Birdie’s sobs finally subsided, though the tears wouldn’t dry. She felt as if she might never stop crying. The hurt was so big that she could hardly bear it.
“You were right,” she whispered, finally.
“You don’t know how much I wish I weren’t,” said Marley, his eyes haunted as he watched Birdie bravely try not to fall apart.
*****
It had been thirty-two days since the day she had left. She knew, because she had got flowers – not roses – on each day, and from each bouquet, she had pressed one flower.
But she didn’t take his calls. She didn’t call him back. She refused to see him at all.
She jumped when somebody walked up behind her, but it was Marley.
“Come,” said Marley.
“What? Can’t, studio is open.”
“Studio is closed. Come, or I’m heaving you over my shoulder and taking you,” warned Marley.
When Birdie didn’t even point out that there was no way in hell he could possibly do that and she could break him in half if she wanted to, Marley’s heart broke a little bit more.
Instead, she let him take her hand and guide her outside, and into a car. Birdie didn’t even notice the car.
“Where are we going?”
Marley shrugged. “Does it matter?”
“No,” admitted Birdie, and settled back, her eyes closed. The cool air on her face did feel good. She hadn’t been sleeping well. She hadn’t been sleeping at all. She dozed off.
“Birdie, we’re here,” said Marley, waking her up gently.
She woke up with a start and looked around. She blanched.
“Marley!”
His name was a betrayed accusation on her lips.
“I know. Just… Trust me. Trust me, Birdie. Please.”
Birdie wanted to run away. She wanted to be anywhere but where she was – because she was at the park where they’d planned to make their vows to each other, in front of everybody who mattered.
It was supposed to be her wedding day.
Birdie fought him, tooth and nail, as he finally heaved her out of the car.
“Don’t be a coward,” panted Marley, finally.
That did it. Birdie would take anything but accusations of being a coward. Stiffly, she followed Marley inside to what was supposed to be her bride’s quarters. She had seen it all.
What the hell was he supposed to do?
He shoved her into a room, closed the door, and left. Birdie’s eyes widened.
“Marley, what the hell are you playing at?”
“Birdie,” came a whisper, in a tortured voice that was still so dear to her that her heart trembled to hear it.
“What’s going on?” she asked, desperately trying to hold on to reality.
“Birdie, please, listen to me. Give me two minutes. Please. If you want to leave after that, I won’t stop you.”
Birdie was suddenly so tired that she couldn’t fight anymore. She sagged and nodded, leaning against the door.
“Birdie, I was a fool. I was a bigger fool that should be allowed to exist. After the accident, control became so important to me that my family was concerned. They thought that I was holding on to everything, burying myself in work, refusing to delegate, refusing to trust anybody. They thought that if I could find a good wife, I’d get better. They pushed me. But Birdie, I resisted that pressure for so long. I could’ve held on for all my life, if I had to. When I met you, you opened something in me. You made me need. You made me fall in love. But I was too weak to admit that to myself, so I used my family as justification for asking you to marry me. I was wrong. I realized I was wrong as soon as I put that ring you hate on your finger. But I’d already said all the wrong things to Richard. I was living in terror that Marley would tell you and you would leave me. With every day, I was waiting for the axe to fall. When it did, I knew I deserved it. But Birdie, I love you. I need you. The last thirty-two days have been worse than my accident, worse than everything. I need you. I need you, Birdie.”
Birdie heard the words, and she let them wash over her.
She closed her eyes. She felt him move closer to her.
“Birdie,” he whispered, and she opened h
er eyes.
He was on one knee, in front of her.
“Birdie, I love you. I love you so much. I will spend the rest of my life trying to make this up to you, trying to deserve you. I will never stop loving you. Marry me. Please.”
His heart was in his eyes. He had finally laid himself bare.
Birdie looked down at him and pictured a life without him, a life where she would be safe from being hurt again.
It was so empty that she never wanted to think about it again.
Kneeling down next to him, she leaned towards him, and kissed him, long, slow and sweet. She could taste the relief in his lips, and she could taste their tears, mingled.
“Yes, I will marry you,” she told him.
“Everything’s ready. Your dress is ready. Everybody’s here,” said Adam, hopefully.
Birdie finally smiled – her first smile in over a month.
This time, they were doing it right. She held him, and felt his heart beating against hers.
He needed her. He loved her, as she loved him. Finally, she knew that he loved her.
When you have love, you can always rise from fire, stronger than ever, thought Birdie, and she let herself be lost, and found, all over again.
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Be My Everything (Brothers From Money Book 11) Page 26
