by Skylar Kade
Arousal melted her core. The vivid picture twisted her into eager knots. “So why don’t we go home now?”
His jaw bunched. “No. We’re going to spend a nice day downtown, and by the time we get back home you’re going to ache for me as much as I do for you.” He released her abruptly, and she reached out a hand to steady herself on a nearby tree.
“It’s settled then.”
So why didn’t her plan make her feel as triumphant now as it had twenty minutes ago?
Maybe it had to do with the calculating glint in David’s eyes and the set of his shoulders. When she wasn’t the target of his determination, she could find it attractive. Now, she just wondered what she’d gotten herself into.
Chapter Ten
David led her back to the Metro stop, where they rode emptier train cars over to the Smithsonian station, their stop for the National Mall. Even though some of her underground anxiety had subsided, she didn’t tell David. Her phobia was a convenient excuse for having his body pressed up against hers.
It wasn’t until they surfaced onto the National Mall that it dawned on her—with their current arrangement, nothing stopped her from acting on her baser instincts. As long as she toed the line between lust and love, she could take full advantage of his body when it suited her.
As their feet crunched in the pebbles of the mall’s walkways, she tugged at his hand until he paused and turned to face her.
“Yes?”
She threw her arms around his neck and kissed him like she’d ached to do since earlier in the morning. A trickle of subway passengers flowed past them, a minor blip on the edges of her awareness.
David groaned and let slip a curse before resting his forehead against hers. “What was that for?”
“Because I can.” And wasn’t that the truth.
Hand in hand they dove into the milling crowd. David led the way across the wide gravel paths of the National Mall. Halfway to the other side, she paused and looked right to take in the Capitol, then left to see the Washington Monument piercing the clear blue sky.
The vastness washed over her—the millions of people who’d taken in this view over the decades, the millions more represented by those structures.
She clung to David, needing a human connection under that weighty shared history. He scuffled behind her in the gravel until his body warmed her back and he rested his cheek on her head.
She could have stayed like that forever.
One of her more dangerous thoughts, for sure. Taking on mass murderers and violent criminals and perpetrators of war crimes was no problem. Getting comfortable with David Cameron brought a whole different set of twisted issues.
Before she could step away from him, he flagged down a passerby. “Take our picture?”
The woman stopped, and David tapped the screen of his phone before he handed it over.
“Say cheese!” And with the press of a touch screen, the moment was immortalized. David thanked the woman, and she waved before continuing on her way.
“What do you think?” He held up the screen for her to look at.
She scoured the photo and winced at her forced smile. She looked lost. Not a great picture by any means.
But David’s face made her pause. The way he looked at her, not the camera, with such open emotion. It was too much for her to process. Compartmentalize and evaluate later. She returned the phone and pasted on a smile. “What’s next?”
From David’s eye-roll, she didn’t fool him. He’d have to deal with it. “We’re going to the National Museum of Natural History.”
Would he ever be able to predict Carrie’s moods? He was going to get neck strain from following her emotional tennis match and, despite his best efforts to distance himself, the more her moods swung, the more entrenched he became.
She was like a snarled ball of string. He remembered playing with knotted skeins of yarn while his mother crocheted baby blankets for his soon-to-be brother. He’d pull at one loop, sure it would unravel the whole thing, only to have it tighten a knot elsewhere. His mother had tried to teach him how to unravel it slowly, but he’d been unable to help himself.
By the time he’d broken himself of the habit of pulling at tangled messes, he actually could have used that personality flaw. Maybe it could have saved his brother.
Maybe it would save Carrie.
Buoyed by hope, he guided her across the street and walked up the wide, shallow steps of the National Museum of Natural History. He was pretty sure Carrie, in all her genius, wouldn’t really learn anything new, but he had a hunch she would light up when she saw the exhibits highlighting science and discovery and the wonders of the natural world. And if she didn’t have a good time, he at least would. He loved to explore this museum, mostly to see the kids interact with each display.
From the security line, he could see the rotunda elephant looming over students on field trips, tourists and other museum visitors. They all stared up in awe at the giant specimen.
Once they passed through security, the din of schoolchildren echoed throughout the cavernous main room loud enough that Carrie had to cozy up to him to be heard.
“Okay, tour guide, what are we going to see first?”
He took advantage of the moment, putting an arm around her to cut them off from the roaming children and the frazzled field-trip monitors trying to corral them. “Definitely rocks first. That wing has meteorites, gemstones, minerals and even the Hope Diamond.”
They waded through the groups until they stood at the base of the giant elephant display in the atrium. Carrie ran her fingers over the information tablet as if absorbing the information through her fingertips. David watched her eyes flutter over the text before she took in all the details of the exhibit and the school kids fanning out around the area.
When her gaze landed on a group of mothers pushing strollers through the crowd, she winced. It was so brief he almost missed it. She shut her eyes and took a deep breath.
He started to ask if she was all right, but then she spoke without a trace of tension in her voice. “He’s a Loxodonta africana. The raised trunk is an elephant greeting.”
It was possible he’d imagined her stress, but he’d keep an eye on her anyway. “I thought you’d know everything without having to read the plaques.” He rubbed his hands across her shoulders.
An impish grin spread across her lips. “Almost everything. Can we move on?”
“Sure.” He guided her up the wide corner staircase and onto the second floor.
After they entered the Earth, Moon, Meteorites exhibit hall, Carrie started to relax into him as they stopped to read the descriptions for a meteorite on display. He watched her take in all data and store it away for later use. Her enthusiasm grew until she was practically glowing. Caught up in it, David couldn’t help himself—he spun her away from one of the final displays to lay a kiss on her pink, parted lips, capturing her exhale with his mouth before releasing her.
“I love seeing you so happy. I take it this was a good idea?”
“Yes, it was. I’m having a surprisingly good time.” The unfettered joy in her voice warmed him.
After seeing minerals of incredible colors and gemstones glittering in the dim hall, they reached the Hope Diamond.
Carrie snugged herself against his side. “It’s so beautiful.” She stared at the slowly spinning display, as enthralled as every other woman in the room.
“You bet it is.” He skimmed his hand up and down her arm and watched her reactions to the display.
She stared at the slowly rotating necklace for so long he was pretty sure she’d forgotten about everything else in the room. After giving her ample time to admire the craftsmanship and sparkle, he leaned down to her ear. “I bet you’d look perfect in that…and nothing else.”
She bit her lip, but not before a moan slipped free. “You’re the one who didn’t want to go home earlier.”
He could see the bare outline of her nipples pressing against her thin tee-shirt. He ached to
run his fingers across them. They would pucker, she would blush and he would certainly test his control.
In college, he’d taken full advantage of being on the all-star baseball team, working through sorority girls with the same enthusiasm he showed on the field. It had tapered off, though, with grad school. He’d had fewer women, but the sex hadn’t been any less intense. He wasn’t ashamed by the number of women he’d slept with, but it wasn’t low by any means.
But not a single one of his past lovers had ever come close to making him lose it like Carrie did. All he needed was a hint of her citrusy scent or the glint in her eyes—patient tolerance, frustrated ire, or wicked calculation—and he was ready.
He swallowed to quench his parched throat, but the words still rasped out. “Trust me, Care, I want nothing more than to have you beneath me. If I thought we could get away with it, I’d find a dark corner in this museum and make you come until you scream.”
She shuddered against him, and those perfect nipples, a tender pink he dreamed about, tightened.
“But the truth is—I enjoy teasing you. And the more you want to leave to satisfy whatever lust you think you feel for me, the more I want it to build. Until you’re mindless with wanting me.”
She turned her head until his lips met her temple. “David—”
“Until you can’t separate lust from longing, Carrie. That’s when we’ll go home, and I’ll satisfy you until you can’t walk tomorrow.”
A sigh tumbled from her lips. The closeness of the crowd suddenly made him itch for fresh air. Or maybe it was the appreciative looks men gave Carrie. She had the glow of a well-pleasured woman, and her eyes were slumberous and sexy. He knew how they felt, but it didn’t mean he wanted anyone imagining her pleasure being theirs.
Tucking her under his arm, he forged a path away from the Hope Diamond and back into the crowded hallway to head for the Insect Zoo.
In her condo, she had a collection of butterflies under glass, specimens representing some of the places she’d visited. He wanted to watch her interact with the live-butterfly exhibit and see if her fascination with insects extended to more creepy-crawly species. He expected it would—Carrie wasn’t the kind of woman to get squeamish about bugs. She’d be too busy being fascinated by them.
Before he could go too far, Carrie poked at his ribs. “Stop, David, hold on. Can we talk?”
He pulled her to a stop against the balcony overlooking the main atrium. She turned away from him to take in the bird’s-eye view of the elephant display. He braced his arms around her. To all the world, they looked like a couple simply watching the main-floor activity.
It was anything but simple. “Yes?”
“This—you—it’s too much.” She sounded unsure, a state she probably wasn’t comfortable with. She shifted, and her ass rubbed against the front of his jeans.
He bit back a curse and clenched his hands against her too-bony hips. “Hold still, Care, unless you’re trying to distract me.”
She froze. “Sorry. But this is exactly what I’m talking about. I thought you wanted to show me around the city, not drive me bonkers.”
His hands slid upward to dip in with her waist, skim along the sides of her breasts, then slide down her arms and trap her more completely against the low wall. “If my company has you so twisted in knots, maybe there’s a good reason why.”
The cacophony of voices from the main floor filled the space, while Carrie’s hands tightened and loosened on the balcony railing.
“Don’t pull that on me, David. You’re not going to turn this around. You’re pushing me—” He pressed his hips against hers, a reminder of how much she turned him on. “I…I don’t appreciate it,” she finished, though she’d lost much of her intensity.
“See, I don’t believe you. Driving you bonkers, I’ll take credit for.” He kissed her vulnerable neck just to watch a shiver work across her skin. “But you love this. You crave it. And don’t try to tell me otherwise. Everything you don’t want to say, your body shouts for you.”
She hung her head, until her fine red hair covered her face.
“Tell me I’m wrong.”
Long moments passed before she shook her head.
A group of kids ran to the railing next to them to point and shout at people on the ground floor. She stiffened, relaxing only once they’d been recalled to their group by the teacher.
“So, what’s the problem?” He circled his thumb on the soft skin of her inner wrist.
Her deep inhale pressed her back against his chest. “I get lost in you.”
Her words were so quiet he almost missed the pain in them, but every syllable stabbed into his gut. This was the reassurance that Carrie needed someone—needed him. She couldn’t even let herself feel lust without anxiety attached to it.
But why? What in her past had scared her off relationships? As a friend, he wanted to find out. As a psychologist, he needed to, for her sake.
He tugged on her shoulder and cupped her cheeks once she faced him. “For one day, one afternoon, just feel. I promise I will catch you if you stumble.” He dipped his head to steal a kiss. “Friends with benefits, right?”
She nodded.
“So let me be your friend. Trust me that much.”
Fear widened her eyes. “I can’t think around you, David. Not about anything important.”
“Well, tell me what has you so worried. Maybe I can help.”
“Work! My next case, whether Gunnerson needs me, how badly Dr. Stevens is messing up my case filing system. But you crowd out all of those thoughts. It’s like my skin doesn’t fit today, and it aches.” She let her head sink forward against his chest.
“So you’re thinking about me. And you.”
A muffled confirmation sounded from her lips mashed against his shirt.
“Well I think both of those things are pretty damn important.” Before she could argue, he was hit with inspiration. “Let’s reason this out.”
Her head lifted and she gave him a doubting look.
“Just bear with me, okay? And don’t interrupt. Just nod if you agree.”
She started to speak, but bit her lip before nodding.
“Have you had trouble focusing on work lately?”
She nodded again.
“That’s what I thought. Now, do you feel more rested than you did last Thursday? More able to focus, even if it’s just on you and me?”
Another nod.
“All right. So don’t you think, if you use this vacation to recuperate, it will benefit your work when you return, that you’ll be back on your game—more so than if you hadn’t taken it?”
Her eyebrows rose, and her chin just barely dipped. Her eyes never left his.
“Then think of everything that happens this week as recharging, so you can return as the implacable Dr. Carrie Farrow everyone knows and fears. Trust me, as your friend, to keep us on track. Everything we’ve done, everything we will do, is all moving you closer to your goal.”
He recognized the analytical expression she wore, and held his breath until she gave her verdict.
“I can accept that as a valid conclusion.” Her arms crossed. “And you agree that when I go back to work, our arrangement will end?”
Apprehension stabbed his gut. With care he banished all those complicated emotions from his voice. “Yes, if that is what you decide. But I will always—always—be here as a friend.”
And as long as she was back to her normal, if distant, self, he’d be satisfied. And then he’d probably win the lottery and fly off on a Pegasus.
“You’re still overwhelming me.”
“That’s kind of the point, Care. I don’t want you to think beyond this day. And because I’m such a self-sacrificing, nice guy, I’ll continue to distract you until it’s time to go back to work, if that’s what you need. In my expert opinion as your friend, that’s my prescription.”
She bit her lip and her eyes crinkled in repressed laughter. “Fine, David. You win this round.” Then sh
e stuck her tongue out at him, and damned if it didn’t give him ideas.
How a woman of her serious genius managed to have such moments of goofiness, he didn’t know, but it cracked him up. He smirked, then gave her some breathing room as he led her to the other side of the museum and the Insect Zoo.
They stopped at the Butterfly Pavilion and took advantage of the free Tuesday admission to the interactive exhibit. Inside the miniature ecosystem, live plants made the air thick and humid while butterflies drifted throughout the enclosure.
She stood near one of the flowers in bloom to watch the butterflies—or Lepidoptera, as she called them—flitting around to sip the sweet nectar. When a huge moth landed on her palm, she practically squealed, a huge grin on her face.
She froze and spoke from the corner of her mouth. “It’s a Luna moth.”
He stepped back to take in the whole view, her innocent wonder exactly what he’d hoped to evoke in her during their outing. While the moth gave a lazy flap of its big, light-green wings, David slipped out his smartphone and captured the moment. Carrie, too engrossed to notice or get self-conscious, was radiant. A kaleidoscope of wings rose behind her in the photo, the perfect contrast to the marvel on her face.
Damn, he loved that woman.
Chapter Eleven
For a few hours, Carrie actually relaxed. They browsed the rest of the second floor then dipped in and out of some of the main-floor halls. David continued to take pictures of her, some with a wry smile on her face while she stared down the camera lens, others where he caught her unguarded and absorbed in some exhibit.
If she did indeed cut him off after her experiment with vacationing, he’d need the reminder of their time together—a shred of hope that she’d let him in, at some point down the road.
