“Don’t you think that may be why this is so hard for you, because you keep it buried inside? You know, that’s why people see shrinks…”
“Maybe.”
“I respect you, Alex, and I won’t push you, but you need to know that I am here for you if you ever…you know, need someone.”
Relieved, Alex muttered, “Thank you.”
Chris returned to the recliner. “I want you to know one more thing: I have a vague idea about what happened. The connection I was talking about before seems to have come with its own set of visions.”
“Ok.” Good thing I’m not alive or this would probably shock the life out of me. “Are you saying that you can see my thoughts?” The idea that Chris might actually be able to see why he was hurting was almost too much to digest.
“Like I said before, don’t worry about me, Alex, it’s you I worry about. I don’t know how you can bear it.”
“Chris, I’m sorry, I’m just not ready.”
“It’s ok.”
“Thank you.”
After a long and uncomfortable silence, Chris began to pace the room. “Alex, I’m bored; let’s go do something.”
“It’s only a few hours until dawn.”
“So, we’ll make it back.”
“I want to stay here.”
Chris shook his head. “See, Alex, this is half the reason you are so depressed; you stay inside cooped up all the time. You are immortal,” Chris waved his hands in the air for emphasis, “you have all the time in the world to do everything you have ever even thought of doing. Mortals have time against them and some of them die without doing anything they wanted to do. You should live it up and take advantage of the gift that you have been given.”
“I don’t need a lecture, Chris; I have been given a curse, not a gift, and I hate what I am. I beg the Lord every night to forgive me for what I am.”
“It wasn’t your choice, Alex.”
“I know, but that doesn’t make it any better.”
Chris slumped back into the recliner and threw up his hands. “See, Alex, you need to lighten up and have some fun.”
“So now you’re a shrink?”
“Oh, and you want to be a joker.”
Alex was actually fighting to keep a straight face. “I’m not joking.”
“Ok, fine, I’ll leave it alone, but…”
“Stop it, Chris.”
“No, listen, I know you’re hungry, so let’s go eat.”
Alex lowered his head. “You got me on that one.”
“Well, let’s go.”
As he didn’t want to acknowledge his hunger, he silently rose and followed Chris to get their coats.
4
Sunlight shone on him; sunlight he hadn’t seen for over a hundred years. He squinted his eyes into slits and looked around. He saw that he was in a large field of tall golden grass. An enormous oak tree, with its thick branches spread far and wide, stood in the center of the field and soaked up the sunlight. He mimicked the tree, spread out his arms and tilted his face towards the cloud peppered sky. He closed his eyes and let the long forgotten warmth envelope him.
Underneath his eyelids, he saw little black dots that floated around and then disappeared. He could feel droplets of sweat start to form in the space between his nose and upper lip. He let his tongue slip out and taste the saltiness of sweat he hadn’t felt for a hundred years.
“Daddy.”
His eyes popped open. He spun in a circle until he was again facing the massive oak. Attached to the tree with a thick rope was a tire swing that hadn’t been there before. A young girl sat in the swing. She looked to be about ten years old.
A head of fiery auburn curls surrounded her face which appeared to be as white as his. The strangest thing were her eyes; they were beautiful black eyes that he had seen somewhere before.
“Daddy, come push me.”
Even though they were alone, Alex knew she wasn’t talking to him; he didn’t have a daughter anymore.
“Daddy, come on.”
She slid off her swing and ran in his direction. Her pink sundress with white flowers grazed the grass as she ran. When she got to him, she took his hand in both of hers.
Giggling, she pulled and pulled until he let her pull him towards the swing.
Suddenly, she stopped and looked up at him with wide eyes. “Daddy, don’t you want to push me? You said you would.”
Alex didn’t know what to say. He thought she had him mistaken for someone else, but if she couldn’t find her daddy, then damn it, he would push her.
Alex jerked up and smacked his head on the lid of his coffin. Dreaming. Yes, he had been dreaming. He slowly opened the lid and thought about how strange it was that he would only get to see the sunlight when he was locked inside that thing.
After he had dressed, he went to his car. Rain still poured out of the darkened sky. While he drove, visions of the young girl from his dream clouded his mind; she had looked just like his daughter would have if she had lived to that age.
The eyes were his daughter’s, but it was not her. He would have known his own daughter. Why would he dream of a girl calling him daddy that was not his own child?
He stopped in front of the church and ran up the stairs to the entrance. Once again, he knelt in front of the altar and bowed his head.
“Lord, why do you bring me such strange dreams? I have never seen the child that came to me in my sleep.
I don’t understand and, therefore, I feel helpless; is it your will that I feel this way? I have been so powerful for so long that every now and then I need to be shown my place. Is that what is happening? Because it is working. I have seen a lot of strange and terrible things; not much gets me worked up these days, but that dream really bothered me. It confuses me. There will be much death and innocents will perish along with the evil in the days to come. Malcolm is a true demon; he and his consorts must die so that some peace can come into this world. Please, Lord, guide me through the days that are ahead of me.
Also, could you help free Chris from this pain that he carries because of me? He does not deserve to bear my burden. I would never knowingly do anything to hurt him, and yet I have been doing it all along.
Thank you for all that you have given to me. I am always in your debt. Amen.”
After he had finished praying, he sat in a pew to absorb the pure tranquility of the church…the peace.
Whenever he was in the church, he felt like his troubles were gone; but the minute he left, they returned. Alex sat for some time and then forced himself to leave.
The moment he stepped outside, the rain intensified. Still, he decided to take a walk instead of going straight to the casino.
He trudged carelessly through the rapidly flooding water without giving a single thought to his expensive shoes or leather jacket.
The rain certainly didn’t stop the night life of the city. Teenagers stood around smoking and laughing, drunks staggered back and forth, and women in evening gowns shared the shelter of awnings with homeless people. Men in business suits, drug dealers, male and female prostitutes, and runaways all roamed the streets together. Right in the middle of them were, of course, your average, run of the mill vampires.
Alex closed his mind after a few minutes of being in the crowds; the voices and thoughts of so many people echoed too loudly in his head. He paid little attention to others so they made their way around him.
He walked and walked until he noticed that there were hardly any people on the sidewalks anymore. He had made his way into a residential area, though it wasn’t a nice one.
When he finally came out of his fog of thoughts enough to pay attention to his surroundings, he wasn’t surprised at why the pedestrian traffic had slowed so much. Garbage floated down the gutters like little paper sailboats and glass from broken bottles threatened to puncture the soles of his shoes. There were even hypodermic needles tossed carelessly onto the ground.
He kept his fast pace, which was a full out sprint f
or a human, and made his way through the squalid neighborhood. Many of the houses looked like they should be condemned. The streets were completely empty except for a few stray dogs looking for scraps. The dogs whimpered and gave him a wide berth when he passed.
He slowed to a normal human paced walk because he heard footsteps. Far away, but coming his way. Alex perked up his senses and heard the footsteps turn out of an alley and start to follow him. He could smell that it was a man. He sighed. Even without reading his mind, he knew what was going to happen; it wasn’t the first time nor would it be the last.
When he felt the human close enough behind him, he came to an abrupt stop. He could smell the humans’ blood when it suddenly began to pump faster. Swiftly, his coat fanning out in circular motion, Alex turned to face him.
The young man’s right hand flew up and planted a nine millimeter Smith and Wesson in Alex’s face. Just as quickly, the young man’s surprise turned to fear. Alex propelled forward with lightning speed, grabbed each of the guy’s arms in his powerful fists and pinned him against the brick wall behind them. The gun fell to the ground with a dull clatter.
“What do you want?” Alex hissed.
“N…nothing,” the other guy stammered.
“You were going to rob me.”
“No,” the man pled, “no, I swear I was just walking.”
“Liar.” Alex seethed.
“No, please, I’m not.”
Alex held him spread-eagled against the wall, so close that he could feel the young man’s heart beating against his own chest.
“Then why did you carry a weapon?” For emphasis, Alex squeezed the stranger’s left hand and slammed it into the wall. There was a crackling sound as the bones in his hand were shattered. Bits of brick rained down onto the sidewalk.
The man screamed in pain and then finally managed to whimper. “P…please let me go.”
Control became less of an option now; Alex’s anger blazed through his body like a spreading fire. These kinds of people, he knew their kind. They sat silently in the shadows and preyed upon innocent people that they could rob or rape, then kill.
He wanted to tease him, make him think he had a chance.
“Oh, so you think I should let you go?” he asked him although he had no intention of doing so.
“Yes…yes. I promise, I won’t bother you again…or anyone,” he added when Alex didn’t release him.
Alex leaned closer so that his mouth almost touched the guy’s ear and whispered, “I know you won’t hurt anyone else.”
Then he pulled his head back so that they were face to face. Alex opened his mouth and let the man watch as what appeared to be normal teeth grew into fangs.
“Oh my god.” The man started to struggle and scream, writhing around like a mouse in a trap. Alex brought his mouth to the pulsing artery in his neck and pierced the tender skin.
When the blood started to flow, he suctioned his mouth against the skin. The warm fluid that was the young man’s life force became his own. When he drank, he was not himself; he was the monster.
He drank until there was no life left in the man; then he released him and let his body fall to the ground with a sickening thump. He hated killing; he hated that he needed blood, and worse, that he liked the blood.
Alex fell to his knees next to the dead man’s bloody body and wept. It felt like he was sitting on the cold wet cement for an eternity, waiting for the rain to wash away any traces of blood. He didn’t want to move; he felt no less guilty for taking the life of a man who would go to hell anyway. He was no one’s judge. Looking up into the cloud blackened night, the rain on his face, he whispered, “Lord, please forgive me.”
When he had regained his composure, he started to walk even faster than before. As he moved, his body tingled from the revitalizing effect of fresh blood. His sight was sharper, so sharp that he could see each rain drop fall and separate like diamond shards. He kept his mind closed because he didn’t want to hear anything but the drumming of the rain.
As he walked, he tried to console himself with the notion that his victim had been a killer and would have killed him if he was mortal. It didn’t make him feel better; an eye for an eye just wasn’t going to clear his conscience. It was not the person that caused him to kill; it was his blood lust, something he could only deny for short periods of time. His own personal vendetta to kill only bad guys didn’t always work; he did have accidents.
Out of the silence of the night, a shrill scream tore through his head. Pain like he had never felt before struck like lightning bolts through his head. He screamed too. His head felt like it was going to explode. Both his hands flew to his head and he fell to the ground. Water splashed all around him as he went down face first.
“AAAAHHH, Damn it, damn it!”
Alex rolled over onto his back and lay there in the flooded street clutching his aching head until it began to clear enough for him to think. He started to get to his feet again, but before he could even ask himself what had happened, it hit again.
The short repetitive shriek sent jolts of pain throughout his entire body; he seized over and over again and cried right along with it.
“Lord…God, make it stop.”
He whimpered over and over again.
The noise gradually subsided but he could still hear its echo in the back of his mind.
“What was that?” he asked out loud.
He was hearing the crying in his head, not with his ears, which meant it was coming from out of earshot, even for him.
Wait, Alex thought, how could I hear that if my mind was closed? What in the world is going on?
“Oh no!”
It got louder again. Not able to take anymore, Alex closed his eyes, took a deep breath and embraced the noise inside his head. Then, with superhuman speed, he flew through the streets and alleyways for several blocks until he came to where the noise was coming from.
The rain still poured down and the cement was flooded with inches of water. Alex focused on the horrible shrieking and followed the echoing sound waves. He was led into an alley, and finally, his brain connected with the sound.
Baby!
His eyes moved quickly around the alley. The crying continued but he could not see its source yet. On either side of him, there were large brick apartment buildings, and two brown city dumpsters took up some space at the opposite entrance to the alley.
Alex focused on the dumpsters and started into that direction. As he walked forward, the shrieking became louder and louder. Alex had no idea what to do; he knew what was in that dumpster…he knew it, and yet, he continued to move forward.
While he cautiously crept toward the dumpsters, he thought, What am I going to do when I find it? Just leave it there? Eat it? Most vampires would like a tasty snack like that but he didn’t do that kind of thing.
No…he didn’t know what he was going to do but that crying was like some kind of tractor beam. He could not tear himself away; he had to see it.
When reached the dumpster, he paused before he viciously flipped open the lid, stepped up on the side, and leaned over to see in. There was indeed a baby.
Alex’s breath caught when he laid his eyes upon the unclothed baby girl that couldn’t have been more than a day or two old, lying among all kinds of trash. There was no choice; he reached in, took hold of her with both hands and lifted her out.
The moment he cradled her in his arms, her crying seemed to diminish into short rapid breaths. She had been screaming for so long that she could barely breathe, and her little body was beet red from the top of her head to the tip of her toes. He jumped down from the dumpster with the agility of a cat and took a good look at her.
Alex could not believe what he saw.
No, no it couldn’t be! His mind began to reel. That child had a full head of red hair, and even with all the crying she had done, she managed to open her eyes…her black eyes.
“Danielle!” Alex shouted her name; he shouted it like he never had before. “Da
nielle! I need you!”
Why doesn’t she come? She is always around, but when I really need her, she isn’t. Impatiently, he shouted again, “Come on, Danielle!”
Then, from out of nowhere, she walked into the alley. Her dark hair was plastered to her body.
“What is this?” he demanded.
5
“This is the answer to your prayers, Alex.” Danielle gazed at the crying baby in Alex’s arms.
“What?” She must be a crazy angel, Alex thought.
“Didn’t you ask for something to live for?”
“Danielle, you know exactly who this baby looks like.” He couldn’t stop his voice from trembling.
“Alex, you must calm down; this is what the Lord wants and you claim to be one of his servants…so you must do what he asks.”
“Has he forgotten that I am a vampire? Danielle, how am I supposed to take care of a human child?”
“That will come in time; right now, we need to get this baby warm before she freezes to death.”
“Where are we taking her?”
“Home.”
“My home?” Alex was quite sure that he sounded like an idiot but he was also sure he was entitled to sound like an idiot. I can’t believe this is happening.
“Yes, and we can talk about it more in the car. Let’s go!”
He dangled the hyperventilating baby in front of him with outstretched arms and then passed her to Danielle. “Hold her.”
Danielle hugged the baby to her chest to protect her from the persistent rain.
While Danielle held her, Alex quickly checked the inside of his jacket to make sure it was dry. Then, he took it off and wrapped it around the baby. Danielle handed over the bundled up baby. Alex reluctantly took her in his arms.
“Let’s go,” he muttered and headed in the direction that would take them back to his car.
Birth of Jaiden Page 3
