Mancave

by Jo Raven

  She’s so pretty. She’s like this urban goddess, with her chic haircut, the highlights, the tall, curvy body. I’ve always felt like a little girl beside her.

  Not anymore, though, I realize as I lean closer, listening to tales of Shawn’s feats of destruction, laughing until my side hurts. No idea when the change happened, and I doubt it has to do with the way my boobs grew bigger these past few months.

  It’s how Matt loves me, I think and lean back, wiping tears of laughter from my eyes. The way he looks at me, the way he holds me, like I’m the most beautiful woman in the world. It took me a while to believe it—heck, a couple of years—but it’s finally seeped in, the knowledge that he only wants me, and no other girl.

  That’s enough to make a girl feel like a princess, right?

  Ashley squirms on my lap, and I stroke her fuzzy head. My life is perfect.

  Almost perfect. Evan is moving to St. Louis this week, and I really hope he’ll tell his daughter the truth, that he’ll find peace, and a love of his own.

  And Ross… Yeah, not going to think about him any longer. I hope he finds his own peace, somehow. He, and Jasper, and everyone in Destiny. I won’t feel responsible for them any longer.

  I’ll save my time and energy for those who love me, those who earned a place in my heart. And there are many of those around me, and more I have yet to meet.

  Right, Bean?

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Matt

  Mount Olive Cemetery is a quiet, beautiful place. The grass is green, the tombstones white, a warm wind whistling between them.

  I go down to one knee at my father’s grave. There’s a bunch of withered flowers lying at the tombstone. Probably Kaden’s doing. He comes here sometimes, he told me, to talk to Dad. Ask him questions.

  He says Dad never answers, but he likes coming anyway. The answers come later.

  When Dad died, I wasn’t in the right state of mind to visit here. I made it to the funeral, then I vaguely remember leaving the kids with my mom and going to get shitfaced in a bar downtown St. Louis. I honestly can’t remember when and how I made it home after that. Coming on the heels of Emma’s death, it destroyed me.

  “Sorry, Dad,” I whisper. “I’m a poor excuse of a son. But I’m trying. I’m becoming better. God, I wish you were still here.”

  Kaden says Dad was never much of a father—which always made me wonder why he keeps visiting his grave. He probably means he wanted Dad to be more, give more. Kaden’s the younger one. Was I Dad’s favorite? I can’t quite remember.

  Point is, Dad did all he could. He was who he was, never pretended to be Father of the Year. But he loved Mom. Loved us. He stood by me when I lost Emma, and it all went to hell. He was there, a quiet presence. Helped take care of my kids. Of me.

  “Thank you.” I dig my fingers into the wet earth. “I hope you knew how grateful I was. I am. Always will be.” My eyes feel hot. I press one hand over them. “I’m trying, too, you know. I won’t stop trying to be a good father. I think… it’s not a quality. You can never be a good father. You’re always in the process of trying, yeah? You’re being a good father. Through the good moments, the bad moments. The good calls, the bad ones. I figure, as long as I love my kids more than life itself, and put them first, I’ll be a good father. I just hope it’s enough.”

  “It is enough,” a voice says from behind me, and I turn to look at Evan with Melissa. I didn’t see them approach. I’d left them by my truck, outside the cemetery. “More than enough, Matt, and you know it.”

  Maybe. “I’m ready to go now.”

  “You sure? We can wait. I was just showing Melissa the tombstones.”

  “I’m sure. I just wanted to say hi to Dad.” I pat the wet earth and get up. “Should have done it long ago.”

  “Well, it’s never too late, is it? It’s—” Evan stops, looks down at Melissa. “Never too late. I hope.”

  I clap him on the shoulder. “Right. Just don’t wait too long, yeah?”

  He nods and tugs Melissa against his side. “Yeah.”

  “Is my daddy in here?” she asks, pointing at the tombstones. “Evan, is he dead? Is he buried here? Is he—?”

  “No, he’s not,” he says, and pulls her away from my dad’s grave. He swears under his breath.

  “Better do this sooner than later,” I say, following them down the paths toward my truck. “You know I’m right.”

  “Working on it, man. I need some more time. Let me settle in St. Louis, find a place to stay, see how you like my work at the garage…”

  I watch Melissa run to the truck. “Those are excuses, Evan.”

  He shakes his head and stops, turns to face me. “I wouldn’t be a good father.”

  “You know I thought the same about myself. You can be a great dad, buddy. You’re already doing it.”

  “She’ll hate me when she finds out.” He looks at her over his shoulder. “When I tell her I lied all this time.”

  “Girls are hard to figure out,” I mutter, and hide a grin. “But trust me. You’ll do great. And if not, I’ll come kick your ass.”

  “Promise?” A faint grin spreads on his face.

  “What are friends for? You have my word.”

  “I’ll hold you to it,” he says, still grinning and heads to the truck.

  I have a feeling everything’s going to turn out fine. And if not, well, hell. We’ll all just keep trying until we get it right. That’s how love works.

  Octavia taught me that. And I’ll never forget it.

  Acknowledgments

  Loads of people I would like to thank, as with every project. I always forget some, so if you commented, messaged or otherwise helped me while writing and editing this book, or any of my books, I thank you with all my heart. You’re incredible.

  A big shout-out to my amazing beta readers for their enthusiasm and super helpful feedback: Lisa Anderson, Vicki Pearce, Rebecca Teem, Cassie May, Claire Wright, Nico Maeckelberghe, Maxine McCormick, and J. Madiol.

  Many thanks to Jade West, Tracy Comerford, Sam Destiny, Kerry Fletcher, Lisa Anderson, Alison Foster, Kia Zi Shiru, Lainey Da Silva, Clarissa Wild, Maya Hughes and Brandy Freeman for their friendship and support.

  My love to Jo’s Ravens—my amazing readers’ group—and my review team who rock my world every day with their enthusiasm, support, and general awesomeness.

  Special thanks to the people who wrote to tell me they liked the story, and especially those who got back to me with errors to fix and replies to my endless questions. Like always, any remaining errors are my fault.

  As always, my gratitude to my amazing editor and to my formatter, 5 Times Chaos.

  Love my cover, thanks to the amazing Letitia Hasser of RBA Designs | Romantic Book Affairs (http://www.rbadesigns.com/) and Eric Battershell for the great photography, and the model Nick Bennett for the great picture!

  If I forgot to mention someone, please forgive me. I am grateful to every single person who has read my books, who has messaged me and supported me on this journey. I am here because of my lovely readers. May you all be well and happy. I am truly blessed to have such amazing friends.

  Jo Says

  CAVEMAN was one of those books I worried over. Over how brutish my protagonist was, how big the age gap between him and his girl, how her whole family fit in, and even about the cover. I am so happy readers enjoyed it and made it one of my bestselling books.

  Therefore, writing an epilogue was a no-brainer, a thank you to the fans who made it happen—and it was also no hardship. I love all my books, and all my characters, and it is always a joy to return to a world I have created. I hope you have enjoyed the story!

  What’s next:

  Gigi is getting her own story in Bad Wolf, coming out beginning of February. Ross will also get his own story, as will Merc, and Evan. That’s the plan, if all goes well.

  In the plans is also a Reverse Harem novel – with Gigi’s friend, Sydney. What Reverse Harem means, loosely, is that Sydney will have a sto
ry with all three of the boys she’s in love with, and that there will be a happy ending with all four of them together. This will be a challenge to write, for sure!

  Still in line to be written:

  A third book in the Hot Candy series.

  More books in my M/M (gay) romance series which started with Jagged Edge.

  Books in the Bad Boy Escorts series which started with Riot.

  The Lost Boys series which is a spin-off of the Inked Brotherhood and Damage Control series.

  Soulstain, the tattoo shop guys who visited Damage Control in OCEAN who may get their own stories.

  Colt’s story (Inked Brotherhood spinoff story. If you read RAFE, you may remember Colt who also fought in the underground fight club).

  Jackass and Co.: the trilogy about Jesse Lee’s funny roommates.

  Any particular story you would like me to write? Let me know! Also, if you haven’t, join my readers group where we discuss and vote on projects, covers and generally have fun! ▶ http://on.fb.me/1K2LvzO.

  Author Bio

  Jo Raven is a New York Times and USA Today bestselling author, best known for her series Inked Brotherhood and Damage Control. She writes edgy, contemporary New Adult romance with sexy bad boys and strong-willed heroines. She writes about MMA fighters and tattoo artists, dark pasts that bleed into the present, loyalty and raw emotion.

  Find all my books here ▶ http://joraven.com/books

  Be the first to get your hands on my new releases & offers, giveaways, previews, and more by signing up here ▶ http://bit.ly/2cQmBuF

  Meet me online—on Facebook ▶ https://www.facebook.com/AuthorJoRaven, chat with me on Twitter ▶ @AuthorJoRaven, and join my readers group for sneak previews of my covers and stories ▶ http://on.fb.me/1K2LvzO.

  Reviews Matter…

  If you like my books, please think to leave a review on amazon or any other site. It would mean the world to me, and it helps me get the word about my books out there. Thank you!

  Have you read the Inked Brotherhood series?

  Five boys brought together by fate. Five young men trying to overcome their troubled pasts. Five tattoos marking them as a brotherhood built on tragedy. Will they find understanding and rise above the pain?

  Five girls tied by friendship. Five young women fighting their own demons. Five lives laced with sorrow. Will they be strong enough to save the men they love and make them happy?

  The series comprises five interconnected, stand-alone novels: Asher, Tyler, Zane, Dylan and Rafe.

  GET IT HERE

  After the Inked Brotherhood, comes DAMAGE CONTROL:

  The Damage Control series is set in the same world as Inked Brotherhood. The boys of Damage Control were taken in by Zane Madden and Rafe Vestri and offered apprenticeship and work in the tattoo shop Damage Control.

  The series comprises five interconnected, stand-alone novels: Micah, Jesse, Seth, Shane and Ocean.

  GET IT HERE

  Do you like romantic suspense and bad boy millionaires? How about giving my new series, SEX AND BULLETS, a try?

  LINKS HERE