“So now what?”
“I guess I’m moving to New Jersey.”
“Oh, well, okay then,” was all I could say. “I’m happy and shocked at the same time. I can’t believe you just quit your job.”
“I know, love makes you do crazy things.”
“Tell me ’bout it.”
“Well, honey. I have a lot to do, I guess I’ll call you later. You’re off on Saturday, right?”
“Actually, I’m off on Sundays and Mondays.”
“Okay, that works out great. I’ll take a few days and get myself together and drive up Saturday. I’ll be lying in your arms after you get off work Saturday.”
“Lying in my arms, what happened to my hot meal and hot bath?” I said, laughing.
“You crazy, girl, I love you for that. I’ll call you later.”
As I hung up the phone and began to walk back to the office, I just realized what just happened. Toni was about to move in with me. My head started to spin with the thought of living with a man I just met a few months ago. “Calm down. Remember, he’s your soulmate,” I reminded myself, as I felt like throwing up.
My mind wasn’t right for the rest of the day. I couldn’t help but think of what was going to really happen between Toni and me. This relationship had been working great long distance, but everyone knows things change when the distance is gone.
“JR, what time is call time tomorrow?” Matthew, my producer, asked.
“I’m so sorry, it’s seven a.m.” I made the announcement to the crew that call time was seven a.m. tomorrow and wished them all a good night.
“JR, are you okay?” Matthew asked. “You’ve been out of it the whole afternoon. You even almost missed the lunch meeting. You’ve been doing great the last month, but I’m getting nervous.”
“I’m sorry, Matthew, I assure you after a good night’s sleep, I’ll be on top of things again. It’s been a crazy day, but again I apologize.”
“Alright then, JR, have a great night, get some sleep, and we’ll see you tomorrow at 6:30 a.m.”
“Yup,” I agreed, sounding upbeat. “Six thirty for our morning meeting and then off we go. Tomorrow we’re working on scene ten and we’re ahead of the production schedule, so this should make you happy.”
“Always happy to save some money,” Matthew said.
As much as I enjoyed working freelance, I also had a heart and felt bad when producers or directors tried to cut the production schedule to save money. Even cutting the schedule by two days was two days less in someone’s paycheck since most of the crew worked for a day rate or a week rate.
I got in my car and began to drive home when the thought of Toni moving to New Jersey popped back into my head.
“I can do this; this is good news,” I assured myself. The last guy I lived with was my ex-boyfriend from college in 1999. But that was short lived because we were young and dumb. Besides, his mother paid his half of the rent and it helped me save some money. I’d learned over time there were better ways to cut corners without jeopardizing my lifestyle.
“How would Toni moving in jeopardize my lifestyle?” I said to myself and laughed. He was a great guy; how bad could it be? I enjoyed my freedom, but I was getting older, so maybe this was a good thing and I would be ready for this.
As soon as I said that, I looked up as my car passed my exit home. “Crap.”
Then my phone started ringing.
I looked down and noticed it was Toni. I had to pick up; maybe this would help calm my nerves.
“Hey, babe.”
“Hey, pretty lady, what you doing?” Toni said with excitement.
“I’m driving home, hoping to just jump in the shower and then go straight to bed.” I was trying to be nice and say I didn’t want to be up on the phone all night. After my talk with Matthew, I needed to be well rested for work tomorrow.
“Oh, okay,” Toni said, sounding disappointed.
“I’m ten minutes from home, so we can chat.”
“I love the fact you found this gig in New Jersey. This way you don’t have to deal with the train and I can talk to you while you drive home. Anyway, I’m packing for my big move. Man, I haven’t been to New York in years. This will be fun.”
Oh my, does he think this is a vacation? I nervously thought to myself.
“Well, New York is just thirty minutes away from New Jersey. So there’s plenty to do in both states,” I replied.
“What’s wrong, babe? You sound off,” Toni inquired.
“Do I?” I pretended to be shocked by the question. “I’m just a little nervous. This is a big step we’re taking and I guess it just hit me.”
“I know, I know. After I got off the phone I was thinking, did I really just quit my job? I mean, I never done something like this before, and I felt bad telling Jonathan I was leaving.”
I felt bad because Jonathan told me on our drive to New York that he actually wanted Toni out of the house because he wanted to ask his girlfriend, Tawana, to move in with him to give their relationship a fresh start.
“What did Jonathan say when you told him you’re moving?” I asked Toni.
“He was fronting, I can tell, and was acting like he was cool, but I could tell he wasn’t happy, but he did wish us well.”
“Oh, okay, so what now? What’s your plan?” I asked.
“So I plan on leaving first thing tomorrow morning after a good night’s sleep.”
“Wow, did you pack everything already? What are you going to do with your things? Can everything fit in your car? Do you have to rent a truck or something?”
“Naw, I’m just grabbing a few things and I’m out. The furniture was Jonathan’s and all I really have is clothes and stuff.”
“Oh, okay,” I nervously said.
“Don’t be nervous,” Toni said, like he was reading my mind. “Everything will be alright. I’ll get settled and find a job in no time, and we can just enjoy our future.”
This was music to my ears; I was so glad he kind of had a plan.
“Thanks for the comforting words; that was helpful. I just got home and then I’m dead to the world.”
“Okay, babe, I got you, be safe and I’ll call or text you tomorrow when I get on the road.”
“Goodnight,” I said.
“Love you,” he said.
“Ditto.”
I Smiled at Myself and Embraced This New Relationship…
Ring, ring. “Hey, nig what’s up?”
“Hey, David, what’s up?”
“Good man, you lost my number or something? You haven’t called me in a minute.”
“My bad, David, I’ve been a little busy.”
“Your ass is always busy. That is the one thing I was feeling ’bout you.”
My mind was elsewhere that I couldn’t even joke around with David about him saying he was feeling me.
“I’m sorry, man, I promise I’ll try to keep in touch for real.”
“What’s up, man, you sound out of it. How is the new man?”
This was awkward because he never asked about Toni. It was awkward enough when I told him about Toni last month after I got back from my surprise trip to Atlanta. He called me and was upset when he heard I was in town and didn’t hit him up. I finally came clean to him and told him I was visiting someone new. I felt his whole tone changed after I told him that and, really, this was why we hadn’t spoken in a while.
“Toni is fine,” I hesitated to say.
“I would be lying if I said I was happy.”
“David, you stupid.”
“But real talk, why do you sound down?”
Beep, beep.
“Yo, I have to take this call; I’ll call you back.”
“You just avoiding my question, but you better call me back,” he insisted.
“I promise I’ll call you back.” Beep, beep. “Alright, I got to go, I’ll call you shortly.”
Beep, beep.
“Hey, babe, I’m in North Carolina and will be in Jersey in no tim
e. My guess is I’ll be in later tonight when you get off work. What time you getting off again?”
“I should be off by nine or nine thirty.”
“Perfect, maybe we can grab dinner when I get to your home. Man, that sounds crazy, but I guess your home is my new home.”
That statement had me all twisted. “I guess you’re right,” I nervously said. “But, babe, you know I don’t eat past like six p.m. if I can help it.”
“I know, but I figure since this is our first official night, you can bend your rules a little.”
He was right. “Sure, we can meet for dinner. I’m off tomorrow but may still be on call.”
“I am so excited. This is a new chapter in our lives. I have dreamt about this day for months now, and it’s finally going to happen in a matter of hours.”
“Well, babe, I have to go. Drive safe.”
“Love you,” he said.
“Ditto.” We both hung up.
I promised to call David back, but I really had to finish up some work first. I would call him during my lunch break after my lunch meeting, which was a working lunch because a small group of us ate while we discussed the day.
“Alright, guys, it’s a wrap, let’s break for lunch,” Vincent, the assistant director, yelled.
“Hey, David, I’ll call you in like twenty minutes after this meeting,” I texted David.
He quickly replied, “Bet,” as if he had the phone in his hand, waiting for me to call him.
Twenty minutes later, I called David as I began my afternoon lunchtime walk. I used this time to break away from the crazy production atmosphere and try to find some balance. I usually called Toni during this time, but I wanted to finish up my conversation with David.
“Hey, man, what’s up? Sorry for the delay in my return call.”
“I know, you was busy,” David said as if he was mocking me.
“Yes, I was busy. Remember, this is what you was feeling about me?” I mocked him back.
“Ha, ha, very funny. I’m on my lunch break, so good timing on the call, what’s up?” he said with excitement.
“Man, I’m good, can’t complain.”
“You sounded pretty down an hour or so ago, you alright? You know you can talk to me.”
I wished it was that easy, David and I went way back and I didn’t think it was right to talk to him about Toni even though I needed someone to talk to without judgment. I hadn’t even spoken to Angela as yet. She wouldn’t judge me, but I was just so afraid to call and talk to anyone because this was not like me. I didn’t even let guys I date come to my home let alone move in with me.
“Yo, J,” David yelled. “You good?”
“Yeah, I’m fine.”
“So what is the answer?” he asked.
“Answer?” I asked, sounding very confused.
“The answer to my question.”
“I’m sorry, what was the question?”
“When you coming back down to the A? You came last time and didn’t even look a nig up.”
“I feel you and I am sorry again; that was an unexpected and personal trip.”
“Yeah, yeah,” he said, cutting me off. “You came into town not to see me. I remember.”
“Don’t start, David. But I promise you, my next trip in town you’ll be the first one in the A to know.”
“I better,” he said, laughing.
“Alright, I got to go. Holla at you later.”
“You know you didn’t answer my other questions, but I’ll get some answers from you when you’re ready. I just want you to be happy, so call me anytime if you want to chat.”
“Thanks, I will one of these days. I’m still trying to sort some things out,” I said, and I hung up the phone and continued on my last lap around the block.
I really wished it had worked out with me and David, but some people were better off friends than lovers. David was a great guy and I still had feelings for him, but it was very hard being number two in his life to his son. Don’t get me wrong, his son was cool, but the baby-momma drama was not for me. His son’s mother was all over the place, she was so angry and bitter, and I could never understand why. They never got married and he never wanted to marry her. Maybe that was why she was bitter, but then she went and got married two years ago and still gave David heartache. I remember when he got a raise at work, she demanded more money for child support. I felt bad because David was a great dad and bought his son a lot of stuff and had him two times a month and every other holiday. I wasn’t a mother, nor did I have the desire to be one, so I guess I would never understand. This statement also never sat well with David, as he wanted more kids and I didn’t. He always said I would change my mind, but in the end, I didn’t think so. I also just didn’t like being number two to his son since he was always on standby, this is why he always said he was on daddy day care because he sometimes felt like a day care service the way his son’s mother treated him.
“Hey, babe, I’m on the turnpike and I believe I’m about an hour away from you.” I got a text from Toni.
My heart started beating fast; thank goodness I got off work fifteen minutes ago. I was heading home and just tried to calm down and stay positive. It would be all good, I kept reminding myself. Toni must have sensed my nerves and he called me fifteen minutes later.
“Hey, it’s nine p.m. What time you getting off work? I’m a hundred and twenty miles from Newark.”
“Wait, a hundred and twenty miles? I thought you said you were an hour away like twenty minutes ago. You’re still like two hours away.”
“Not the way I’m driving,” Toni joked.
“You be careful; those state troopers be all over the turnpike.”
“I’m trying to make it home in time to have dinner with my favorite person.”
“Babe, it’s already after nine and you may not be here until after ten maybe even eleven. I won’t be up for dinner around that time. Can we schedule breakfast, lunch and dinner for us tomorrow?”
“And for the rest of our lives,” Toni added.
If he’d said this very statement when he was in Atlanta, I would have been flattered, but when it was send via phone when he was less than two hours away, it freaked me out.
“I can’t wait to see you,” was all I could say.
“You okay, babe?” Toni asked.
“I’m good, just a little sleepy, I guess.”
“Oh, okay, I understand.”
“And my mom’s tripping because I haven’t yet been over to the new house to see how she’s doing.”
“Hey, did you tell your mom the good news?”
“Good news?” I said.
“Yeah, that I’m moving up to New Jersey so we can be together.”
“No, I didn’t get a chance to tell my mother. It’s late, so I may just tell her later.”
“That’s odd, I would think you would be telling everyone. Did you tell Angela?”
I wanted to lie and say I did, but I couldn’t. “No, I haven’t told her either. Babe, everything happened so fast, so I didn’t really have time to tell anyone yet. Jonathan has been calling me and I haven’t even had the time to call him back.”
“Yeah, everything did move fast,” he said, sounding disappointed. My guess was he told everyone he was moving to New Jersey. What’s not to tell? You have a career-driven girlfriend who owns her own home in New Jersey and you’re moving in with her with no job, no nothing besides the clothes in your car.
“Oh no,” I said as the thoughts got me scared again.
“You okay?” Toni asked with concern.
“I’m good, I have to run, but call me when you’re exiting the turnpike so I can give you directions to my house.”
“Okay, babe, see you soon.”
I just hung up. “What did I just get myself into?” I nervously asked myself. “Who just picks up their life with no job, no nothing and moves to a new state?” I figured a shower and a drink would help calm my nerves until he got here. One hour passed and I called T
oni to check on him.
“Hey, what’s up? How is everything going?” I said, trying not to sound nervous.
“I’m good, I’m about one hour away. Wait, there’s a sign now. It says ninety miles to Newark.”
“Wait, ninety miles? You was just at one hundred and twenty miles over an hour ago.”
“I figured since we wasn’t going to dinner, I stopped and grabbed something to eat.”
“Oh, okay.” That makes sense, I said to myself. “You better than me, I’m bad at driving at night.”
“I’m just listening to some Jack Johnson and cruising on this turnpike. You was right, I passed like ten state troopers so far; they don’t play.”
“Yeah, I know, welcome to New Jersey,” I jokingly said.
“So, what are you doing now? What are you wearing?”
“Believe it or not, I’m wearing some sweats and a kid’s wifebeater. Sorry, nothing exciting.”
“You look sexy in anything. I can’t wait to lie next to you in your sweats tonight.”
It also dawned on me, Toni and I never had sex before. We never really had the right moment. When we first met in Virginia, I wasn’t ready because we kind of just met. Then when I visited him in Atlanta, Jonathan was pretty much home the whole time and his messy room grossed me out so that it just wasn’t right. He never pressed me about it and he respected me since I like to move slow, never wanting to waste a number on a new guy if the relationship wasn’t going anywhere. But now that he was moving in, it would happen, which I was excited about. It’d been almost a year since David and I had sex, which was the last time I had sex.
“Thanks, babe,” I said.
“Babe, it’s going to be okay, I promise.” Again, Toni must have been reading my mind.
“I know, babe, but it’s still a little scary, you know?”
“At least we can be scared together.”
Those words calmed my nerves and Toni and I talked until he got to my doorstep.
“I’m here, where do I park?”
“Welcome to New Jersey, you’ll need to find street parking, and since it’s so late, ain’t no telling where you can park.”
Lust and Lies (The Jamie Reynolds Chronicles #1) Page 11
