by Mika Jolie
He didn’t breathe until he was in his Jeep. He dug in his pocket for his phone, tapped the name of the three men he considered brothers and texted.
Meet at Vapor in one hour.
Jason responded.
Already here. All three of us. Bring your sorry ass over.
Brows furrowed, he continued to study his phone. No text from Claire. Not that he was expecting one. Still his heart sank. Yeah, she had him by the balls. He threw the phone on the passenger seat and drove to catch the ferry over to the mainland. He had one more stop to make.
* * * *
Death welcomed Forrest as he entered the cemetery. Aside from the whispering wind amongst the trees, screeching silence awaited a trespasser. Moving further in, a fresh chill ran anew along his spine. He stuffed his hands in his sailor jacket as he passed people standing, crying and talking to departed loved ones.
He was here to the same thing.
He needed to talk to Luc and this was the only way. While his mind was still processing the turns his life had taken, the anger had subsided. He was here to let go. The proximity to his father’s frigid bones would close the gap between them for a moment. Ignoring the raw emotions that swelled inside him, he walked up to a slab of black granite and bent down to read the gold lettering at eye level. “For a while I was angry because I couldn’t accept you didn’t give me life, but you did. So did Charles and Mom. I’m lucky. I’m not angry anymore,” he said to the gravestone.
It stood there with its youthful glow, strong, erect, ready to last a hundred years or more. Yet his father had already perished and begun his inevitable decay. Something so permanent to mark something so transient.
“If anything,” Forrest continued. “I’m sad for you.” He ran a hand through his hair. “For Mom, Victoria, and Charles.” He exhaled. “But I’ve learned something from all of this. I am learning to let go. You’re right, it’s freeing.” He lifted his glasses and rubbed his eyes. “I will love and cherish you always, and I thank you for the unconditional love. I’ll be back to visit.”
Sucking in a deep breath, he rose to his feet and walked over to his Jeep.
About twenty minutes later, Forrest entered Vapor. He spotted the other three guys right away and headed to the table. Blake shoved a beer in front of him.
“Here,” he said, “We figured you were pissy.”
“Why am I pissy?”
“Claire dumped you.” This came from Adam.
“Claire didn’t dump me.”
“So why isn’t she back with you?” Blake asked then took a sip of his beer. “According to the tweet Keely sent to me, it turned out she’s dating her co-star.”
“I thought it was Rafa,” Adam added.
Rafa was Lily’s brother who flirted openly with Claire when they met. Forrest groaned. “Claire is in Seattle for work.”
Blake slid his phone in front of Forrest. “We know. You haven’t seen this picture.”
Forrest glanced at the screen and was greeted by a picture of Claire with her co-star’s arm around her waist, a smile on her lips. Not the smile she had for him, he thought. He pushed the phone back to Blake. “So you guys decided to make me feel better.”
Jason who had been silent took a chug of his beer. “Did you guys break up?”
“No.” He swallowed a gulp of the beer and shook his head. “I really didn’t think men have these sessions.” He tilted his head in Adam’s direction. “Well, he needed one a few months ago.”
Adam flipped him the bird.
“You all cornered me when I became a pothead,” Jason added.
“And drank too much,” Blake added.
“And slept with too many women,” Forrest reminded his friend, his brother.
All three of them looked at him.
“Yes, that is wrong too,” Forrest said. “If a woman does the same thing, it…”
Adam put his hands up. “Oh please stop we know…no need for the fucking lecture.”
Forrest shrugged, but smiled. “Just sayin’.”
“Duly noted.” Adam groaned.
Forrest laughed because Adam had morals, strong family values, and worshipped Lily. Good to see with all of that his friend’s edge hadn’t diminished.
“So what’s the issue?” Jason asked. “Why are you here and not wherever the hell she is?”
“You seem to forget I work.”
His friends scoffed.
“I have patients to see,” he said firmly.
“I’m sure your list of sick patients,” Blake said, quoting the word sick with his fingers, “will dwindle now that you are in a serious relationship.”
“How many appointments do you have tomorrow or this week?” Jason continued to barrage him with questions.
Maybe two, but to answer them would be wasted breath. “And the farm,” he said instead.
“You have a full-time staff,” Jason pointed out.
Forrest really wished they weren’t brothers. And for fuck’s sake, he was older by three whole months. “I think I’m smart enough to get your point.”
Adam chuckled, clearly enjoying the fact the tables had turned and he was no longer the one getting cannonade.
“Claire will balance her schedule once this madness is over,” Jason continued, as if he hadn’t heard a word spoken by Forrest. “These obligations were made before you.” He looked at Forrest. “You know that’s how she dealt with not having you in her life.”
Forrest placed his glasses on the table and scrubbed his face. “I got it.”
“So you’ll wait for her?” Jason asked.
“What the fuck. Who is more invested in this, you or me?”
Blake and Adam snickered.
“You and I both know how long I’ve loved her.”
“Good. I’m glad you remembered.” Jason smiled, seeming pleased. “Now don’t fuck it up.”
“When am I known to fuck up?”
All three fuckers stayed mute.
Okay, so he kind of messed shit up with Jason, and maybe he could have gone after Claire after she left and demanded an explanation, but that one could go either way. “I fucked up once and now we are talking again.”
Jason snorted. “I’m sure there’s more. I’ll think about it.”
Blake’s phone dinged on the table. He looked at it and frowned.
“What’s up?” Forrest asked his friend.
“My parents.”
All three men sat a little straighter.
“It’s time to send them money again,” Blake continued and picked up his phone.
“Where are they nowadays?” Adam asked.
“England,” Blake answered casually.
“Do they know you’re back on the island?” Adam asked, chugging his beer.
“Nope.”
Forrest wasn’t fooled by his friend’s unconcerned tone, and he guessed none of the others were either. Hell the whole island was well-versed on Blake’s parents, but this was one of the few topics on the Do Not Discuss list. “Because…” Forrest said carefully.
“Because if they find out, they’ll be here breathing down my neck and driving me bat shit crazy. You all know I ran off as soon as I was able to. I don’t want them here.”
Neither of them said a word. They picked up their beer and quietly drank.
By the time Forrest entered his house, it was dark. And he was tired…a good thing because that meant it’d be easy for him to pass out.
After he showered, he realized he had two text messages from Claire.
Doc, thought you might be available to chat. Heading to Wisconsin tomorrow for three days. Say you’ll meet me. Miss those sexy glasses of yours. BTW, check your suit pocket. Left you a key. Come by whenever.
The other text was shorter and to the point.
I love you.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
“Home is where the heart is.”
Anonymous
For a decade happiness had been an elusive shadow for Claire. Now finally within r
each, she had no intention of letting it slip through her fingers. Sitting on the terrace of the open air Japanese restaurant on Rodeo Drive, she examined the crowd. Everyone looked to be in good spirits. Excitement radiated from their faces. They smiled and laughed with ease. They hugged hello and again for goodbye. They talked rapidly, gesturing with their hands while drinking wine or a cocktail.
Why not her?
Until the night of her eighteenth birthday, her childhood had been happy. Her life on the island had been happy. Her relationship with Forrest had made her happy.
She breathed in the early spring air and welcomed the relaxed atmosphere. Just in time. Two weeks of non-stop action had taken its toll on her physically and mentally. The only reason she made this one-day pit stop in L.A. was to meet with her manager before flying on to New York.
She needed sleep. Desperately so. Not a power nap either. Only the state where her nervous system was relatively inactive, postural muscles relaxed, and consciousness practically suspended could possibly get rid of her deep despondency.
Maybe in her own bed, she’d be able to get a good night’s rest. It had evaded her so far. In the inkiness, she’d tossed and turned, never able to find the right position. A lingering haze of sleep hovered somewhere at the back of her mind but always too far away to reach, floating in the pool of memories.
She missed her family. She missed her friends. She missed the island. But most of all, she missed Forrest, his kisses, his face, the way he smiled.
They talked regularly, even managed a routine. They called, sent text messages, and emails. But what she craved the most remained out of reach–that deep physical and emotional union that only happened when two people touched. It didn’t even have to be sexual. Holding hands, tucked in his arms. Whatever. Anything. She ached for it.
Here and there during a late night conversation, they talked about possibly connecting midway or at one of the places she was scheduled to make an appearance. Those plans fell into a yawning black hole and never came to fruition. Mostly on her part, because her daily itinerary barely left room to sit down and enjoy a decent meal.
To think, the grueling schedule was not even at its end. After the promotional tour came the movie premiere in the U.S. and overseas. That in itself consisted of another whirlwind of traveling. But the madness should be shorter. By the end of the month or maybe summer, she should be free to go back to the island.
Back home.
Back to Forrest.
The movie had already garnered a positive buzz. Her fans were eager to see her stretch her wings. This was her big break as an actress. She should be walking on air instead of feeling so down in the dumps. Problem was what once filled her with excitement now left a void in her life.
She waved at James as he entered the restaurant. After hugs and a quick update on his children, he slid a thick envelope across the table to her. She eyed the package then her manager. “What’s this?”
“Another script for you to read to see if you’re interested.” His tone was casual and warm, without any pressure. “If yes, then you’d start filming in the fall.”
She took a sip of her wine, sat there and listened to her manager go on about meetings and filming sessions. Something shriveled inside and her stomach knotted. “I’m not interested, James.”
He stopped, leaned back in his chair and appraised her. Then he smiled. “It’s time?”
She had everything she ever wanted. A thriving career. A big bank account. Fame. For ten years she told herself those things, although superficial, were sufficient. They validated her. She should be ecstatic. Actually, for a while she’d managed to persuade herself she had been. But after returning to the island and reconnecting with Forrest, everything had shifted.
She yearned to be someone’s permanence. And that person was back on the Vineyard. It took ten years to stop running and accept what her heart wished for. Family, friends, and Forrest.
Always Forrest.
He was her home.
“All of this means nothing if Forrest is not in my life.”
“As your manager, I’m supposed to make you aware of any opportunity that is presented to you.”
James had always looked out for her; she had no doubt he’d continue to do so. “I know and I love you for that.”
He took the envelope and put it back in his messenger bag. “But I’m glad you’ve decided to pass on this.”
The waiter approached their table. After a quick polite exchange ensuring their needs were met, he took their order and left.
“For now,” she went back to the reason she’d requested to meet with James. “I’d like to only focus on my music. That’s my passion.”
“What about the touring?”
That part she hadn’t figured out yet. “I don’t want to spend months on the road anymore.” That piece she was sure of. “Maybe a few concerts here and there.”
Concern touched James’ face. She understood it. Out of sight meant out of mind. Fans were fickle that way. To stay relevant she had to stay current and worth seeing. Once upon a time consumed by the need to prove her self-worth to the Victorias, and even to herself, might have steered her decision, but not anymore.
Luckily, that Claire, the person with the doubts, and daddy issues had found peace of mind. “I love my career,” she said with conviction because it was true. “But I don’t really care if I become yesterday’s news. There are other things I want and a man I want those things with.”
“Listen, Claire,” James said after a long, hard stare. “You’re allowed to take a break or slow down. For ten years you’ve been going non-stop. You don’t need the money.” He signed the check and pushed his chair back. “I know Ava is stopping by later to bring some documents to you. Should I have her bring your flight information?”
“I already have it.”
James arched a brow. He knew her well enough to know she had something up her sleeve.
“I take it you’re stopping somewhere.”
A smile touched her lips. “I’m going home.”
* * * *
Claire zipped her overnight bag while humming the tune of Tattooed Hearts. It was recently released for air play, and climbing several charts, even sitting at number one in several categories. The tune was catchy in that elegantly minimalist approach with only her vocals, the guitar and the piano. It made sense that her best song yet was written about Forrest. The thought made her grin.
Tomorrow they’d reunite. Her insides vibrated with joy. Unable to stand still, she moved about the bedroom and picked up her phone. She started formulating a text to share her pending arrival with Forrest then stopped.
To surprise or not to surprise? Forrest hated to be caught off guard. She could see his handsome face. Pinched brow, eyes sharp behind his glasses, the chiseled lines of his mouth edged up in a half-smile.
Surprise him it was going to be.
A buzzing sound came from the speaker announcing she had a guest arriving. She checked her watch. Ava was due to arrive. Claire threw the phone on the bed, bit down a smile and headed to the living room and came to a screeching halt. Her heartbeat raged out of control at the sight before her.
Forrest.
He stood still for her inspection. His intense stare allowed her to take him in before a full-face smile deepened the creases around his eyes. “I owe you a date.”
Surprised into speechlessness, she watched as he stepped inside her apartment. All six-foot-three of him in a relaxed wardrobe that never renounced his elegance. Faded jeans, black crew neck tee and a black bomber jacket, his dark hair tucked under a low crown, torn and tattered Boston Red Sox baseball cap, and an overnight bag slung over his shoulder.
He looked so delicious.
Her heart ached suddenly because she’d miss seeing him every day and every night. Unable to contain herself, she ran to him. He dropped the bag and wrapped his arms around her waist. He pulled her tight as if she were the most precious thing in his life, as if he couldn’t
wait another day, another second, to touch her.
She loved the feeling.
She held on. Butterflies did a crazy bounced low in her belly. He feels so good. “I love you,” she breathed, the air from her lungs stolen by the moment.
“Forever,” he said, his mouth touching her earlobe.
It wasn’t a question, but she answered anyway. “Yes. Infinitely.”
He gave her one last squeeze and then he kissed her with a passion that took her breath away. When they finally broke for air, he led her to the sofa.
“I was going to come to you tomorrow,” she said, heart still pounding so fast it threatened to burst out from her chest.
“Oh yeah?” He looked surprised. Pleased.
Claire nodded. “A quick stop on my way to New York.”
There was a slight quirk at the corners of his mouth. “Now you don’t have to.” He smoothed back her hair and held her gaze. “I’m going with you.” He wasn’t asking for permission. He was letting her know his intention.
She blinked. Martha’s Vineyard was his home. He loved his house, the lake. “That’s three months on the road.”
Forrest smiled. His thumbs caressed her cheeks. “You’re my base.”
Her heart was officially at stroke level. To make sure, she didn’t pass out, she held on to him. “What?”
“I know I said the island was my home before I left, but I was wrong. You’re my home, Claire.”
Goosebumps covered her skin. Her heart squeezed tight, so damn tight she was bereft of speech.
A wrinkle appeared between his brows as he studied her for a beat. “This is a bit sudden,” he said quietly. “I understand if you need time.”
