This book is copyrighted by author Gianni Holmes. No part of this book may be distributed without the expressed consent of the owner. Such requests to author must be sent to email [email protected]. This book is purely a figment of the writer’s imagination. Any likeness to events or people are coincidental in nature.
GH
DEDICATION
To all the fearless teachers everywhere in the world like Beau, who struggle to perform their duties and fulfill their vocation because they identify with the LGBTQ community.
Special thanks to Barb Ingram, the founder of Another Set of Eyes. She worked tirelessly with me to ensure my book was polished for its release and I’ll never cease singing her praises and telling her thanks.
To Nina Storey, thanks for the beautiful song you wrote and recorded specially for these two men, Gordon and Beau.
Finally, to my loyal fans, Gianni’s Firsts. Thanks for your enthusiasm over my work.
GH
Easy does it twice
Gianni Holmes
Prologue
Gordon
“Mom! Mom!”
I winced at the sound of my fourteen-year-old daughter, yelling for her mother as she slammed the car door shut. Normally I would chastise her for the force with which she closed the door, but I understood her excitement. This year had been a rocky one for our family. When I had bundled her and my seventeen-year-old son, Ollie into the car, heading for the New Orleans Mardi Gras celebration, they had accompanied me with great reluctance. It hadn’t helped that my wife, Barbara had decided not to travel with us at the last moment. As soon as we had arrived at the celebration, the kids had transformed, and we’d had a fantastic time. I hadn’t heard them laugh so much in a long time. It had felt damn refreshing.
“This was a great weekend, wasn’t it?” I asked my son as we got out of the car at a slower pace than my daughter.
Ollie nodded, his eyes glinting with excitement but which he would not show with as much exuberance as his younger sister. At his age, he had this thing about acting cool and staying in character. Even though his shrug was nonchalant, the gleam in his eyes was a telltale sign of how much he had enjoyed himself.
“It was cool,” he answered, and I restrained myself from ruffling his blond hair, so like my own. “I’m glad you talked us into going.”
“Yeah, it was great fun,” I agreed. Despite the problems that existed in my relationship with Barbara, I loved my kids more than life. Having them spend the weekend with just me had been an extraordinary bonding experience for us. I would have to remember to do it again sometime in the future. Only the two of us without Barbara, who would whine the fun out of everybody.
I opened my mouth to ask Ollie to grab two of the bags from the trunk, but the words never left my mouth. A bloodcurdling scream rented the air and raised the hairs at the back of my neck. Charlie! The sound wasn’t her usual girlish shriek when she was speaking to her best friend about some boy who noticed her. The scream was terrifying and went on as though it wouldn’t stop.
“Charlie!” I shouted her name and broke into a run for the house. As fast as Ollie was, he couldn’t outrun me. The need to find my baby girl and protect her from whatever distressed her propelled me inside the house. I took the stairs two at a time, yelling her name. “Charlie!”
I followed the sound of her gut-wrenching wails, past her bedroom and to the one I shared with their mother. I halted just inside the door and stared in confusion at the sight before me. She sat on the floor with the lifeless body of her mother clutched in her arms. On the bed were bottles of pills, uncapped, overturned, and empty. The phone was off its hook, as though in the last minute she had been trying to call someone.
“Oh my God, Barb!” I cried and flew towards the pair on the floor. I dropped to my knees and with trembling arms pressed my hands to her chest. No heartbeat. “No! No! No, Barbara! Oh God, no!” I touched her neck to feel for her pulse with shaky hands. She was cold. She must have been like this for a long time. She had been dead long enough for the body heat to have left her.
Sick to the stomach at what we had walked into, I released the body of my wife and reached for my daughter, who was crying and rocking back and forth. “Mom, please wake up. Mom, please!” Tears pricked my eyes to see her heartbroken, a girl abandoned by a mother who didn’t love her enough to stay and live.
“Charlie. Charlie, honey, let go.” I tried to pry her arms away, but she refused to let go.
“No, no! Daddy, wake her up! Please, wake her up!”
Pain lanced my heart at her cry. I heard a sob and glanced up to see Ollie. He hadn’t moved from the doorway but looked on in shock. His shoulders were shaking with the effort to try and contain his tears, to keep his composure. Tears burned my eyes, but I blinked them away. I was the parent. I couldn’t break down now. There would be time enough to grieve later. I was all they had now. They needed me.
“Come on, baby. Let go.” She fought me tooth and nail while I worked her arms from around the lifeless body.
“Please, daddy. Please.” Every cry of hers for me to do something weighed on my heart. Why Barbara? Why? You know they need you. They love you. We could have worked this out. Guilt ate at me, as I remembered the last conversation we had before the kids and I left home. I’d thought it was a rational conversation since she had offered no objection to us getting a divorce. Now I knew why.
I finally hauled Charlie away from the body, and she collapsed into my arms, crying. I hugged her to me tight, squeezing her to offer my comfort in the passing of a mother who had left her way too soon.
“Ollie, take your sister and go sit in the car,” I said, walking Charlie over to her brother. She clung to me, refusing to let go. “Charlie, honey, go with your brother. Please. Let me call the police.”
Ollie looked relieved to leave the room that had stripped him bare of any innocence he might have had left. He had just seen the sight of his mother, who had taken her own life. Fucking hell, I couldn’t imagine what was going through his mind. I was reeling with the shock of it all. When I was sure they had left, I ran my fingers through my hair, gripping the strands as I stared at the body once more.
I pulled the sheet from the bed and covered her because if I looked at her lying there much longer, I would have hurled. I staggered over to the phone and dialed the number of the only person I could think of calling. He answered on the third ring.
“Gordon, my man. What’s up? How was New Orleans?”
“New Orleans was fine,” I answered, choking up as I tried to form the words.
“What’s the matter? You sound—”
“It’s Barb,” I cried, hot tears finally spilling down my face. “She’s dead.”
Chapter 1
Gordon
“Gordon.”
I glanced up from my computer at the office secretary, Glenna who poked her head through the door she had cracked open. I indicated to her that I was on the phone.
“It’s an emergency,” she said in hushed tones. “Lacovia Academy is on the line.”
“Shit,” I muttered.
“Excuse me?” my client asked from the other end of the line.
“Uh, Mr. Roberts, sorry about that,” I said, closing my eyes. “An emergency just came up, and I have to go. I’ll ring you as soon as I can.”
“Alright then. Don’t disappoint, Gordon. I’ll be waiting for your call.”
I hung up and sighed in frustration. “What did Ollie do this time?”
She shrugged. “I didn’t ask. The principal just asked for you directly.”
“Okay. You can transfer the call.”
She nodde
d, her eyes full of compassion and I glanced away. Ten months after Barbara killed herself, people still gave me a pitying look. At least it was better than the way her mother and sister leveled accusing eyes at me. They insisted I had done something to drive their daughter to take her own life.
The phone on my desk rang, and I snatched it up. “This is Gordon, speaking.”
“Gordon, this is Principal McLean.”
“How are you doing, Jackson?” I asked the man who had been in high school with me, though he had been a year ahead. My kids couldn’t catch a break at that school. Each time they did something wrong, I received a call from the principal’s office, as was the case in such a small town like Lacovia, where everybody knew everybody’s business. Before their mother’s death, our kids had been well-behaved within reason, certainly no worse than other kids. Now Ollie was breaking rules I didn’t even know the school had.
“Trying to run a school over here,” Jackson answered. “But, your boy’s making it increasingly difficult to do so.”
“What’d he do this time?”
“He showed up at school this morning, but he decided to skip out.”
Again. He had skipped school for the fourth time since the month started. “This is a difficult time for him—”
“I know. I know.” He cut me off. “His mother killed herself, and he’s going through a tough time. I get it, but he needs to understand that life will not wait for him to catch up. You have him back here in my office in an hour, or I’m going to have to suspend him for five days.”
“Five days! He’s almost at the end of high school. He’s been a great kid up until this moment.”
“Hardly great but given his situation, I’m giving you an hour to bring him in.” A click sounded in my ear as he hung up.
“Son of a bitch,” I gritted out. I swore when I got my hands on Ollie I’d— I lost my steam when I thought about him and all he had endured these past months. I worried about him, my beautiful boy who had been deprived of a mother in a devastating manner. He never talked about it, and to the best of my knowledge, he had not cried since the day we found Barbara’s body. Charlie had been the opposite, crying every minute. She had become withdrawn, creating a shell that kept even her friends at bay. At one point, I had to send her away for a week to stay with my mother who lived an hour and a half away in Baton Rouge, so she didn’t have to be around the memories every minute.
Grabbing my denim jacket, I shrugged into it, checking the pockets that I had my cellphone and wallet on me. I palmed my car keys from the desk and stormed from the office. Maybe I had been too easy on Ollie, making excuses for him because his mother died. His behavior was becoming too much to handle, and we had to do something about it once and for all.
“Glenna, I’ll be out probably for the rest of the evening,” I said, stopping by her desk. “Ensure the guys complete their logs before they leave, will you? Especially Red.”
“Okay, boss.”
“I’ll send them a reminder in our group chat just to be on the safe side. Now let’s hope I find this kid within an hour.”
“Good luck.”
I smiled at her even though I didn’t feel like it, but because she had been a rock for me after Barb’s death. I didn’t regret taking on the fifty-year-old woman since I started this business five years ago. I’d taken a chance on her at that age, and she hadn’t disappointed. She was exactly what the office needed when the men got a little carried away with their sexist conversations. She acted more like a mother to everyone than just a secretary.
Once I was out the office, I headed for my Dodge. I racked my brain to think of where I could find Ollie at this time of the day. It was just some minutes after twelve. Who knew how long he had ditched classes? I reached into my pocket, withdrew my phone and dialed my best friend’s number as I drove out of the company’s parking lot.
“Gordon, what’s up?” Eric answered on the second ring. “Everybody okay?” Since I’d called him that day we found Barbara, he asked that question each time I rang him. I hated that he was anticipating something else going wrong.
“Ollie is missing from school again,” I answered. “Jackson wants to suspend him if we don’t show up at his office within the next hour. Make that fifty minutes. I don’t even have a clue where to look.”
“I can’t report him missing,” Eric responded. “But I’ll have the guys keep a lookout for him. I’ll also take a tour through the mall. Have any other idea where he might be?”
“I wish to God I did.”
“Did you try his phone?”
“Fuck. I didn’t even think about that. I’ll call him now although I doubt he’ll answer if he’s skipping class.”
“Try. You never know. Let’s hope he’s alright.”
“I don’t know, Eric. The kid’s not been the same since his mother died. I worry about him.”
“He’ll be fine. He’s a good kid at heart. Just a little fucked up at the moment. We’ll get him back.”
“Okay. Keep me updated.”
I hung up and at the stoplight punched in the speed dial number to call Ollie. His phone rang to voicemail. I kept calling him but had no luck reaching him. Frustrated, I threw the phone onto the dashboard and began my search.
***
I spent almost thirty minutes driving all over town and working myself into a frenzy. I went from keeping back tears of desperation to swearing I’d knock some sense into Ollie when I found him. He couldn’t be gone forever. I was never one to spank the kids, but as those minutes ticked by and drew closer to the hour, I understood why some parents found it easy.
I was out of ideas where next to look. I’d stopped by all the kids’ favorite jaunting spots. There wasn’t much to do in Lacovia anyway. It was just a small town with around five hundred citizens. I’d been disturbed at the number of kids who skipped classes. I never thought one of my own would be in the mix.
I was heading for the school alone, to plead with Jackson not to suspend Ollie, when my phone rang. I grabbed it from the dashboard, believing it was Ollie returning my call. It was Eric.
“Did you find him?” I asked on a rush. “I hope you did because I didn’t. I’m heading over to the school now to talk to Jackson.”
“I’ve got him,” Eric replied.
“Thank God!” I almost let go the steering wheel in relief. “Put him on the phone.”
“Not yet,” he answered. “I’ll give you two some time to cool off. I’m close to the school, so I’ll meet you there.”
“Fine.” When he didn’t hang up, I had the feeling that something else was wrong. “What aren’t you telling me?”
“I found him because we received a complaint about a kid shoplifting,” he answered. “Turned out to be Ollie and some girl he skipped class with.”
“He did what?” I shouted into the phone, my face turning red. “Why would he do something so stupid? He’s not in need of anything.”
“Kids shoplift to stay cool more than because they can’t afford it,” he replied. “I thought you’d want that information to sink in before we meet up with you. Go easy on him, Gordon.”
I hung up the phone and threw the phone to the dashboard. Disappointment took root inside me. I resented Barbara at that moment. I never understood why she took her own life, but the kids were suffering so much from it. She had to have known how much they loved her and how much pain they would be left to deal with.
Ollie had never been the golden angel, even as a child. He was always precocious, but in the way normal kids were. He would break curfew a time or two, but he didn’t do things like shoplifting. I had to get to the bottom of this. Otherwise, he would probably end up in prison. He wasn’t too young for them to try him as an adult if he continued making these stupid mistakes. Maybe I should have never allowed him to miss those grief counseling sessions, but I hadn’t wanted to push.
When I drove up to the school, I lost my steam when I saw Ollie standing with Eric who was dressed in his police un
iform. Eric had his hand placed on Ollie’s shoulder, and the boy had his head bowed. I stared at him and remembered him at eighteen months, waddling his way to me with his toothy, drooling grin. My heart squeezed, and as I parked, I closed my eyes briefly to calm down. Railing at him would solve nothing. I’d done that the last time he skipped school, and it had just spurred an argument between us. Maybe this time I should try the softer approach, although I believed I’d exhausted that too.
I parked and climbed out of the truck, slamming the door shut with a little bit more force than necessary. Whatever Eric said to Ollie, the boy nodded but still hung his head. I stopped before the two and didn’t know what to say. So many thoughts had run through my mind while I combed the streets looking for him, but now that I saw him, not one made sense.
“Thanks for the help,” I told Eric because it was easier to talk to him than my own son, and that fucking killed me.
“No problem.” Eric slapped me on the shoulder and squeezed tightly. “Remember, go easy on him. I took care of the owner of the store, but everyone won’t be so quick not to press charges the next time.”
“There won’t be a next time.” I thanked him and watched him swagger to his squad car. He drove away, honking his horn at us.
“Listen to your father, son,” he said in parting.
Left alone, I turned to Ollie, passing a hand over my face and behind my neck. “Why?” I asked him. “Why would you do something so stupid and reckless, Ollie?”
He shuffled his feet around without a response. That only made me angry. For the first time in my life, I had the urge to strike my son, and it scared me because if he didn’t change his attitude, I indeed might. I had no intention of hitting him, but a man could only take so much. It hurt to see my son turning into a stranger, a loner on a highway to self-destruction. It hurt more that I didn’t know how to stop it. I felt powerless and weak.
“I’m trying my best here,” I told him, choking out the words beyond the lump in my throat. When he still refused to look at me, I grabbed him by the shoulders. “Look at me when I’m talking to you.” He glanced up then, his eyes full of unshed tears— tears I wished he would cry for his mother. A second after, his head lowered again. “I’m trying my goddamn best here. I know you’re hurting. I swear I do. Every day I have to live with the knowledge that I couldn’t protect you or Charlie from seeing your mother just-just...” I trailed off, blinking rapidly to keep the tears at bay. “I don’t know what else to do, Ollie so if there’s something I’m doing that’s wrong, if I am failing you, if there’s something else that you would respond better to, let me know, but I can’t help you if you don’t speak to me.”
Easy Does It Twice (Till There Was You Book 1) Page 1
