“How are you going to explain your visit to her?” asked Anita. When Sheila remained silent, she patted her arm. “Do you want me to go with you?”
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Shaking her head, Sheila started moving toward the walkway that wound around the side of the house and to the front portico. “This is something I have to do on my own. It may be too little too late, but maybe I can help Isha in some small way.”
“At least give me a ring later and tell me what happened, all right?”
“Okay. And remember, don’t say one word about this to anyone.”
“I won’t.”
Sheila slid behind the wheel of her car. Good thing she’d driven herself and not arrived in the chauffeured car. She had to do this stealthily. Now that she had a way to perhaps track down Isha, she was going to try and make it up to her.
She sat in the car for a minute or two, deliberating. How would Baba and Ayee react if they found out what she’d just discovered? Could it be possible they already knew about Isha? But then, they would have said something if they had.
Even now, as she sat with her fingers drumming the steering wheel, she wondered if seeking out Isha would mean alienating Ayee and Baba. They could end up severing all ties with her if they found her doing something they viewed as disloyalty to them.
That would mean her own sons would be cut off from their grandparents, too. Was all that worth risking?
After a moment of contemplation she realized her answer was a resounding yes.
Reaching out to one’s family was the right thing to do, even if her parents disagreed. She owed it to her dead brother to offer help to his wife and child. By now it could be two children.
How was Isha providing for them? She had no money of her own. Every bit of her late father’s estate had gone toward her terminally ill mother’s expensive medical care. For Isha it had been one major tragedy after another since her father’s death six years ago. How much more could the poor woman take?
Sheila started the car and began driving in the direction of the convent. But there were a couple of important stops she had to make before she got there.
Chapter 11
Aknock on the door made Isha look at the clock. It was not even close to lunchtime, so it couldn’t be Priya. Besides, Priya generally yelled “Mummy.”
Putting aside Priya’s uniform that she’d been mending, she rose from her chair to open the door. Her jaw fell. “Sheila!”
“Isha!” For some reason Sheila seemed equally astonished.
“I—I hope you don’t mind my coming here?”
At a loss for words, Isha stared at her for a moment. “No . . .
no. Please come in.” She noticed Mother Regina standing right behind Sheila, a censorious frown on her pale face. “Praised be Jesus and Mary, Mother,” she said quickly, silently reprimand -
ing herself for not saying it sooner.
“Forever. I hope you don’t mind my allowing your sister-in-law to visit. I know you told me you did not want to have anything to do with your family.” The nun inclined her head toward Sheila. “She was persistent, you know. She refused to leave until she saw you.”
Isha smiled at the clearly incensed nun. “That’s all right, Mother. Sheila and I have a good relationship.”
Seemingly satisfied, Mother Regina took her leave, but not before she threw Sheila a disapproving glare generally reserved for recalcitrant children. “I shall leave you two alone, then.”
Closing the door behind the old woman, Isha turned to Sheila. “I’m sorry about Mother Regina’s attitude. She’s only trying to protect me.”
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“I know. Don’t forget I used to be a student of hers, too.
When she clapped her hands to get our attention, it sounded like a cannon exploding in the corridors. Scared me to death in those days!”
“Me, too,” Isha said with a shudder.
“She’s still the old battleaxe, but she doesn’t scare me anymore,” said Sheila. “I even managed to break down her defenses.”
“I never thought you’d be called persistent. You’re usually so agreeable.”
“I can be just as tenacious as Mother Regina when I need to be,” Sheila admitted with a mischievous gleam in her eyes. They were so like Nikhil’s eyes that Isha felt a sharp stab of pain.
Then Sheila dropped her purse and a large plastic bag she’d been carrying and opened her arms wide to give Isha a hug.
Isha fell into her sister-in-law’s arms. “Oh, Sheila!” The tears were already building up. “It’s so nice to see you.” She was probably ruining Sheila’s cool and perfect chiffon sari in a warm shade of peach, but she didn’t care. Her sister-in-law was such a welcome sight after the past few months of seclusion.
“Shh . . . it’s okay.” Sheila caught her close. She was taller and bigger-boned than Isha and held her like a child. “It’s wonderful to see you, too.” She abruptly stepped back and stared.
“Your tummy’s gone! You had the baby?”
Isha nodded and pointed to the bundle sleeping on the cot.
“Three days ago.”
Sheila turned to the baby and peered at the little face. “Oh my God!” She gazed at the baby for a long time, her eyes filling up. “She looks so much like Niku,” she whispered, reminding Isha that Sheila was the only one in the family who referred to Nikhil as Niku. She sniffed and pulled out a handkerchief from her purse. “The same chin and cheekbones. Does she have his eyes, too?”
Isha wiped away her own tears with her fingers. “Yes. Those beautiful trademark ghaaré dolé— gray-green eyes—that you and Nikhil inherited from your mother seem to be very domi-THE
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nant. I’m glad both my children look like Nikhil. They’re his only legacy I have left.”
“What did you name her?”
“Diya.”
“Lovely name,” said Sheila. “And it suits her.”
“I think so.” Isha smiled as she recalled something. “Remember, right after Nikhil passed away, when I used to leave Priya with Sundari and go for those long walks to avoid facing your parents? I often went to the Ganesh temple.”
“I remember.”
“You know that sadhu who sits outside the temple, the one they say is a prophet?”
“Uh-huh. He seems to be meditating all the time.”
“He surprised me one day by starting a conversation with me.”
Sheila lifted a single eyebrow. “Interesting.”
“All of a sudden he said some things that astounded me. He seemed to know I was newly widowed and that my in-laws were adamant about my aborting my child.”
“How do you suppose he knew? The servants told him?”
Isha shrugged. “God knows. But he said my daughter would be born at full moon, Kojagari Purnima to be precise, and that she would bring light to the people around her.”
“He even knew you were going to have a daughter?” Sheila was silent for a moment. “That’s amazing.” She turned to Isha, her eyes wide. “She was born three days ago. So that’s . . . the exact day!”
“And the name Nikhil and I had been thinking about fits her perfectly.” Realizing they were still standing, Isha gestured to Sheila to sit down.
“Maybe that old man really is an oracle.” Sheila sat down on the cot next to the baby and looked around, wondering how her sister-in-law, who was used to living in a large and luxurious home, could live in this dark, musty hole with barely enough room to walk four steps in any direction. “Isha, I had no idea you were still in Palgaum. I wish you’d contacted me.”
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“I didn’t want anyone to know. You know why, don’t you?”
Nodding slowly, Sheila once again gazed at the baby. “I know. Ayee and Baba would have forced you to get rid of the baby, even if it was too late in the pregnancy.”
“That’s only one of the reasons for my decision to leave them.” Isha
settled herself in the chair, wondering if she should tell Sheila everything. She hadn’t told this to a soul other than Mother Regina. After a second of deliberating, she decided to open up. Sheila had to know how rotten her parents were, even if it hurt her deeply. “They kept blaming Diya and me for Nikhil’s death.”
“I know that,” Sheila admitted. “And I could never understand why.”
“Don’t forget, I was the daughter-in-law who produced girls, so my reputation went bad years ago. But Ayee kept saying Diya, too, was a symbol of abshakoon. Bad luck. First of all, she was a girl, and that in itself was a curse. Ayee felt that God was trying to warn us that this child would bring the family a lot of grief. She believes that if I’d had an abortion, Nikhil would be alive today.”
“Oh, dear Lord!” Sheila bowed her head and put her face in her hands.
The simple gesture seemed so hopeless and dejected that it broke Isha’s heart to be the one to give her sister-in-law the news.
Sheila looked up, her face a picture of misery. “If they weren’t my parents, I think I’d have them arrested.”
Isha couldn’t help smiling. “Arrested for what? For believing in something hopelessly primitive and entirely illogical?”
The baby woke up just then and interrupted them. Sheila held up a hand. “Don’t get up,” she said to Isha. “I want to hold her.” Very gently she picked up the baby and studied her face.
“Hey, baby, you recognize me? I’m your Sheila-tayi,” she said, using the same term Priya used to address her. Although tayi was the word for big sister, in their Maharashtrian culture one’s father’s sister was also called tayi. She glanced at Isha. “She’s beautiful. I’m so glad you let her come into this world.”
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“I wouldn’t have had it any other way. I don’t care what Ayee and Baba have to say, but to Nikhil and me she’d always been our child.”
The baby went quiet for a moment from being picked up, but started to fuss again, letting them know she was hungry. Sheila rose to her feet and placed her in Isha’s arms. “She’s not going to calm down till she’s fed. Why don’t we talk while you nurse her?”
So the two women chatted while the baby happily nursed at Isha’s breast. “Sheila, can I ask you something personal?”
“Sure. We’re sisters-in-law, aren’t we?” asked Sheila quietly.
“Did your parents treat you the way they did Priya because you were a girl?”
Sheila took a deep breath and stared at the crucifix on the wall for a minute. She looked like she was gathering her thoughts. “What do you think?” she asked finally.
“I wouldn’t know, because you were already married and gone when I became a part of your family. The only time I saw your parents interact with you was when we got together. And by then you had married a successful man and given them two beautiful grandsons, so you seemed to be just about a perfect daughter.”
“They were stricter with me,” said Sheila, “and I was scolded for the things Nikhil was never reprimanded for. Back then, I thought it was because he was younger, the baby. And double standards are the norm in our culture, so most girls like you and I never think of questioning them.”
“True.”
“As I grew older, I realized there were other reasons for the way they behaved, but I didn’t pay much attention. Besides, I loved Niku. I wasn’t jealous of him. And in my own way, I spoiled him too.”
Isha adjusted the baby in her lap. “I know they doted on Nikhil. He was perfect, according to them. But he wasn’t. He was a good man, but he could be impatient and arrogant, often short-tempered. Nonetheless Ayee and Baba still thought he was flawless. I didn’t mind that because I, too, thought Nikhil was a 102 Shobhan Bantwal
great husband and father. I only wish he’d told his parents off more often, instead of pretending they had no faults.”
Sheila shook her head. “I can’t blame him for that, Isha. I was the same way . . . still am. I have no guts to stand before them and say they’re bigots, and that their way of thinking is ridiculously flawed. Maybe Niku was a coward like me.”
“No, he wasn’t,” retorted Isha, immediately springing to his defense. “He was only being a good son who never talked back to his parents. He was trying to do his duty. That’s all it was.”
“Whatever it was that made him do the things he did, it died with him, I suppose,” said Sheila in a resigned tone of voice.
“God knows what other secrets he took with him.” She threw a wary glance at Isha. “I don’t care what the police say, but I’m convinced his death was not connected to a robbery. Other than the cash in the office safe, practically nothing of value was taken. How could it be a robbery? I’m not entirely sure, but I suspect someone wanted him dead.”
Isha felt her skin prickle. “So you feel the same way I do!”
“I’ve felt that way since the day it happened.”
“Why didn’t you say something to me?” All this time, Isha had tortured herself thinking about the strange way her husband had died.
“Isha, you were so torn and depressed, why would I add to your misery by telling you that someone may have killed Niku deliberately?” Sheila blew out a long breath. “Besides, it was only a suspicion. I have no proof.”
It was such a relief to know she wasn’t crazy that Isha couldn’t help smiling. “When I voiced my suspicions to your parents about the possibility of Nikhil’s death being premeditated, Ayee merely brushed it off saying I was trying to invent excuses to cover up for my own and my baby’s paaygoon, ” she said, referring to a term that, loosely translated, meant footprint or characteristic of the foot, but metaphorically a person’s fate, good or bad.
“Ayee needs to have her head examined,” said Sheila. “After Niku’s death I think she’s lost her mind completely.” She let her eyes rove around the room once again, taking in every inch of it.
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“Why are you here, Isha?” she asked, changing the subject. “Why St. Mary’s of all places?”
“Why not St. Mary’s? I get room and board and a safe place for my children in return for working at the orphanage.”
Sheila gaped at her. “The orphanage! Those kids are filthy.
Why would you want to work there?”
“It’s not that bad. Besides, those poor children need a little mothering, and—”
“But you were born and raised in affluence,” interrupted Sheila. “And then you married into a wealthy family.”
Isha’s temper stirred. “What was I supposed to do, Sheila?
Let Ayee and Baba keep needling me about Diya? As it is, poor Priya was treated like a stepchild. Instead of comforting a little girl who was crying because her Papa wasn’t around anymore, she got thoroughly spanked by your father.”
“No! Baba struck Priya?”
“Oh yes. I couldn’t imagine what Diya’s plight would have been.” She shuddered at the thought. “I had to leave before the situation worsened.”
“I’m sorry; I wasn’t thinking,” murmured Sheila. “But didn’t you take any money with you when you left? I know Niku and Baba kept a large amount of cash at home for emergencies.”
Isha’s chin came up instinctively. “I didn’t want any of their money. I only took the small amount Nikhil kept in our room and my jewelry out of the safe deposit box.”
“But Niku’s hard-earned money is yours and his children’s!”
Isha shook her head and lifted the baby to her shoulder, patting her back to help her stomach settle. “I didn’t want them to feel I took anything that belonged to them. Even my clothes,”
she said, pointing to the suitcases stacked up in the corner. “I took the bare minimum with me—half a suitcase for myself.
The rest are Priya’s things.” Unfortunately there was a pile of unwashed clothes sitting on the floor and Sheila was looking at them.
“What
are you going to do for the future, Isha?” Sheila’s expression was filled with concern.
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“The nuns have allowed me to take four weeks off to recover.
After that I go back to work, and I’ll be allowed to keep Diya with me at all times.”
Sheila stared out the window for a long time. “I have a suggestion,” she said, finally breaking the uncomfortable silence.
“I refuse to go back to Ayee and Baba. That’s not an option.”
Isha rose from the chair, laid Diya down on the cot, and un-wound the sheet she was swaddled in to change her wet nappy.
“I’m not talking about that. Why don’t you stay with Kumar and me and the boys? Our house is large enough for you and the girls.”
Isha shook her head. “No. That’s going to cause problems between you and your parents, and it’s the last thing I want.”
“But you can’t stay here forever!” Sheila’s eyes were plead-ing. “Look at this place. I’m not condemning it, but it’s not a healthy environment for you or the children. Do you know how many diseases those orphans have? What if your girls catch something awful? You don’t even have money for a doctor.”
“I’ll manage somehow.” Isha threw the soaked nappy in a plastic bag, then cleaned the baby and pinned a fresh one in place. She glanced at Sheila. “I’ve done it for the last few months and I’ll do it in the future.”
“But how? How will you buy clothes for the children, medicines . . . all the necessities?” Sheila held out her arms, meaning she wanted to hold the baby again.
“I’m doing this only until I get the insurance money.” Isha handed Sheila the child and went back to the chair. It was a warm feeling to observe Sheila cradling the baby with no inhibi-tions. She had to admit that her sister-in-law was a kind woman.
How could such heartless parents produce two such nice and decent individuals like Nikhil and Sheila?
“What insurance money?” Despite her preoccupation with the baby, Sheila was obviously paying attention to Isha’s words.
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