Troop 18

by Jessica L. Webb

  Andy looked blankly up at the sky, remembering how grim Lincoln’s face had been when he asked the troop to reassemble. The troop had stood at near attention in the living room, the bright, warm sun shining brilliantly in painful contrast to the nervous fear gripping the room as Lincoln gave his final decision.

  Shipman and Frances were released from their Cadet Training Agreements. Everyone else had another chance. Their six month probation was extended to a year, and they would be closely monitored and held to the most rigid of standards, but they all had another chance. As the cadets dared to show relief, stealing guilty looks at Shipman who sat very still at the back of the room, Lincoln held up a warning hand.

  “This is not a gift I’m giving you,” Lincoln said. “If you make it through the next two months at Depot, I am in effect sending you out into your rookie year with a handicap. Everyone will be watching you. Rumours will precede you wherever you go. Some cops won’t like you before you even arrive. Many won’t trust you. Get used to it. Get through it. Figure out how to stand on your own two feet, cadets. It’s the only way you’re going to have a career as a Mountie.”

  Andy toyed absently with Kate’s cold fingers. She pressed them between the heat of her palms. Kate smiled and waited.

  “I want to fast forward five years…one year even, to see where the cadets end up. Then I’ll know if it was the right decision,” Andy said, knowing she was avoiding the question. “I think half of them won’t make it through their rookie year,” Andy said finally. “But I think they deserved their second chance.”

  Kate nodded, and then she touched her fingers very lightly to Andy’s face, as if telling her to re-listen to her own words. So she did. And she heard it this time with finality, with a kind of inevitability. The ache and the uncertainty about the troop left her body and her mind in a rapid, draining exodus. The last grip of her responsibility and control over the cadets slipped away in the cold air. It was gone. They were gone. Andy smiled at Kate, the first time she’d smiled today.

  “Thanks,” Andy said, kissing Kate lightly then slipping her arm around Kate’s waist as they continued walking.

  Andy was just about to ask Kate a question when her cell phone beeped from her back pocket.

  “It’s my parents,” Andy said, anticipation building in her chest. She fumbled with the keys, finally opening the message as Kate held her breath. “It’s a girl!” she said. “Born 4:43 p.m. after fourteen hours of labour, nine pounds, three ounces, lots of hair. They’ve named her McKayla Andy…” Shock froze the words in her throat. Kate grinned, tears sparkling in her eyes. “McKayla Andy Wyles,” she read out loud, this time with the most incredible sense of wonder.

  “You have a namesake,” Kate said as Andy answered the text then shoved the phone back into her pocket.

  “Yeah,” Andy said, her throat tight. “Guess we should go to Calgary to meet the little creature.”

  Just as they reached the porch of the cabin, snow began to drift down from the sky in slow, soft spirals of white that melted the second they touched the ground. Kate gave a small cry of excitement and turned her face toward the sky. Andy did too, the flakes brushing against her face, tumbling down until they caught on her hair and jacket.

  “Can we sit outside for a minute?” Kate said, her voice hushed, like speaking too loudly could break the spell of snow.

  “Sure. Give me a minute.”

  Andy entered the cold cabin, lit the already built woodpile in the fireplace, and pulled a well-worn wool blanket from a drawer. She joined Kate on the porch step, spreading the blanket over their legs, arranging themselves so they were comfortable and close. They watched the snow and processed the long day. Andy’s thoughts followed no logical order. She felt no weight, no immediacy, no pressure to do or remember or think. Kate curled against her side.

  “Two days off together,” Kate said into the silence, still entranced with the snow falling onto the meadow.

  “Two days,” Andy repeated. They’d rarely had time to themselves, even before their months apart.

  “Two days, then back to Vancouver. Back to my two jobs,” she said, as if she was testing out the thought, still getting used to how it sounded.

  “Back to our two apartments,” Andy added, not exactly sure what made her say it.

  Kate looked up at Andy, and she knew they were both thinking about that moment in Hidden Valley when Kate had asked Andy to move in with her. Andy always felt guilty about that moment and Kate’s expression when she assumed Andy was rejecting her. It wasn’t rejection. Andy had just been trying so very hard to be careful, to make no wrong moves with Kate. It had backfired badly.

  Kate gave Andy a knowing, sympathetic smile then tucked her head into Andy’s shoulder, hiding her eyes. Andy wanted to say the right thing this time. She stroked Kate’s hair gently.

  “When you’re ready, ask me again,” she said quietly.

  Kate only nodded slightly, a small movement against Andy’s neck. Andy calmed a little, relaxed, reminded herself that there was no hurry. They had time.

  The snow picked up as more clouds moved in, a heavier blanket now blocking their view of the meadow. It closed them in together in the most wonderful way, helping them retreat from the world.

  “Andy?” Kate’s voice was soft.

  “Yes?”

  “When we get back to Vancouver, will you move in with me?”

  Andy lit up with joy, struggling to hold herself as still as Kate. She reined herself in and calmed herself down.

  “Yes,” she said, not able to keep the intense happiness out of her voice. She felt Kate’s smile, though she didn’t move. Andy wondered why, an unwelcome thread of worry unwinding in her stomach. Kate took a breath, as if she was steeling herself for something.

  “Maybe I should have qualified the question before I let you answer,” Kate said, sitting up. Andy could see the resolve in the set of her mouth. Andy readied her brain, her body, and her heart. She would take whatever qualifiers Kate wanted to place on this. If Kate wanted to take this slow, Andy would take it slow.

  “When I ask you to move in with me, I don’t mean you start spending more time at my place than yours, or that you store more clothes in my house and have a drawer for your stuff. I mean three days from now, you are giving your landlord your two months notice, and you and I are arguing about whose couch is more comfortable and how many lamps we need in one apartment and which brand of shampoo we’re going to buy.

  “And I mean that we finally meet each other’s friends, we have them over to our place, our place,” Kate repeated, as if she could tell Andy was having trouble accepting this, “and you cook for them and I…do whatever it is that I do. And I tell the phone company as many times as I need to that you are my girlfriend, that you are my partner. And we never see each other at Christmas because we both always take the shitty holiday shifts so people with families can be home with their kids.”

  Andy just stared, her heart pounding. They’d arrived at the conversation, the only topic they had ever avoided with each other. Kate picked up Andy’s hand and linked their cold fingers together. When she spoke again, her voice was soft but very sure. “And we finally admit to each other that neither of us wants to have kids.” Kate let this sink in for a moment before carrying on. “But we’re there to see our nieces and nephews and your godson grow up. We’re there for all of it. So…that’s what I mean.”

  Andy sat very still, her shock at Kate’s words slowly turning to amazement. She’d never met anyone like Kate. There had never been anyone like Kate.

  “So ask me again,” Andy said, her voice hushed. “Ask me what you really want to ask me.”

  The sweetest smile touched Kate’s face and she leaned in, brushed her lips over Andy’s cheek, and whispered in her ear.

  “Will you marry me?”

  Andy closed her eyes, felt the heat of Kate’s breath against her cheek, the incredible warmth of belonging in her chest.

  “Yes.”

 
About the Author

  Jessica Webb spends her professional days working with educators to find the why behind the challenging behaviors of the students they support. Limitless curiosity about the motivations and intentions of human behavior is also a huge part of what drives her to write stories and understand the complexities of her characters and their actions.

  When she’s not working or writing, Jessica is spending time with her wife and daughter, usually planning where they will travel next. Jessica can be found most often in her favourite spot on the couch with a book and a cup of tea.

  Jessica can be contacted at: jessicalwebb.author@gmail.com

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