Jaymee deflected the questions with the story she and Jed had agreed on, that she’d planned to lease her house to him for a year and he helped with the cleaning and remodeling.
“And you don’t know where he is now?” the young stranger asked, a touch skeptically.
His eyes, a warm, magnetic blue, were cool and quizzical as he studied her from head to toe. Like Nick, there was an air about him that hinted of something underneath that friendly demeanor. The way he stood so still amidst the activity of the other “sweepers” also reminded her a little of Jed. He might be a few years younger than her, but she had the feeling he’d seen a lot more about life than she’d ever known. Another mark against her. No wonder Nick thought she wouldn’t ever be “safe” enough for him. She was so stupid to think she could make it work.
“Nope,” Jaymee answered, looking back at him just as coolly.
His blue eyes narrowed, as if trying to gauge her honesty. “I find it strange you didn’t call the police.”
“I like Jed.” Jaymee cocked her head. “I trust him.” And Nick. And Grace.
“And you don’t trust me,” he stated. When Jaymee didn’t refute it, he added, “Why are you keeping information from me? Jed McNeil and I work for the same people. You obviously know more than you’re telling, what with a clean-up unit here sweeping your house after a bomb scare. I’m not here to harm him, or these guys here would have taken me out already. They know me.”
He nodded towards the people working around her house. Despite what little Jed had told her, Jaymee liked the intelligence gleaming in the younger man’s eyes, knew from instinct he wasn’t sent to harm Jed. However, she’d decided to side with Jed and Grace, and so she stuck with her story.
“All I know’s what I told you,” she told the stranger calmly. “Florida is full of transients. They come and go. Some I like, and some I don’t.”
He did smile then, and Jaymee had to smile back. The look he gave her was cocky and confident.
“Nice. But then I wouldn’t want it so easy. Less of a challenge. I’ll find him sooner or later,” he said. “Thank you for your time, Miss Barrows.”
She wondered whether he was part of this Virus Program Nick and Jed were in. No, she decided, as she watched him walk off to his car. He moved differently from the stealthy, lazy stroll she’d noticed in Nick and Jed. And there was an arrogance in the way he looked and walked that reminded her of a cat on the prowl. She shook her head as he drove off, mocking her own imagination. She hadn’t changed one bit, still putting men into animal categories.
Which suddenly brought her full circle back to Nick. Her big, bad wolf.
With iron determination, she forced the mental picture of Nick away. She didn’t think she could bear having Mindy call her, or having her father following her everywhere, or going through another awkward conversation with anyone who thought she needed consolation.
All she wanted was to be left alone. Was that too much to ask?
Later, she ordered shingles to be stocked at the other house the coming week, and after the call, ran all the way to the now “swept” place to start work on the roof.
For the next two days, she tore at the old roof by herself, digging up the shingles with a shovel. It was good, methodical work, the kind that exhausted her enough to sleep for a few hours at night. When she’d removed the shingles and original underlayment, she unrolled the tar felt paper over the cleaned-off plywood, fastening it down with simplex nails. The task was a two-man job, really, but she didn’t want company. Perspiration poured down her forehead and blinded momentarily, she hit her forefinger with the hammer at full force.
Pain jolted from the finger to every nerve end in her body. Cursing aloud and sucking her injured finger alternatively, she watched the blood blister that had immediately formed. The throbbing shot through her numbness, bringing her whole body alive again. Every feeling she’d tried to block pounced. With a groan, Jaymee sat down onto the roof.
Pain. It ploughed through her like a live current. Physical and mental pain wrapped around her like invisible wires, coiling tighter and tighter until she felt she would burst with the torture. The pain strangled her, made it impossible to move. Hugging her knees, she ground her head against her thighs, moaning and shivering even though it was ninety degrees outside.
Jaymee sat like that for a long time, unheeding of the heat, her eyes unseeing as she stared down at the tangled bushes around the old house. That was what her life was, she realized. An old house in need of repair and new life. So ignored outside, it was being choked by untended growth. She’d spent eight years working to pay for her past and planning to pay for her future. She’d never lived for herself as in the now, and if Nick had taught her anything, it was to live for the present, to enjoy what she could.
She took a deep breath and slowly got up. She felt as if she was a thousand years old. She leaned on the shovel for support, gathering her strength, making decisions. She had to change, to prune away all the tangled growth in her life, or she was going to end up like this old house. By the time her father came home that evening, she’d already booked the tickets.
“I’m taking off,” she announced. “I need to go away.” She waited for the protests.
Bob washed his hands at the sink and joined her at the table. “You deserve to go on a holiday, Jaymee girl.”
Jaymee stared at her father in undisguised astonishment. A month ago, he would have given her an earful about leaving for a vacation. Somehow, he’d changed these last few weeks.
“Where are you going?”
“Europe,” she told him, frowning. “Don’t worry, I’m using my own savings.” The money she’d put away to remodel her old house.
“You’ve always wanted to visit there. How long will you be gone?”
“I don’t know. A month. Two. Till my money runs out.” She paused. “Is it selfish? Can you take care of the business that long?”
“I think selfish is what you need to be right now, Jaymee girl. I’ve been selfish for too long.” Bob shifted in his chair uncomfortably. “I do remember how to run a roofing business, you know, even if I can’t get back on the roof. We can hang on till you come back.”
“The loans are up to date. The only bills are current ones, and the jobs are lined up...”
Bob interrupted gruffly, “I thought we agreed you’re going to be selfish. Now, tell me about your travel plans instead.”
For the first time in a long, long time, Bob Barrows smiled at his daughter and opened his arms. Jaymee slowly walked towards him and hugged her father.
***
The humidity reminded Killian of Jaymee. Sluicing water over his sweaty body after a hard day of hiking reminded him of Jaymee. Eating. Drinking. Sleeping. Every damned thing reminded him of her, and there was nothing for him to do but to endure it.
If Jed noticed his foul mood, he didn’t say anything. Her name wasn’t mentioned once since they’d left. Their assignment had been completed a week ago after they had trapped their targets, and Jed had relayed electronically to Command the decoded encryption board. He had the satisfaction of personally dealing with them, especially two, whose description fitted that given by Jaymee, down to the smell of cologne.
There was still much to do. The scums who had used Jaymee against him had been mere mercenaries. They had given the names of their handlers, but in the world of covert games, handlers had handlers, and every personal agenda had to be determined before the next move.
Killian watched as Jed cleaned and cooked fish over an open fire. Grace was taking a nap close by, having been thoroughly worked out by her father that morning in a series of exercises. He could only marvel at the young girl’s tolerance for pain, for it was pain and endurance Jed was training her in.
He mulled over his next step. Jed had told him getting those men wasn’t enough. He had his own agenda to meet.
Killian understood. There was still Grace to think about and time spent training her meant extra time for Je
d to assimilate his information and come up with a solution to the crisis waiting for them back at Command. For himself, this particular mission was over. Time to return to Command Center and be debriefed.
“I’m going back tomorrow,” he said. “Is everything taken care of?”
Jed’s glance was calculating. “It depends on what you mean.”
His attention returned to the fish. Killian sighed. He wasn’t in the mood for mind games.
“The hell you don’t.” He couldn’t help the curtness in his reply. Sleep had eluded him for weeks now.
“The satellites are going to be destroyed. The unit is still looking for me, and,” Jed paused a beat, then went on conversationally, “Jaymee had left a message where I told her.”
Killian wanted to punch something, someone. Even her name was painful to hear. “And?”
“The team came and swept the place, and she’s fine, I suppose.”
“What the hell do you mean, you suppose?”
He glared at his cousin’s cool silver stare. Jed shrugged. His tone of voice was deceptively nonchalant, meant to infuriate.
“I can’t vouch for what she’s going through or how she is, since I’m not there physically. She mentioned some young man looking for me, and that was all there was to her message.”
“She didn’t ask about me?” Why did he ask that? He didn’t want to know.
“Of course she did,” Jed replied, still in that mild voice. “What do you want me to tell her? That you don’t care, or that you do?”
“Damn you, Jed.”
“You’re the one looking damned, cousin.” The retort was dry, amused.
“Back off!” Killian all but snarled, then reined in his anger with effort. “What did you want me to do? Take her with me to D.C.? Leave her whenever I take off? I thought, of all people, you would understand the danger.” He regretted his outburst immediately. Jed didn’t deserve that. Sighing, he attempted to apologize. “I’m sorry. I’m not thinking straight.”
Jed was silent as he turned the fish over in the pan. “There are always choices, Nick.”
“Yeah, tell Command that.”
“I haven’t reported to them you’re alive. In fact, you missed a relevant part of Jaymee’s message. They’re looking for me, Kill. No one else.”
The silence that followed was broken by Grace, who sat up in her sleeping bag, yawning.
“What do you mean?” Nick queried carefully, trying to read his cousin’s expression.
“You tell me. What do you want it to mean? Is the Programmer dead, or not? Has he disappeared? Enquiring agencies want to know.” There was true amusement tingeing Jed’s voice now.
To Nick’s amazement, Jed started to laugh as he continued to stare at him. His own mind was running a sixty-yard dash to...to what? Freedom. Jaymee. Sunshine. Jaymee.
“What about you?” he asked, his voice a low gravelly rumble. “You said Jaymee wrote someone was coming after you. They’ll get you sooner or later.”
Jed shrugged again, his usually harsh demeanor softened by amusement. “I’m not dead, just missing. I know how to keep in touch with them and give them relevant information just to show how much I miss them. They’ll find me in a year or so. I’ll give that young tracker that long, and if he fails, I’ll show up at Command Center like I promised.”
“Maybe the tracker will give up.” It was entirely possible. Tracking the Ice Man wasn’t an easy assignment, and a young tracker probably didn’t have the experience or the patience.
“Not likely. I ran a check on him while I was sending in the report. Lance Mercy has an interesting file. Five years in COMCEN and already shot up the ranks like a rocket. He single-handedly, it seems, tracked down and revealed the identity of the Beijing Butcher to Command last year.”
Nick whistled softly. “Impressive. Sounds like you’re going to have fun. The Beijing Butcher and the Ice Man under his belt in five years. I’d like to meet young Mercy some day.”
“He hasn’t found me yet.” Jed looked in Grace’s direction. “And he won’t, till she’s ready.”
Nick followed his gaze. “She’s special.”
“So is Jaymee.” Jed actually smiled at Nick. “Give her my love.”
“The hell I will.” He still held a grudge against Jed for kissing her. “The next time you kiss her, it’d better be a brotherly smack on the cheek.”
Jed’s shapely lips quirked with mockery. “That is, if she’s married to you.”
Nick’s eyes narrowed suspiciously. “What do you mean now?”
Taking his time, Jed turned the fish over.
“Meat’s done,” Grace murmured from where she was as she sniffed the air. “Just like Cousin Kill.”
Jed slanted a look at his daughter’s direction. “Jaymee strikes me as someone who evades anyone who hurt her badly.” He sat back and rubbed his chin thoughtfully. “She’s probably never going to forgive you.”
That did it. Killian stood up in a hurry.
“Hey, Nick.”
He turned and scowled down at his cousin. Manipulating bastard. He knew he’d been expertly played.
“Do keep in contact, so I know I don’t stand a chance with the lady.”
And Jed laughed again. Grace grinned at Killian cheekily.
“See ya sometime, cousin Nick,” she said, waving.
***
Jaymee didn’t contact anyone while she was in Europe. She was, finally, alone. And lonely. Europe was enchanting, beautiful--everything she had imagined it to be. She sat down by a fountain in Piazza Navona, entertained only by a mime who told her in actions she looked lonely. She’d smiled back and nodded, giving him a tip for such insight. She leaned against the leaning tower of Pisa and wondered how such weakness could survive all its problems. She climbed up the Alps and wondered whether the glaciers were as cold as her heart. She ate without relish the foreign dishes, dutifully trying the different wines, the warm beer, the exotic chocolates, the array of cheeses. Everything.
Every cathedral and museum was a monument of her own deadness. So she went shopping instead, maxing out her credit card. Clothes in Rome. Perfume in Paris. Lace in Venice.
She looked at the superb statue of David and wished she could buy it to take home because it reminded her of someone warmer, sexier, with the big parts intact. Looking at the Greek deities, she wondered whether a fig leaf would look funny on Nick. That had brought out a bitter laugh. It seemed she couldn’t forget, no matter where she was.
And late at night, she still cried.
Home.
Jaymee pulled up at the driveway to her house exactly six weeks after she left for Europe. The evening sun was a giant orange globe, getting ready for fall weather. Other than that, as she looked listlessly around, nothing had changed.
Her father greeted her with a hug. “It was wonderful to hear your voice over the phone,” he said, looking robust and healthy. “I sure have missed you, Jaymee girl.”
“How’s everything? Work OK?”
She pulled the suitcases out of her trunk. She had left with a small bag and returned with three giant ones.
“Oh, we’ve been busy. Anderson called just a few days ago, in fact, and he says the roofs by Glenn’s men are leaking, and he wants us back.” Bob laughed. “I told him he needed to negotiate the price with you when you return. It felt good saying that, after what he did. Everything’s fine, in fact...you look different, Jaymee girl. Very good.”
She was dressed different, that was all. Her father hadn’t seen her in anything more than a work shirt and pants for most of eight years. Now, she was wearing a designer blouse and short skirt. Beneath her outfit, she wore expensive lingerie and French perfume. Even her hair had been cut and restyled. But no amount of change on the outside healed the emptiness she felt inside.
“Thanks, Dad.”
She looked around the house after her luggage was brought in. Everything was tidy. The kitchen sink was clean. The tile floor had been mopped. Even the living ro
om had been dusted down. Her father, it seemed, had survived better without her.
“The house looks great.”
“I have a...er...housemate now,” Bob admitted, looking uncomfortable. “I hope you don’t mind, Jaymee girl. I wasn’t sure when you were coming back and all, and well, I needed someone to supervise the roofing work. I told him it ain’t a permanent position, so...”
“Dad, it’s your roofing business too,” Jaymee interrupted. Her father was right; he couldn’t possibly work like she did. She smiled, thinking he probably enjoyed the male company. “A clean housemate is always welcomed. Where is he?”
“He...uh...he’s back at your house, the one you bought.”
She froze. “What?”
“Well, he liked to work and I set him to clear the main driveway to the house for easier access. He...”
“No one touches that house,” Jaymee cut in tonelessly. “You shouldn’t have let him. Just because I let you know about the place didn’t mean I wanted you to work on it.”
She saw her words hurt her father’s feelings, but she didn’t care. No one was allowed to go where she and Nick had spent time together.
“I didn’t know,” Bob apologized. “When the delivery men showed up after you left, I just thought...”
Jaymee sighed. She remembered her phone orders for shingles and gravel. She couldn’t blame her father for assuming she wanted work to continue on that house while she was away. After all, she hadn’t left any instructions.
“I...I’ll just go over there and meet him now, I guess.” She had to be polite to this man, for her father’s sake. “You seem to like him, Dad.”
“Oh yes, sure do. He’s been a big help while you were away, and although I wasn’t sure whether I liked him at first, I find him...ah...a good man.”
“All right, we’ll talk more later, but I think I’ll drive over there to see how the house is, seeing you have cleared the driveway.”
“Go ahead. I think you’ll like it.” A small smile touched his lips.
Holding Out For A Hero: SEALs, Soldiers, Spies, Cops, FBI Agents and Rangers Page 43
