by Lena Nicole
By Lena Nicole
* * *
The One Left Behind
a novel
Copyright © 2013 by Lena Nicole
Cover Design by HB Heinzer
Editing by Fallon McCullough of Snow Editing
Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of the above author of this book.
This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, brands, media, and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any trademarks, service marks, product names, or named features are assumed to be the property of their respective owners and are used only for reference. There is no implied endorsement if any of these terms are used.
To Scott, Steven, Aiden and Natalie
“Falling in love is like jumping off a really tall building. Your brain tells you it is not a good idea, but your heart tells you, you can fly.” –Unknown
I NEVER BELIEVED in love at first sight, but I do believe that every person has one soul mate. Whether or not we find that person is left up to chance. Fortunately for me, I met my soul mate on a random night at a bar.
Initially, I was a little put off by his corny pick-up lines and his cocky attitude. But after spending one day with him I knew I wouldn’t be able to stop my heart from falling for him.
I’m supposed to meet Colin on the beach. He wanted to meet here at 7:30 this evening to share some exciting news. Looking ahead, I instantly spot him.
He’s sitting on a blanket with a bunch of stuff scattered around him. From this distance I can’t make out what it is, but I don’t care because I can’t take my eyes off of him. He hasn’t noticed me walking toward him yet so I take advantage of the moment to take in his sexiness. He’s sitting on the blanket with his long body leaning back on one elbow with one knee bent and the other leg stretched out in front of him. He’s staring out at the ocean giving me a view of his perfect profile. The light breeze blowing off the water is gently ruffling his blond hair. I’m casually looking up and down his body when my eyes get stuck on his sculpted shoulders that are flexed from supporting his weight while reclined back. The breeze blows open the top of his shirt since he has the first few buttons undone revealing a deliciously defined chest. I’m almost to the edge of the blanket when he looks up at me with the most beautiful blue eyes I’ve ever seen. His eyes are without a doubt my favorite thing on him. I give him a small smile as I’m crouching down to sit on the blanket and he flashes me a striking smile that showcases his dimples.
I look around us at all the things he has set up and smile bigger. He thought of everything from champagne to strawberries. He even brought the gummy bears he knows I love so much. This must mean one thing.
We’re celebrating.
I can’t help but get excited for him and feel giddy. I know he was supposed to hear back from the law firm about his application. He has worked so hard to get this position so this whole set up must mean that he got it.
I kneel on my knees and wrap my arms around his neck and greet him with a kiss. He momentarily deepens the kiss but pulls back slightly before things get out of hand.
“Hello, my love,” he says this with the warmest smile on his face that melts my heart and makes me weak in the knees.
“Hello, yourself. Champagne, strawberries, and gummy bears? You shouldn’t have,” I tease and give him one more peck on the cheek before sitting next to him. I snatch up some gummy bears and say, “I hate to ruin your surprise since you went through all this trouble, but I can’t wait anymore. I think I know why we’re here.” I pop a few gummy bears in my mouth.
“Oh, you do? Well, then, please enlighten me.” He leans away from me with a bemused smile on his face like he knows something I don’t.
“Yep, you’re here to tell me that your hard work and brilliance has paid off and that you got the position at the law firm. I had no doubt you would, by the way.” He tucks a strand of hair behind my ear with the same look on his face as he says, “I guess the cat is out of the bag.”
I leap up and jump onto him straddling his hips as I kiss him with all the love and pride I feel for him. “That’s great, baby! I knew you’d get it!”
He cups my jaw as he stares into my eyes before he gently pushes me off of his lap. He gets up from his laid back position and sits up straight. “I’ve always admired you for the support you’ve given me, but that’s not why we’re here.” He has a mischievous grin on his face while I look at him in confusion. “Addison, I want you to know that I love you for believing in me and making me strive to be a better person.” I notice his hands are shaking and he looks nervous.
“Babe, is everything okay? I furrow my brows as I try to read his expression.
“Just stand up with me for a second.” He pulls on my hands and helps me get to my feet.
I’m still slightly confused until I see his eyes soften and they appear to be glossing over. He drops down to one knee and it dawns on me what he’s doing. A plethora of emotions run through my body. Excitement. Love. A little anxiety. I put my right hand over my mouth as he starts to speak.
“I never believed in love at first sight, but I knew the moment I saw you that you were it for me. You make every breath I breathe worth taking and not a day goes by where I can imagine my life without you. Will you make me the happiest man on Earth and do me the honors of being my wife? I can’t promise it will be easy all the time, but I can promise it will be worth fighting for.
“Addison Claire Ramsey, will you marry me?”
I can’t tell if my palms are sweating or if it’s his, but my mind is racing with what he just asked me. I’m looking down at him and time stands still.
The time we took silly pictures in a photo booth because he insisted we needed more pictures together. The pictures are still on my fridge. The first one is of him wiggling his eyebrows. When the camera snapped the picture he had the most ridiculous expression on his face that made me throw my head back in laughter. In the next frame I was cracking up as I grabbed his arm and leaned in to him. He’s looking at me from the corner of his eye and smiling. My favorite of the four is where we are nose to nose staring at each other. I remember wanting to kiss him so bad in that moment. After the picture clicked, he slowly licked his lips and left them parted. I clutched the front of his shirt and pulled him closer to erase the distance between us. Our lips collided giving into the desire that had been building. The last frame is of us embracing each other passionately as we pour ourselves into this one kiss.
I think back to the time he remembered our six month anniversary—even though I didn’t—and had flowers delivered to my condo. There were six dozen roses, one dozen for each month we were together. Afterwards, he took me back to where we had our first date – Cup of Joes.
I smile at the thought of him bringing me coffee during my late night shifts at the hospital. That in itself was sweet, but what got me was that he should have been using that time to study for the Bar Exam and sleeping so he’d have enough rest to prepare for it again the next day. Instead, he was up late at night, thinking of me and my caffeine addiction.
Colin clears his throat and I realize I must have been standing here staring at him for a while because he looks more nervous now than when he started. I snap out of the daze I was in.
Marriage.
We haven’t been together for a full year yet. Is that long enough to know you want to spend the rest of your life with someone? I know that in my heart I love
Colin and I do believe he is the one for me, but I don’t want to rush this. We haven’t even moved in together yet. If we really are soul mates, then there should be no need to jump the gun on this, right?
I WAKE UP and it feels like I’ve been asleep for days. My head is pounding and I’m a little disoriented. I try to sit up, but I’m sore as hell. What the hell happened? It feels like I’ve been hit by a truck. Twice. I finally open my eyes and realize I’m in an unfamiliar place. Florescent lights blind me. There’s a table to my left with flowers on it. I hear sounds coming from my right. As I am glancing over that way, I realize I’m lying in a hospital bed. What the hell? How did I get here? I search the room frantically for answers and my eyes fall on my best friend, Jeremy, sitting in a chair on the other side of the room. He’s watching TV and is apparently unaware that I’m awake and starting to freak out.
“Jeremy,” I say in a raspy voice.
He glances over at me, “Hey, buddy. How are you feeling?”
“Like death.” I rub my head hoping it eases the pain when the fog in my brain finally lifts. “Oh, fuck. Where’s Addison?” I try to jump up from the bed but I’m hooked up to a bunch of cords and monitors. I’m starting to panic. I need to get to her immediately and find out if she’s alright.
Jeremy gently holds me down. “Relax. Let me call the nurse and let her know that you’re awake and I’ll call Addison’s mom and let her know too. She can fill you in on Addison.” Relax? How am I supposed to relax when I don’t know if Addison is okay or not?
I feel sick to my stomach and the only thing I want to do is jump out of this bed and run up and down the halls looking for her. Jeremy didn’t seem alarmed, so maybe that means Addison is okay.
A moment later a short, plump old lady walks in. “Hello, Colin. My name is Betty and I’ll be your nurse. How are you feeling? Would you like some water?”
All I can do is nod. My throat is clogged with the fear that I’m responsible for seriously hurting Addison. She takes my vitals and checks me over. “I’ll be right back with some water. I’m going to let the doctor know you’re awake. He’ll want to talk to you, okay?” Again, I just nod. A few minutes later, she comes back with some water and a straw, but I barely touch it.
What feels like hours later, a man walks in wearing a white lab coat. He looks to be in his fifties, has very bushy eyebrows, gray hair, and brown eyes. He walks up to my bedside and introduces himself.
“Hi, Colin. I’m Dr. Salvatore and I’m your attending physician. Do you know why you’re here?” I nod. He continues, “You were in an accident, which I’m assuming you know.” Again, I nod in agreement. “You didn’t suffer any major injuries. You had a pretty nasty bump on your head, but after monitoring your brain there was no swelling or internal damage. You’ll be sore for a little while, but you were pretty lucky.”
I could care less about my injuries at this point. “Have you seen Addison? Is she okay? Can I see her?” I’m becoming more frantic the longer it takes for me to get answers.
The doctor holds up his hand to halt my line of questioning. “Addison is in recovery. I was just in there before I came to check on you. She’s still unconscious but we won’t know more about possible brain damage until she wakes up. I have to make my rounds to my other patients, but her mother will be in shortly to talk to you about her.”
I think I’ve stopped breathing. Did he say brain damage? I break out in a sweat thinking about what that could mean. I watch the doctor walk out of the room. I want to question him about the severity of the brain damage but the words are stuck in my throat.
A few minutes after the doctor leaves, Addison’s mom knocks on the door and comes in. “Colin, dear. I’m so glad you’re okay. How are you feeling?” Her eyes are red and puffy from now-dry tears.
“I’m fine, Jenna. How’s Addison? I’m freaking out over here and I’m not really getting any answers.”
Jenna looks down and sniffles, “She’s still asleep. They had to do surgery to help with the swelling to her brain. We really won’t know anything until she wakes up. There could be possible brain damage, but no one is for certain at this point.”
I throw my head back against the pillows and stare up at the ceiling. My eyes start to blur from unshed tears at the thought of not having my Addison with me. “I’m so sorry, Jenna. I didn’t even see it coming until it was too late. This is all my fault,” I whisper as I avert my eyes from Jenna’s.
Jenna grabs my hand and squeezes it tight, “Colin, don’t you dare put this on yourself. You did nothing wrong, you hear me? She’s going to be okay.” I squeeze her hand back trying desperately to believe her.
“Can I see her? I really need to see her.” My words come out broken as I try to swallow back the rising emotion.
“Yes, let me talk to the nurse for you and see when you can get up.” She leans over and gives me a kiss on the cheek. “Everything is going to work out,” she calls back to me over her shoulder with a weak smile before leaving the room.
Several hours later I’m being pushed down the hall in a wheelchair on my way to Addison’s room. I’m trying to brace myself for what I might see, but am still unprepared when I finally get there. I look at her and feel like I’ve been kicked in the stomach. She looks so frail and small lying in the bed. Her head is wrapped up, her blond hair falling down around the bandages. Her face is slightly swollen and I notice her arms have some bruises on them. I grab her hand with both of mine as I stare at her face. Her full lips are parted but I’m unable to hear her breathing above the sounds of the various monitors scattered across the room. Looking at her battered body has images of the accident that landed her in this bed flashing through my mind.
Flashes of white lights fast approaching keep appearing in my head as I sit and stare at her. Each time I see it, a new wave of guilt consumes me. I should have done something, paid better attention, anything. I can’t help but feel that had I done something none of this would have happened and she wouldn’t be hurt right now.
My poor Addison. I kiss the back of her palm and hold our joined hands up to my forehead. “Please, baby, come back to me. I’m so sorry this happened to you. Just wake up and we’ll figure out the rest, okay?” I whisper to her. I kiss her on the lips and have to fight down the lump in my throat. I can’t lose my shit here. I need to be strong for her.
3 days later
THE THROBBING HEADACHE yanks me away from blissful sleep. That’s funny because I don’t remember what I did the night before that could have caused such a horrible headache. As my eyes are adjusting to the bright lights and begin to focus better I notice two things. One, I am not in my condo. And two, I am at the hospital, only I’m not working my usual shift as a nurse. Instead I am the patient. I look around in confusion searching for a familiar face. Sitting in the chair in the corner is my best friend, Colby. She’s reading something on her phone and her long blonde hair is partially covering her face. She suddenly looks up and her large green eyes meet mine. She jumps out of her chair and makes her way toward me.
“Addison? How are you feeling?” I stare blankly at her as I bite my lip. “Addison, I said how are you feeling?” she says really slow and loud as if I’m deaf.
“Uh, I’m fine, Colby, but why am I here and what happened?”
She has a sad smile on her face as she says, “Look, let me go get a nurse and tell her you’re awake. Your parents just went to get some coffee and should be back shortly.” As Colby leaves to go get a nurse to check my vitals, I wait in total confusion and am slightly alarmed. Why the hell am I in the hospital?
One of my coworkers, Ariana, comes in, my parents shuffling in after her. My mom immediately starts to break down and cry. “Oh, honey! I’m so glad you’re awake! You gave us quite the scare. I was so worried when I got the call that my baby was in the hospital.” My mom was always a bit on the dramatic side. My dad leans over and gives my hand a squeeze.
“Hello pumpkin, how are you feeling? How’s your head?” he asks.<
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Ariana finishes checking my vitals and tells me everything looks good and she is going to get the doctor to let him know I am awake. I give Ariana a smile as she leaves the room.
“Mom, Dad can someone please tell me why I am in the hospital?” My dad, mom, and Colby all look at each other like they are trying to figure out whether or not I am going to break by hearing the answer.
“Pumpkin, you were in a car accident,” my dad responds in a low, gentle tone. His eyes hold some sadness and sympathy as he looks at me waiting for my reaction.
Huh, I definitely was not expecting that. “Okay, so I’m assuming that it was a bad one since I’m here in the hospital with a massive headache.” As the reality of what my father said hits me, I feel frozen in my place, unable to move as my chest starts to tighten.
The constant throbbing in my head brings me out of my frozen state. I reach up to touch it as Dr. Salvatore comes in and says, “Ah, I’d leave that to the professionals, not that you aren’t an excellent nurse here.” This can’t be good. If Dr. Salvatore, head of Neurology, is my doctor that means I must have some kind of head trauma. I tell myself not to panic as I feel the color drain from my face. “Addison, can you tell me how your pain is on a scale of one to ten?” Although my head is throbbing I know if I say ten my mom will freak.
“It’s about an eight, eight and a half.”
Dr. Salvatore gives me an understanding smile since he knows how my mother is due to many late night conversations while at work. “Well, an eight is still pretty high for my liking, so I’m going to send Ariana in with some pain medication. Tell me what you remember about the accident.” I think back to the night before but I can’t remember it for the life of me. I’m beating my brain trying to remember any piece of information to shed light on what happened to me. I’m clenching my jaw and finally let out a sigh in frustration since I keep coming up empty.
