All these issues swirled around him like a swarm of bees. He could bat his defenseless mitts at the pests all he wanted, but they wouldn’t disperse until he figured out where the course ahead lay.
His breathing seemed to even out, as if the weight of his current problems might have lifted. That had to be Gramps.
“What do I do now, Gramps? It’s one thing to realize what a fool I’ve been, but how do I fix this? I can’t let Mom sacrifice her gallery. She lives for it.”
What did he live for? His music? To a point. But while he’d been laid up, unable to sing, it hadn’t been his music that got him through. His mother and the refuge of her home had been there when he needed to escape the press. Besides financial assistance, Mike had offered his advice and his home. Until today, Shae had believed in him and his dream.
He’d begun to make things right with his mother. Until he cleaned up this mess, he couldn’t face Shae. That left Mike.
He’d told both his mother and Mike it would jeopardize Mike’s rebuilt relationship with his family if he loaned Ned money again. But if he was honest with himself, that wasn’t the real reason he’d refused Mike’s help. His pride had prevented him from letting his friend come to his aid. He been unable to accept being the one who needed help yet again. Pride, geez. Such a debilitating emotion. Thanks to his pride, he’d paid a terrible price. He could no longer afford it.
Only one thing left to do. He pulled out his cell and hit a button. “Hi, pal. How’s it going?”
Chapter Twenty-Five
Mike returned to Des Moines around nine that evening. As he and Ned sat around the kitchen island, Mike with a late snack and Ned with water, Ned filled his friend in on all the distasteful details about his collapsed world, which he’d skirted over the phone. “Bottom line—I’ve been a jerk.”
“Naïve fool’s more like it.”
Ned wanted to object but held his tongue. “Yeah, you’re right.”
An amused expression curved a corner of Mike’s mouth. He set down his sandwich, turned to his beer. Ned waited for the lecture Mike had every right to deliver. Instead, Mike asked, “She really fired you?”
“Humiliating, huh? Fired from my own project.”
“For the shit you’ve pulled, she should’ve done it weeks ago.”
“But in front of her crew?”
“Probably to show them she was still in charge.”
“Thought you didn’t like her.”
Mike went back to his sandwich. “Never said that. Didn’t like that you’d entrusted a multi-million-dollar project to someone with no experience. From what you’ve told me about the project, seems to have been the one thing you did right.”
Ned recalled Shae’s first meeting with the crew. Disastrous. She hadn’t wanted to admit she’d invited the crew’s heckling. But she hadn’t given up. Had even gone along with his idea to treat them to lunch as her way to apologize. She’d come a long way since then.
Mike broke into his thoughts. “So? Where do things stand between the two of you?”
“Just told you.”
“Not the firing part. The personal part. Understand in my absence she’s been a guest here several times. Even a few nights.”
“You know?” Damn! They’d been so careful to keep things on the down-low. Now he’d have to suffer through Mike’s warnings not to get involved again.
“Housekeepers do more than dust, buddy. Mine wanted to make sure it was okay. So?”
“It was a convenient arrangement while it lasted. Now, obviously, it’s over.”
Mike cocked his head, studied him. “That for my benefit or yours?”
Ned started to refute Mike’s supposition but heaved a huge sigh instead. “Mine. That was a load of crap. Shae’s no one-night stand or hometown hottie. She’s real. She didn’t deserve the way I treated her.”
“What you gonna do about it?”
Ned shrugged. “She no longer wants a thing to do with me on a personal basis.”
“Gonna let that stop you?”
“Gotta make things right with my business affairs first.”
Mike scrubbed a hand across his face. “Okay, I can buy that. But she’s no Gillian or Julie. That crane fiasco may have pissed her off enough to fire you, but I suspect she did it for you, too, since you weren’t smart enough to see your life crumbling around you. If I had someone care enough about me to risk her father’s company by firing me, even I might consider a more serious relationship with the woman.”
Some admission. “You mean that?”
Mike considered. “Not gonna happen with my crazy lifestyle, but sure.” Then, as if he’d said too much, he changed the subject. “So? What’re we gonna do to get you back on your feet?”
“First, deal with Farley. If you’re still willing to pay him off, like you offered.”
“That’s why I’m here, pal.”
His shoulder muscles relaxed. Until Mike actually confirmed his support, there’d still been a niggling doubt in Ned’s mind. “Thanks. That SOB Farley is history with me.”
“From what you told me about the State’s investigation, may be a moot point, if they bring charges of negligence against him.”
“Won’t break my heart.”
“What else?”
Ned took a long, deliberate breath. He was pretty sure Mike would agree to this next point, but what if he didn’t? Mike was his last option. “What say we team up on this project? I contribute the property and you the money. At least the bulk of it for now. I’m not completely broke, just don’t have enough to continue this project as I’d anticipated. Once my throat recovers and I make personal appearances again, I’ll throw in what I make from that as well.”
Mike started to speak, but Ned stopped him. “Before you say or agree to anything, we’ll do an audit, so you can see the full financial picture.”
“That mean a formal partnership?”
The guy was going to make him say it. “Uh, yeah.”
“Woodley and Collier. I like the sound of it.”
“Collier comes first alphabetically.”
“Woodley has the bucks.”
“Woodley and Collier it is.”
They toasted, water bottle to beer bottle, and the deal was done.
Ned marveled at how easy it had gone down, once he’d gotten past his ego and admitted his mistakes to Mike. There’d be times ahead when Mike would remind him of the mistakes he’d made, but Mike would never remind him that he’d come to his rescue. Not his style.
Mike went to bed once the initial plan for their new partnership had been discussed, despite still being on Pacific Time. However, even with his money problems behind him, restlessness plagued Ned. Something was still off. He felt unsettled.
When sleep wouldn’t come, he found himself once again at his keyboard in the music room. His mind wandered back to the first time he brought Shae to hear his composition. The two of them had thrown caution to the wind that day, as they had ever since, enjoyed each other’s bodies, collapsed in fatigue afterwards, though they’d kept their relationship a secret from everyone else except apparently the Woodley housekeeper, who’d informed Mike.
Even though both his mother and Mike asked about Shae, they’d mercifully let the subject drop when he skated past anything that resembled a straight answer. Nor did either mention the L word. He’d been burned not once but twice by what he thought was love. He no longer believed in commitments, and Shae agreed. After today, she was probably more than happy she had.
Although he and Shae had been lovers, what they shared wasn’t love. Was it? Love was the kind of thing his parents had. Belief in the other person, like when they started the art gallery together. Willingness to see things through together, even when times were bad, like his dad’s illness. Inability to hold back a smile whenever the other person came into the room. He’d witnessed those private looks between his parents many times. Hadn’t really understood them until he was a teen.
He hardly knew Shae. They ha
dn’t even been on a date. Wouldn’t happen now.
His stomach clenched. Maybe he should’ve had a sandwich with Mike. Nah, this ache wasn’t from hunger. Nor was it the queasy sick feeling that had sent him to the side of the road to barf earlier in the day, after Farley pulled the plug. He just felt…empty.
He played the piece he’d shared that day for Shae. Though his mind traveled elsewhere, his recorder continued to run. When he emerged from his woolgathering and listened to what he’d done, the playback shocked him. The same melody was there, but somehow, in his reverie he’d changed the key and the beat. He repeated the playback and afterwards simply sat there, surprised.
Ned had been more than pleased with his progress on the piece when he’d first played it for Shae. But this? This version blew the other out of the water. Had relief about his money problems seeped into his subconscious and freed up his creativity? No, as his hands stroked the keys, he hadn’t thought about the project. His mind had been on Shae.
How about that? His fingers knew better than his brain. He and Shae weren’t over.
****
The following morning, Ned drove Mike to the site to pick up the RV.
“You don’t have to do this,” Mike told him before they started. “I can arrange for someone to return it. Or it can stay for the duration of the project. I don’t need it, and I doubt my parents will be back in town any time soon.”
“Thanks, but I think Shae will rest easier once this reminder of me is off the premises.”
Mike shrugged. “Okay, your call.”
The plan was for Mike to drive the RV back to town with Ned to follow in his own car. Keep it short and sweet and get the hell out of there. Though Ned now knew what he had to do, he wasn’t sure how to get there. Like he did so often in his music, he counted on inspiration to strike when he most needed it.
Upon his arrival, he spotted Shae near the site of his mother’s house. She stared up at the suspect crane. Her father, Dave, and Pete Martin flanked her.
He started their direction, but Mike caught his arm. “You go over there, you’d better be prepared to face the consequences.”
“I just wanted to tell her…” What? That he was sorry? That he didn’t want to lose her? “Meet you back in town.”
“I know it’s too soon to make amends with her, but a guy’s gotta try.”
Mike didn’t stop him.
He caught up with the group before his brain figured out what words to supply his mouth. “Mornin’, folks.”
The three men nodded.
Before he could speak to Shae, to the others she stammered, “I, uh, left some notes back in the office.”
His spirits sank. The knot that had formed in his gut tightened. She definitely hadn’t changed her mind about him. Until then, he hadn’t realized how much he’d hoped she had.
The others didn’t say anything or try to stop her. Her father didn’t even glance in his direction.
“My friend and I are here to pick up his RV. Just wanted you to know I don’t plan to switch to another contractor.”
Shae’s father replied. “Thanks.”
Terse, Well, what did he expect. He’d compromised the integrity of the guy’s company. Nevertheless, he felt compelled to add, “Should you be fined by the State, I plan to reimburse you. Once my friend Mike over there gets the RV back to town, he’ll contact the State to see what we can do to mitigate the charges.”
“Not necessary. I’ve already been in touch with the state people,” Tim Harriman said as if to dismiss him.
So much for his chance to redeem himself in Shae’s eyes. But he had to try. “Don’t blame your daughter for any of this, Tim. She’s done a great job on my project.”
“Yes, she has,” her father said.
Could he sound more awkward and guilty? “Uh, well. Just wanted to let you know.” He pivoted and slinked toward his car. Then it hit him. If they really were over, Shae would’ve stuck around and ignored him. Instead, she’d run off. Not given him a chance to talk to her.
She still cared.
Now or never. This was his best chance to make things right.
Shae stood away from the trailer window and observed the Ned Collier show outside. Or should she call it The Jake Bonneville Show, since he’d clearly assumed his entertainer persona to worm his way back into her father’s good graces. Her chest felt like someone had spilled liquid fire inside. She couldn’t catch her breath. How dare Ned return to the site barely twenty-four hours after he’d subjected them all to professional humiliation and possible charges from the State?
At least her dad and the guys didn’t appear to welcome him. He was the one who talked most, and at times, none of them spoke. What did he expect?
How could she have trusted him? And…and what? Cared for him? Surely her feelings hadn’t evolved beyond that? For Pete’s sake, of course she had feelings for him. Ever since the first time they made love. She’d been so anxious to get him into her bed, she made herself vulnerable to whatever came afterward.
There’d been times, especially when he coached her on how to be a boss, or when he’d listened to her go on about her dad’s lack of support, he’d been so human and understanding. At those times, she’d almost let herself believe more was possible. But the minute he realized he was in over his head monetarily, he’d turned manipulative.
He started to leave. Good. Good riddance.
No, wait. He stopped. Now he was…oh, God, he was headed in her direction!
So he planned to force the issue. Not if she could help it. All she had to do was flip the lock on the door. Surely he wouldn’t make an ass of himself and stand outside and beg to come in?
But she didn’t. And he didn’t. Instead, he simply turned the knob and let himself in.
“I thought I made it clear yesterday your presence on the site would not be appreciated for some time. You adhered to that statement as well as you listened to everything else I’ve told you.”
He pointed his index finger like a gun and shot. “Bingo. That’s been our problem in a nutshell.”
His reaction caught her off guard. What was he up to? “Why are you here, Ned?”
“If you’d remained with your dad and the others, you’d know I drove Mike out to pick up the RV. You don’t want me here, so I’ve come to remove the last vestige of my presence.”
Sounded unexpectedly reasonable. “Oh.” Okay, you’ve said your piece. Now go.
But he didn’t. He edged his way farther into the trailer. She backed up. “Before I go, there are a few things you should know.”
Don’t give an inch. Make him leave now. “And those would be?”
He ticked them off on his fingers, reminiscent of the night she’d pointed out his flaws when they’d shared fast food in her dad’s kitchen. “First, thanks for firing me. You knew before I did that serving as my own project manager was a bad idea.”
“From the first time you mentioned it. Too bad I didn’t stick to my guns.”
“Second, you forced me to face my problems and not attempt to cover them up with bizarre cost-cutting measures. I’ve now told both my mom and Mike about the sorry state of my finances. Should have trusted them with that knowledge ages ago.”
Progress, although overdue. “Glad to hear it.”
“Next, I got rid of Farley. Mike’s my new partner.”
Probably the smartest move he’d made yet. Watch out, Mike, if you have any intention to be part of the decision-making. “He will provide the financing?”
“Yep. So the project’s back on. With Two Rivers Construction as my general contractor. I told your dad as much.”
That was a relief. She’d called it correctly when she recommended they give him a few days to find more backers. Her dad should be thrilled.
“And I love you.”
Her heart bounced. She gulped. “What?”
“Would’ve told you sooner, but I just figured it out myself. How ’bout you?”
“Huh?”
&
nbsp; “Have you figured out you love me yet?”
She backed up farther and fell into her seat. How was she supposed to answer?
Ned moved around to the visitor chair. He leaned into the desk and watched her intently.
“We hardly know each other.”
“I know about that small tat on your back shoulder. Pretty intimate in my book.”
“Okay. Sure. We’ve had sex. Lots. But I thought we agreed on no commitments.”
“Yeah, well, two failed engagements made me commitment-shy. I didn’t think I’d ever find someone I could trust again. What I failed to take into account is neither of those two relationships was real.” He came around the desk and drew her into his arms. “You and I have something far different. Something that’s strong enough to give me the audacity to return to the scene of my incredible folly just to tell you how special you are to me. I don’t want to lose you.”
He loved her? He said something about commitment? She’d barely heard the rest of his words once he said, “I love you.”
Her mind snapped back to the present in time to hear him say, “I want to relocate to Iowa. I have my own lot out here. Did that mainly for my mom. Can’t wait to see it finished and move in.”
“What are you saying, Ned?”
He stared into her eyes. “I’ve said I love you a couple times. I’ve also said our relationship is real. Beyond is up to you.”
“Yes.”
“Yes, what?”
“Yes, I love you, too. I realized it a long time ago, but I thought it would never be reciprocated.”
“Came as a whopping surprise to me. Then I realized it had been in development all along. We just nurtured it the wrong way, limited ourselves just to sex. Not that I minded that part, but like you said, we hardly know each other. We should remedy that.”
The blood pounded in her ears so frantically, she could hardly hear him. “You mean, socially?”
“Yeah. Date. Go to movies, out to dinner, things like that.”
She winced. “As I recall, I didn’t do so well the last time we dined out. I got a bit tipsy, even spilled wine on you.”
Tough Enough to Tango Page 27
