She turned and started for the door, but wasn’t fast enough, much less strong enough. He tackled her, pushing her head first to the ground. Her chest fell to the floor with him in a breath-sucking “thump!” All the air left her body. She clawed at the carpet as he took her hair in his fist and jerked her head backwards, bringing her body up towards him. He stood up, and dragged her with him. She screamed and kicked at the carpet. The hair was nearly ripping out of her scalp. Oh God, stop it! Stop it! Please let the pain stop! She twisted away from his grasp and he suddenly paused before lifting her up almost over his head. She hung helplessly over him before he took his knee and planted it directly into her stomach. She screamed out and he threw her. She fell against the end of the wooden bed frame. Her head slammed into it. Sliding down to the floor, the shock began disorienting her.
He was on top of her, pinning her as he wrapped his hands around her throat. He squeezed and her breath stopped. Her lungs started to convulse. He was choking her. He intended to kill her. The fever was hot in his eyes, and she clawed at his hands. The implosion in her chest was the most painful moment of her life. She closed her eyes as all the air left her, hoping her life would soon end too.
Then he let go. He was breathing hard, and his eyes sparkled with insane excitement. She swallowed a lungful of air as he slammed his fist into her jaw. He did it again to her chest. It cracked against her ribcage.
“If you fucked him, I’ll kill you. You know that, don’t you? You are mine.”
There was no tone to her voice. Her throat was on fire, and there was no sound. He shook her repeatedly. No! No! No! She didn’t fuck him. But it didn’t matter because he didn’t care. He had already decided. Maybe it didn’t matter anymore when he did it. He would kill her one day, no matter what. Was it now? This time?
She clutched the carpet and tried to crawl away, but couldn’t get traction. Tears flowed everywhere, over her cheeks and chin, dripping onto the carpet. The rug burned her knees and palms as she struggled to crawl away. He grabbed her waist to hold her still before his fist connected with her stomach.
She couldn’t take it. She couldn’t withstand it. Not anymore. It was too much pain. The pain ripping through her finally erupted with a garbled scream that escaped her burning throat.
He suddenly slammed her head back into the bed again. She lost all sense of time and space, quickly fading from the scene. She willingly let the blackness take over. She didn’t feel him anymore. She felt nothing. Numbness. Oblivion. It was overwhelming. She couldn’t take anymore. She couldn’t stand it anymore. She couldn’t live through it anymore. She was ready and willing to die.
****
Rolling over, her eyes fluttered open. It was dark. There wasn’t a spark of light. He locked her in the closet. Again. Fuck. She groaned as she felt around with one hand. Yes. She was in their small linen closet. It was just big enough to step into and he stuffed her into the bottom of it. He only did so when he was really mad and his rage had him close to killing her. She touched her head. Gooey liquid was smeared on her forehead and now her finger too. Everything hurt. Her throat still burned and stung, along with her head, her stomach and her legs. Even her scalp stung.
She couldn’t fully stretch out in the tiny closet and he had padlocked the door. He put the lock there himself a year ago during the heat of another rage. He threw her in there, and held it shut as she beat relentlessly in protest. He drilled right through the wood and installed his own lock. He left her in there for only an hour that time. She knew there was no getting out. No yelling for help. It was in their bathroom. Which was, no doubt, locked along with their master bedroom door. He would just tell the staff she was ill and not to be disturbed. They would never dare. She would remain there until he cooled off. She curled back into a ball. Breathe. In and out. In and out.
You are not here. You are not locked in a closet. You are not here. You are not here.
But… she was. Why deny it? She allowed this to happen to her. She returned to him. She never even tried to leave. The tears filled her eyes and slid down her face. Silence. There was no use in calling or screaming or crying. There was no Will Hendricks waiting to rescue her from her dark hole, simply because she told him not to. She told nobody, so she deserved the consequences. The pain in her head, her chest, her back, her neck, and her insides was the punishment, the torture, and the result of her choice to return.
She reached down and pulled her knees up to her chin as far as her aching, bruised body would allow. Let me die. Let me go. Let it be over now. Please.
That was when her denial stopped working.
Chapter Fifteen
Noah might have gone too far by moving Tessa and crew into his house. But he was glad he did. As time passed, she grew marginally stronger each day, and he was glad she was there and no longer in danger. He made sure she got extra police protection now that Dean was free. The response from the police was a surprise to him. They didn’t blow it off, not any of it as Lindsey suggested. It was as serious and felonious as any other crime of violence. So, Tessa and her six kids were under Noah’s care and doing okay. Or as okay as a woman could be who had nothing and no one in the world but strangers to rely on. After being left in the lurch by Lindsey, and with Jessie on full bed rest, he offered Tessa the temporary position at the vet. He wanted Jessie to return as soon as she could with no intention of having her replaced. But he figured Tessa could handle the tasks, or at least a limited version of the tasks until he could find something more permanent for her. However, when he suggested it to Tessa, she looked at him as if he just started speaking in foreign tongues until he explained his plan.
“Are you on drugs, Dr. Clark?”
His eyes brows furrowed in puzzled confusion at her response to his plan. “What? No. Why would you say that?”
“Because no one does that! No one but you would put up a woman and her six kids at your own expense and then offer me a job. Not to mention your time, your dogs, and your kindness and care. My God, you can’t do this for everyone who happens to be down on their luck.”
He put a hand gently to her shoulder and she flinched, but let him keep it there. Progress. It reminded him of how jumpy Lindsey was at first with him. She eventually learned to trust him and calm down too. “You were far worse off than just down on your luck, Tessa.”
“Perhaps, but still. It’s more than decent of you. I’ll try to do your job. I can’t say as I’ll be any good at it. I’ve never worked before. I left my daddy’s farm, and went straight to Dean.”
“You can do it. I’ll teach you.” Huh. That was so strange. She sounded a lot like Lindsey.
“Is she coming back soon?”
He frowned. Tessa would not let Lindsey go and desperately wanted her to come back. “No, Tessa, she’s not coming back anytime soon. You might as well forget you ever met her.”
“Forget I met her? She saved my life, Dr. Clark. She saved it! I never had anyone I could go to. Not until she came to me. Not until she lied to Dean, and got away with it. If a woman like her, who understood what I lived through, could stand up so brashly to Dean, well, it made me consider that maybe I could stand up to him too.”
“Her charity work was the thing that brought out the most emotion in her I ever witnessed. I have to admit, I told her to leave your situation alone. I was wrong, Tessa. I see that now, and I’m sorry, I almost didn’t help you. She was right.”
“Charity work don’t make a girl like her seek out a woman like me. She recognized it only because she lived it.”
“Lived it? No. What do you mean?”
“The scars. Her past relationship. She told me. I wouldn’t have told her otherwise.”
“No, Tessa you misunderstood. She does charity work with a battered woman’s shelter near her home.”
“I didn’t misunderstand the burn scar on her arm. I didn’t misunderstand it; she lived it.”
He jerked back and his breath faltered. No. Not Lindsey… no.
He stared
at Tessa, but was unable to think one coherent thought. Suddenly, Lindsey’s entire personality started to click through his brain like still photos in an album. Lindsey getting so startled anytime he came near her and flinching whenever he touched her shoulder unexpectedly, just as Tessa did. Lindsey being too scared to move, to make coffee, or to answer a phone. Lindsey taking ten calls a day from her husband, no matter what she was doing, or who she was with. Lindsey begging him to let her continue doing it. Lindsey standing before Elliot and lying about her entire month spent working for him. Lindsey being held against her husband, and unable to move her head back. Lindsey… with scars? He shut his eyes and his entire body collapsed with sadness as he stared at the floor.
“She… told you she was abused?”
“Yes. A long time ago. She managed to get out.”
No. She got you out. Noah knew it with as much certainty as he had blue eyes. Suddenly, finally, he knew exactly why she became so frantically determined to help Tessa. It was really a way of helping herself, because she had no intention of helping herself. He fisted his hands and his heart pounded loudly inside his ribcage. My God, she even said it to him, and he paid no more attention to her than he did to Tessa.
Oh, for God’s sake, Noah, this is everywhere. In every small or large town. You know women being beaten. You talk to them every day. You just don’t know it. Not usually. I just want to help this one woman.
A knot formed in his throat. Shit. He was close to crying. The tears welled up behind his eyes and started choking him. He managed to miss every single flare she sent off. Even after meeting the disturbing, dominating, awful man, he still didn’t see what was plainly before his eyes.
And now, she was there with him, all alone, and not one person knew. He jerked up from his slouched position and stood up in a rush. “I’m sorry, Tessa, I have to go. Come to the clinic tomorrow morning and we’ll talk more then. Right now, I have to be somewhere.”
She watched him wearily and her eyes grew wide and then dimmed. “It wasn’t in the past for her, was it? It is now. She is me.”
He licked his lips. “Yes. She is you.”
Tessa shook her head. “I don’t understand. How could a woman like that put up with it? She…”
“Doesn’t look like a victim? That’s just the point, isn’t it? It can be any woman you talk to every single day. It’s everywhere. And no one wants to see it, or get involved.”
“She did though. She got involved. Why? Why did she help me?”
“Because she can’t help herself. You must stay away from Dean. You must keep your kids away. You must get well and make a new life now. If not for yourself, or your kids, then do it for her. She wanted that for you. She risked everything to make that happen for you. Now, you know why. Don’t waste it.”
Tears filled Tessa’s eyes, and Noah realized he had not yet seen her shed a tear. Not over her browbeaten kids, or having to go to the shelter, or because Dean was still alive. Nothing. The thought of Lindsey helping her touched her so much and she shook her head. “Only if you promise to help her.”
He started for the door. “That’s exactly what I intend to do.”
****
“Did she ever burn herself on her arm?”
Jessie jerked up with surprise. She was resting on the couch, which was now made up with sheets and a pillow. It was obvious she had been there awhile. Her hair was matted to her head, and she blinked in tired confusion at his presence. He literally barged through her front door.
Will came in from the kitchen, rushing in obvious worry. He stopped dead when he noticed Noah. “Noah? What the hell, man?”
Noah barely glanced at him, but put his hands on his hips and clung to Jessie’s gaze. “Did your sister ever burn her arm? Is there a scar on her arm that you know of?”
Jessie shook her head, obviously clearing out the cobwebs and trying to make sense of his presence. “Lindsey? Burn herself? No. Never. She has no scars that I have ever seen. What is this?”
He started pacing. He wanted to punch his fist through the wall. He stopped and took a deep breath when he caught Jessie’s eyes filling with trepidation. She hobbled around the couch closer to him. Will set down the spatula he was holding and came closer.
Noah fell onto the couch, and rubbed his hand over his face. “He hurts her. Elliot hurts her. At some point, he burned a scar on her arm. She didn’t leave here a snobby bitch, too good for this place and us, but a woman denying her reality, lest anyone discover her awful secret.”
Jessie doubled over and Will rushed to her. He took her in his arms as Jessie was already convulsing in tears. There was no hesitation. No denial. No trying to reason with Noah that he was wrong. As Jessie well knew, there was plenty of violence in the world. There was also torture. And she knew Noah spoke the truth. He simply put the puzzle of her sister together, and in an instant, Jessie knew what she missed. Just as Lindsey missed Jessie’s abuse all those years ago.
Tears choked Jessie. Will led her to the couch and set her down carefully. He stroked her neck and back as he talked into her ear, trying to soothe her. She nodded and finally took in shuddering gasps of air until she calmed down enough to speak, the tears still streaming from her eyes. “How could I not know? How could I let her leave with him? How could I be so fucking stupid? Blind! I let him take her. I let her be taken. She was begging for me to notice and all I did was let my stupid, hurt feelings deny what was right there in front of me.”
Oh, for God’s sake, Noah, this is everywhere. In every small or large town. You know women being beaten. You talk to them every day. You just don’t know it. Not usually. I just want to help this one woman.
He couldn’t stop her words from streaming over and over in his brain. Over and over, her voice and the pleading he saw in her eyes, her beautiful blue eyes, so passionate about this one subject. And the disappointment in him was clear as she glared at him over Tessa. How could he miss what Lindsey was really saying? She wanted him to help her.
Will let Jessie go and he stood up. “He’ll be dead by tomorrow.” His voice was calm, quiet, and as smooth as a hot steak knife cutting through butter.
Jessie grabbed his hand. “No. No. Don’t be stupid, Will. You can’t do that.”
“I most sure as fuck can.”
Noah shook his head. “You’re not a soldier anymore, Will. You don’t get to put on your war pack and rappel in to save her. You do that and you’ll get brought up on murder charges and spend the rest of your life in prison, which would only ruin Jessie’s too.”
Will crossed his arms over his chest. “You think I’d get caught?”
“I think, you have a baby about to be born at any minute. Literally. Her due date is three days from now, Will. You can’t leave your wife.”
Will shut his eyes as Noah’s logical reason hit home. “I know. I just, I could kill the fucker. I could. Why didn’t she tell me? I asked her. I outright asked her about Elliot. I always hated the cold, slimy, rich, prick, son of a bitch. He rubbed me the wrong way the first time she had us over for dinner after he returned from his deployment. He wore a uniform, but with just one glance, and one word, I knew he was no soldier. He was nothing but a cold fuck. I didn’t know what his agenda was then, but I knew he definitely had one.”
“Perhaps for that very reason, she didn’t tell you,” Noah pointed out gently.
Jessie stared at her palms. “She didn’t think it would do any good. She thinks he’ll eventually find her at some point, no matter what she does or where she goes. He has complete control of her. We all saw it. The fucking cell phone? I mean who takes calls so desperately? And what did I do about that? I got annoyed at her for taking them. For being such a doormat. She couldn’t even tell him she worked for you! How could none of us see the flares she was firing from her sinking ship? She was here, away from him, and getting stronger every day. I saw the change in her as soon as he showed up. It was instantaneous. It was freakish. It was complete submission for her. Just as my father
had over me. I was his, to do with as he wanted, and I believed no one could change that. Lindsey believes that too. And we all, every one of us, let her go without voicing one word or question. God, we should be shot! I’m her sister. I went through this shit! She saved me from the same shit, and I couldn’t recognize it in her?”
Will touched her palms, separating her hands without a word of rebuke. “We didn’t see it. It’s not all on you. It doesn’t matter. What matters now is what we do.”
“Do? Noah’s right. I can’t go. Look at me. But you can, Will. You have to go. Another day can’t pass while she’s there, completely at his mercy.”
“No. No, I’ll go. You can’t go through this alone, Jessie. You need Will here. He must stay here. But I can go and I am going.”
Jessie’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. Will slowly rose and stretched his hand out to Noah. “I would go under any other circumstances.”
Noah shook Will’s hand. It was almost like Will was passing Noah an imaginary torch of rescue. The thing was: Noah was not Will Hendricks. He had no illusions about that and knew he was completely ill-suited for the role of savior. He shrugged. “Doesn’t matter. I’d go no matter what you were doing. I’ll let you know.”
He turned and left. He was finished debating. He was over feeling sorry for what they had not done. All that mattered is what he did now. Today. Forward. And first thing was to get the fuck to the airport.
****
Elliot opened the padlock hours later. It clicked down and the bi-fold door slid open. Light filled the closet and Lindsey blinked at the painful sensation to her eyeballs. He hunkered down on his haunches and reached his arms out. Gathering her up, he pulled her to his chest and tenderly cradled her in his arms.
She lay there mute, numb, defenseless. It didn’t matter. She stared over his shoulder at the toilet as his hand touched her forehead and his finger gently prodded the lump. He sighed deeply and stood up. She soon felt the cool whisper of sheets against her skin. Breathing still hurt. Her head swam and her entire body was on fire.
The Good Sister (Sister Series, #2) Page 18
