by J. L. Berg
Beyond These Walls
Copyright © 2015 by J.L. Berg
All rights reserved.
Cover Designer: Okay Creations
Photography: K. Keeton Design
Editors: Jovana Shirley, Unforeseen Editing, Ami Deason, Book Glam by Ami
Interior Designer: Champagne Formats
No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system without the written permission of the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.
Visit my website at www.jlberg.com
ISBN-13: 978–0-9903460–7-4
Title Page
copyright
Other Books by the Author
dedication
prologue
one—An Unexpected Visitor—Lailah
two—Growing Pains—Jude
three—Change the World—Lailah
four—Cooking Is Hard—Jude
five—Doctors and Leftovers—Lailah
six—See You Later—Jude
seven—Rise and Shine—Lailah
eight—Restless in New York—Jude
nine—Angels in Winter—Lailah
ten—A Night to Remember—Jude
eleven—Mr. and Mrs.—Lailah
twelve—Perfect Mess—Jude
thirteen—Restraint—Lailah
fourteen—A Mile High—Jude
fifteen—Fire and Ice—Lailah
sixteen—Toes, Sand, and Sea—Jude
seventeen—A Late Christmas Gift—Lailah
eighteen—Fight—Jude
nineteen—Flight—Lailah
twenty—Crossroads—Jude
twenty-one—Sea of Emotions—Lailah
twenty-two—California Calm—Jude
twenty-three—We’re Going to Disneyland—Lailah
twenty-four—Sandy—Jude
twenty-five—Let’s Make a Deal—Lailah
twenty-six—Tick, Tick . . . Boom—Jude
twenty-seven—Lights Out—Lailah
twenty-eight—Megan—Jude
twenty-nine—The New Normal- Lailah
epilogue
Other Books by the Author
Behind Closed Doors
Beyond These Walls—Playlist
Acknowledgments
About the Author
Other Books by J.L. Berg
The Ready Series
When You’re Ready
Ready to Wed
Never Been Ready
Ready for You
Ready or Not
Within These Walls
For Julie Fleming,
May we meet again sweet friend, but for now ... this one is for you.
THE COOL OCEAN air rushed through the hills, tousling my hair and sending a chill up my spine, as we climbed a bit higher toward our destination.
“How are you doing?” Jude asked.
With his hand firmly wrapped around mine, we traveled through the vibrant green grass.
“Good, really good.” I smiled as my hand danced across the tops of purple wildflowers scattered everywhere. I took a deep breath through my lungs, letting the air swirl around my rib cage, and said a small prayer of thanks, knowing there had been a time in my life when a simple deep breath wasn’t possible.
“We’re almost there. Do you see it?” he asked, pointing with his free hand toward the water’s edge.
“Oh my gosh, yes!” I exclaimed.
In the distance, overlooking the ocean was a small church—or the remains of one. Three walls still stood, and as we walked closer, I could see the remnants of the fourth spread across the ground in piles. The roof and floor were long gone, but in its place, nature had taken over. Tiny daisies and beautiful blue sky had woven perfectly through the weathered foundation and walls, creating something that seemed almost part of the land.
Neither of us spoke for a long while. We just stood in the center, absorbing its quiet beauty. This was how I’d always imagined it. When I’d sat in my hospital bed, fantasizing about faraway places and exotic trips to destinations unknown, this was what I’d always pictured in my head.
And here I was, standing in my own dream.
Because of Jude.
I turned, and our eyes met. There, in the middle of the church, surrounded by wildflowers as waves crashed below us, the love of my life dropped to one knee.
“What are you doing?” I asked, my voice shaky and thin, as I looked down at him.
“Exactly what I’ve wanted to do since the moment I met you.”
“I don’t know what to say.”
“Don’t say anything.” He smiled warmly. “Just listen.”
I nodded as he took my hands in his own.
“I know you think that I saved you, but in all honesty, it was you who saved me. Anyone with the same amount of wealth could have paid for that surgery. It wasn’t hard. But you pulled me out of the darkness. If it weren’t for you, I would have spent the rest of my life in that hospital, hating myself for the mistakes of my past. You are my light, my angel, and now, I want to make you my wife. Please say yes, Lailah. Please make me the happiest man alive and marry me.”
Tears welled up in my eyes as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a tiny black ring box. As he lifted the lid, I felt my new heart skip a beat at the sight of the dazzling ring tucked inside.
Traditional and timeless, it was exactly what I would have picked out. I couldn’t help but reach out and run my fingers over the top of the single solitaire set on a thin gold band.
“Yes,” I answered softly as happy tears trickled down my face.
I watched as he slipped the ring on my left hand. It was a perfect fit. Happiness and joy shone in his eyes as he stood, scooping me up into his arms. I knew forever with him was exactly where I should be.
“I love you,” I said, running my hands through his messy blond hair.
“I love you—hey, did you hear that?”
What? That’s not how this is supposed to go.
“Hear what?” I asked.
“I swear, I heard a child cry out. Didn’t you hear it?”
“No, I don’t think so.”
This never happened.
Dread flared to life in my chest as he looked around.
“Come on. Let’s go look.”
Suddenly, I heard the faint cry of a child. I looked around, but all I saw were hills and miles and miles of green countryside.
Another cry.
“Wait, I think it came from over here!” I pointed and turned right, which took us farther inland toward a group of trees.
I don’t remember a forest.
We entered the large cluster of trees, and suddenly, it grew dark. The tall tree limbs seemed to come to life, reaching out for us, as we walked deeper and deeper.
“I think I heard it again,” Jude said, moving faster.
His speed approached a run, and I tried to keep up. Huge tree roots leaped out of the group, blocking my path, and soon, we were separated.
“Jude!” I cried, looking right and left.
“Lailah! I’m right here!”
“I can’t see you!”
I turned around in circles, the rising panic taking over.
“Jude!” I screamed. Feeling my breath beginning to weaken, I stood frozen in place as the dark walls of the forest began to close in around me.
<
br /> The child cried out again, and this time, it was a cry of anguish. I suddenly felt torn.
Where do I go? Who do I run toward?
“Jude! Help me!” I managed to say before collapsing.
Seconds later, the darkness swallowed me whole.
“LAILAH,” A VOICE called out in the darkness. “Wake up, angel. You’re having another bad dream.”
The fog began to lift, and I slowly opened my eyes. Looking down at me with an equal mixture of concern and amusement was Jude. A hand gently combed through my messy hair as a smile crept its way across his handsome face.
“There you are,” he said.
“Hi,” I answered back, stretching slightly as the last lingering bits of grogginess melted away.
“Same one?” he asked, obviously referring to the nightmare he’d awoken me from.
“Yeah,” I confirmed.
“You know, if it weren’t for the upcoming wedding and the untold stress I know it’s having on your system, I’d be a little concerned about the fact that my extremely romantic proposal has somehow turned into a recurring nightmare in which you get swallowed whole by an evil forest.”
“Believe me, it’s not by choice,” I said, a shudder running down my spine at the mere thought of those shadowy tree limbs.
“We could still elope.” His eyebrow perked in challenge.
“Our families would kill us.”
“Only if they could find us,” he answered quickly.
“You’ve already spent a fortune on it,” I argued.
“We’ve spent a fortune. Say it with me, Lailah. We’ve spent a fortune. You are my fiancée—my soon-to-be wife,” he reiterated. “Everything I have is yours—ours, remember?” He pulled me closer to his chiseled side.
I nuzzled in closer and sighed.
“Okay, fair enough. Since it’s our money, I must protest against such a blatant waste of our funds. So, no elopement, buddy,” I said, pinching his side for effect.
“Ouch!” He laughed. “As long as it all ends with someone saying, ‘I now pronounce you husband and wife’ I’m fine with whatever you decide.”
“You’d really forgo everything and marry me tomorrow?”
Rolling over, he pinned me beneath him, encapsulating me between his strong muscular arms. My fingers instinctively traveled up over the intricate black ink of his arm.
“In a heartbeat. But you’re right. Our mothers would kill us if we didn’t let them witness this day. So, we will be good, and I’ll give you the wedding you’ve always dreamed of. And then, my bride to be, you and I will spend the next three weeks in . . . oh, right. I can’t tell you. It’s a surprise.”
I shook my head, letting out a puff of air in frustration. “Jerk.”
“Such language.” He laughed.
“Why does it have to be a surprise, Jude?” I whined, wrapping my arms around him. “Ireland was enough of a surprise for an entire lifetime. You don’t have to keep trying to dazzle me,” I said.
His head lowered, and I felt the wisp of his lips touch my cheek.
“Actually I do,” he whispered. “Every day for the rest of our lives, I’m going to do just that. You deserve to be dazzled, Lailah.”
Momentarily stunned by his words, I just stared up at him, lost in his warmth and love.
“Could you at least tell me what to pack?” I asked, a shy grin creeping across my face.
“Mmm . . . no,” he responded. Immediately, he chuckled as he watched the look of frustration cross my features. “I could, however, provide you with a guide.”
“A guide?” I asked, my face going blank in confusion. “Is this one of those rich-people things? Are you going to stick me with a snooty personal shopper, Jude? Because I’d rather end up with a bag my mother packed—or just a bag honestly.”
“Really? You don’t want a personal shopper? Because the one I had in mind is perfect for you,” he said with a mischievous grin. He quickly kissed my cheek and hopped off the bed to begin his morning routine.
“No,” I answered, sitting up fully and firmly crossing my arms across my chest.
Since moving to New York, I’d been forced to grow accustomed to many things—city life, the lack of trees, people constantly wearing black for some unknown reason. But the biggest adjustment was Jude’s money.
He’d come to me as Jude, the quiet nursing assistant. What had started out as a simple friendship within the walls of a quiet hospital had blossomed into a love so unlike anything I could have ever imagined. I’d soon discovered the broken man who worked the lonely halls of Memorial Regional in Santa Monica was actually the heir to a multibillion-dollar corporation. Hiding from a past filled with pain, Jude had run from the duties and obligations of his family and hated himself for it.
It’d turned out that I wasn’t the only one with scars.
Jude had saved me, in more ways than one, and in turn, I guessed I had done the same. But living with a billionaire was never a life I’d envisioned for myself. Sometimes, when things had gotten rough and sickness had taken over or I had been told that another procedure was needed for my heart, I had often wondered whether a life, any life, would be possible at all.
All I wanted was Jude. Whether he was a janitor, a nursing assistant, or one of the richest men in the country, he would always be the man who had snuck into my room with a chocolate pudding cup in his hand.
“What if,” Jude said, his smirk growing wider, “I said that this particular personal shopper was flying in especially for you?”
“That, in fact, makes it worse,” I said, making a sour face.
“All the way from Santa Monica?”
My eyes widened. “Grace?”
He answered with an enthusiastic nod.
I jumped out of bed and threw myself into his arms. “Are you serious? When? Where? How?”
We fell back into bed, laughing. “Yes, I’m serious. She’s flying in today. In fact, her flight landed a while ago. So, you’d better get your ass in the shower because she’ll be arriving at our door in a few minutes. Oh, and she’s bringing the baby. You’re welcome.”
I squealed, hugging him and scattering kisses across his adorable face. “You are amazing!” I exclaimed.
Grabbing my face between his hands, our eyes locked, and I felt him sober slightly. The buzz of our happiness zinging between us reduced to a hum as he pulled me toward him.
“No, it is you who amazes me—constantly, daily, every minute. I love you, Lailah, and I can’t wait to make you my wife.”
As his lips touched mine, I was the one who was truly dazzled.
“So, you’re sticking with green for my dress?” Grace asked as we wandered down the streets of Manhattan.
“Yes.” I laughed. “You asked me that last week, you know.”
“I know.” She sighed, bundling up baby Zander and bringing him a little closer to her chest.
Grace had stumbled into motherhood with little mishap. It had shaken her perfectly planned world slightly—having a creature who cried and slept whenever and wherever he chose—but she and her husband, Brian, had adapted well, and Zander was flourishing. I’d always seen Grace with a girl. She was so feminine and dainty, earning the nickname Snow White at the hospital where she worked as a nurse, but seeing her now, with her charming little boy, made perfect sense. He was the calming blue yin to her bedazzled pink yang.
“But I thought that, maybe after my constant whining, you might have changed your mind,” she added, making a goofy face in Zander’s direction.
He laughed in glee at his mother’s silliness.
“You mean, your constant badgering to change the color to pink?” I asked, looking across the street to a rare cluster of trees.
They had begun to change color, fading from green to a fiery orange, which contrasted starkly against the dark grays of the buildings in the background.
“It wasn’t pink exactly. More of a pale blush color. Think of it as a winter pink.” She smiled.
“Wi
nter pink? Now, you’re stretching it, Grace.” I laughed. “You know why I love green.”
“Yes, it matches Jude’s eyes, which is romantic and beautiful and goes great with the wedding’s Christmas theme, but you can’t blame a girl for trying.”
“I’ll give you extra points for persistence,” I added, pointing toward the store we had talked about at lunch.
“Yes! That’s the one! We should find lots of honeymoon stuff there, huh?” she exclaimed. She was doing that strange thing parents sometimes did where they were simultaneously speaking to an adult and their child at the same time. The conversation was geared toward the adult, but the octave of the voice and the overly expressive facial features suggested otherwise.
It was both weird and adorable at the same time.
The three of us entered the large store and began browsing. It was exactly the type of store I was comfortable in. No one came rushing over to judge how much money I was about to spend. I was left alone to roam through the racks with Grace as we carried on a casual conversation, catching up on our lives.
“So, how is life in the cardiac unit?” I asked.
She held up a long-sleeved sweater with fur trim. I shook my head and laughed as Zander reached out from his BabyBjörn for the fuzzy brown collar.
“Well, we haven’t had a prom in a while,” she said with a toothy grin. “But it’s good,” she answered. “A little lonely without my favorite patient, but I wouldn’t want it any other way.”
“At least you still have Marcus,” I said.
“Yes, I do. Having your mother and him around is like having an extra set of grandparents. They are really wonderful, Lailah.”
“Well, I didn’t expect otherwise.”
The next item she held up for my inspection was a ruby-red bikini. My eyes bugged as they fell on the two barely there scraps of fabric.
“First, a sweater built for arctic weather, and now, a bikini? Where exactly is he taking me?”
Her grin widened. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”
My face fell slightly as I contemplated my answer. “He didn’t overdo it, did he? I mean, he knows he doesn’t have to always offer up these crazy romantic gestures. I’ll love him no matter what.”
