“What does that have to do with not telling me?”
“She was my best friend and it ripped my heart out. I vowed I would never put myself in a position to be hurt like that by a woman ever again. But I didn’t know it.” He looked down and massaged his fist with his other hand. “I knew it, but I didn’t know it. Not till yesterday after the hike. I’d buried it and didn’t face it when the wedding date was racing up on us. It was like I couldn’t control what I was doing. I didn’t want to do it but had to at the same time. Do you understand?”
“I’m sorry about what happened with your mom, but I’m not her.”
“I know.”
They sat in silence till Dana shifted forward as if she was about to leave.
“Have you forgiven me?”
Dana closed her eyes and sighed. “Yes.”
“Truly?”
“Yes, Brandon, I have.” She opened her eyes and fixed her gaze on him, then spoke just above a whisper. “But if I went into a lion’s cage and he mauled me, I can forgive the lion for what he did. But it doesn’t mean I’m going to get back in the cage and hope it doesn’t happen again.” She slapped her hands on her legs. “Are we done?”
Dana didn’t wait for an answer. She rose and clomped back up the path to the main cabin. Brandon stood and scrambled down the bank to the river and walked north. Ice cubes were warmer than her reaction. But what had he expected? Her to wrap her arms around him while the birds sang the “Hallelujah Chorus” and the sun broke through the clouds to illuminate them with a beam of light? But he’d told her. For the moment maybe that was enough.
Marcus sat at the listening post late that afternoon and pulled out the photo of Kat and the girls he’d shown Dana. Tonight Abbie would cavort down the field without him on the sidelines. He should be there. Right now he should be standing beside Kat and Jayla, blistering his lungs with shouts of encouragement. Maybe Abbie didn’t care if he was there or not. But he cared. And deep down he believed she did too.
Yes, he’d changed. But so many years had been wasted. The moments he’d missed that were gone forever. His girls’ first steps. Their first words. T-ball games, Soccer Tots, the award ceremonies in grade school, the school play where they were both tomatoes.
Never building the tree house he’d promised them. The Disney World trip that was always going to happen the next year. Yes, they’d made the excursion last year and it was good, but why didn’t he create the time when they were still children and he could have seen the uninhibited wonder on their faces?
He pinched the bridge of his nose and tried to fight the thoughts. Tried to take them captive. Tried to grant himself forgiveness and put the past in the past, tried to tell himself there was nothing that could be done about deeds already done, but it was like attempting to dam up the river below him with two small stones. The thoughts kept coming and surged around his feeble attempts to fight them.
“I must get free of this, Lord. Living in the past creates a barrel of iron that weights down the present with great heft.”
Marcus continued to pray but peace eluded him, and he stared at the cabin as the lights inside grew brighter against the darkening sky. The glass door slid open and Reece’s huge frame was silhouetted against the light. “You coming in, Marcus?”
“Yes. Soon.”
The big man closed the door behind him and eased down the path till he stood at the edge of the patio. He glanced from left to right, then focused his eyes on Marcus and pointed at his head. “Up here you understand there is no profit in dwelling on the past.” He pointed to his chest. “But this is where you need to know it to be free.”
“I have no understanding of how to create that reality.”
“The destruction of your chains is coming, Marcus.”
“How do you know?”
“’The Son of God appeared for this purpose, to destroy the works of the devil.’” Reece held out his hand and Marcus grasped it. “First John 3:8.”
The big man pulled him out of his chair and grabbed him in a tight embrace. “And he is ready to war for you. Of this, I have no doubt.”
TWENTY-FIVE
WEDNESDAY NIGHT AFTER DINNER REECE GATHERED them around the fire pit at the listening post to talk, and Brandon tried to guess the topic. Probably to talk about what they could expect when they returned to Seattle. He hadn’t gotten his name. Tension was still thick between Dana and him. But he’d faced the issue of his mom and uncovered why he hadn’t been feeling anything. He still was out of touch with his emotions, but at least now he knew why. And he sensed breakthrough was coming.
After the fire roared to life, Reece said, “We’re going to talk about next steps, but first, Brandon, would you be up for leading us in a few songs?”
“Love to.” Brandon smiled.
He picked up his guitar and strummed a chord, letting it linger in the air, then launched into “Running Wild in Search of Wonder,” a song he’d written when he was sixteen and hadn’t played in years. By the time he got to the chorus the second time, the others picked up the words and melody and joined it. Reece sounded like a wounded rhino but he sang with passion, and in that moment it was all Brandon cared about.
Marcus had a nice voice and Dana’s lilting alto brought him back to the days they used to sing together. He’d always told her she was good enough to sing backup on his songs—but the timing never worked out to get her into the studio.
And as he played, a sense of the old days crept into his soul. The joy of a song. The sense of Jesus in it. Just a sense, but the hope it offered was a geyser. After the song ended, he stopped and let them soak in the presence of God.
“Into this, Lord. Into this. Invade us. Take us deeper into your unquenchable love.”
Two songs later he held his fingers on the frets of his guitar and let the final chord slowly fade into the night.
“That was a treasure, Brandon. Thank you.” Reece tossed a stick on the fire, then rested his gaze on each of them in turn.
“You’ve done well during this first phase. There has been breakthrough for each of you. Your eyes have opened to what is possible with God and the vastness of the spiritual realm. When we get home and start the next part of your training, I believe he’ll continue to open your eyes to things around you you’ve never seen.
“Healing has begun in you. Back in Seattle you’ll begin bringing that healing and freedom to those around you.” He picked up another stick and smacked it into his palm. “That’s the good news.”
“And the bad?” Dana asked.
“Even before we got to Well Spring, our quest was noticed by the enemy. He tried to keep each of us from coming. He succeeded with Tamera and she was taken out. His goal going forward will be to take out the rest of you. In subtle ways, in overt ways. We need to be ready.”
“Great,” Brandon said.
“So be alert. He’s prowling. He wants to shred you. Stay strong, stay in prayer, don’t let yourself be isolated. You start feeling alone in this”—Reece glanced at Dana—“you call me or one of the others immediately and pray together against it.”
Dana nodded.
“I’m proud of all of you.” Reece stood. “Try to get some sleep tonight. We leave tomorrow morning at ten.”
Dana wandered down to the horseshoe pit early on Thursday morning, then over to the field ringed by the seven small cabins. She wanted to take one more stroll around the ranch and soak up the solitude. Maybe take a few more photos before doing her final packing for home. She smiled. Her enjoying solitude? The healing had truly begun.
As she sauntered back along the path above the river, she spotted Reece sitting on the edge of the embankment, a camera held up to his eye, a deep red strap draped around his neck. A few yards from him, she snapped a twig and he turned.
“May I join you?”
“Of course.” He released the camera against his chest and motioned to a spot on the ground beside him.
“I didn’t know you were a photographer.” She
sat and stretched out her legs.
“I’ve taken a few shots over the years. How about you?” He motioned to her camera.
“Actually, yes. I’ve dabbled in it off and on—but never gotten serious.” She looked at the river. “I don’t want to interrupt your shot.”
“The light won’t be perfect for at least a few minutes.”
“How do you know when it is?”
“I don’t. I guess and most of the time I get it wrong. But every so often I get it right.” Reece clasped his arms around his legs and took a quick look at the sun.
“Have you ever put any of your shots up for sale?”
He looked at her with a quizzical expression. “I’ve sold a few over the years.”
Dana glanced at his photography bag, did a double take, and stared at the lettering along the side. It couldn’t be, could it?
“Where did you get that?” She pointed at the bag.
“Why?”
“You’re not really him, are you?”
“Hmm?”
She jabbed her finger at the bag. “Roth Photography. Galleries in exotic locales around the world. Multiple celebrities with Roth photos in their homes. The photography legend with no first name. And no shots of himself anywhere to be found.”
“I have the same last name as the guy. Is that what you mean?”
It had to be him. She shook her head in disbelief, leaned back on her hands, and stared up at the mountains across the river. “How did I miss it? In all the time I’ve known you, I’ve never really thought about your last name. I’ve always known you simply as Reece.” She turned to him. “It’s you, isn’t it?”
He stared out over the river. “Guilty.”
She’d always wondered what he did for a living. The time she asked when they met he’d said, “I’m in business,” and she never pressed for details. It wasn’t important. Unbelievable. Reece was Roth Photography.
“You’re a legend.” Dana turned and sat cross-legged.
“You already said that.”
“It’s true.”
“Only in some people’s minds.”
“Brandon and Marcus will be floored.” Dana glanced at the bag again. “They think you barely make it meal to meal. Marcus keeps trying to figure out how you paid for first-class tickets and how you can afford this place for a week.” She motioned at the ranch.
“I own Well Spring, Dana.”
“What?” She blinked.
“I thought it was obvious and one of you would have figured it out by now. I had it built a number of years ago.”
“Of course you did.” She laughed.
“It was to be a training center.”
“What happened?”
Darkness passed over Reece’s face. “It still will be.”
Dana looked toward the main cabin. “I can’t wait to tell them.”
“Don’t. Please. I don’t want them thinking I’m somebody I’m not.”
“Somebody you’re not? You’re a world-famous photographer.”
“No, I’m not that person anymore. That was a life I walked away from ten years ago.”
“You don’t own the galleries anymore?”
“No. I sold them for a very fair price.”
“A new one just opened in Maui.”
“I’d heard that.” Reece lifted his camera and turned it on Dana. “Do you mind?”
She shook her head and the shutter fired before she was done.
“Do you miss the business?”
“Not at all. My love was never the shops or the business or the money. It was photos. It’s being there live, seeing it, experiencing it, storing the moment in my soul.”
Reece pointed to his eyes. “These are the most sophisticated cameras ever designed.” He tapped his camera. “This can’t come within a light-year of what our eyes experience.”
“So that’s the best part for you?”
“Without question, the rush comes from capturing an image at that perfect time, when the shadows and the light are at their most ideal. Capturing a moment of God’s wasteful, lavish, extravagant artistry that he splashes across the earth every day.”
“Wasteful?”
“Think of the most stunning sunset you’ve ever seen. It’s there for a moment, then wiped from the sky minutes later. And he does it again and again and again. Have you ever asked why? Why such staggering beauty? Do we need it to live? To breathe? To eat? No. But he can’t help it. It’s his nature to pour out on us beauty that stirs our deepest longings and desires.” He paused and snapped another shot of her.
“Stop that.”
“When I find a captivating subject it’s hard to resist.” Reece gazed at the river. “It’s why I believe God’s greatest gift to us is sight. I would miss the smell of piñon wood crackling in the fire pit. I would miss hearing the sparrow’s song. I would miss being able to hike through thick groves of Douglas fir or touch the dew on the grass on a summer morning. I would miss not being able to speak, but I would struggle to live without my eyes.”
“I feel exactly the same.” Dana took her photos for the same reasons. But she’d never heard it expressed so eloquently. Reece said he didn’t have a way with words. He was wrong. Dana glanced at his camera again, then at the river and the cliffs and the grounds of the ranch and laughed.
“What’s funny?”
“I just realized something. All those photos in the cabin. You took them, didn’t you?”
Reece held up his hands. “Guilty once again.”
“They’re gorgeous.”
“Thanks, Dana. My passion has been revealed.”
“I’ll keep it silent.” She stood and pointed at the river. “I think you missed your moment when the light was perfect.”
“I have a very strong feeling God will spill his lavish beauty on us all again tomorrow wherever we might be.” Reece glanced at his watch. “I need to go. We leave soon and I have to shut down the ranch.”
Reece closed his eyes and tried to sleep as they bumped along at thirty-five thousand feet on the way back to Seattle. He rubbed his face and stared at the thick clouds surrounding the plane. Symbolic. In a few hours the real battle would begin. Bring your light, Lord.
The time at the ranch had gone as well as he could have expected. Brandon and Dana seemed to be working together. But there was more work to be done there. Would they choose life when the chance came? The professor had stepped into the magic and embraced it. But the darkness of his regrets still hung over Marcus. Still held him back. And the darkness over Reece’s own soul had lifted little.
You killed them.
He pushed the thought out of his mind and sank into a fitful sleep. After picking up their luggage at baggage claim at Sea-Tac Airport, Reece gathered the three together.
“A final thought before we part.” Reece paused to look deep into their eyes. “In C. S. Lewis’s story The Silver Chair, two children stand at the end of the world in Aslan’s country. The Great Lion is about to send them into Narnia to carry out a crucial quest. He gives the girl, Jill, four signs that will guide them. Before he sends them he says, ‘Here on the mountain the air is clear and your mind is clear; as you drop down into Narnia the air will thicken. Take great care that it does not confuse your mind.’
“You’re coming off the mountain and about to enter into the second phase of your training. Stay strong in prayer. Your spiritual sense is more attuned now, but that means the attack of the nameless ones will also increase. Be on guard.” Reece hefted his pack over his shoulder.
“We meet again on Sunday to go to church together?” Marcus said.
“Yes. It’s time to immerse ourselves in religion.”
“Religion?” Brandon asked.
“It’s time for you to observe the greatest enemy of the church firsthand and experience religion in all its glory.”
“What does that mean?” Dana pulled her light brown hair back behind her head.
“At this service I suspect at least one of you will e
xperience something you’ll never forget.”
“Which one of us?” Marcus asked.
“I don’t know.” Reece pushed his hat down farther onto his head. “For some reason the Spirit doesn’t tell me everything.” He winked. “But he did say one of you would have your eyes opened so wide, you’ll think they’ve stretched out to the sides of your head.”
“I have the sensation it will be me,” Marcus said.
“Then get prayed up. If it is you, the curtain is about to be yanked back, and the wizard you’ll likely see behind it is a bit more ominous than the one from Oz.”
TWENTY-SIX
MARCUS ARRIVED IN THE PARKING LOT OF HILLCREST Creek Community Church fifteen minutes before the service was scheduled, and once again he tried to shake the feeling he was about to see things he wasn’t ready for. He tapped the power button on his steering wheel and Brandon stopped singing to him through the car’s speakers about living fully alive. Pretty fun to have become allies with a man he’d listened to for years.
Marcus wasn’t sure why it rankled him to imagine he would be the one chosen to see deeper into the spiritual world. maybe because the pace Reece had set for their spiritual discoveries was approaching light speed, and Marcus’s brain needed more time to process what they’d found. Yes, part of him wanted to accelerate as fast as reece, but another part wanted to take the time to analyze what had happened. At the same time the taste of God’s magnificence he’d seen so far drew him like he was underwater swimming toward the surface and running out of air. If this morning would bring more of the same, he would be ready.
More cars filled the lot and scads of families got out of their vehicles and traipsed into the church—Mom and Dad pressed and polished, little boys in matching shirts and slacks, and little girls in flowered dresses to complement the rare sun-drenched June morning.
Marcus glanced around the lot. He didn’t see any of the others. Wait. There. At the far end of the lot he spotted Reece’s beat-up Avalanche. A moment later he swung the door open and stepped onto the blacktop.
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