by Kaylee Ryan
I stand when I see Kinley’s SUV pull into the drive, watching as all three girls climb out. “Where’s your car?” Whit asks.
I point to the attached garage. “Mike parked it in the garage for some reason unknown to me. He said it was there, so we might as well use it.” I leave out the part where he said “we” have the space. I save that little tidbit just for me.
Liv laughs. “He’s so hooked.” She grins. “I never thought it would happen.”
“I said the same thing about Aaron. He was too picky until this one came along,” Kinley says, throwing her arm over Whit’s shoulders.
“Come on in,” I say, though I feel weird about it. This isn’t my place, after all.
“Be right in, some supplies we have to get first.”
I wait while they each grab a bag from the back of the SUV. “What is all of that?”
“Snacks and some alcohol,” Liv says.
“We bought some snacks and drinks too,” I tell them, holding the door open.
Whit looks at me. She caught the “we” and that makes her smile. It does me too. It also makes me sad because I have a week and a half left before I have to go home. I can’t stay here and live with him, live off him. I need to go back to Chicago and look for a job. Yeah, I have the severance money, but the longer I’m out of the workforce, the harder it’ll be to find a job.
After we put out the spread of snacks and mix some drinks, we settle in the living room with plates of food in hand. “So, Olivia.” Whitney smirks. “What’s up with you and David?”
“What do you mean?”
“We heard what he said the other night,” Kinley chimes in.
“He’s wearing you down?” I ask her.
“He’s brought it up, the marriage thing,” she confesses.
“And?” Whit asks.
“And….” She releases a heavy sigh. “I’ve felt stuck, you know. I love my job at the bar, love being behind the bar, but I can’t do that forever. I don’t want to be to be big and pregnant and slinging beers.”
“Who said anything about being pregnant?” Kinley asks.
“Are you?” I ask cautiously.
“No, but I want to be. We want to be.” She buries her face in her hands. “David and I have talked about it. We both want a family, and I just can’t see it with me working at the bar.”
“That’s why,” I say with a smile, and she turns to face me, a questioning look on her face. “Why you’re finally taking on more of a management roll, like Mike’s been trying to get you to do for years.”
“You know about that?”
“Yeah, we talk.” I study her. “What’s the real reason you’ve been hesitant to take on more at the bar?”
“Mike, mostly. When he took over, he was so focused on the bar, on keeping the reputation but modernizing things a bit. He devoted himself to the renovations. He lived for the bar. At first I was afraid to step on his toes. He’s always been passionate about it being our legacy and keeping it strong. He wouldn’t date, wouldn’t even entertain the idea, he was so focused.”
The three of us nod and she continues.
“I didn’t want to take that away from him. I was afraid that if I stepped in and changed my role, he would feel like he was losing part of what he’s worked so hard for.”
“You’re wrong. He loves you, Olivia. He’s told me several times how he wishes it was the two of you together. He did it all so you wouldn’t have to. He thought that if he could take that stress away from you, that you would want to be more involved.”
She wipes a tear from her eyes and gives me a watery smile. “Anyway, when he met you that weekend all those months ago, I saw him slowly change. He would ask about you, trying to be nonchalant and not succeeding.”
Whit laughs. “He did the same thing to me.”
“After you came back—what was it, like six months later—and you stayed with him, that’s when he really started to change. He pushed me to take on more, and that’s when I knew he was ready. He’s found someone who means more to him than the bar.”
I gasp and Olivia smiles. “It’s true, Jamie. He’s changed so much, for the better. He was working himself to death, not enjoying life. Now he leaves before closing and is happy to let me take a night. He doesn’t call to check on me or the staff. It’s like a lightbulb has finally turned on and he realizes that we have great staff who are well-trained.”
“I worry I’m a distraction for him,” I confess. That causes all three of them to laugh.
“You are exactly what he needs,” Kinley assures me, then looks at Olivia. “So back to you. Is he any closer to wearing you down?”
“Yeah, I think he is,” she says, tipping back her drink. “What about you? How are things with you and Evan?”
“Perfect.” McKinley smiles. “We’re talking about another baby.”
“What?” Whit screeches. “That’s awesome. Wait… can you wait on me?”
“Are you trying soon?” I ask Whit. I’ve missed her and missed girl time.
“We are. I mean, I don’t want to wait and neither does he. You’ve seen him with Lex and Walker. My ovaries are in overdrive every time I see him with them.”
We all nod. Aaron Mills is a sucker for his niece and nephew. He’s going to be an amazing father.
“And you.” Whit raises her glass and points at me. “Time to spill. He hasn’t let you out of his sight since you got here.”
I can feel my face heat. “What do you want to know?” I pretend the blush isn’t coating my cheeks.
“Everything,” they all three say at once.
“I’m in deep,” I confess.
“So is he,” Olivia assures me.
“Is this weird? I mean, I know he’s your brother. I don’t want to—”
She raises her hand, cutting me off. “I’ve been pushing to get the two of you together since the night he met you. Like I said, I saw subtle changes. I would mention you just to see his eyes light up with interest. I knew then that he wanted you. This though.” She waves her hand around his house. “He doesn’t bring girls here. Hell, he hasn’t taken the time to date in over two years.”
“I kind of just showed up,” I remind her.
“This weekend, but not all the times before. He brought you here.”
“So what gives?” McKinley asks.
I shrug. “I’m not sure. Neither one of us brings it up really. Which is crazy because we talk about everything but that. Well, mostly. He did tell me he wants me here.” I smile as I think back to that conversation.
“What are you thinking about right now?” Whit asks.
“Just something he said.”
“Dish.” Liv grins over the rim of her glass. “That look says it’s good.”
I bite down on my lip and worry if I should tell them.
“What we say during girl time stays between us. Don’t think they don’t talk about us when it’s just them,” Kinley assures me. “I think they’re worse than us,” she says, causing us all to laugh.
“Is it bad that I can recite what he said word for word?” I ask them.
“Hell no, that just means it was the right thing for him to say. All the feels?” Whit asks.
I nod. “I want you here. For two weeks, two years, two decades, the rest of our lives. Whatever I can get, I want it with you.” I repeat his words with my eyes closed, remembering that morning with him. I realize the girls are quiet and slowly I open my eyes. They’re all smiling, and Liv is wiping under her eye.
“He loves you,” she whispers.
“No, we’re just… growing close, is all.”
“Bullshit,” Whit says sternly. “Admit it.”
I sit there, hands in my lap, wringing them together. I think about how just seeing a text from him brightens my day, how I crave the sound of his voice and his arms wrapped around me. He’s more to me than any man before him.
“I love him,” I confess quietly.
“He loves you too,” they all three say at
the same time.
It’s freaky the way they do that. I bury my face in my hands and feel the hot tears behind my eyes. “I don’t know what to do.”
“Just do what you’ve been doing. Everything will work out the way it’s supposed to,” McKinley assures me.
“How can you be so sure?” I ask her.
“Evan and I didn’t have it easy. Some miscommunication had us both thinking that the other wanted different things, which could not have been further from the truth. I wanted him and he wanted me. We were just too stubborn to see it. If I can give you any advice, it’s to be open and honest with how you feel, with what you want. Everything else will fall into place.”
“Look at me and Aaron. I left trying to keep from hurting him and actually hurt him in the process. If I would’ve just been honest with him, it would’ve saved us all a lot of grief.” Whit looks away, but not before I see her eyes glistening.
“So you’re saying I should tell him that I’m in love with him?”
“If that’s how you feel, deep in your soul, then tell him,” Olivia says. “If it’s not, please don’t. I know he loves you and losing you is going to kill him. Don’t give him false hope.”
“I’m not, at least I’m not meaning to. But one of us is going to have to sacrifice something, and I don’t know how to do that. I don’t want to be selfish and ask him to give up the family business and come to Chicago with me, but then again I want that. I want him with me.”
“Take it one day at a time. It will all work out,” Kinley assures me.
“It’s going to be so damn hard to leave him after the wedding.”
My three friends look at me with sympathetic smiles. Things are so damn confusing. How will we know what’s right? I don’t want either of us to have any regrets.
“Enough of the heavy, let’s talk about the honeymoon.” Liv waggles her eyebrows at Whitney. “Are you all set? Got all your sexy lingerie packed?”
I watch as Whit blushes. “Maybe,” she giggles.
The rest of the night, we talk and laugh about anything and everything. It’s not until I hear keys in the door that I realize how late it is. Mike comes into view and grins when he sees us.
“Ladies,” he says, leaning over the couch and kissing the top of my head.
“Aw,” my friends say again in unison. Like I said, scary stuff.
He chuckles. “Good thing I called the guys. They should be here soon.” He walks around to stand in front of me, holding his hand out for me. I place mine in his and he brings it to his lips for a kiss before he gently tugs, pulling me to my feet. He takes my seat and brings me down on his lap. “Missed you,” he whispers in my ear.
I melt against him. “I missed you,” I say, but I don’t whisper. Our friends laugh.
“Knock, knock,” David calls out from the entryway. “Hey, babe,” he greets Liv.
“Hi. Thanks for coming to get me.”
“Wife.” Evan grins at Kinley. “You have a good time?”
“We did, right, ladies?” she giggles.
“And you, Future Mrs. Mills, you ready to head home?” Aaron asks.
Whit smiles up at him shyly and nods.
“Thank you so much for tonight. I had so much fun,” I say to the group.
“Thanks for the call, man.” David bumps fists with Mike. We all say our goodbyes and walk out on the porch.
“Drive safe,” he calls out as we wave to our friends driving off. “Let’s get you inside.”
“Sorry about the mess.” I survey the drink glasses and plates all over.
“Did you have a good time?”
“Yeah, it was nice.” I step out of his hold to start cleaning up and he pulls me back to his chest.
“I’ll put the food away. The rest can wait until tomorrow.” He studies me. “How much did you drink, babe?”
I hold up my thumb and index finger to attempt to show him. “Lil’ bit,” I say against his chest.
He chuckles. “Go up and get ready for bed. I’ll be right up.” He kisses my temple and releases his hold on me.
Doing as he says, I stumble my way to his room and strip out of my clothes. I’ve been sleeping in his shirt—well, on the nights that we go right to sleep. I’m thinking this is one of those nights. I didn’t realize I had drank that much.
In the bathroom, I wash my face and brush my teeth before climbing into my side of the bed. I know I’m wearing a goofy-ass smile when I think about having a side. He has one at my place too. I like it. I more than like it.
“What’s got you smiling like that?” Mike asks, entering the room and already stripping out of his clothes.
“This is my side of the bed.”
He chuckles. “Yeah?”
“Uh-huh, and you have a side at my place too.”
He shakes his head in amusement and heads to the bathroom. I let my eyes drift closed. His bed is so damn comfortable. I jolt when he climbs into bed and pulls me into him.
“Sorry, didn’t mean to wake you. Just needed for you to get into your spot,” he whispers.
“I’m on my side,” I say sleepily, relaxing into his hold.
“You’re side of the bed, but that’s not your spot. This is your spot, in my arms. This is where you belong.”
I feel him press a kiss to my head. “I love this spot,” I say with a yawn.
“Me too, baby. Get some sleep.”
Snuggled in his arms, I let myself drift off to sleep.
She leaves on Sunday. That gives me six more days with her. I’ve grown used to her being here. Sleeping with her in my arms at night. I don’t want her to go. I’ve rehearsed asking her to stay what feels like a million times, but I just can’t ask her to give up her dream.
I’ve thought a lot about what that means. If I can give up the bar, give up my family’s legacy to go with her. I’ve yet to come to a conclusion. I hate it and it’s not fair. I do know that I can’t do long distance. For a while, maybe, but that’s not what I want full time. I want her in my arms at night. I want to come home to her. Her stuff on the bathroom sink, her shampoo in the shower. I want to see the blanket she covers up with thrown over the couch, or her shoes by the door. I like the thought of her car parked in the garage. I want her life so entwined with mine that you can’t tell it was ever separate.
I just don’t know how to make that happen. Not without being selfish.
“Ready,” she says, stepping into the living room.
I let my eyes rake over her and she literally takes my breath away. “Yes. This is long overdue, don’t you think?”
She shrugs. “Not really. I like our life.” Her eyes widen and she backpedals. “I mean, I like us, you know, how we are. We don’t need all the fancy stuff. We’re just… us. I’ll take spending time with you any way I can get you. I like our quiet nights at home though. They’re really growing on me.”
“Me too, but it’s time I took you out. I want you to have everything.” I pull her into my arms and kiss her gently.
She slides her hands under my shirt. “Well, let’s go, country. Show me what this dating thing is all about,” she teases. Her hands slowly slide down my back and I can no longer feel her skin on mine.
“Come on, you.” I grab her hand and lead her out to my truck.
“Outback?” she laughs.
“What?” I ask, holding in my own laughter.
“Nothing, it’s perfect. It’s us.”
“I thought so.”
She shakes her head, wearing a grin as she climbs out of my truck.
“Bloomin’ onion?” she asks once we’re seated and have ordered our drinks.
“I don’t know, isn’t there a rule about no onions or garlic on date nights?”
“I’m a sure thing, Wallace. We’re getting the bloomin’ onion.” She winks.
“So when is Whit taking you from me for all the wedding stuff?” I ask, cutting off a piece of bread.
“Not until Friday. We have the rehearsal dinner, but you’ll be there
for that.
“Not as bad as I thought. I was worried this week was going to be me sitting at home missing you.”
She smiles. “Nope. I’m all yours until Friday night.”
“Just until then?” I ask her. We’ve been avoiding talking about this, and we both know we need to.
“How long do you want me?” She’s going for humor, but I can tell she really wants an honest answer to the question.
“Is forever too long?” I ask, my eyes locked onto hers.
“Mike,” she says softly.
“I don’t know how we make this work. I don’t know how to do it without one of us giving up something, but I know I want you, so we probably need to talk about it. See where we fit, how we can combine our worlds.”
Her eyes mist over. “I want that, I just don’t know how.”
I place my hand over hers that rests on the table. “We figure it out together.”
She nods and pulls her hand away when the waitress arrives with our appetizer. She laughs and wipes her eyes. “Dig in, country. I’m going home with you tonight, remember,” she tries to lighten the mood.
I let her, keeping the conversation light the rest of the night. At some point in the next couple of days, we really need to talk, but this isn’t the right place to have that conversation. I need to be somewhere I can hold her close. I need to show her what she means to me. I just enjoy the here and now and the beautiful woman sitting across from me.
“Thank you for dinner,” she says when we get back to my place to watch a movie.
Snagging my hand around her waist, I pull her close and hold her. “I have an idea.” I pull my phone out of my pocket and pull up my music app, scrolling through until I land on the song I’m looking for. Kane Brown’s “Better Place” flows through the speaker. I turn up the volume and set my phone on the table. “Dance with me,” I say, reaching out for her.
