“It's perfect...” she replied and looked back at the singer, the radiant joy was gone, but she smiled anyway. “You have no idea how important this is to me.”
He didn’t really know, but wanted to know everything about her.
“So, tell me...”
“No” Lissa denied categorically and with a quick movement, she replaced the sunglasses. “Take care of your own life, Gabriel.”
Embarrassed and at the same time intrigued by the sudden harshness of Melissa, the singer decided to just leave her alone. Maybe the girl suffered from bipolar disorder. His mother would be able to tell him about the symptoms of the disorder, since she was a renowned psychiatrist, perhaps he would call her later, or perhaps he would just drop the subject and go about his own life, as Melissa had told him.
With an exasperated sigh, he decided to check his social networks. The photo with Melissa already had thousands of likes and some unfriendly comments. His fans were dead with jealousy. The singer was unable to suppress a giggle at the thought of what they would do if they knew that the girl sulking beside him in the picture, had won far more than a flash yours.
“Gabriel?” Arthur's deep voice called out.
When he looked up, the Rockstar noticed his best friend staring curiously at him in the rearview mirror.
“What?” It was the grumpy response. Did not he even have the right to enjoy himself?
“It sounds like your nanny is in a bad mood..." Melissa commented with her usual biting humor.
“Just worried,” Arthur defended himself. “Gabriel's been a little strange since you showed up.”
The natural for any girl would be to become irritated and start a hysterical scene. But Melissa Bittencourt didn’t do that. Sometimes she seemed totally devoid of emotion. When she answered Arthur, her voice had sounded as glacial as the mountains of Alaska.
“I did not show up," she said, looking out the window. “It was you who brought me."
After that, there was only silence inside the car. That, definitely, wasn’t a good day. For none of them.
♫
In the hotel room, Gabriel didn’t know how to speak or act in the face of the restlessness of the girl, who was eagerly looking for control of the air conditioner.
“Finally!” She exclaimed as she managed to get the machine to work.
“I didn’t know you were so warm,” he chirped, trying to play with a taut smile. “Maybe you should get rid of those hot clothes as fast as you can.”
"Yeah." She shrugged. "I never leave Seattle, and since it's almost always cold there, I did not have other kinds of clothes to bring.”
It was a lie. Obvious. Anyone nowadays has the information in the internet. Fortunately, Gabriel was too kind to not point out the brazen lie.
“I see.” He nodded sympathetically. “For anything is just calling my suite. Number 1054.”
“OK. Thank you!”
As soon as the singer was gone and the girl made sure the door was locked, she tore off the long sweater she wore and threw it to the floor in anger. She was melting! The next step was to slip under the cold shower, where she stayed for long minutes. After the bath and, with the room well refreshed, she finally felt she could breathe.
“The challenge now is to find what to wear.” She said sadly to herself.
As soon as she opened the suitcase and began to remove some of the pieces, she heard a knock on the door. After asking the visitor to wait a second and to have dressed any clothes, Melissa had gone to answer the call. To her surprise, a middle-aged man wearing a hotel uniform handed her some bags and a note. Before she could question or even thank him, the man turned his back on her and left. Intrigued, Melissa dumped the contents of the bags on the bed and was surprised to find several small dresses. She didn’t even have to read the note to understand what that meant. Even so, she unfastened the paper, which she had unknowingly pressed in her hand, and read it.
“I apologize on behalf of the entire team for not
having worried more about your basic needs.
This is not going to happen again.
I had no idea ofthe size of your clothing,
so the saleswoman helped me as best she could.
I hope that you like.
Welcome to Texas!
Gabriel.”
With her heart leaping and her eyes watering, Melissa studied the dresses again. It was perfect for the hot, stuffy climate of that city. Gorgeous for the body of any young woman... Less to yours, which was marked by innumerable scars and unlimited violence. With a painful sob, the girl lay on the bed, clutching her presents and weeping to the point of squirming. She wishes she could wear those dresses... She wanted to use them for Gabriel. But she couldn’t, could never, because she was a farce. Her life was too screwed to deceive with that fairy tale where Angela was stuck. And it was with the awareness that she needed an end to that lie, that she fell asleep, exhausted from crying.
CHAPTER NINE - STAY
“'Cause when you never see the lights
It's hard to know which one of us is caving”[13]
G abriel Voss was anxious in a way he had never been before, not even before he started a show. He wanted to know what Melissa had thought of the dresses, especially since he had chosen them himself.
The singer slowed the pace of the treadmill, putting an end to his daily exercise program. He wiped the sweat out of his face and took a sip of his water bottle.
“Mr. Voss?” A woman whispered beside him.
Gabriel realized that she was an employee of the academy.
“Yes? How can I help you?”
“Could you give me an autograph? It's for my daughter... Her name is Ellyn and she's a huge fan yours.” She bit her lip hard and handed him a piece of paper.
Gabriel's bodyguard took a step toward him, but the singer stopped him with a shake of his head, indicating that everything was fine.
“I give you an autograph as well as tickets for Friday's show.”
The woman's eyes widened and brightened.
“Oh!” She exclaimed. “You're very kind. My Ellyn will be so happy! The poor girl was devastated because she couldn’t buy the ticket in time. They sold out in less than twenty-four hours.”
Gabriel smirked. He wasn’t knowing about the show's revenue, that was in Arthur's hands, but he always noticed that the performances were packed. And now he had the confirmation of his splendid success. It was great to know that he was winning so many people with his music.
“Here it is...” He handed her the paper and searched for the name on the badge “Janette.”
“Thank you, Mr. Voss!”
“Tell Ellyn she has a wonderful and brave mother.”
Both, Gabriel and Janette, knew she had risked her own job to get close to him. The rules of the hotel made it very clear that it was strictly forbidden to bother celebrities.
“What a mother doesn’t do for a child, does not she, Mr. Voss?"
“Certainly, Janette, and don’t worry, your job will be safe. If you have any problem do not hesitate to look for me. I'll ask my production to hand you the tickets. I hope you and Ellyn enjoy it a lot.”
The emotional and grateful smile of that woman would be imprinted on Gabriel Voss's memory forever. Make someone happy was the best reward he could have in his busy career.
♫
Later, bathed in, lying on the bed of his suite as he stared at the ceiling, the Rockstar felt bored. Arthur was finishing the week's agenda adjustments along with the rest of the team and the band should be enjoying the last days off around town.
In fact, Gabriel Voss knew the real reason for his uneasiness: The absence of Melissa. The singer was already accustomed to the presence of the girl and missed her. Somehow, that girl had become an important part of his routine, and do not have her around had disturbed him. Then, ignoring the voice in his mind that screamed for him to leave the girl alone, the rocker picked up the phone and dialed the numbers in Melissa's suite, wait
ing for her to answer. It did not happen. He tried three more times and nothing... Not even her cell phone was answered.
Beginning to worry, he quickly put on his shirt and pants and left the room, heading for her suite. Placing her on a floor away from his own could only have been Arthur's idea. The singer sighed in frustration and pressed the elevator button several times.
“Holy shit, Melissa! Where are you?” He exclaimed, typing the floor number while calling her cell phone again. Once more falling into the mailbox.
Distressed, the singer quickly crossed the wide hallway. He was about to run. Melissa knew one of the rules of the contest well: Always be communicable. If production were to lose contact with her, she would automatically be disqualified. It was a security measure, for both for them. That's why Melissa was on her cell phone at full volume twenty-four hours a day.
As soon as he reached the desired door the singer knocked a few times and called. Nothing. Trying to control the nervousness that was taking hold of him, Gabriel hit once more. When he would found her, he would provide a bodyguard to take care of her. It was already decided. Melissa Bittencourt was in the care of Voss’s staff and anything that happened to her would total their responsibility. But, Gabriel wasn’t worried about his name or his team. All he wanted was that the girl was all right.
“Melissa!” He called, forcing the knob in a pure act of uncontrol. It was open.
Ignoring common sense and not caring about the invasion of privacy, Gabriel entered the room and almost collapsed with relief when he saw that the girl was sleeping. Unable to contain himself, the singer approached a little more and his moment of comfort dissipated when he saw her... Destroyed. Yes, Voss could not find another word to describe her at that moment.
Melissa was clinging to the dresses. There was a frightened look on her face, which was glowing with tears. Intrigued, the singer watched the room, looking for some clue of what might have happened to her. Apparently, there was nothing. All he found were some clothes outside the suitcase and an open notebook. To his astonishment, there were several photos of him glued there. So, Melissa was really his fan. He didn’t know if he felt happier or more envious.
Before he knew it, the notebook was already in his hands as he flipped through the pages. What he found there robbed him of any trace of contentment. That was not a fan binder. Shocked, Gabriel carefully read the innumerable information about him. Melissa had a real dossier about him. In fact, it looked more like an instruction manual. Suddenly, he felt sick. As if his hands burned, the singer dropped the notebook and decided he needed to wake Melissa up. She had explanations to give him.
“Melissa!” He called, shaking her gently. As much as he was angry, he could never be rude to her, especially when she seemed so frail “Melissa, wake up!”
After a few minutes shaking, the girl woke up. She sat up abruptly and leaned back against the back of the bed. She seemed to have awakened from a nightmare.
“Gabriel, what?” Her voice didn’t have the usual sourness, and her eyes were always wounded and ready for the attack, now were out. Melissa didn’t look like the girl Gabriel had known.
“You didn’t answer my phone calls. I was worried...”
What is he doing? She owed him explanations, not the other way around. However, Gabriel was unable to accuse her of something perceiving her so... Broken.
“I fell asleep. Excuse me” She answered the truth, trying to think of how she would put the plan in place before falling asleep in practice now that Gabriel was in front of her.
The singer felt the urge to shake her back. I could not bear to see her so weak... So hollow.
"Did you like the dresses?" The stupid question escaped through his mouth before he could analyze them. His mind was too upset.
“Yes. They're beautiful ... It’s bad I can’t use them.” Lissa glanced at the many dresses scattered across the bed. They were crumpled, marked by the weight of her body, as well as her soul.
“What?” Voss heard himself ask, and he doesn’t liked Lissa’s tone of voice.
"I'm leaving, Gabriel.” The initial plan was to do what she knew best: run away without giving anyone a chance to stop her, but for the first time she could no longer pretend to be strong and, besides, Gabriel had been kind and loving. He deserved the truth.
The singer frowned and stared at her in shock.
“What did you say?”
“This situation has gone on for too long. I need to make an end” She was so emotionally tired that if possible, she would put an end to everything that bothered her, but she couldn’t. He would have to accept the fact that her life was a bomb about to explode and live with it. At least, until Angela left her.
“Melissa, what are you talking about? Does this have to do with that notebook full of information about me?”
The girl stared at the dropped object and sighed sadly. Apparently, the fate agreed with her. It was time to end this farce.
“Well... That makes things easier.” She said, standing up resolutely.
“Will you please explain to me what's going on?”
She stared at him with those dead eyes Gabriel had hated. He wanted the stubborn, unshakable girl back.
“I'm a farce, Gabriel. That's what's happening. You're a nice guy and you don’t deserve it.”
“What?” That's all he could ask. Something told him he would not like the answer, but he had to know.
“I'm not your fan. My friend Angela that is. Since she couldn’t travel, she enrolled me in the contest to be able to document it for her. I'm sorry. I really do.”
For a moment, the Rockstar felt he was being stabbed in the chest. What was most painful to him wasn’t that Melissa had been lying all this time, he was already suspicious that she wasn’t like other fans, but knew that he meant nothing to her.
“That's why I need to leave.” She continued, putting the clothes lying in the suitcase, unable to look at the singer. “I do not deserve to be here.”
“You can’t leave the contest,” he gasped, being consumed by growing despair. “You can’t leave me, Melissa.”
She chose to ignore what she was hearing, and set about arranging her luggage. It was only the disbelief and the hurt that made him say what he said. When she had finished, she passed him by pulling the wheel case.
Not even the lack of tact with which she had told that he had been deceived had made him so angry as her position to leave him without even looking back. And it was with his heart in jumps that the singer stepped forward and locked the door, putting the card in his pocket.
“What the hell are you doing, Gabriel?” She exclaimed irritated. He was just making everything more painful. Despite the hard face, Lissa was devastated and all she wanted was to do what was right and disappear before she succumbed
“You will not leave without clarifying things first.”
“What do you still not understand? It's all clear. I'm a fucking liar, okay? I'm taking the place of a real fan. I know you're angry, so it's best to end this farce as soon as possible!”
“No!” The singer raised his voice. “That can’t end like this. You...” He paused for a second, taking a deep breath, aware that he wasn’t worried about a fan leaving his tour before even started... It was much more than that. Miss Melissa's presence, teasing him, pinning him, kissing him... That was what despaired him. “You can’t just turn your back on everything like that!”
“Gabriel...” she whispered in despair. After all, she wanted to stay, she wanted to be who he thought she was, but she couldn’t say anything else, because she had the singer's lips on hers, kissing her desperately.
Unable to resist him, Melissa responded to the kiss, pulling at him with an animalistic urgency, desperate to appreciate that unique sensation for the last time, trying to keep the feeling inside herself, never to forget it. They only parted when their bodies cried for air.
“Don’t go away...” Gabriel asked, leaning his forehead against hers.
“I hav
e to go.” She said, pulling away. “I'm sorry.”
It was then that the singer realized that she had taken the card in his pocket. But as soon as she unlocked the door, he caught her by the arm and pulled her back. He was about to try to stop her, but his eyes rested on the wrist he held and what he saw made him speechless. Melissa's fair skin was scarred.
Realizing that it had been discovered, the girl felt as if she lost the ability to breathe. It wasn’t for him to discover, it wasn’t for anyone to discover, especially that way. She tried to dodge the singer, she couldn’t deal with the accusatory look he would surely give her. She would die a little if he saw her as the freak she was. But Gabriel had already lifted the sleeve of her blouse and analyzed the extent of the wounds. Gushing at every new discovery.
“Let me go!” She screamed, realizing that she was crying in an afflicted way. “Damn it, Gabriel, let me go!”
But the rocker was too shocked to hear it. He felt his heart tearing in half as he imagined what would have led her to self-flagellate herself that way.
Sensing that she would faint at any moment, Melissa used her free hand to punch the singer's chest, trying to push him away. It didn’t work, it only made him wake up from the trance he was in, and take his eyes off her arm to lock them in her face.
His gaze, contrary to what she believed, was not accusatory. He was afflicted, fearful, desperate, like Angela's on the day she caught her cutting. With so little time and she understood that he had somehow become fond of her. And that was all Melissa didn’t want to happen. If he had fallen in love with her, she would hurt him in the end.
When he brought his fingertips up to her face and tried uselessly to stave off the tears, she wanted to die.
Why was he being affectionate, dammit? She had lied and cheated, and now it was an anomaly, a crazy girl who, to deal with what she carried within herself, cut herself off. She didn’t deserve the compassion she saw in his gaze, much less the care he cherished her. The whole damn thing is she wanted to deserve, she wanted to cringe in his arms and cry all the tears she'd been trying to contain over the past few years. She wanted to go back in time and have done everything right, preventing her life from becoming that disgrace... Looking at Gabriel, she wanted so many things that she would never have; this made her felt like she was dying inside.
Broken Angel (English Edition) Page 11
