Zane's the Other Side of the Pillow

by Zane

  I couldn’t stand the thought of Jemistry back up on that stage at The Carolina Kitchen on poetry night, reciting a poem that had something to do with me and her hatred toward me. I had to keep looking for her. I had to make things right.

  Chapter Eighteen

  “When I say I love you, please believe it’s true. When I say forever, know I’ll never leave you. When I say good-bye, promise me you won’t cry. Cause the day I’ll be saying that would be the day I die.”

  —Unknown

  For the next week and a half, every day when I left work, or all day if I was off, I sat out in Jemistry’s parking lot waiting for her to go in or come out. No sign of her and no sign of Winsome. I knocked several times as well—no answer. So then I resorted to becoming a slipshod private detective and knocked on a few of her neighbors’ doors to ask if anyone had seen her. One elderly woman said that she thought she had seen Jemistry putting some trash in the outdoor dumpster “a week or so ago.”

  I was so serious about it that I would bring something to eat and drink with me and make sure that I had plenty of gas to run my air-conditioning in the car as long as possible. It was extremely hot that summer and the humidity was high. One thing that I did notice was that, outside of parents or nannies bringing young infants and toddlers out to the play area, there were hardly any children between the ages of five and twelve outdoors doing anything. And if they were out there, it was because their younger siblings were on the playground. The younger kids would play under the watchful eyes of the parents and the older ones always had some kind of electronic gadget bolted to their hands. Either a handheld videogame system, a cell phone, or a tablet. It was preposterous and made me see firsthand why so many kids were overweight.

  Sucking up a bunch of unhealthy calories from sodas and juices. Eating a bunch of fast food or processed, microwavable foods at home. Being too sedentary and not being forced to exercise. Sure, there were parents who still insisted that their kids play sports, but letting them sit on their asses was quickly becoming “the new normal.”

  When I was a child, my parents made my sisters and me stay outside all day on the weekends, and for at least two hours after we completed our homework and dinner during the week. They didn’t care what we did, as long as it was some kind of activity. My sisters did a lot of Double Dutch, Hopscotch, and and-patting games. Or they played Mother, May I?, Red Light/Green Light, or Simon Says. My friends and I either skateboarded, rode our bicycles up, down, and around the block, or played stickball. We found something to do because there weren’t any other options. Nowadays, kids were playing high-tech video games, ruining their eyesight, encouraging migraines in the near future from looking at screens so long. They didn’t even know about the majority of the things we used to do outside.

  I was sitting there shaking my head and running all of those thoughts through my mind when I heard a tap on my driver’s side window. I looked up to see a Metropolitan Police officer standing there, with the billy club that he had used to hit the window in one hand and his other hand on the latch of his gun holster. I never even saw him pull up in his cruiser, I was so busy daydreaming.

  I nervously rolled down my window. “Good afternoon, officer.”

  “Sir, may I ask what business you have here?”

  I shrugged. “I’m waiting for a friend to get home.”

  “A friend? What’s your friend’s name?”

  I thought about it for a second. I didn’t want to bring any more drama into Jemistry’s life. For all I knew, she could have called them.

  “Why does it matter? I’m not bothering anyone, but I’ll leave immediately if you want.”

  “License and registration.”

  “Oh, wow, do we really have to go there?”

  “Sir, I’m not going to ask you again. There have been several complaints by residents stating that you are out here every day sitting in your vehicle for long periods of time. Why would you wait for days on end for your friend to return home?”

  I carefully took my wallet out of my back pocket and reached over to my glove compartment to get my registration. He bent down to watch my every move. I was a big dude and there were a lot of trigger-happy cops in DC. I could see the newspaper headline in my head: PROMINENT VASCULAR SURGEON FROM SIBLEY MEMORIAL SHOT DEAD BY METROPOLITAN POLICE.

  “Here you go,” I said as I handed him the items. “Do you mind if I’m honest with you?”

  He glared at me and practically snarled. “That would be your best bet right now.”

  “You look to be about the same age as me, so maybe you can relate to what I’m going through. I’m not a pedophile or a rapist; I have a clean record; and I’ve never committed a criminal act in my entire life. All that I am is a brother in love with a woman who doesn’t want anything to do with me. I’ve been sitting out here hoping for an opportunity to apologize yet again for something I never did.”

  I could tell that I had sparked his interest. “What do you mean?”

  I sighed. “She and I were dating. I promised her that I would never hurt her. I came over here one night about a month ago to cook her a romantic dinner after work. Her roommate got upset when I told her that I planned to ask my girl to move in with me and get married. I fell asleep. When I woke up, the roommate was giving me head. I pushed her off and got out my girl’s room right as she was walking in the front door. She jumped to conclusions, the roommate lied like a professional actress, and my girl kicked me out.

  “All I want is a chance to see if she’s cooled off enough to discuss it and hear me out. She’s been hurt time and time again in the past and, even if she never takes me back, I need her to know that I didn’t betray her like every other man before me.”

  “You couldn’t even make that shit up,” the officer said with a smirk.

  “I’m not making it up. I love her, but I’m willing to let her go. And after what just happened here today, I’m prepared to finally do that.” I looked at the building. “I’m not even sure she still lives here. I guess that I was holding out false hope. I haven’t seen her, her car, or even the roommate or her car. I don’t know what’s going on.”

  He handed my license and registration back. “I’ve been where you are. I’m a good man myself. Not flawless, but a good man. It took me forever to get my wife over her trust issues and insecurities.”

  “Well, it didn’t take me forever, but her river of pain runs deep. I wanted to be the one to put the smile back on her face. And I accomplished that for a short period of time.”

  We both fell silent for a few seconds.

  “If I let you slide, you promise not to come back around here?” he asked.

  “I promise. It’s over and the last thing that I wanted was to upset the neighbors. I never considered that, but I’m sure it definitely looked strange . . . me being out here all the time. It’s good to know that people actually call in and report stuff like that.”

  “Yeah, it’s a mixture and varies by neighborhood. Some neighbors are paranoid and will call if they see a person they don’t recognize walk by their house on the sidewalk. Others will watch someone get gunned down in front of them, not call, and then play dumb when we get there.”

  I nodded my head. “I can imagine.”

  “Take it easy, brother.”

  He started to walk away back to his cruiser.

  “Thanks for giving me a break.”

  He turned toward me as he opened his door and put his right foot inside the car. “Women won’t cut us a break. Sometimes we have to help each other out.”

  He got in and started up his engine. I pulled away and he followed behind me to the next corner and hooked a right.

  * * *

  The hospital was having a Fourth of July staff picnic. They did it yearly because, unlike most companies, hospitals never close on holidays. In fact, those are usually the busiest days. While people are supposed to be celebrating and relaxing, they end up doing some of the most life-threatening things. Alcohol leads to a lot
of madness on the Fourth. Putting too much lighter fluid on the grill and cooking part of yourself instead of just the meat. Shooting off illegal fireworks because you want to be the life of the party and blowing off a hand or finger, or taking out someone’s eye. Drunk driving while you’re cookout hopping. Getting angry over some bullshit and trying to kill someone who was one of your favorite people before the day started. It was a madhouse.

  Since most of the staff had to work, or at least be on call, the picnic was held on the grounds under a big tent. We were able to invite people if we wanted. I would have invited Jemistry, if she were still with me. I started not to even go out there, but, sans a couple of assists in operating room C earlier that morning, I was sitting in my office twiddling my thumbs and catching up on news on the Internet.

  Floyd barged into my office without knocking. “Get your ass out of that chair. You’re going out to the picnic with me.”

  “Maybe I’m crazy, but that sounded like an order to me,” I stated with much sarcasm. “Who do you think I am? Courtney?”

  “Whatever, man. Let’s roll out there and get something to eat. I heard they have some apple cobbler this year that is a must-have.”

  “Man, I’m already eating myself half to death. Women aren’t the only ones who turn to comfort foods after a breakup.”

  “Then that cobbler is shouting out your name. This weekend, we’ll hit the court so I can beat your ass in some b-ball.”

  “I swear, Denial is more than a river in Egypt. You’re straight up hallucinating. You sure you’re not hitting up the narcotics cabinets on the low?”

  We both chuckled as I got up and traded my white coat for my black pinstripe suit coat.

  “Tevin, what the hell? You need to leave that jacket off. You’ll detonate out there in that heat.”

  Floyd had a point. He had on a shirt, no tie, and had the first two buttons undone. It had to be at least ninety degrees outside and the tent might or might not make it worse.

  I took my jacket off. “Cool. Let’s roll.”

  I paused at the door. “Aren’t Courtney and the kids coming?”

  Floyd slapped me lightly on the back and guided me out. “Now you’re the one hallucinating. I can’t let my wife be around all of these women enrolled in the ‘dick-share’ program with me.”

  I shook my head without responding as we headed for the elevators.

  * * *

  The apple cobbler was indeed off the hook. They had Upper Crust do the catering. The sister, Karen Black Wright, who owned it, had a great reputation in the area and I’d always wanted to try out her food. Sibley went all out. In addition to hamburgers, hot dogs, and the regular Fourth of July food staples, they had grilled chicken, lamb chops, ribs, pulled pork, and all the fixings. For a second, I was predicting having to waddle back up to my office.

  “You look stuffed,” a female voice from behind me said.

  “Oh, man, that’s an understatement,” I replied.

  She walked around and took the seat next to me at the table, without even asking if it was vacant. Floyd was off someplace doing God knew what with God knew whom. I had not seen him after the first ten or fifteen minutes of coming down there.

  She held out her hand to shake mine. “I’m Magdalena Chavez.”

  “Tevin Harris,” I said, accepting her hand.

  “Are you a doctor here, or in the administration? I’ve never seen you around.”

  “Actually, I’m a vascular surgeon.” I looked at her. She was definitely an attractive Latina. Long, black silky hair, a smooth, olive complexion, great teeth, banging body. But not for me because she wasn’t Jemistry. “What about you? You work here?”

  “Oh, no, I’m with Lincoln Pharmaceuticals. I’m here quite often though, but most of the drugs I deal with are for the oncology unit.”

  “Gotcha. That’s why we’ve never crossed paths.”

  She eyed me seductively for a few seconds. “I’m not usually this forward, but I have to ask. Are you single?”

  “Technically, yes, but I’m taking a hiatus from dating.”

  “Damn shame. And why is that?”

  “Hope. Very likely false hope that the woman I want to marry will come back to me.”

  Magdalena giggled uncomfortably. “Well, where the hell did she go?”

  “Good question. I can’t find her. She’s never at her place and she’s off work for the summer so I can’t stake out her office.”

  “Wow, you’d actually do a stakeout?”

  I smirked. “Been there, done that. Got the T-shirt.”

  “You must really love her.”

  “More than I love my next breath. She’s everything to me, but I’m trying to face facts.”

  “So what happened?”

  I started playing with the remnants of the cobbler on my paper saucer with a plastic spoon. “It doesn’t matter.” I paused and glanced at her. “Besides, we just met. I don’t want to burden you with my issues. This is a Fourth of July celebration. An extravaganza.”

  Magdalena scanned the tent. While there were a lot of people there, most were talking about the latest articles in medical journals, bragging about their skills in an attempt to see who was the smartest doctor on staff, or stuffing food in their mouths.

  “I wouldn’t go so far as to call it an extravaganza. It actually kind of sucks,” she said.

  “I’d have to agree.”

  “Do you want to go for a walk?”

  I shook my head vehemently. “No, no thank you.”

  “It’s only a walk. Seems like you could walk off some of those calories so you won’t fall asleep at your desk.”

  “Listen, Magdalena. You seem like a lovely woman, but I don’t want to waste your time. I’m not in the right place to even engage in any type of romantic conversation, and I’m a grown man. I can tell when a woman is coming on to me.”

  “Well, you can’t blame a girl for trying,” she said as she got up from the table. She reached into her purse and pulled out her business card, then laid it in front of me. “Let me know if you change your mind. We can grab a quick bite, even here in the cafeteria, if you want. I’m usually around on Tuesdays and Thursdays.”

  I didn’t respond as she walked off and Floyd appeared out of nowhere behind me, grabbing onto my shoulders. “Damn, who was that?”

  I stood up and gathered my trash. “A pharmaceutical rep. I’m surprised you haven’t picked her up already.”

  “You and me both, but there’s always time. Did she give you her number?”

  “Yes, but I’m not giving it to you.” I tucked her card in my shirt pocket. “You’re not going to call that woman and harass her out of the blue.”

  “Then you definitely need to be hitting that!”

  Floyd was too loud and I gazed around to see if anyone had heard him. “Damn, do you have to be so loud?” I noticed that he appeared disheveled. “Where have you been?”

  He chuckled. “Let’s just say that screwing in a helicopter isn’t easy.”

  “You didn’t?!” I exclaimed.

  “Hey, it’s not like anyone is being airlifted at the moment.”

  “How did you even get access to one of the helicopters?”

  “Haven’t you seen the female pilot that started a few months ago?”

  I shook my head. Floyd was a maniac. He had zero respect for his wife.

  “Floyd, you need to slow your roll. I keep telling you that. You’re married and acting more single than any single man I know. And doing all of that at work will cost you in the long run. One of these women is going to expect you to leave Courtney for her and the proverbial skeleton is going to fall out of the closet.”

  “Stop trying to speak that shit into reality.”

  I waved him off. “I’m going back up to my office. Do you.”

  Floyd started talking to a group of candy stripers as I walked off. He was going to have to face the music sooner or later. He realized that, but, like a lot of men, decided to go for broke if
it was all eventually going to backfire anyway. Courtney was a great woman and she didn’t deserve that kind of treatment. No woman did.

  Chapter Nineteen

  “The most sincere feelings are the ones hardest to be expressed by words.”

  —Unknown

  Dad!”

  I was shocked to come home one evening and discover my father sitting on my front stoop, sipping on some Gatorade.

  He stood up and gave me a hug. There was a rental car parked in my driveway.

  “When did you get in?” I asked, shocked because he had never alerted me that he was coming.

  “I had to fly in for a conference in New York and thought I’d stop by here for a few days to spend some time with my one and only son.”

  I was excited to see him. “I’m glad you’re here. Come on in.”

  I unlocked the door and we went inside.

  “Do you want me to grab your luggage?”

  “I’ll get it later.” He went into my living room and walked around, checking everything out. “So how are things going?”

  “Things are good,” I lied. “Working hard, as usual; taking after you.”

  He sat down in the armchair and I sat on the sofa. “Have you eaten?” he asked. “We could go out. My treat.”

  “I had a sandwich a couple of hours ago, but if you’re hungry, we can either go out or order in.” Daddy was staring at me like he was trying to read me. I didn’t like it. “Why are you looking at me like that?”

  “I’ve always been honest with you, so I’ll come right out with it. Alexis told your mother about you getting dumped; your mother called me, and told me that I needed to come check on you since she knew you’d never discuss it with her.”